Keys To A Good Life
Proverbs 1:8-19
Wisdom can come in strange ways.
Illus. Two men were out hunting in the northern U.S. Suddenly one yelled and the other looked up to see a grizzly charging them. The first started to frantically put on his tennis shoes and his friend anxiously asked, "What are you doing? Don't you know you can't outrun a grizzly bear?" "I don't have to outrun a grizzly. I just have to outrun you!"
I. The Importance of Home (8-9)
Proverbs 1:8-9 Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, 9 for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.
Balance is preferred (having a father and mother in a home). God created the home with a father and a mother for a reason. However, in our world, having a present mother and father is becoming the exception. And having a godly mother and a godly father is extremely rare. But that is God's plan.
Listen to the instructions of your father and the teachings of your mother. Let's look at each of these.
Teaching and instruction. Teaching, to distribute information. Instruction, to demonstrate and discipline.
"You may pay the teacher to educate, the psychologist to counsel, the coach to discipline and the pastor to instill values, but the majority of the responsibility still remains with the parents." Dennis Davidson.
Ill. In the jungles of eastern Sri Lanka, 15 soldiers of a government COMMANDO UNIT were SAVED BY TWO DOGS adopted as mascots. According to a news report, the soldiers were completing a 10 mile hike when their dogs sensed danger. Running ahead toward a water hole where the unit planned to rest, the dogs suddenly began barking and circling the area. The troops searched carefully and found 12 buried grenades attached to a taut wire trigger.
It's intriguing to think about those two jungle mascots whose senses were tuned to the smell of danger. The soldiers escaped serious injury and even death because they listened to those barking dogs.
It's disturbing to realize, however, that sometimes we are apt to give lesser credibility and attention to more faithful protectors. How many times have we resented a father's warnings or a mother's advice? How often have we grown tired of a pastor's pleadings or a fellow believers cautions?
Parents and grandparents, how many times have we failed to be as faithful to our God-given responsibilities as a barking dog.
Our parents' instructions add beauty to our lives (graceful garland of honor). The pendant or chain about our necks also represent beauty, but also that which brings great delight to children. Though teachings, instructions, and discipline from parents and grandparents may seem grievous for the moment, they will be a source of great delight if heeded. Such were those worn by one who was prized and valued.
A valued child is one who is cared for enough to be corrected and taught. It is an honor to obey parents because it proves your value. Truly, it will be a beautiful garland on your head and gold chain about your neck. A garland was also a reward for an athletic win.
Illus. Charlie Sheen in his rebellious, sinful living may proclaim himself to be "Winning", but his lifestyle, choices and eternal destiny will point to forever "Losing".
Mat_16:26 For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?
If your friend does not like your parents, or your parents do not approve of your friends, that is a strong warning of wisdom.
Before I pass from this thought, we must recognize that every home situation is not ideal. Some parents are facing the reality of raising their children alone, without a partner, and are tired of hearing that it takes two. There is nothing more hopeless than being told something is not right but there is nothing health you can do about it.
Some of our young people are being raised with one parent and that is absolutely not their fault and is beyond their control. If you are in one of these less-than-ideal situations, there is still hope. Your situation is no surprise to God and His grace will not fall short.
Psalm 68:5 promises, "Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation." God can supply what you are missing in your home. Wives, he can make up for the absent or absentee father. Husbands, He can compensate for the absent or unfaithful wife. Children, He can be your loving Father or the supply from the missing Mother. God's grace is beyond sufficient for you, but only if you commit fully to Him.
II. The Call of the Wild (10-14)
Illus. When Mike Wood began to advertise his SIGN COMPANY, he didn't know how useful his work would become. Some of his signs were life-size cardboard pictures of kids, which he put close to the street. Besides advertising his business, the signs had another effect. Motorists thought the cutouts were real children and began to drop their speed. Now Mike sells the cardboard kids to parents who want to slow down speeding drivers in their area. Mike said, "We truly hope that some of our standups help to control speeding in neighborhoods around the country."
Parents work at protecting their children from physical danger. But there are other dangers as well. Peers can be very destructive in someone's life.
Proverbs 1:10-14 "My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent. 11 If they say, "Come with us, let us lie in wait for blood; let us ambush the innocent without reason; 12 like Sheol let us swallow them alive, and whole, like those who go down to the pit; 13 we shall find all precious goods, we shall fill our houses with plunder; 14 throw in your lot among us; we will all have one purse""
Most of us would love to believe that having a few bad friends wouldn't hurt us. I just want to add that the one who designed us and who understands us better than we understand ourselves says, "Do not be deceived: "Bad company ruins good morals." 1 Corinthians 15:33.
Verse 10 could read, "Dear son, if one of your friends tries to influence you to do bad, resist him." When someone does something wrong, they want company. When someone starts drinking, they want to share it with their friends. When a person starts to smoke pot or do drugs, they want all of their friends to join. When someone begins to do immoral things on dates, they feel better about themselves if they can get all their buddies to commit the same sins.
This loving father, in teaching his son, said, "Son, learn to say no to your friends." Learn to stand alone.
Verse 11 implies that everybody is doing it. This will make you part of the "in" crowd. The language seems overly dramatic here for a purpose. The bad company always promises more than sin can deliver. The sin always causes more damage than first appears. It is fitting that such murderous words are used in describing the sin. This confirms the theme: Sin takes you further than you want to go, keeps you longer than you want to stay and costs you more than you want to pay. Jesus pointed out that even anger, hate, bitterness, jealousy and rebellion was committing murder in your heart. Ref. Mark 7:21. Even the rebellious attitude our bad friends espouse are poison for our souls.
