NEED A BOOST?
INTRODUCTION: We could all use a little more encouragement in our lives, don’t you think? We get run-down, we get disheartened. We wonder if what we’re doing really matters to anyone. We could all use a little boost every now and then. No, not the energy drink, although that might help too. But there are times when we could all use a helping hand or a pep talk. Some synonyms for “boost” are: improve, make better, advance. To give someone a boost means we are lifting them up; we are encouraging them. When we give someone a boost we are supporting them, inspiring them, motivating them. We are building them up when they are knocked down. Sound refreshing? Sound invigorating?
1) Why is encouragement so uncommon?
• Because people are jealous. I am certainly not going to encourage you when I’m jealous of your accomplishments. Also, because of my jealousy, when you fail at something I’m going to be happy. Therefore, not only will I not be encouraging, I will probably be kicking you when you’re down. In my mind you need to be taken down a peg or two. When I can tell that you’re feeling down my thoughts will be, “serves you right for thinking you’re all that.” When people are jealous, encouraging someone is probably the furthest thing from their minds.
• Because people are discouraged. One of the reasons people are discouraged is because they haven’t been encouraged very much throughout their lives. And because of this they have become pessimistic in nature. The glass is half-empty, they’re waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under them. “Things never work out for me”, “I’m such a loser”, “I hate my life; I hate myself”. It’s much harder to encourage someone else when this is my mode of thought. Why would I and how could I encourage someone else when I’m so discouraged? People who are discouraged are waiting for someone to encourage them. Therefore, one of the reasons why encouragement is so uncommon is there are too many people waiting to be encouraged and not enough people doing the encouraging.
• Because it’s easier to point out someone’s faults than their abilities. It’s easier for us to focus on what you’re doing wrong than what you’re doing right. Why? One reason is because of our unrealistic expectations. We think people should be at a certain level and when they don’t perform up to our standards we light into them. We put people on a pedestal and even put them in a perfection bubble. We see them as someone who can do no wrong but as soon as they do something wrong our bubble is burst and we attack them. That’s why we don’t point out their abilities-their abilities are not anything special to us because we’ve erroneously elevated them to an impossible status. Their faults, however, are something we feel they just shouldn’t have and we can’t understand what’s wrong with them that they would commit such foolishness. Another reason is because of our pride and ego. When I highlight your faults it can make me look better. I’m not going to encourage you, I’m going to gloat. I’m going to view your faults as a beneficial thing for me. Complimenting you would not make me look good. Highlighting your shortcomings, however, can put me in a better light. Another reason why we focus on faults more is because we view giving compliments as a negative thing. “Well, don’t start complimenting them or else they’ll start to expect a pat on the back every time they do something”. The Duke of Wellington, the British military leader who defeated Napoleon at Waterloo, was not an easy man to serve under. He was brilliant but also quite demanding and not one to shower his subordinates with compliments. Yet even Wellington realized that his methods left something to be desired. In his old age a young lady asked him what, if anything, he would do differently if he had his life to live over again. Wellington thought for a moment then replied, "I’d give more praise".
2) Why is encouragement so necessary?
• Because it can make a big difference. Prov. 12:25, “An anxious heart weighs a man down but a kind word cheers him up.” There was once a literary group that gathered at the University of Wisconsin. The members wanted to be poets, novelists and authors--and they had the talent to be successful. These young men met regularly to read and critique each other’s work. After a while, they began calling themselves the Stranglers because they were very tough in their evaluations. At the same time, a group of women formed a sister group and called themselves not the Stranglers but the Wranglers. When they read their works aloud, something much different occurred. They offered constructive suggestions tinged with positive encouragement. They erred on the side of motivation rather than mutilation. 20 years later, an alumnus studied the careers of his classmates and made a surprising discovery. Not one of the gifted male Stranglers had made a significant literary accomplishment. But at least six successful authors were former Wranglers. The Wranglers knew the difference between constructive and destructive criticism. They didn’t use flattery, they used encouragement and the results showed how much of a difference it made.
