THE PARTNER OF PARENTHOOD
Some names are interesting because we easily recognize them without knowing anything about them except the name. Some such names are of places. For example, everyone has heard of “Timbuktu.” But do you realize that is the name of an actual town in the West African nation of Mali? A familiar person in history is Kublai Khan. But I suspect that few know that he was the founder of the Yuan Dynasty in China.
Finally there are Bible names we recognize like Jehosaphat. Folks know the name, but do you know anything else? Do you know that Jehosaphat became king of Judah in about 871BC.
Do you know the story in 2 Chronicles 20 where Moabites, Ammonites, Menunites assembled their armies to make war against Jehosaphat?
When Jehosaphat becomes aware that a great army is assembling against his kingdom, he proclaimed a fast for the nation in order for them to inquire of the Lord. So there is a great assembly in the temple in Jerusalem where Jehosaphat prays to the Lord for guidance. This scene is includes this description:
All the men of Judah, with their wives and children and little ones, stood there before the Lord. 2 Chronicles 20:13
I like that image of families standing together in the place of worship.
Today we share on “The Partner of Parenthood.” Reality is that no parent is raising his or her children alone. There ARE other sources influences upon your children: School, Friends, Media, Culture, and the church, to name a few. I love the church and today I stand as an advocate for the positive contribution the church can and will play in the process of raising children. So lets look to scripture for answers to the question: How can the church partner with parents?
THE CHURCH CAN REINFORCE BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES
Note the word reinforce. The Bible is clear that the primary people responsible for teaching scripture to children are the parents. Moses made this point as he gave instructions to the Hebrews in preparation for their conquest of the Promise Land.
6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 NIV
The church is here to reaffirm/reinforce what is to be received primarily in the home: Biblical Principles. There is so much knowledge that we want our children to have. We want them to have academic knowledge, athletic ability, knowledge of the arts, the ability to change a tire, or other information. Remember that the church is here to help you in the development of your spiritual life and in the spiritual lives of your home.
We Need Early Reinforcement
Don’t let it be said that the spiritual training you provided your children was Too Little Too Late. We need to start early in the raising of our children to teach them that Jesus loves them, that the Bible contains wisdom for life, and that they are a creation of a mighty God.
We Need Regular Reinforcement
A “steady diet” of quality food brings and maintains our physical health. Artists and Athletes know they need steady reinforcement to maintain their skills at the highest level. Likewise a “steady diet” of biblical lessons maintains our spiritual health. When spiritual and biblical reinforcement goes in decline, we fail to remain spiritually sharp.
Listen up in your home. The question “Are we going to church today?” should be asked rarely in your home. If it is, let that be a “red flag” to warn you of the dangers of sporadic learning.
THE CHURCH CAN MODEL CHRISTIAN PRINCIPLES
This is another way of saying the church can set quality examples for your kids. Faith is as much “caught” as it is “taught.” We learn a lot by seeing it put into practice.
Jesus’ closed the Sermon on the Mount with the story of houses built on 2 foundations.
The storms were identical. But house on solid foundation stood while one built on the sand fell. What did Jesus say the house on the solid foundation was like?
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. Matthew 7:24 NIV
If the church is indeed a gathering of people with a faith commitment to Jesus, the behavior of church people will model distinctions that are not as readily seen in the world. Jesus showed that Christians will face the same kind of “storms” or problems that non-Christians meet. But we can demonstrate a better, higher, response! When a Christian faces temptation, it gives the opportunity for that Christian to show how a Christian responds. When a Christian has cancer, it gives the opportunity for that Christian to show how a Christian responds to that battle. When a Christian loses his/her job, it gives the opportunity for that Christian to show how a Christian responds to that situation. When a Christian receives injustice, it gives the opportunity for that Christian to show how a Christian responds to injustice. When a Christian’s family goes through crisis, it gives the opportunity for that Chris a Christian fails, it gives the opportunity for that Christian to show how a Christian humbly admits to his/her mistakes, repents, and seeks forgiveness.