The invitation may not sound like "Come with us, let us lie in wait for blood; let us ambush the innocent without reason; 12 like Sheol let us swallow them alive, and whole, like those who go down to the pit;". But the writer/father was just wanting to show the evil as it stands against rightness.
Verse 13 sounds more like how it will be presented. "we shall find all precious goods, we shall fill our houses with plunder".
"It will be awesome," they say. "Awesome and satisfying. We will have a real good time."
"And we will be family," it says in verse 14. " throw in your lot among us; we will all have one purse". Lots has changed from my generation being a teen and the teens today, but temptation looks the same.
III. Wisdom' Plea (15-19)
Proverbs 1:15-19 "my son, do not walk in the way with them; hold back your foot from their paths, 16 for their feet run to evil, and they make haste to shed blood. 17 For in vain is a net spread in the sight of any bird, 18 but these men lie in wait for their own blood; they set an ambush for their own lives. 19 Such are the ways of everyone who is greedy for unjust gain; it takes away the life of its possessors."
When we go along with the crowd and refuse to listen to the truth, our own appetites will become our masters and we will do what ever is necessary to satisfy them. Sin, no matter how attractive, is deadly. So in verse 15 the wise father appeals to his son to make right choices, which means steering clear of people who want to entice us into activities we know are wrong. "my son, do not walk in the way with them; hold back your foot from their paths."
2 Corinthians 6:14-17 "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? 16 What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 17 Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you,
Any loving parent will tell you, don't walk on the path with a wicked person. This means choosing friends who will help you do right, not do what is wrong.
He reminds us that a friend may be dangerous because they are unthinking or not careful. Pro 1:16 says, "...for their feet run to evil, and they make haste to shed blood." The implication of running is going before thinking. Making haste is not planning or being careful.
This could even apply to riding with that friend who has been drinking. There is no intent to shed blood, but they run into it before they know it.
Wisdom's plea then shifts. "Don't be a bird brain." 17-18 "For in vain is a net spread in the sight of any bird, 18 but these men lie in wait for their own blood; they set an ambush for their own lives."
He is saying, even a bird is smart enough to avoid a trap if he watches being set and baited. Be smarter than a bird. These men are setting a trap for themselves. Don't be dumb enough to join them. Find good friends and don't pal with bad friends.
He then finishes this passage with a thought. If you are too anxious to win without paying the price, it takes part of you away. If you want to cheat, you kill something inside. You want to profit on the backs of others, something inside you dies. "Such are the ways of everyone who is greedy for unjust gain; it takes away the life of its possessors."
One last thought concerning friends. There is never an excuse hate someone. Sometimes Christian friends have determined they have a friend who is unhealthy and they dump them. That is not what Christ would do or what the father is telling his son in these proverbs.
We realize that there are different levels of friends. You want to have an influence on friends of all types. You want to be a missionary to those who would influence you for wrong, but put in some safeguards.
Jesus was called a friend of sinners. They didn't influence Him. He influenced them. But Jesus inner circle were those who sought God's purpose.
1. Make sure your inner circle is composed of friends who will support your Christian walk.
2. Make sure you influence all of your friends, no matter how close, for good.
3. Resist friends who are always trying to get you to be rebellious.
4. Most of the time, if you stand for Jesus Christ and always try to be a positive influence for Him, many of the wrong friends will drop you.
Illus. Sometimes true friends don't just affirm and comfort us; they also "raise our game." That's what happened to Richard Dahlstrom when he was rock climbing with his friend Kevin. Kevin, a more experienced climber, was climbing as the belayer, or the one who's supposed to protect Dahlstrom from plummeting to the ground. On this particular climb, Dahlstrom was exhausted and ready to quit the climb, so he politely asked Kevin to help him get back to the ground. But Kevin refused to grant his friend's request. Here's how Dahlstrom described the scene:
"Falling," I shout, and Kevin puts a brake on the rope; after a few feet I come to stop. I'm hanging, spinning around while new blood delivers recovery energy to my fingers and my spent arm. "I'm done, man. Lower!" This the part where the belayer is supposed to lower you to the ground and congratulate you on a good try.
Instead, Kevin says, "I'm not lowering ya, man. You can climb that."
"Funny," I say, acknowledging his attempt at humor. "Lower, please."
"Not funny," he says, laughing. "You. Can. Climb. That." He speaks in staccato, punctuating each word to make sure I hear him. I continue to spin, hanging from the rope, about forty-five feet in the air. "Try it again."
Who is this person, telling me what I can and can't do? Friends don't let friends dangle in midair, do they? What did I ever like about him? "No, really. I'm finished."
"No, really. You can climb this." He's not going to let me quit. I need new friends.
I reconnect with the rock, and he tightens the rope as I try again, and fall again. Once more I ask to be lowered. Once more he refuses. Once more I try, and this last time, for reasons still unknown to me, I succeed and finish the climb, exhilarated by the triumph ….
Kevin saw something in me I didn't and brought it out; he raised my game, so to speak. Good friends do that; so do good coaches. But more than friends or coaches, God does that. God raises our game and brings things out in us that we didn't know were there.
