Last week in our Mountain Moment series, we considered the "Mountain of Choice" as we looked at Elijah’s showdown on Mt. Carmel with the prophets of Baal. One man stood against the darkness of a nation. One man represented God when no one else would. When you look at Elijah’s encounter with the prophets of Baal it really seems like Elijah stood alone. It was just Him and His confidence in God’s call that motivated him to push against the darkness. it’s hard not to be impressed with Elijah--what faith!
J. Oswald Sanders wrote that "Elijah appeared at zero hour in Israel’s history...like a meteor, he flashed across the inky blackness of Israel’s spiritual night." And Chuck Swindoll describes Elijah as "plunging full-force into the midst of this era of gross evil and wickedness." Elijah is the superhero of the prophets. He is the Indiana Jones of Old Testament. He is the guy that battles it out with the darkness: even when the odds are 450 to one!
Elijah also becomes the willing conduit of God’s grace because, as we saw last week, on Mount Carmel God refused to abandon His people--even though they had clearly abandoned Him. After three years of preparing their hearts, God opened their eyes and extended His hand and He said: "Remember Me? I am your God and you are my people!" He declared Himself to be their God--even though they had run after other gods and lived for themselves and forgotten Him. So God puts their faces in His hands and He says "Look at me! I am your source of life. I am your only hope. Choose life by choosing Me."
You don’t get a better mountaintop moment than the moment on Mount Carmel. After all, this moment had it all: Faith, courage, love, forgiveness, hope, fireworks, drama, and an ending in which the good guys win and the captives have the potential to be set free. This is the Star Wars Episode 4 of Mountaintop moments--only infinitely better because it didn’t happen in a galaxy far, far away.
Today we climb another mountain with Elijah, but this mountain is quite different--even though it takes place immediately after the battle on Mount Carmel. On this mountain there will be no crowds and no showdowns, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t a battle. In fact this battle is bigger in my opinion because it is a battle that is much more personal.
Now, if you thought that last week’s mountain did a good job of shining the light on God’s grace, hold onto your seats because this mountain is gracerific! It’s graceiforous! It’s gracetastic, you get the idea.
Please turn with me to 1 Kings 19, p. 303. We will be beginning with verse 1.
As you turn there let me give you a bit of background to help you understand the abrupt shift that we are about to experience in Elijah’s faith.
Elijah began his ministry as a prophet by giving Ahab the message that there would no longer be any rain for the next few years. After that, God told Elijah to go into hiding, which he did for the next three years.
For three years God prepared the nation to accept Him. For three years Elijah waits patiently in the wings. Can you imagine how much time Elijah spent thinking and praying about God’s call on His life? He knew God was up to something and he knew that he was the man in the middle of God’s plan, but he didn’t know exactly what God was going to do and he didn’t exactly know how he would fit into the plan. For three years there were prayers, questions, hopes, thoughts, ideas, and a building excitement and anticipation. Then finally the call came. It was time to come out of hiding.
In every life there are moments that you just know are going to be historic. Every life is full of days that are like every other day, but then occasionally a day comes that is electric, monumental, overwhelming, and pregnant with power and meaning. The day you graduate from school, the day you pass your driver’s license, the day you get your first apartment, the day you marry, the day your child is born, all of these are monumental days. But when God gave Elijah the plan to have representatives from the ten northern tribes assemble for a once in a lifetime display of God’s power to debunk the supposed power of the false god Baal, Elijah knew that he was in the center of God’s big push to reclaim His people. Days don’t get more monumental than this!
So as Elijah, sat there that morning, eating his Wheaties, he knew that what was about to happen on Mount Carmel would change everything. A new era was about to begin in Israel and God was using him to make it happen! And happen it did! It was powerful. It was beautiful. It was everything with a side of potato salad. It was the bee’s knees and the cat’s meow all rolled up into a bundle of "That’s what I am talkin’ about!"
The people realized their mistake. They finally see who their God really is. The prophets of Baal are seized and permanently "˜retired,"(tm) so to speak, and Elijah was the man that God used to do all that.
Then, immediately after, Elijah prays faithfully, persistently and after the seventh session of prayer, the answer comes: Refreshing rain is unleashed from the heavens for the first time in over three years! The physical and spiritual drought was over because Elijah had acted in faithful obedience. Victory doesn’t get any bigger than this! Such a clear, decisive, miraculous victory is a rare thing--even for someone of Elijah’s faith and stature.