• Because it can change someone’s life. Howard Hendricks had come from a broken family and was a problem child. During his first day in fifth grade the teacher said, 'Oh, Howard Hendricks. I've heard a lot about you. I understand you are the worst kid in school.' That year Howard did whatever he could to prove her right. When the next year rolled around his sixth grade teacher said to him, 'Oh, so you are Howard Hendricks. I've heard you are the worst boy in this school.' Hendricks thought, 'Here we go again.' But then the teacher continued, 'And you know what? I don't believe it.' And Howard said that year that woman did everything she could to help him and encourage him and praise his work; she believed in him. Hendricks credits her with changing his life forever. Prov. 25:11, “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” Receiving a word of encouragement is as valuable as receiving gold and silver. William Arthur Ward said, "Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you.” Having someone believe in you can make all the difference in the world. Someone who has the ability and the willingness to see beyond the problems and see the potential. This is the type of person that changes lives.
• Because it helps people finish strong. One of the most touching moments in NBA history took place in a 2003 playoff game between the Portland Trailblazers and the Dallas Mavericks. Actually, it happened before the game began. Natalie Gilbert was a 13-year-old 8th grader who had won the chance to sing the national anthem before the game. Even though she had been in bed all day with the flu, she was determined to do her best. She was obviously nervous, and a few lines into the song, Natalie forgot the words. She stood there embarrassed in the spotlight in front the crowd and a national television audience. It had to be the most agonizing moment in Natalie’s young life - and everyone there was embarrassed for her as well. But after only a few seconds of uncomfortable silence, Maurice Cheeks, the Trailblazers head coach walked to Natalie’s side, put his arm around her and helped her with the words. They started singing together, and soon the entire crowd was singing the national anthem. His act of helping Natalie brought the entire crowd into the song. There was thunderous cheering when they all reached the words, "o'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!" Natalie messed up, but fortunately there was someone there to help her recover, and she finished strong. Wouldn't it be great if we would come along side our brothers and sisters who have messed up and help them recover spiritually so they can finish strong? Everybody messes up, even Christians. But we don't have a very good reputation for how we treat them. Someone has said that “the Christian army is the only army that shoots its wounded." That really needs to change if we are going to win battles and finish strong. Eph. 4:29, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” We are fighting in spiritual warfare and if we don’t build each other up and encourage each other to resist sin and fight the enemy there will be casualties. Heb. 3:12-14. We can help people maintain the confidence they had at first and hold onto it until the end when we are encouraging them. When our Christian brothers and sisters are discouraged because of sin and personal setbacks we can give them a boost by reminding them how much Jesus loves them and how much we care about them and want to see them persevere. We give them a boost when we help to convince them that it’s all worth it. When we remind them what they are risking by entertaining sin. When we tell them they are worth more than that and they have more to offer than that.
3) What if we don’t get it?
• It doesn’t have to debilitate us. If we are too hung up on being encouraged it could mean we are too insecure. If we aren’t affirmed in our efforts we quickly conclude the worst about ourselves. We need to be careful not to allow people to assess our values or worth; I need to look to God for that. And whether others acknowledge my abilities or not doesn’t mean I’m not doing well; it doesn’t mean I’m a failure. It doesn’t even mean no one appreciates or recognizes them. Remember; it’s difficult for us to praise another’s service and achievements. Therefore, just because it’s going unspoken doesn’t mean it’s going unnoticed.
• The power of positive thinking. Caleb and Joshua-(Num. 13:1, 26-14:38). Ten of the spies were discouraging but Joshua and Caleb maintained their encouraging attitude. The negativity of the others could’ve taken them down but they chose to believe what God had said. God said he was giving the land to them so they believed it; regardless of how things looked. Joshua and Caleb couldn’t depend on getting encouragement from others they had to rest in the encouraging words of God. They were encouraged by God instead of being discouraged by what they saw and what they heard from the others. We can think positively regardless of the situation. A child was watching his team play baseball. A man walks up and asked, "How is the game?" The child replied, "We're losing 18 to 0." The man told the child, "Oh, don't be discouraged." But he didn't expect the child's answer: "Why should I be discouraged? My team hasn't been up to bat yet!” The power of positive thinking. There were two shoe salesmen who went to a tropical island. The first shoe salesman came back with a negative attitude. He said, “It was so discouraging – NO ONE WORE SHOES! I’ll never sell shoes there.” The second salesman came back and he was all excited. He said, “What great potential! What great opportunity! NO ONE WORE SHOES! I gave away a pair of shoes to the tribal leader and he loved them. All the other tribal members want shoes now. We have a wide open market!” When we’re not being encouraged by others we can still be encouraged by the power of positive thinking.
