Grandpa John was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. "Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now." The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime. "Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk."
Love is a many splendored thing and it’s at the center of what we’re talking about today. In honor of Valentine’s day we’re going to be looking at the story of Isaac and Rebekah. People find love in different ways and while Genesis 24 tells one, consider the way described by Ravi Zacharias in a poem.
Slippery ice, very thin,
Pretty girl tumbles in,
Saw a boy on the bank,
Gave a shriek, then she sank.
Boy on hand, heard her shout,
Jumped right in, pulled her out.
Now she’s his, very nice.
But she had to break the ice.
If you didn’t get it I’ll explain it to you later. We’re talking today about love and marriage. But as we look at the story of Isaac and Rebekah we’re also toing to see some elements that are important for a Christian to make a decision. You see the story of Issac and Rebekah is a way to find a spouse, a way that we’re going to see is foreign to our western mind. However we are also going to see within the story elements that we need to make decisions in our lives, characteristics of the people that we need to align ourselves with, and for those of us who are married the things that we should appreciate about our spouses.
Genesis 24:34-51, “So he said, ‘I am Abraham’s servant. The LORD has blessed my master abundantly, and he has become wealthy. He has given him sheep and cattle, silver and gold, menservants and maidservants, and camles and donkeys. My master’s wife Sarah has borne him a son in her old age, and he has given him everything he owns. And my master made me swear an oath, and aid, ‘You must not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I live, but go to my father’s family and to my own clan, and get a wife for my son.’ Then I asked my master, ‘what if the woman will not come back with me?’ ‘He replied, ‘The Lord, before whom I have walked, will send his angel with you and make your journey a success, so that you can get a wife for my son from my own can and from my father’s family. Then, when you go to my clan, you will be released from my oath even if they refuse to give her to you-you will be released from my oath.’ ‘When I came to the spring today, I said, ‘OP LORD< God of my master Abraham, if you will, please grant success to the journey on which I have come. See, I am standing beside this spring; if a maiden comes out to draw water and I say to her, ‘Please let me dring a litlle water from your jar.” and if she says to me, ‘Drink, and I’ll draw water for your camels too,’ let her be the one the LORD has chosen for my master’s son.’ Before I finished praying in my heart, Rebekah came out, with her jar on her shoulder. She went down to the spring and drew water, and I said to ehr, ‘please give me a drink.’ She quickly lowered her jar from her shoulder and said, ‘Dringk, and I’ll water your camels too.; So I drank, and she watered the camels also. I asked her, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ She said, ‘The daughter of Bethuel son of Nahor, whom Milcah bor to him.’ Then I put the ring in her nose and the bracelets on her arms, and I bowed down and worshiped the LORD. I praise the LORD< the God of my master Abraham, who had led me on the right road to get the granddaughter of my master’s brother for his son. Now if you will show kindness and faithfulness to my master, tell me; and if not, tell me, so I may know which way to turn.’ Laban and Bethuel answered, ‘This is from the LORD; we can say nothing to you one way or the other. Here is REbekah; take her and go, and let her become the wife of your master’s son, as the LORD has directed.”
This story is different for those of us in a western culture because the setting is different. This is the story of how Isaac found his wife. You’ll remember that Isaac was the son that God gave to Abraham and Sarah in their old age. God promised to not only give them a son but to make a nation out of their descendants. Now we are coming to the end of their story. In fact Sarah has already died and Abraham to quote verse 1 “was now old and well advanced in years.” God has been with him through all of his life. He has seen God be faithful. But now as the end is coming He wants to see his son married, he probably would like to see the birth of that first grand child.
So he calls in a man who is identified in this passage as, “the chief servant or steward, in his household.” He makes tis man swear that he will find a wife for Isaac from the land that Abraham came from. I want you to see what Abraham is doing here. He is providing for the future, he is involving God in the process, and He is turning to another Godly person who has earned his trust.
See most commentators and extrabiblical sources agree that the person refered to as that chief steward was a man named, Eliezer. This man has been with Abraham for years and has served him faithfully. Abraham is showing wisdom in this process by not only including God but turning to a person that has earned his trust.
A couple of things for us to notice. First we’re not used to the concept of an arranged marriage, but thaty is what this is, it fit the culture of the day. As we’re looking at this we’re seeing literally the patriarch of our faith, show not just how to pick a wife for your son, but how a Godly person makes a wise decision. See as we look at this passage the main theme that we see is wisdom for a marriage relationship, but along the way we see wisdom for living and wisdom for making decisions. For some reason there are some people that we meet who think that when it comes to love, when it comes to matters of the hear, you suspend reason and turn things over to emotion. Listen emotion does play a role in love, but it’s not the only thing.
