Introduction:
Ephesians 5: 21 say: “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” and the entire passage where this is taken from talk principally of our relation with one another – what we are expected to do to one another in the home/marital relationship.
In our homes today and in our relationship with one another, we abuse, accuse, condemn, lord, nag, quarrel, etc. with one another rather than submitting to one another.
What is submission?
Submission means surrender one’s right or will for another
Lay down one’s selfish desires for the good of the other, put the other person before self, think less of self but think of others, consider others first before self.
How then do we submit to one another in order to have a healthy home or relationship?
1. Seek to serve and not to be served
Galatians 5:13 You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. 14 The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
Mathew 20:25 Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.26Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,27and whoever wants to be first must be your slave--28just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.
Romans 15: 1 We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. 2 Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.
Philippians 2: 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 7 but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.
2. Stop trying to change each other, through - accuse, abuse, condemn, nag, lord, etc.
Matthew 7: 1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged.2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
Recognize that in any relation we are bound to offend one another, however you must not be quick to judge, condemn,
a. It never worked because It is not your responsibility to judge
Galatians 5: 14 The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."15 If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
Romans 14:13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way.
James 4: 12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you--who are you to judge your neighbor?
b. It is God through His Holy Ghost that can change or transform a person
Galatians 5: 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
3. Examine/Correct yourself
a. Search for and remove the plank in your eye
2 Corinthian 13: 5 Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you--unless, of course, you fail the test?
Matthew 7: 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
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b. Be humble and seek forgiveness from one another
Colossians 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Ephesians 4: 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
4. Seek for fresh empowerment in the Holy Ghost
a. to overcome your weakness/faults
i. never to see yourself as better than your partner,
Ephesians 5:18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.
b. increase the power of your love for your spouse/partner
i. To love your spouse as yourself
Matthew 19:19 honor your father and mother,' and 'love your neighbor as yourself.' "
ii. You will no longer see and remember his/her weakness/fault
5. Appreciate and commend
a. Appreciate one another through
i. Honoring and blessings
Romans 12: 10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Romans 12: 13 Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
ii. Praise, hymns and thanksgiving
Ephesians 5: 19 Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord,
Colossians 3: 12 Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
b. Henceforth, let your attitude be the same as that of Christ,
Philippians 2: 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Conclusion:
Enjoying a healthy family or matrimonial home or relationship where there is no rancor, bite biting, hatred, etc. is not an easy thing to come by. The price needs to be paid. Jesus Christ paid the price for which we are enjoying today. We need to pay the price by submitting to one another in the fear of the Lord. May the Lord helps us in Jesus name.
