PROVERBS 10: 11-14, 18-21, 31-32
THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK
These verses address the subject of talking. Speech is one of the most distinguishing gifts of man. The faculty of speech offers immense influence either for good or evil. It is the principle channel by which we will affect people and the world. It is by speech that we communicate our thoughts to each other, carry on business, and improve our knowledge and learning.
We have the glorious privilege to choose our words. This privilege is one of the main reasons we are to gain wisdom. The righteous speak wise words. Thus they are fitting or appropriate (Prov. 10:14) and give life to people and situations. [It's not the duration of your life that counts. It's the devotion of your life—how intense you are in serving the Lord and giving yourself to Him that matters.]
We are going to skip our way through the rest of the verses in Chapter 10 that deal with speech. These verses helps us see and understand by contrasting right behavior with wrong behavior, the right use of speech with the wrong use of speech.
I. Some Contrasts of the Righteous and the Wicked, 11-12.
II. Some Results of Refusing Wisdom, 13-14.
III. Some Proper and Wrong Uses of Speech, 18-21.
IV. Some Words of Wisdom / Discernment, 31-32.
Verse11 helps us understand interpersonal relations and distinguish between people better. "The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, But the mouth of the wicked conceals violence."
The righteous speak wise words. The words of a righteous (and wise) person are like a fountain of life (13:14; 14:27; 16:22; also note 18:4). His good, pure, vigorous words of wisdom are as refreshing as a cool spring to a weary desert traveler. The words of the righteous are a source of life-giving spiritual vitality. Words of truth and love are the means by which God refreshes and pour life into the souls of people.
There is no true peace in the words of those full of strife. Violence overwhelms their mouth. Since the word for "overwhelms" can be translated "covers" (as it is in v. 12), the idea is either that his mouth conceals or deceptively hides violence (niv), or that violence characterizes what a person says. Jesus stated, "The evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart" (Luke 6:45).
What motivates you, anger or truth, hatred or love, folly or wisdom?
The strong contrast is made again in verse12. "Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all transgressions."
Hatred results in dissension (6:14) because people who despise each other can hardly work or live together in peace. The stirring or raising up of dissensions suggests the gossip (6:19b) who is hated by Yahweh (6:16-19). If you hate someone you look for excuses to bad mouth him or start in on him. This fiend is at work everywhere, in homes, offices, politics and churches. It is like a subterraneous fire that smolders out disgusts, dislikes, envyings, coldness and selfishness.
Love contributes toward peace because it covers or forgives the faults of others (17:9). It does not dwell on those faults (1 Cor. 13:5; James 5:20; 1 Peter 4:8). The Hebrew word translated "covereth" is kacah, which means "to overwhelm" (Proverbs 10:6, 11). A wicked one's words are covered over with violence, but a righteous person covers up wrongs by forgiving the wrongdoers. When we see shortcomings in others, the solution is to overwhelm them with love. For we who have been forgive so much must forgive others (Col. 3:18).
A promoter of strife magnifies the faults of other (and we all have them). If you love someone, you give them the benefit of the doubt. If you hate someone, you don't. Love covers a multitude of sins [Prov 17:9; 1 Cor 13:4–7; James 5:20; 1 Pet 4:8].
The message of Jesus is simple yet astounding: Love your enemies. Do good to those who mistreat you. Repay evil with kindness. When Christians live by these principles, he will keep his heart free of hatred no matter, how others feel toward him.
Steve Estes reported a remarkable example of this in the Wyclffe Bible Translator. In January 1981, Colombian rebels kidnaped Chet Bitterman, shot him, and left his body in a hijacked bus. Imagine how his parents and loved ones must have felt at the senseless death of this young man!
But in April 1982 as a demonstration of international good will, the churches and civic groups of Bitterman's native area, Lancaster County Pennsylvania gave an ambulance to the state of Meta in Colombia, where the young linguist was killed.
Bitterman's Parents traveled to Colombia for the presentation of the ambulance. At the ceremony his mother explained, " We are able to do this because God has taken the hatred from our hearts."
This is the power of Christ in action! When we are wronged and ill will begins turning to hatred in our hearts, We need to ask God to change us and enable us to show kindness to the one who has wronged us This is the way to turn hatred in love.
II. Some Results of Refusing Wisdom, 13-14.
These statements contrast the wise and the fool. Wisdom is on the lips of the one who understands, but a chastisement comes to the rebellious. Verse 13, "On the lips of the discerning, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks understanding."
While the discerning person is characterized by his wise statements, one lacking judgment (21; 6:32; 7:7; 9:4, 16; 11:12; 12:11; 15:21; 17:18; 24:30; 28:16) experiences trouble. He may be punished by a rod on the back (14:3; 26:3).