When it comes to love when it comes to big decisions, it pays to have respect for the Godly people in your life, who love you and care about you. You need to be willing to listen to them. I know they’re not infalible, sometimes they even get it very wrong. My mother only tried to introduce me to one girl as a potential date. Since I didn’t get married until I was 25 I commend her for her restraint. However the one that she tried to introduce me to, swing and a miss. Our personalities we’re even close to a match. Besides, I knew my type right? I dated almost all 6 ft blondes who played volleyball that was my type, right. You’re laughing because I married a 5’ 4” Asian girl, how did that happen. Real simple parants, and others in my life taught me that my type wasn’t a physical description, it was a person. I married a girl who believed in God like I did, who loved God like I did, who had goals in life that matched mine, and who could make me laugh. That was my type. When you’re making descisions look beyond the surface, pay attention to what is really important and listen to wise, Godly people, who love you that God has placed in your life.
But let’s talk about Eliezer for a moment. When we are told this man’s name it is when God is giving Abraham the promise of a son. Abraham is saying he is childless and he is going to have to leave all that he has to his chief steward. Do you understand what the birth of Isaac meant to this man. He was the heir and now Isaac is the heir. He could have been bitter but instead he has love for his master and his son. You’ll understand that Abraham had raised him from slave to basically a family member. We see him acting out of love for Isaac and Abraham while depending on God. As we’ve seen God moming in Abraham’s life this would be consistent with how he has lived his life for Abraham to make him the chief steward.
There is a another lesson to be learned here. Many times we want God to give us things, to advance our carrer and responsiblities. But that isn’t ususally the way that God works. This man had been faithful as a servant, faithful as the steward of the household. Now think of what he is getting to do, he is getting to pick a wife for Isaac. Her children are going to form the nation of Israel. I know that the promise was given to Abraham and Sarah, but they only had one son. So His wife was it. This was a big responsiblity, but as with everything that we do for God it was also a big priviledge. This man was faithful in the little things and God blessed him with more and more bigger things. But what about Isaac what do we see from him? Trust, his Godly father sent out a Godly servant to fulfill an appropraite role and find a wife for him, and he let them do it. The lesson for us is that when faced with big decisions we need to be willing to let other Godly people play the role that God has assigned them. In that culture it was appropriate for his father to select his wife. It was appropriate for Abraham to give his authority and responsiblity to his steward. They were fulfilling their Godly roles and Isaac let them. God puts people in our lives to guide us, to teach us, to help us. If we want God’s best for our lives we need to let them play those roles.
So Abraham gives the steward this task, he sends him out. The steward prays. Understand the urgency of this prayer, he has to select a wife for his masters son. Oh by the way he has to go all the way back to where his master came from. You understand this would probably be a place he’d never been before. So he doesn’t know anyone, he doesn’t know the customs, he’s got nothing except a huge responsiblity...and God. How hard do you think he was praying? But listen to this prayer, because it’s not only fervent, it’s wise. Verse 12, “Then he prayed, ‘O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindess to my master Abraham. See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. May it be that when I say to a girl, ‘Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too’ - let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindess to my master.”
This was a wise prayer. It’s not just that he is praying to God fervently but he is asking for something. There is a character trait that he is looking for. He is looking for kindness. He is asking for it from God, but he also wants to see it in the girl that he is going to select for Isaac. See any girl in that culture could have been asked to draw water for him, but he was asking someone to go the extra mile and do more. They wouldn’t be doing it because of who he was, he was a stranger and a servant, they would simply do it because of kindness.
When you’re looking at the people you’re going to have be involved in your life is this a trait that you look for. It doesn’t matter if it is a dating relationship, marriage, business or friendship. Are they kind? An important character trait in a Christian relationship is a kindness that reflects the love of God. If someone is really walking with Christ, then they will be marked by the things of Christ and kindness is one of those things. Oh this person really loves me, they just treat me badly and ignore me all the time. Nope, their not into you or their not into God, or both. Remember the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy peace, kindness. I mean it’s number 4 on the list. If someone is walking with God, if the Spirit of God is in them, then kindness is going to be in them as well.
So this is a a wise prayer. When you’re making a big decision let the people that God has placed around you play the roles that God has given them. If it’s in a relationship, look for kindness. That’s what Eliezer did and look at how God moved. Verse 15, “Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milcha, who was the wife of Abraham’s brother Nahor. The girl was very beautifu, a virgin; no man had ever lain with her. She went down to the spring, filled her jar and came up again. The servant hurried to meet her and aid, ‘Please give me a little water from your jar.’ ‘Drink, my lord,’ she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a dring. After she had given him a drink, she said, ‘I’ll draw water for your camels too until they have finished drinking.”
God doesn’t often answer this quickly, but in this story it seems like he does. Did I mention that Isaac was 40 when this happened. i mean, his parents had him when they were older and then they had to wait another 40 years. This was a quick answer to a long term prayer. But the desire for Isaac to find a wife, the first step to have children started with Abraham and Sarah. You understand the the covenent that God gave them, the answer to their desires, was not to have a child but to have descendents.
