“Building Quality Relationships: With the Church – Sign the Dotted Line”
Eph. 5:32
It’s been many years since I placed in my files a little list entitled “How to Be a Church Member Without Being Religious.” Some of the behaviors listed are (1):
• “Put your name on the membership roll but let everyone know that you don’t want to get involved.”
• “Be sure to take off for most weekends so you can worship in the great outdoors.”
• “Squeal like a stuck pig when someone gets on the subject of money. Jesus never asked anyone for a donation.”
• “Criticize the leaders of your congregation. They probably need someone to keep them humble.”
• “Chauffeur your children to and from church school. Let God know you are trying your best to be a Christian parent.”
I have saved the list because in my 38 plus years of ministry I have encountered all those attitudes in members of the Church. It serves as a reminder that Christians, and the Church, are still in the process of what we call sanctification – still growing towards perfection.
But today my focus is not just on church members but on non-church members. My intent is not to step on any toes but, rather, to prick all our consciences. The basis of these pricks is Eph. 5:32. Two weeks we looked at what Paul had to say in the previous verses about the marriage relationship. But at the conclusion of his words on marriage he makes it clear that he held forth marriage as a human echo of the relationship between Christ and His Church. (32) “This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church.” That indicates that there is a strong connection between being a Christian and being united to Christ’s body, the Church.
To underscore and lift up the importance of church membership, I’ve chosen to address the issue by way of analyzing some of the most common excuses for avoiding church membership. First, there is the SEPARATIST. He or she thinks they like life outside the church. After all, they claim, “I CAN BE JUST AS GOOD A CHRISTIAN OUTSIDE THE CHURCH AS INSIDE IT.” We hear this one frequently. But here’s the question. Can you be just as good a soldier outside the army as inside it? Can you be just as good a volleyball player outside the team as on it? It’s possible – but highly unlikely. We will be better and more valuable on the team and in the church. Paul, in fact, makes it very clear earlier in this Ephesian letter, in chapter 4. He states that the purpose of church leaders is (12, 15-16) “…to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up…we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.” GROWTH AND LIFE COME FROM BEING PART OF THE BODY. The Body provides the structure for life.
Jacques Costeau once related the story of a dolphin that was listless in the water. Thinking it was sick they netted and examined it. Finding nothing wrong they injected it with a stimulant – but an hour later the dolphin died. The conclusion was that the dolphin may have been ostracized from the other dolphins – and when that happens dolphins often allow themselves to die. From Jesus Christ the whole body, as each part does its work, receives life. The danger for the separatist is lack of growth and slow, spiritual death.
A second excuse is offered by the PESSIMIST. She claims she’s just never sure. “I’M NOT SURE I’LL LIKE IT. WHAT IF I DON’T FIT?” Consider this. Someone tells you that the water temperature is 67 degrees and invites you to go swimming. You can hesitate and wonder if that’s warm enough for you or not. How’s the only way to know? Dive in and stay in the water for a while. THE ONLY WAY TO KNOW IS TO JOIN AND DIVE IN FULLY AND STAY FOR A WHILE. It’s better to be active somewhere than nowhere, to be involved somewhere than inactive anywhere. What if Jesus’ disciples had waited to follow Jesus until they were sure they were a good fit or positive they would like it? Instead they left everything and dove in – for three years – before they fully understood what it was all about and how they fit into the plan. The danger of the pessimist is that she will miss the chance to be part of a much greater plan.
Excuse number three is offered by the IDEALIST. He has a high view of the church. He won’t join because “THERE ARE TOO MANY HYPOCRITES IN THE CHURCH.” But do we join the church because we want to be like others or to more closely follow Jesus? Whom are we following anyway? Are we looking for perfection or grace? As one author wrote in his blog, “I believe that by staying in the church I earn the right to speak about the problems I see. It’s the old adage that you can criticize your family but no one else can. By staying with ‘my family,’ I can speak about our failures and the doubts I wrestle with….Isn’t the whole point to realize that brokenness invades everything – even our churches? Isn’t the whole point to model faithful, loving service to people we don’t like – even in our churches? Isn’t the whole point that Jesus came, not only to establish justice, but to save people from their self-righteousness even in our churches?” (2) THE TRUTH IS ANYONE CAN LOVE THE IDEAL CHURCH. THE CHALLENGE IS TO LOVE THE REAL CHURCH.(3)The danger for the idealist is that he will miss the power of love and the strength of family.