THE CHURCH CAN PROVIDE OPPORTUNITIES TO BOND AS FAMILY
Remember again the picture in 2 Chronicles 20 of God’s people gathered in His house as families: All the men of Judah, with their wives and children and little ones, stood there before the Lord. 2 Chronicles 20:13
Many things in our lives send family members in different directions. Even in church we split up to go to different age appropriate Bible Study classes. But the church also provides opportunities for families to be together and bond together. Here are a couple of ways churches do this.
Worship
Our church utilizes a blended style of worship that incorporates both praise choruses and traditional hymns. We do this because we embrace the idea of intergenerational worship as families. We believe families that worship together experience a unique spiritual bonding.
My father is a retired pastor and taught me most of what I know about preaching. But it was my mother who taught me how to worship as sat beside her in church as a young boy. She sang all the hymns and showed me how to follow the lyrics in the hymnal. I watched her open her Bible to that day’s featured scripture and occasion jot notes based on what was shared in the pulpit. Thus we share a unique spiritual bond.
Ministry
Whenever my siblings get together and reminisce about our teenage years, we inevitably recall an episode when our family was called upon to throw together on short notice a Christmas program for the residents of a local skilled care nursing home. It is a memory that still bonds us together today. Our church provides mission trip opportunities that are designed especially for families to participate in together. And parents are strongly encouraged to provide leadership to ministries that involve their children. Working in ministry together binds hearts together.
THE CHURCH CAN BE AN EXTENDED FAMILY
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:10 NIV
The one characteristic of our congregation that I want to preserve more than any other is the sense of family. We sing, I’m so glad I’m a part of the Family of God and we sometimes follow a tradition where we call each other “brother’ or “sister”.
Some in this church were surrogate grandparents, aunts, and uncles to my children. But this kind of intimacy is only possible as the church is a source of quality resources. Merely attending does not give you a sense of “family.” For this level of partnership to occur, you cannot just “go” to church, “you have to “be” the church. But when it is there, a rich and rewarding sense of family relationships occur.
THE CHURCH CAN POINT PEOPLE TO JESUS
Timothy was pointed toward faith in Jesus through the faith of his grandmother and his mother.
I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also. 2 Timothy 1:5 NIV
The church’s role is to help point the lives of children toward Jesus. Because we love our children, we protect them from dangers with a safe and comfortable home. Because we love our children we protect them from ignorance with quality education. Because we love our children we protect them from poor health with a nutritious diet. You meet these obvious needs because they clamor for our attention. But their greatest need is spiritual in nature. That is, their need for Jesus.
Yes, it is good for them to be mighty in body. It is good for them to be mighty in intellect. But unless we make them mighty in spirit, our children cannot reach their God-given potential.
Barna Research indicates that 43% of all Americans who accept Jesus Christ as their Savior do so before reaching the age of 13 and that 64% born again Christians made that commitment to Christ before their 18th birthday. Thus these formative years are a greater season of opportunity than any other time in life.
Some parents try to disregard this responsibility saying I’m not going to force my religion on my kids. But when presented with impressionable young lives, Jesus did NOT say to let them observe and make up their own mind. Instead He said, Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Mark 10:14b NIV He wanted them to know Him, to know they were special, and to bless them.
Parents who are “neutral”, who say nothing about religion in their homes are saying SOMETHING. They are saying that it is not important. They are saying that it does not really matter. But it DOES matter. The church uniquely and consistently will point your child to Jesus. The church will consistently be concerned not just with mind and body, but their soul. The church will work with you for your child’s eternal good. Therefore, it is a partnership literally made in heaven.
I close with a quote from Ruben Herring that I have kept this quote in my files for many years:
Some things just naturally go together: Ham and Eggs, House and Lot, Horse and Carriage, Love and Marriage. Add another combination: Home and Church. These two belong together because both are divine institutions. The same God who established the church had already created the family. When these two God-given institutions fulfill their purpose and function, the land is blessed. -Ruben Herring