Because the mouth speaks from the abundance of the heart (Matthew 12:34), it is not surprising that the wise man speaks wisely. On the other hand, the foolish man unknowingly makes himself a target for the rod of correction. Look no further than Solomon's son King Rehoboam to find one whose back needed the rod of correction because of his lack of wisdom. Learn to seek wisdom from the lips of the wise, for the lack of a willingness to seek wisdom will eventually result in punishment (1 Pet. 2:20).
Again in verse 14 the righteous man is contrasted with the wicked, or foolish man and the picture is that of knowledge and instruction versus destruction and error. Solomon couldn't have made the contrast more clear. "Wise men store up knowledge, But with the mouth of the foolish, ruin is at hand."
A wise person is diligent to store up knowledge. He treasures it by letting it teach him without spouting it off inappropriately. What a fool says, however, causes him trouble and eventually ruin because he foolishly speaks the wrong things and gets himself in trouble (Prov 10:8, 10; 19; 13:3; 18:7; Rom 9:22).
III. Some Proper and Wrong Uses of Speech, 18-21.
Verse 18 teaches us to beware of liars and slanders. "He who conceals hatred has lying lips, and he who spreads slander is a fool.
Wicked people hide their wickedness and hatred with lies. God hates slanderers for they murder reputations. They are scoundrels and villains with hidden hatred in their hearts and deceit in their mouths.
Some people have turned slander into a fine art. They would never use a meat cleaver to cut down another person. They are shrewder "hit men" than that. They have learned to slander with a gesture, a wink, an evil smile, or a tale.
[Jonathan Swift, who knew well the ugliness of slander, described. a man who could "convey a libel in"a frown and wink a reputation down." And Robert Lewis Stevenson noted the cruelest lies are often told in silence conversation, the listeners can join the mugging with a nod.
The writers of the Proverbs described people, in the ancient world who used their body language to destroy others. They winked., motioned, or gave a shrug to work their slander, and they felt safe in their attacks. After all, it is difficult to refute a gesture or to prove evil in a wink. Their actions were subtle, but as deadly as bullets piercing the heart.]
Do you need to ask the God of love and truth to help you guard your speech and gestures today? Then for His sake, for your own sake, and for the sake of others, do it!
Be careful with your tongue it's in a wet place and can easily slip. Lord, purge our hearts from these hidden hateful corruptions!
Verse 19 trumpets out the wisdom of restraint and silence. "When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise.
Many have spoken volumes of words, but their words were void of God's wisdom.
We love to hear ourselves talk and present our own understandings. Unfortunately, the more we speak, the more vulnerable we are to sin, and the more likely it is we'll say something we wish we hadn't said. Therefore, I believe it would do each of us well to listen more and speak less (Prov 17:27; James 1:19; 3:2). James said, "Be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath" (James 1:19).
The more you say, the more opportunities you have to say the wrong thing. There are a few times when, after the conversation I regretted not saying something that I wanted to say. But there are so many more times when I wished I hadn't said something I said. We would almost always be better off if we said less. For it is not safe for a man or woman to open their lips and pour out words with out selection or restraint.
LAWYER James E. Watson used to tell about an amusing incident in one of his first trials. He was representing an uneducated woman who was very nervous about the verdict. Although Mr. Watson wasn't especially worried; he couldn't allay his client's fears. In fact, she kept asking him to get a second attorney so they would have two lawyers as her opponent had. "Mary; why on earth do you want another lawyer?" asked Mr. Watson. "Well on their side" said Mary," when one is talkin' the other's a thinkin', while on our side when your are talkin' no one's a-thinkin'."
That woman may have been a little mixed up about how lawyers defend their clients, but she was right about one thing. She knew that thinking and speaking should always go hand in hand.
The old saying "Think before you speak" makes a lot of sense, If we observed it all spare ourselves many embarrassing situations. But all too often- we speak before we think. As a result we monopolize conversations, we babble on and on - especially, when we have nothing worthwhile to say.
As image-bearers of God, we have the, unique ability to think and to use words. The gift or speech, has been given to us to encourage and to bless others. So let's be sure to think before we speak. Make sure you mind is runnin' before you put your mouth in gear.
[At amusement parks, the BUMPER-CAR ride is always popular. People enjoy driving recklessly for a few minutes, bumping deliberately but harmlessly into other people's cars.
Some people have a bumper-car mentality in their relationships with others. Using blunt words, they deliberately bump into others' feelings, which is anything but harmless.
Solomon wrote, "He who restrains his lips is wise" (Proverbs 10:19). But James said, "No man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison" (James 3:8). He said that with the tongue we bless our God who created us, but we also curse those whom He has created (v.9). Lest we think that Christians do the blessing and non-Christians do the cursing, we need to remember that James was writing to Christians.
To tame our tongues, we need God's help. In Romans 6:13, Paul said that we need to make a choice-to present the parts of our body "as instruments of righteousness to God," not "as instruments of unrighteousness to sin."] To bridle your tongue, give God the reins of your heart.