The fourth excuse is given by the PERFECTIONIST. She states her excuse very succinctly: “I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO JOIN.” Whether sincere or not, she hits the nail on the head. She’s right. Part of the beauty of the church is that it is the only organization that requires us to know how sinful we are before we can join. And the real truth is that NONE OF US IS GOOD ENOUGH TO JOIN – BUT WE DON’T NEED TO BE! The church is the place of grace. As the blogger pointed out, the reality is that the church is a group of difficult, broken, sinful people plodding their way to glory. (4) The kingdom of God is coming; it isn’t fully developed yet. The church is filled with sinners. Yet the good news is that Christ still loves the church, His Bride. He will continue to love the church as “Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.” (Eph. 5:25-27) As Ben Patterson concluded, “The church on the corner is not the church it should be, but it is the church that will one day be all God called it to be. To go public and join it is the first step in loving it as Jesus does.” (5) The danger for the perfectionist is that she will miss out on an abundance of grace and divorce herself from the privileges of being the Bride of Christ.
Excuse number five is offered by the REALIST. He figures that since the church is filled with sinners, there’s a good chance joining would not be a good experience – so why take the chance? “WHAT IF IT DOES NOT WORK OUT?” People like to be connected but not committed, to experience the joy and pleasures but not accept the responsibilities. It’s very much like preferring co-habitation instead of marriage. One of the main reasons for co-habitation is that there is a lesser commitment than when one takes vows before God and the Church. The perception is that it will be easier, at least in conscience, to break it off and split up because, after all, it’s no longer working and there was no commitment or vows to make it work. So with the church; we need to understand that being part of a church is not about having everything work out; rather IT’S ABOUT COMMITMENT. I began by stating that Paul makes it clear that he held forth marriage as a human echo of the relationship between Christ and His Church. So consider marriage. Which makes for a good marriage – dropping out when things aren’t working ideally or remaining committed and striving to make things work?
Someone put it this way. “…God will not permit us to live even for a brief period in a dream world...God is not a God of the emotions but the God of truth. Only that fellowship which faces such disillusionment, with all its unhappy and ugly aspects, begins to be what it should be in God’s sight…he who loves his dream of a community more than the Christian community itself becomes a destroyer of the latter, even though his personal intentions may be ever so honest and earnest and sacrificial.” (6) A poet poses the appropriate question. “When the Church seems dead, the work too slow, When the attendance is off, the songs too slow, When the prayers of the saints lack fervor and power, When the minister’s sermons seem stale and sour, Do you think, or do you look with a critical eye? Why not ask yourself this question: ‘Lord, is it I?’” The danger for the realist is that he will miss the richness of perseverance and the blessings of prolonged obedience.