So the steward goes, he prays, he puts a very specific prayer before the Lord, looking for kindness in a girl and BAM there she is. It’s going great, but God is providing something else in Rebekah, there is another trait that is mentioned here, that wasn’t in the prayer, but he was definately looking for it. We know this because of how it is mentioned in the language used. Verse 16 says, “The girl was very beautiful, a virgin; no man had ever lain with her.” See the word that we translate as virgin meant pure. So the author added the words, “no man had ever lain with her” to be sure that this was noted. In other words she was pure.
This is a big point not just for marriage but for life. God is holy and He desires us as His people to be pure and holy. When you accept Christ into your life your body becomes the temple of God. He dwells with you this is where you meet with Him. See it’s not just about Sunday but about everyday of your life that is when God wants to be with you. 1 Corinthians 6:19 asks, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”
Understand the huge change that took place in our relationship with God in the pages of the Bible. During the Exodus when God wanted to be with His people He gave them instructions on how to build a tabernacle in the wilderness, that they could know His presence was there. But now that Christ has come, now that our sins have been paid for, since we have been bought with a price, now things are different. God doesn’t just dwell in a building, He dwells within each of us. His disire is for His people to be pure, because He wants to be with us and God can not look at sins. You underant the imagry then as the New Testament authors begin to call us the bride of Christ. He wants us to keep our relationship with Him pure as we would our marriage. Also if we want our marriage relationship to be a reflection of the ultimate beauty of our relationship with God we must keep ourselves pure. It is in what we do, what we think, what we say all of it. Our body is a temple of the Lord we need to keep it pure in honor of the One who dwells with us there.
So Isaac let Godly people play the roles God gave them, there was a fleece before the Lord in an act of kindness, the girl that God sent was pure. But then also she was ready, we need to be ready when God wants to move in our lives. You’ll notice how quick this moves on her end. Yeah, for Abraham, it was years before he had a son, this is 40 years after that. So for Abraham this is a long term prayer, but we don’t know how long it’s been for her but I’m sure it felt like BAM! To her. The thing is that she was ready.
You think the steward is having a stressful day, how wierd is hers? She goes down to get water for the family, she’s doing her chores basically. Some random guy walks up and asks her for water. She’s nice enough to not only give him water, but also his camels, do you know how much water a camel can drink? Suddenly he’s giving her a gold nose ring, and gold bracelets, he’s talking about some guy named Abraham and asking to spend the night. The next thing you know her family is willing to give her away in marriage and she goes. This is a whirlwind. Sometimes it can feel that way when God moves in our lives. But God has always known His plan for us. He has known the timing, when we would be ready and what we can handle. If we want God’s best for our lives we have to be ready to move when he wants and we have to surround ourselves by people who are also ready to move. When the time came Rebekah was ready to go, her family was ready to move, Abraham was ready when he felt it was time, and the steward moved when he was told. We need to be ready when God moves and we need to be with people who are ready to move.
There is one other thing that we see in this story though. Skip to the end of the chapter. The steward has gone in, as we read he explains everything to her family, they agree that this must be of God. They ask if she wants to wait, she says, “nope let’s go.” That’s a paraphrase but pretty close to the attitude, but then look at the first time she sees Isaac. Here we see that attitude that can find success be it in a marriage or in any other decision in life. Look at verse 62, “Now Isaac had come from Beer Lahai Roi, for he was living in the Negev. He went out to the field one evening to meditate, and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel and asked the servant, ‘Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?” ‘He is my master,’ the servan answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.”
When Rebekah first sees Isaac what is he doing? He’s praying. That’s what that word translated as meditating means. He was praying, he was seeking God’s wisdom. That’s where success in anything starts with prayer. So here is the principle that we’ve seen all the way through this chapter. When it comes to the big decisions in life we need to not only be people of prayer but also surround ourselves with people of prayer.
Isaac was a man of prayer, Abraham was a person of prayer, the steward prayed. Are you a person of prayer? This is so important to our lives. We know this about marriage, that communication is the key, are you keeping the lines of communication with God open. Before you make big decisions, be it with dating our marriage, relationships or any other thing are you turning to God in prayer? You should be, because no one can give you better advice or help then God.
Message Notes – Sunday February 12th, 2012
“I Isaac Take Your Rebekah”
Genesis 24
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25
1. When faced with big decisions we need to be willing to let other Godly people play the role that God has assigned them.
2. An important character trait in a Christian relationship is a kindness that reflects the love of God.
3. Our body is the temple of the Lord we need to keep it pure in honor of the One who dwells with us there.
4. We need to be ready when God wants to move in our lives.
5. We need to not only be people of prayer but also surround ourselves with people of prayer.