Beginning with verse 1 of 1 Kings 19, we read: "Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. 2So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, "May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them." 3 Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, 4 while he himself went a day’s journey into the desert. He came to a broom tree, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. "I have had enough, LORD," he said. "Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors." (1 Kings 19:1-4). Let’s stop there for now.
What happened? One minute Elijah is on top of the world and the next he was praying that he might die? Is this the mother of all mood-swings? In chapter 18 of 1 Kings, Elijah is the Indiana Jones of prophets, but in chapter 19 he has quickly become the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde of prophets. What’s going on? Can it really be true that Elijah can take a stand against Ahab and 450 prophets of Baal, but he can’t handle a few discouraging words from Jezebel? Ladies, do you see the kind of power you have over men?
OK, it is true that Jezebel is particularly scary and angry, but does Elijah really believe that God can’t protect Him from her? Well, I do have to say that the scariest people I have met in my ministry have all been women. And just so you know, none of those women are Sheila. Did I say that right dear? So, I’ll give Elijah that much: women can be scary and Jezebel is at the top of anyone’s list of scary women, but something else must be going on. I mean it in verse 3, God’s Word says that Elijah ran away because he was afraid for his life and then in verse 4, we find him praying for God to kill him! I can see Elijah preferring to be killed by God rather than Jezebel, after all, it would have been a lot less painful, but really this is a bit confusing isn’t it?
No, not really. Here is what I think is going on. Elijah falls apart because the results from Mount Carmel weren’t what he was expecting. They were what he dreamed about for the three years he was on the side-lines waiting to be put into the game. In his mind, he envisioned an entirely different result: He expected revival. He expected changed hearts and reclaimed lives hungry for God. He expected Ahab and Jezebel to see what was so clear and so obvious up there on Mount Carmel--that Yahweh was the one true God, but Jezebel didn’t care about the message of Mount Carmel. No one was going to tell her how to live her life and who to worship!
And in that realization Elijah understood that the victory he thought he had won for God wasn’t really a victory at all, at least in his estimation. Jezebel was still Baal’s cheer leader and since it was her zeal and her powers of persuasion that turned Israel into Baal worshippers in the first place, nothing really had changed. Three years of waiting for nothing. Standing alone, against a sea of ignorance and falsehood didn’t really matter. The people may have been shaken up, but it was only a matter of time before the mountaintop moment of Mount Carmel was a distant dream. "It didn’t really happen did it?" The people would say. Eventually it would be business as usual.
And then Elijah came face to face with the question everyone dreads: "What does it matter?" More specifically the question was, "What do I matter?" All that sacrifice did nothing. He had put on a good show--nothing more. His ministry was a charade. He couldn’t motivate people out of a wet paper bag. He was no better than his ancestors, the prophets who also failed to make an impact.
Ministry is a joke. Preaching the Word is a joke. Thinking that you can actually be used by God to make a difference is a joke. You might motivate them for 30 minutes on a Sunday but come Monday morning the spirit of Jezebel takes back whatever little bit of victory there may have been.
Here’s the thing: when Elijah says "take my life" he isn’t really asking God to take his life. What he’s saying is: "I thought serving God would be different. I thought I could really make a difference. I thought what I did was going to be important, but I was wrong. I am no better than any other prophet who failed." When you look at it closely, what Elijah is really saying is: "You failed me God! I trusted in you and things didn’t turn out the way I expected them to. I did everything I was supposed to. Why didn’t you take care of Ahab and Jezebel? Why didn’t you use this opportunity and bring revival? Why make all this fire on the mountain if it really wasn’t going to mean anything?" I understand Elijah very well, what about you?
Maybe you need to put this in a bit of a different context. Have you ever thought something like: "God, I’m doing my best to serve you, but now I don’t even know how I’m going to pay the bills! I thought I was following you and doing what you want, and this is how you repay me?"
Maybe, you’ve thought something along these lines: "God, I started that Sunday school ministry, and no one is showing up. And even when they do, no one is listening. I’m so discouraged, I just want to quit!"
Or possibly you’ve thought: "God, I am trying real hard to serve you and make a difference and I realize I shouldn’t be looking for praise or recognition, but the thing is, I don’t even know if anyone cares about what I am doing?"
Maybe you thought something along these lines: "I have claimed the promises of your Word and I have trusted in your power, but I am weak and miserable and alone. I was told that following you changes everything, but if that is true, why am I wrestling with the same things?"