The sixth excuse comes from the BIBLICIST. This one is one of the most familiar excuses. Meaning to be Scriptural in her stance the Biblicist says, “THE BIBLE DOESN’T REQUIRE MEMBERSHIP.” True- you will never see the words “Join the Church. Become a member.” Yet the reality is that the moment we accept and receive Jesus as our Savior we become part of the church. As P. T. Forsyth wrote, “The same act which sets us in Christ sets us also in the society of Christ.” (7) We join a particular congregation to bear witness to what is already the case spiritually. As Ben Patterson wrote, “Paul’s metaphor of the church as the bride of Christ best illustrates this. Can you imagine a man saying to his fiancée, ‘Dear, we are spiritually one. Please, let’s not spoil it by having a public ceremony and moving under the same roof and making love and opening a joint checking account and getting all organized to live together. Let’s keep this lovely thing between us spiritual.’ The fiancée might well doubt the future of their relationship. In the New Testament, THE REALITY OF THE SPIRITUAL IS MEASURED BY THE DEGREE TO WHICH IT BECOMES PHYSICAL.” (8)
The New Testament certainly pictures the Church as being made of of specific bodies. After Pentecost the 3,000 believers split into groups, based on geography, on where they lived. Believers identified in local bodies. Soon we read about the church of Galatia, the Church of Ephesus, the Church of Rome, and others. In Revelation 2 and 3 John hears Jesus’ words to 7 very specific churches bodies. Earlier in this letter to the Ephesian church Paul wrote (1:22-23 NLT) “God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made him head over all things for the benefit of the church. And the church is his body; it is made full and complete by Christ, who fills all things everywhere with himself.” (2:19-22 GNT) “So then, you Gentiles are not foreigners or strangers any longer; you are now citizens together with God's people and members of the family of God. You, too, are built upon the foundation laid by the apostles and prophets, the cornerstone being Christ Jesus himself. He is the one who holds the whole building together and makes it grow into a sacred temple dedicated to the Lord. In union with him you too are being built together with all the others into a place where God lives through his Spirit.” The danger for the Biblicist is that, no matter how well intentioned, she will end up standing against Scripture and therefore living in disobedience, cut off from the fullest blessings of life with Christ.
As I said at the outset of this sermon, my intent is not to step on any toes but, rather, to prick all our consciences. It’s not easy; I agree with Paul that “This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church.” But one thing is clear. It is impossible to be in a solid, fruitful relationship with Christ without being in a solid, committed relationship with his body, the church. And Jesus highly values the Church – in fact, Paul said, He gave Himself up for her. As Paul Cedar once wrote, the Church “…is not a building but it is the people of God! Not an organization but an organism – a functioning body of which Christ is the head! (Eph. 5:23). Not a dead corpse but the living bride of Christ! (Heb. 9:12) and established by the Holy Spirit! (Acts 2). Not founded upon a passing fancy but founded upon Jesus Christ as the chief cornerstone! (1Pt. 2:4-6). Not to become obsolete or outdated but to endure for eternity; the ‘very gates of Hades shall not prevail against it!’ (Mt. 16:18).” (9)
Yes – the Church is not perfect – and no individual church is perfect; Jesus is still working on purifying His bride – that means He’s transforming us. The question is, “Are you willing to sign on the dotted line of commitment to Jesus and His Church?” In Acts 2:42 we see a picture of the church where Luke wrote that the Christians ‘devoted themselves’ to developing life in the church. The Greek word used for devote means “to continue to do something with intense effort, with the possible implication of (doing so) despite difficulty.” Perhaps you’re already a member of Hope Church – or your home church. Maybe you’re a regular attender who hasn’t thought about becoming a member – or you might be a visitor or regular attender who has thought about it but has made all kinds of excuses. Whoever you are, whatever your situation, I challenge you to respond positively to the questions new members are asked upon joining Hope Church. “Do you promise to pray for yourself and for others, seeking God’s guidance as together we seek to grow in knowledge and understanding of the faith? Do you promise to show in your own person the joy of new life in Christ by active participation in the life of the church and by faithful attendance to worship, service, and the offering of prayers and gifts, to the glory of God? Do you promise to accept the spiritual guidance of the church, obeying its doctrines and its teachings, and do you promise to walk in the spirit of Christian love with the congregation, seeking the things that make for unity, purity, and peace?” Can you, will you respond in your heart, “God being my helper, I do?” Will you sign the dotted line of committed membership and devote yourself to Jesus through living actively in His church? Let us pray.
(1) Kenneth Tobler, in Pulpit Digest (unknown date)
(2) Blog entitled ‘15 Reasons Why I Stayed in the church’; author and source have been lost
(3) Bishop Joseph McKinney
(4) ‘15 Reasons’ blog
(5) ‘Why Join a Church?’, by Ben Patterson, in Leadership, Fall’84, p. 80-81
(6) Source unknown
(7) Quoted in ‘Why Join a Church?’, by Ben Patterson, in Leadership, Fall’84, p. 80
(8) Ibid
(9) Rev. Paul Cedar, from a pamphlet entitled ‘Why Join the Church?’, from the First Presbyterrian Church of Hollywood, © 1977 Paul A. Cedar