• We can get it from scripture. Romans 15:4, “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope.” God gave us the Bible to encourage us? How does that work? One man put it this way: 1. Why should I say I can’t when the Bible says I CAN? “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength” (Phil 4:13). 2. Why should I accept being defeated in life when the Bible says that “God always leads me in triumph” (2 Corinthians 2:14)? 3. Why should I feel like I’m ignorant or uneducated, when God promises to generously give me His wisdom when I ask for it (James 1:5)? 4. Why should I worry and fret when I can cast all my anxiety on Christ who cares for me (1Peter 5:7)? 5. Why should I feel alone when God said “I will never leave you or forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5)? 6. Why should I surrender to Satan when “He that is in me is greater than he that is in the world?” (1 John 4:4)? 7. Why should I fear deprivation and loss when I know that "God shall supply all my needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19)? 8. Why should I fear at all when the Bible says “God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7)? 9. Why should I be afraid of difficult people and circumstances when the Bible declares: “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Rom 8:31), “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?” (Rom 8:35), “In all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us” (Rom 8:37)? Psalm 121. If this isn’t encouraging scripture I don’t know what is.
• We turn to Jesus. When Jesus preached the Sermon on the Mount, he started by giving them a series of encouraging blessings. Matt. 5:1-12. Jesus went on to tell them, “You are the salt of the earth. You are the light of the world”. What kind of people did he say all this to? Farmers, fishermen, tax collectors, housewives, all in a tiny remote village in an obscure part of the world. It must have sounded absurd at the time even to them. They never would’ve heard such encouraging words from their neighbors but they did hear them from Jesus. However, He wasn’t giving them flattery, he was giving them encouragement. He saw them not for what they were but for what they would become. The Puritan Richard Sibbes offers encouragement along those lines in his book The Bruised Reed. He said, "Let us not therefore be discouraged at the small beginnings of grace, but look on ourselves as elected to be 'holy and without blame' (Ephesians 1:4). ...in case of discouragement, we must consider ourselves as Christ does, who looks on us as those he intends to fit for himself. Christ values us by what we shall be, and by what we are elected unto. We call a little plant a tree, because it is growing up to be so. ...Christ would not have us despise little things." The problem with people is that we don’t have the tendency to highlight the positives. We don’t typically perceive what someone can become. We judge by outward appearance and by faults and shortcomings. Jesus, however, is the one who looks beyond all that and encourages us by telling us that he has called us to be something special and unique. We are gifted and useful. We are loved. Therefore, we are encouraged.
CONCLUSION: Keith Miller and Bruce Larson, in their book Passionate People, describe two kinds of people--"basement people" and "balcony people." "Basement people" are the discouragers in our lives. They may be people from our past, or present, but their words go with us everywhere we go. They are the negative influences in our lives and their words go something like this: "You can't do that." "That was a stupid thing to do." "When are you going to get it right?" "You’ll never amount to anything." They divert us from our hopes and dreams. They constantly point out what is wrong rather than what is right. Basement people cause a room to light up when they leave. In contrast to them are the "Balcony People." They are people who are full of love and cheer us on. They encourage us to be loving, courageous followers of Christ. They sit in the balcony of our lives like a heavenly cheering section, saying, "You can do it." "We believe in you." "You are special to us." Balcony people are the great encouragers in our lives and we all need them! Balcony people try to lift people up to where they are, but basement people try to drag people down to where they are. Are we going to be basement people or balcony people? There’s no question which one God wants us to be. Let’s go give someone a boost today.