The essence of what Elijah is feeling here is that somehow his faith in God had not brought about the desired results he had hoped for. What makes this even harder on Him is that these weren’t selfish-shallow results he was looking for. He wasn’t asking for God to help him win the lottery, he was looking for revival. He was looking for the very thing that he figured God wanted. So he ran away, not only from the danger of Jezebel. He also ran away from what he saw was the failure of his ministry.
Picking up the story in verse 5, we read: "Then he lay down and slept under the broom tree. But as he was sleeping, an angel touched him and told him, "Get up and eat!" 6He looked around and saw some bread baked on hot stones and ajar of water! So he ate and drank and lay down again. 7Then the angel of the LORD came again and touched him and said, "Get up and eat some more, for there is a long journey ahead of you." 8So he got up and ate and drank, and the food gave him enough strength to travel forty days and forty nights to Mount Sinai, the mountain of God."
This is where we see God’s grace begin to kick in. Elijah accuses God of not living up to His part of deal and in a moment of self-pity he prays: "My life stinks, kill me now!" This is a similar prayer to what I call my usual Monday morning prayer. But God doesn’t take this opportunity to straighten out Elijah’s warped perspective at this point. Instead, God is gentle. He is patient. He is loving. He doesn’t condemn Elijah. Instead He helps him regain his strength.
As I think of this passage and what it teaches us about faith and depression, I have to admit that often my attitude has been less than compassionate. We tend to lose patience with those who are having a hard time dealing with depression and we want to say, "Come on, get your act together and get on with it," but God doesn’t do that. He understands what’s going on with Elijah. And we have to do the same. Notice also Elijah’s physical condition. He is stressed out. He is exhausted. He is overwhelmed. And he had done what we all do in this kind of a state. He has isolated himself from everyone else. We have to realize that being spiritually and physically tired go together. So you can’t be burnt out and expect yourself to function well spiritually. More importantly, when you are battling depression you have to fight the urge to isolate yourself. You have to find strength from your brothers and sisters in Christ. You have to find help.
Well, God empowers Elijah to return to Mount Sinai, the mountain of God. God takes Elijah, back to the beginning, back to the start, back to the first great innocent days of new faith in the Lord God. Sometimes, all we really need to do is get some rest, and take some time to go back to the place where we first met God and then we have to examine ourselves and be honest with God!
Picking up the story at the mountain of God, we read that "There he went into a cave and spent the night. And the word of the LORD came to him: "What are you doing here, Elijah?" 10 He replied, "I have been very zealous for the LORD God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too."
In verse 9 the Hebrew literally says that Elijah went into "the cave"--not "a cave". This could very well be the same cave that Moses was in when He saw the glory of the Lord pass by him.
What do you think of God’s question? "What are you doing here, Elijah?" Is this a rebuke from God? No, I don’t think so. God is ministering to Elijah. He is helping Elijah to get through the cloud of despair. He wants Elijah to climb above that cloud so He brings him to the Mountain of God and he asks Elijah, OK, spill it. What’s on your mind? What’s your problem with me? And Elijah tells him. He basically says: "I seem to be more zealous for You than you are! I seem to care more about the spiritual darkness that covers the land than you do! It seems like it is just me out front doing everything all by myself and instead of you helping out so we can get the desired results, I’m dealing with death threats. What’s up with that?! Why is it that I seem more concerned than you do? Explain that to me will you?"
Let’s move on to God’s response. Starting at verse 11 we read: "Go out and stand before me on the mountain," the LORD told him. And as Elijah stood there, the LORD passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12And after the earthquake there was afire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper. 13When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his cloak and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave. And a voice said, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"
Have you ever just wanted God to do something so obvious, so powerful as to make His will, His presence, His power clear and undeniable? Have you ever thought, "Lord, if only you could part the sea one more time, or appear in a pillar of fire or a cloud and lead me, then I wouldn’t have a problem believing and following! Well, guess what. That’s just not true. Look at what God is trying to teach Elijah here. He brings forth a windstorm, then an earthquake, then fire. He demonstrates the same kind of power as he did a short time before this on Mount Carmel. It was a display of power and might. But it isn’t in those acts that God speaks. He speaks in a gentle whisper. Other translations call it a "still small voice." The Hebrew is even more picturesque. It is literally: "˜the sound of gentle quietness."