The tongue I would guess is responsible for more harm than any other member of the body. That's why we must learn to watch our words before we speak.
A woman developed a serious throat condition and was told that her vocal cords needed total rest. She wasn't to talk for 6 months! With a husband and six children, this seemed impossible, but she cooperated. When she needed the children, she blew a whistle. She wrote out instructions and answers to questions on slips of paper.
The 6 months finally passed, and she recovered. Her observations were revealing. She said, "I don't think I'll ever shout like I used to." When asked about the notes, she commented, "You'd be surprised how many, written nastily or in anger, I crumpled up and threw into the wastebasket before anyone could see them. Seeing my words kept me from saying many of them."
Whether we join in at coffeebreak, talk on the telephone, or converse with our neighbors, let's remember that "in: the multitude of words sin is not lacking." If a morsel of gossip or an unkind remark comes to mind, pray, "Lord, help me see the harm it could do. Help me watch both the quality and the quantity of my words.
The speech of a righteous man is valuable. Verse 20, "The tongue of the righteous is as choice silver, the heart of the wicked is worth little.
Chose silver is bright, pure, and non-corrosive [once used for surgery knives]. Words from a just person are valuable. His words have value because he has reflected on the way and word of the Creator.
The wicked man's words are worth little because they pump from a corrupted heart, that refuses to yield to Jesus and be transformed.
A lot of the advice we receive is less than worthless. It's easy to get opinions from people who will tell us what our flesh wants to hear. A truck load of such advise is worthless and keeps us from seeking people who speak truth. Who do you listen to for advice?
In verse 21 we learn that the speech of a just man is nourishing but the conversation of fools deadens. "The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of understanding."
Having found righteousness from feeding on the Lord's words, they can now feed others. They that have been discipled at the feet of the Lord can now break the Bread of Life given to them and share it with others. If it is His blessed bread, it can feed and satisfy a multitude. (Prov 5:23; Hos 4:6). How the righteous can nourish and invigorate others through words of truth and love!
Fools though have chosen to feed on the fair of the world. Their lack of understanding (lit heart) is seen in their refusal to sit at the feet of Jesus.
IV. Some Words of Wisdom / Discernment, 31-32.
Proverbs 10:31 & 32 address the subject of talking. "The mouth of the righteous flows with wisdom, but the perverted tongue will be cut out. (32) The lips of the righteous bring forth what is acceptable, But the mouth of the wicked what is perverted."
Here it is stated who has the ability to sprout or bear the fruit of wisdom. The righteous, they sprout or bring forth wisdom meaning they know how to communicate that which is truly good and suitable for the intended end.. They can unriddle difficult complications and discern the right way to proceed.
Verse 32 indicates that the just person knows what to say, that which is fitting or appropriate and is able to say it so that it is met with acceptance. As a tree naturally brings forth fruit so wise words are a natural result of uprightness (Luke 6:43-45). Brings forth is literally, "bears fruit." As a tree naturally brings forth fruit so wise words are a natural result of uprightness (Luke 6:43-45). Thus they are fitting or appropriate (Prov. 10:14). The perverted's (those turned away from truth) speech is deceitful.
Perverse, used in both verses 31 and 32, means to be turned away from what is normal (2:12).
You would think we would learn early in life to measure our words before we say them; to listen to them twice in our mind before we say them once. The results can be catastrophic if we don't. Words cut to the core of who we are, and a lot of damage can be created in a hurry when our tongue runs at a high RPM.
Here are some guidelines for measuring your words:
Don't be hasty- think about what's necessary. We're taught never to turn a power tool on unless we know exactly what it is going to do when the blade starts turning. Consider the effect of what you're about to say.
Don't exaggerate. Don't use words like "always" and "never". Save yourself some grief with your spouse and don't say, "You always do this" or "You never do that."
Check your volume. Screaming and yelling to make your point may make you feel better in the short-run but it will give you more to be sorry for later and cause damage that another may never get over.
Always ask yourself: Do my words generally give life and build-up, or do they tear others down? [Hugh Poland in The Master Carpenter]
[Which of the above guidelines should I put to use during a difficult discussion?]
IN CONCLUSION
The change of speech comes from the change of heart. Jesus alone can change your heart. "How can you being evil speak good things?" Ask God to give you a new heart. Only then can you love and speak words that have eternal value.
Then- let only thoughts that bless dwell in your heart and mind. Silence your lips and tongue to all that wounds or is unkind. Every day, choose to present your body including your unruly tongue-as a living sacrifice to God (Romans 12:2) to be used by Him as an instrument of blessing.
Dear Father, forgive me for the harm I've done with my words. Set a watch upon my lips and control my tongue. Help me evaluate each thought and guard each word I say. May I use my words to encourage my family, friends, coworkers, and church members. Amen.
