I Am the Worst of Sinners
Pastor Daniel J. Little
The Landmark Church, Binghamton, NY
adfontes.dj@gmail.com
Scripture Reading
Romans 7:18-25
18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.
21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. 22 For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, 23 but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. 24 Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. ESV
1 Timothy 1:15-17
15 Here is a saying you can depend on as being true; everyone should believe this: "Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners"—and I am the worst of them all. 16 But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life. 17 All honor and glory to God forever and ever! He is the eternal King, the unseen one who never dies; he alone is God. Amen.
When Paul wrote to the Roman believers saying “Nothing good dwells in me.” he had been walking faithfully and powerfully with Jesus for 22 years.
By the time he wrote to Timothy saying “I am the worst of sinners.” he had been walking with the Lord for about 29 years.
I mention this because you could read these words and think they came from a new Christian suffering from low self-esteem, or filled with self-loathing because he or she was struggling to get the hang of living the perfect Christian life. Of course no one lives the perfect Christian life. It’s just that we have a perfect Savior.
But these are not the words of a young believer or a discourage old man.
In fact in both Scriptures they are part (A) of Paul’s testimony. He is simply saying that in my natural-born self I am a sinner start to finish. But in part (B) Paul speaks of the source of his stamina over the years and his life of victory over shipwrecks, snake bites, people bites, criticism, lies, stonings, beatings, loneliness, hunger, nakedness and thirst and imprisonment.
In the Romans passage Paul ends the paragraph by answering his own question of who will save him from the law of sin and He breaks into something like a song of gratitude saying; 25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! …that’s who!
In the Timothy passage Paul gives us the same conclusion saying; verse 17 All honor and glory to God forever and ever! He is the eternal King, the unseen one who never dies; he alone is God. Amen.
Paul is giving us his testimony to the faithfulness and ability of Jesus. He says; “When it comes to victory over the life of sin I lean all my weight on the Savior who came for me. I walk in this confidence—He loves me.”
Paul is a man who knows from a first hand encounter with Jesus that he has been set free from the exhausting and impossible task of conquering sin by self-effort.
Look at what he says to us; (1 Tim 1:15); What I am telling you is absolutely true, and anyone reading this letter should believe what I am saying: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—and I am the worst of them all.
This is not what you would expect to hear from a 29 year veteran of world-changing evangelism. This kind of raw honesty causes religious folks to cringe and cover the ears of their children. We must keep them from hearing such as this while we teach them how to look good.
In Luke’s Gospel narrative we read of Jesus in His hometown synagogue in Nazareth. He is asked to read from the Scriptures. He rolls the scroll open to Isaiah where the great prophet some 700 years earlier heard by the Spirit Israel’s (not yet born) Messiah/Savior speak these words;.
Isaiah 61:1 The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to bring good news to the poor;
he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim liberty to the captives,
and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;
2 to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor,
and the day of vengeance of our God;
to comfort all who mourn;
3 to grant to those who mourn in Zion—
to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit;
that they may be called oaks of righteousness,
the planting of the Lord. ESV,
When Jesus is done reading the passage we are told Luke 4:20 And he rolled up the scroll and gave it back to the attendant and sat down. And the eyes of all in the synagogue were fixed on him. 21 And he began to say to them, "Today this Scripture has been fulfilled in your hearing."
Clearly Jesus is saying; “I am the One Isaiah heard speaking. Those were My words he heard and recorded. And if anyone wants to understand My mission all they need do is look to see that the Father has anointed and sent Me to the poor, the brokenhearted, the captives, the prisoners and those who mourn.
These are the ones I came for. I am their Savior. I love them and I long to see the day when they come to embrace and know my love first hand.”
So when Paul stands before us saying Rom 7:18) For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh, he is simply placing himself among the list of those fro whom Jesus came.
He is saying I was a captive in a religious systems that told me I could be saved by my own effort. But the harder I tried to save myself the more I understood that I was really very bad but I was not free to say so. But once I understood that Christ came into the world to save sinners then I was set free to say “…and I am the worst.”
Paul is saying; “I find in my old self the same thoughtless self-absorption that was ever there. I find the same old desires, the same selfishness, the same defensiveness, the same anger and jealousy, the same basic self-deception as regards myself. I am a walking closet of contradictions. Nothing good dwells in my flesh—nothing that would save me, but everything that would recommend me for a place in hell.
“All my hope is in Jesus. He came for sinners. He loved me while I hated Him. He loved me while I hated Him and anyone who claimed to trust in Him, loved me when I was breathing out threats of slaughter and destruction against His church, loved me when I was an awful mess and He loves me now that I am a mess in the process of being saved.
In his letter to Timothy Paul completes his testimony saying;
16 But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life.
None of us can understand how free and relaxed Paul feels simply by reading his words. We must experience the freedom Paul is speaking of if we are to read his words with any depth of participation in his joy.
Paul has been released from living a false life—a life spent hiding the truth about the sinner who lives in his skin.
