“Questions of Christmas: What If God Says ‘No’?”
2 Sam. 7:1-17
The kindergarten girl asks her 2nd grade sister, “Can I play with your doll?” “NO!” The just turned 16 year old asks his dad, “All my friends got to drive a group of us around for a while on their 16th birthday. Can I have the car to do the same?” “NO!” The teenager finally musters up the courage to ask that special someone, “Would you like to go out Friday night?” “NO!” The wife and her husband have been battling furiously lately; finally she confronts him, “We need to see a marriage counselor. We have to put this marriage back together. Will you come with me?” “NO!” “Doctor,” asks the husband, “Is there anything you can do to help my wife?” “NO!”
“NO!” We’ve all been there, heard that! We know the sorrow, the anger, the bitterness from being turned down, from being refused. But what if the “NO”! is from God? What do we do, how do we handle it when God says “NO!”? Today’s Scripture, by showing the steps of David’s encounter with God, gives us some guidance.
First, like David, we need to DEVELOP THE PREMISE. At this point in time David is riding high; he’s experiencing the good life. It was a period of tremendous peace and calm - in David’s home, in Israel, and in the nation’s spiritual life. And it occurred to him that while he was living in a great palace, and the people had all they needed, God had no permanent dwelling place. So why not use his time and energy, his resources and his skills to build a glorious temple for his great God? Certainly this premise is reasonable, logical, and scriptural. David was thinking of the honor and glory of God; he loved God and wanted to do the best for Him. In fact, the II Chronicles account of this same story quotes God as saying that it was well that it was within David’s heart to do so.
There’s a principle here for us to remember: GOD LOVES THOSE WHO LOVE TO DO HIS WILL. That’s why Paul begins his practical advice in the 12th chapter of Romans by urging Christians to be transformed by the renewal of their minds so that they will be able to “test and approve what God’s will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will.” God wants us to be discerning concerning His will. We are to dream God’s dreams, to do great things for a great God, to be willing to serve wherever, whenever.
Barb and I had a similar experience with a premise. During the summer of 1993 - when our congregation was just beginning to deal with the questions surrounding an inquiry about selling our facilities to another congregation - a church near Sacramento, California expressed a keen desire in me as a potential Sr. Pastor. Being persistent, they eventually offered to fly us out for two days to be interviewed and to become familiar with their ministry. We were one of three couples they were inviting to do so. By this time we felt we at least should accommodate their request, since it was exploratory only - no obligations. We, after all, wanted to discern God’s will, to serve wherever, whenever. It was our premise.
Certainly you have had premises in your life as well. You probably have several even now. Ask yourself this morning, “WHAT IS THE PREMISE IN MY LIFE?” Maybe you want your child to accept Jesus Christ; you want your cancer healed, your business to succeed; you desire our church to grow; you want to find a mate; you really would like the job you just interviewed for; you desperately want your marriage repaired and saved. What’s the issue for you when it comes to discerning God’s will? Keep it in the forefront of your mind as we continue with David’s experience.
Being wise, David next began to DELIBERATE THE PLAN. He shared his thoughts with the prophet Nathan which, in essence, was sharing them with God. It’s a time of clarifying, asking, seeking affirmation. It needs to be part of every planning process. Is it needed? Is it necessary? Does it honor God? Is the time right? Is God approving of this plan?
The principle here is THE PLAN IS ONLY RIGHT WHEN THE PLAN IS RIGHT TO GOD. No boat with God on board will ever sink so get God on board! Maybe you’ve seen the bumper sticker which says, “Baby on Board.” So every plan needs God on board. Proverbs 16 (3 & 9) states “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established…The human mind plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps.” So David consulted a trusted colleague and sought God’s affirmation and involvement.
Isn’t that what prayer really is? Requesting God, through the Holy Spirit, to interfere with life and bring about a desired result? It’s like little Mary who, having been naughty, was sent into her bedroom to “think things over.” Coming out all smiles after a while, she said, “I thought and prayed.” Her mother said, “Fine! That will help you to be good.” Mary responded, “Oh, I didn’t ask Him to help me to be good. I told Him to help you put up with me.” That’s asking God to interfere! It’s what Scripture invites and commands us to do. Jesus tells us to ask, seek, knock - and to keep on doing so. He tells us to persist until we get our answer, and to ask whatever we will and then promises it will be given to us. Paul wrote (Phil. 4:6) - “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Deliberating the plan is a God given idea. And Nathan tells David to go ahead and get busy with the temple building.
Back to 1993. Barb and I went to California. While there the Lord spoke powerfully to us. We had the most moving, inspirational meeting with a search committee we’d ever had up to that point in time. Barb and I both felt the whole time we were “soul to soul” with the people involved. It was a happening which could not be explained, only experienced. And they felt the same way. In fact, they asked us to give serious consideration to whether or not we’d even be willing to move to California; and if we decided we would be to select a weekend later in the summer when we could fly back for 2nd time to meet with the congregation and lead worship. They were convinced they would want us to do so. Follow up correspondence and conversations affirmed the same thing.
So Barb and I prayed. We began to see things in our devotions which gave us guidance. We sought out a friend who is a pastoral counselor and he helped us process some questions and issues. We talked with our 3 boys about what was happening to keep them informed but also to test out their responses. We concluded we would make ourselves available to go back for the 2nd trip - that God was asking us to be ready and willing move to California. So we committed ourselves to the process and selected the date to return. We were anxious but excited about the possibility.
But now to you. That premise you’ve tucked in the forefront of your mind. Consider; HAVE I ASKED GOD IF THIS IS RIGHT? With whom have you consulted? What have the Scriptures revealed to you? Have you prayed with conviction and earnestness? Its’ all part of the deliberation process - Is God on board?
Back to David. After a good night’s sleep, Nathan returned with a message from God. It was now time for David to DISCERN THE PERMISSION. According to Nathan, God said “NO!” Furthermore, God indicated that while he was saying “No” to David, He would, however, say “Yes” to David’s son; the son would build the temple! David was not the right person and this was not the right time. David’s bubble was burst.
See the principle? GOD CAN AND DOES SAY NO. Sometimes our plans are God’s and sometimes they are not; sometimes the plan is good and right, but not for us. Sometimes the plans are right but the time is not. Remember Paul’s struggle? He said he had a thorn in the flesh - some problem which caused him great difficulty and discomfort. He asked God three times to remove it. God said, “NO!” God can and does say that! He does not always grant permission.
I can still feel the emotion of that phone conversation in 1993. I had my little talk all prepared when I called the contact person; we were ready to go further in the process, willing to seriously consider it; we had the return date chosen. We were feeling truly led. And he said, “NO!” He had trouble putting it into words but at the last moment they decided to have one of the other two candidates return; and he was feeling terrible because they thought I would be the one - right up until the end. And I soon discovered that not only was it not me, it was a very good friend of mine who went. Not me, but him! Our bubble had burst. We really hadn’t thought God might just still say “NO!” Now that we had really discerned his permission, or denial, we were stunned.
Back to you. Do you realize God may also say “NO” to you? Ask yourself, “AM I READY FOR GOD TO SAY NO?” We are always ready to give God thanks when He responds favorably and gives to us, but what about when He takes away from us? What if my child does not come to accept the Lord? What if my cancer is not healed or my business does not succeed? What if our church does not grow or I do not find a mate? What if this job doesn’t develop? What if my marriage doesn’t turn around? Are you ready for the dream to die, for the great thing you plan or desire to be taken away? To seek God’s will is to face the possibility of hearing God’s “NO!”
Let’s return to David. How did he handle the disappointment? He sat down and prayed - verse 18. And his prayer was a humble recognition of God’s greatness, goodness, and faithfulness in what He had done and would still do for and through David. “Who am I. O Sovereign Lord, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? ... What more can David say to you? ...How great you are, O Sovereign Lord! There is no one like you, and there is no God but you...!” David responded in gratitude and submission. He could not fully understand how God was going to work everything out, but he trusted God to carry out all that He promised. And he ended by claiming the promises for his family: “O Sovereign Lord,
you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant. Now be pleased to bless the house of your servant, that it may continue forever in your sight; for you, O Sovereign Lord, have spoken, and with your blessing the house of your servant will be blessed forever.”