He was an expert at keeping up appearances—a cup, clean on the outside but smeared with all manner of pride and arrogance and anger and jealousy on the inside. But… he knew how to mask all that.
He knew what not to eat, where not to go, who not to be seen with, and what not to touch. And the harder he was on himself in keeping all these rules the better he thought he looked, and the more he despised people who didn’t keep the rules as good as he did.
In writing to the Philippian believers (see Philip. 3:6-9) Paul looks back on this old life of smoke and mirrors and lies and says in so many words, “Thank God, I am done manufacturing my own righteousness. I am done with the hopeless work of earning God’s approval. These days, since Jesus found me, my greatest sense of myself is that I am a man who is loved by Jesus and I didn’t do anything to earn it. I was the worst of sinners and He came for me, and, praise be to God, He found me and my only source of righteousness now is that righteousness He gives to those who trust Him.
Paul goes on saying; “Now that I have seen and directly experienced the righteousness of God that is freely given to all who trust Jesus Christ, I look upon all that I once bragged about in the old religious life as nothing more than a large and stinking pile of manure. No wonder wherever I went in the world it smelled bad to me. But it wasn’t the world. It wasn’t other people. It was me.
But now I know that Jesus came for sinners and I know He came for me. In fact He ambushed me on the Damascus road and now through me spread the fragrance of His loving presence to others. (see 2 Corinthians 2:14.
So I want you to picture Paul coming right up close to you in order to tell you why God has found him a useful servant. He sits down in front of you and says, “It’s true. I am the worst of sinners; 1 Timothy 1:16 But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life. 17 All honor and glory to God forever and ever! He is the eternal King, the unseen one who never dies; he alone is God. Amen.
Paul is telling us of his great relief, of the glorious freedom he lives in. He doesn’t have to fake righteousness anymore. He has finally come to the place where he is living in a warm and relaxed love that Jesus has for Him. He is resting his whole life upon Him. Now that the truth is out and the fake righteousness has ceased He is actually enjoying life spent in fellowship with Jesus.
About 700 years ago an English woman we know as Julian of Norwich had a series of very clear visions (“showings” as she called them), concerning the unsurpassable love of God. She wrote a great deal about what God showed her, and among all she wrote was this; “The greatest honor we can give Almighty God is to live gladly because of the knowledge of his love.”
Let me tie her words to the words of Jesus.
In John chapter 6 some men have come to Jesus and asked what they would have to do have to do to become participants in the work of God. John 6:29 Jesus answered them, "This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent."
The greatest pleasure you can bring to the Father, the highest honor you can pay Him, and the way to enter into the work He has for you is to believe on him who the Father sent. That is to rest all your hope and all your life on Jesus your Savior, God’s only begotten Son. The Amplified Bible opens the meaning of what Jesus said as follows; John 6:29 … that you believe in the One Whom He has sent [that you cleave to, trust, rely on, and have faith in His Messenger].
AMP "
Trust Him, Believe in Him. Surrender yourself each day to His unfailing love.
Here is a poem emailed to me last Monday morning. The author , according to the email, was thinking about the infinite love of God and the Brennan Manning clip we saw on Sunday morning and felt inspired to write in celebration of that love. What was written was a celebratory poem entitled Before.
Before
Before I breathed my first breath of air
Before I knew I even had a care
Before I knew there was evil and good
You loved me
Before I took my very first step
Before the first secret I ever kept
Before the first time rejection took hold
You loved me
Before I knew that I needed you so
Before I would fight you and roam
Before I would choose the double life I’d known
You loved me
Before I would speak your name in vain
Before I made choices, and I was to blame
Before my heart conflicted found shame
You loved me
Before I was deep and guilty with sin
Before the darkness and sadness within
Before my heart filled with doubts and despair
You loved me
You loved me beyond anything I could imagine or compare
You loved me though I would despise you and not care
You loved me even when I loved you last.
You loved me.
Written by Sherry Bell
Monday morning 1-30-12
If the love of God is deep enough and wide enough and gracious enough and merciful enough to patiently embrace me not as I should be but as I am, then surely I should be able to relax and be patient with myself. In fact it is that relaxed and enjoyable devotion to Jesus that produces very deep and sometimes very rapid changed in my life. My attention is not all taken up on my sin. Rather, my attention is all taken up with Jesus, and it is in seeing Him that I am changed.
But not only can I relax as regards myself, I can give to others what I have received from Jesus, I can patiently love them as I hope they will love me, contradictions and all.
And if they don’t love me with all my contradictions, then what?
Still I can relax and embrace Jesus who knows everything there is to know about me, and still loves me as I am.
I don’t have to live my life begging and craving for the good opinion of others. I rest my life upon Jesus who loved me and came for me.
I can relax while God patiently works in us both. And I am free in the grace of God to live gladly, to love God and enjoy Him forever starting now.
Are you resting in the Son of God?
Do you believe that He loves you?
Are you enjoying His company?
Are you actually experiencing the gift of His grace each day?