The principle we learn is that A NO TO OUR PLANS MAY BE BUT THE PRELUDE TO GOD’S GREATER PLAN. When God withholds or denies our plan He often offers another grander one. David learned not so much what he could do for God as what God planned to do for him. IT’S NOT AN ISSUE OF BEING WRONG BUT OF WILLINGNESS TO LIVE IN THE MYSTERY OF GOD’S WILL. We may not be able to explain God’s will any more clearly, nor his mysteries, but we are drawn to trust His light even in the darkness. As Job said, “Even though he slay me, yet I will trust him! ... The Lord gives, the Lord takes away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” That’s a willingness to be aligned to God’s will.
I must confess that back in 1993 my first response was not like David’s! I sat and I prayed, but the prayer was different. I was confused, hurt, shaken, and unsure. But eventually I was renewed, re-energized, and refocused. I gained the vision and strength to move ahead with all the selling and merger issues our congregation would face. Barb and I would be around for the completion of our boys’ high school and college days; we’d be here to enjoy the preparation for at least our eldest sons’ wedding – and as it turned out for all the sons’ weddings and the births of our first grandchildren. God was good - again. We eventually recognized that through it all God was just testing our willingness. He already knew what we had yet to discover - that we really were ready to be ready to do His will. We had to learn that this was the most important thing. When God said “NO!” we needed to face up to our willingness.
Ask yourself: CAN I LIVE IN THE MYSTERY OF HIS WILL? CAN I LIVE LIFE IN GRATITUDE? Can you, if God says no, put yourself in the current of His will and purposes? Are you willing to discover God’s possibilities? Remember Paul’s thorn? Listen to Paul’s learning (2 Cor. 12:7-10): “Three times I prayed to the Lord about this and asked him to take it away. But his answer was: My grace is all you need, for my power is greatest when you are weak. I am most happy, then, to be proud of my weaknesses, in order to feel the protection of Christ's power over me. I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and difficulties for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
If God said to you, “I have given you my grace,” WOULD THAT BE ENOUGH FOR YOU? With your child, your cancer, your business, your church, your potential life’s mate, your future job, your marriage - would God’s grace alone be enough? Listen to Max Lucado in In the Grip of Grace: “You see, from heaven’s perspective, grace IS enough. If God did nothing more that save us from hell, could anyone complain? If God saved our souls and then left us to spend our lives leprosy-struck on a deserted island, would he be unjust? Having been given eternal life, dare we grumble at an aching body? Having been given heavenly riches, dare we bemoan earthly poverty? Let me be quick to add, God has not left you with “just salvation. ... our oldest daughter fell into a swimming pool when she was two years old. A friend saw her and pulled her to safety. ..the next morning in my prayer time ...I made a special effort to record my gratitude in my journal. I told God how wonderful he was for saving her. As clearly as if God himself were speaking, this question came to mind: ‘Would I be less wonderful had I let her drown? Would I be less a good God for calling her home? Would I still be receiving your praise this morning had I not saved her?’ Is God still a good God when he says no?” (1) GOD HAS EVERY RIGHT TO SAY NO AND WE HAVE EVERY REASON TO GIVE THANKS. That’s the way we discover the possibilities of God.
God does have plans for us, for good and not for ill. So sometimes He says “NO!” He even said “NO!” to his very own Son who wanted the cup of crucifixion and death to pass from Him. But God’s greater plan prevailed. And through Jesus we have received the grace of God. By His death, we have God’s eternal blessings. Through His resurrection God turned the evil acts of men into His gracious will in order to love and save us. Through Jesus Christ we have the assurance that “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.”
I know some of your premises this morning. I do not, of course, know them all. But each of us brought into worship some things we have been bringing to God. We want His action in our lives. Our hearts are heavy and our hands are full. We really do not want God to say “NO!” But He might! We can cling to and keep our hopes and plans, or we can submit them to God and be free from carrying them around. As Martha Snell Nicholson has penned:
“One by one He took them from me, the things I valued most,
Until I was empty handed; Every glittering toy was lost.
And I walked earth’s highways, grieving, In my rags and poverty.
Till I heard His voice inviting, “Lift those empty hands to Me!”
So I held my hands towards Heaven, And He filled them with a store
Of his own transcendent riches Till they could contain no more.
And at last I comprehended With my stupid mind and dull, That God COULD not pour His riches Into hands already full.”
Are you ready for God to say “No”? Is grace enough for you? Can you empty your hands to Him? Let us pray.
1 - Max Lucado, 'In the Grip of Grace', Word Publishing, (C) 1996 by Max Lucado, p.131-132