God is obviously trying to say something to Elijah here with this display of His power and then His speaking through His gentle quietness. Interesting after this demonstration God asks Elijah the very same question: "What are you doing here?" And here is what I really find interesting. Look at Elijah’s reply. It is exactly, word for word, the same as his first reply: He replied, "I have been very zealous for the LORD God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too." (1 Kings 19:14)
Now, let me ask you a question: what was the point of God asking Elijah the same question after the manifestation of His power on the mountain? Obviously the intention was to get a different answer from Elijah, right? But, Elijah is too depressed to care.
So God displays wind and earthquake and fire. He rocks Elijah’s world and then He whispers in His ear and Elijah doesn’t change his perspective at all. He is still of the opinion that He cares more than God does. He still feels alone, betrayed, and a failure. There is nothing here in this passage that really suggests that Elijah has a spiritual breakthrough. This mountaintop moment leaves us bitterly cold. Elijah is too wrapped up in himself and the music at his pity party is too loud to be in a position to hear God clearly.
But you know what? That doesn’t matter because God has given Elijah his answer. He tells Elijah--"You wanted your ministry to be fireworks and earthquakes. You wanted big things to happen and because they didn’t happen, you feel like a failure. Your problem isn’t me--It’s you. The problem is in your expectations because I wasn’t in the wind and fire and the earthquake. I was in the small, quiet moment that came after. The fire may have got your attention, but I communicated through the still small voice.
After this, God gives Elijah new instructions. He says, go back the way you came and anoint Hazael King of the Syrians, then anoint Jehu king of Israel, then anoint Elisha as prophet to continue the work after you. This was God’s whisper. He was at work. Things would change--just not in the way that Elijah imagined. In fact 7,000 of God’s people remained in Israel, dedicated to the One True God. What is God saying? He is saying, "Elijah, don’t worry about the details. Just be obedient. Just be faithful. I am God and this is my plan and these are my details."
Does Elijah ever have another Mount Carmel moment? No he doesn’t . But here is the thing I want you to consider. When Elijah’s ministry is over, God drives by in his white Hummer limo and He picks Elijah up.
What’s that about? It’s not like God is in the habit of doing such things. There had to be a point to it.
Here is the point. In his despair, Elijah doubts. He fears. He falls apart. He isolates himself. In fact, he is so wrapped up in what he has determined as is his spiritual failure that when God speaks, Elijah doesn’t listen. His self-defeating, cesspool of an attitude remained. He still sees himself as a failure. He still is confused about God, but he puts his feelings aside and he goes back and continues to serve God. So at the end of his ministry, God does something to show Elijah that in His eyes Elijah was and forever would be a hero of the faith.
In picking Elijah up to take him home God is saying: "You may have thought you were a failure. You may have even blamed me for that failure, but guess what? You were never a failure. You did what I asked. You stood when no one else would. And when you had given up on yourself and were confused about me, you still went back and continued to serve. You felt like a failure because you looked through your eyes, but if you had looked through my eyes you would have seen how proud I was of you. You ministry wasn’t want you thought it would be, but it was exactly what I needed it to be. Do you see why I call this Mountain of Despair gracalicious?
What are you beating yourself up about? What in your life feels like failure? What in your life makes you feel even a tiny bit disappointed in God? The fact of the matter is that God doesn’t call you to be successful--He calls you to be faithful. Our success, our victory is found in Him. And the reality is that sometimes our own expectations blind us to God’s pleasure in us. Elijah shows us that even when we feel like a failure and even when we are disappointed in God, God is never disappointed in us--as long as we are open to Him and doing our best to follow Him--especially in those times when we don’t feel like it. After all, it is easy to follow God when everything is fire and earthquakes, but real faith comes from moving forward when we feel like a failure. Faith is about trusting when we don’t feel like trusting. Winston Churchill once said: "If you are going through hell, keep going."
In a far country lived a band of minstrels who travelled from town to town making a living through their music. Things were not good. Times were hard and there wasn’t much money for common folk to come to hear the minstrels, even though their fee was small. Attendance had been falling off, so early one evening the group met to discuss their situation. "I see no reason for opening tonight," one said. "I agree," another disheartened singer said. "Last night we performed just for my mother and she left half way through our set.
Then he turned to another sitting beside him. "What do you think?" The response from this older, wiser man was to look straight at his troupe and say: "I know you are discouraged. I am too. But we have a responsibility to those who might come. We will go on. And we will do the best job of which we are capable. It is not the fault of those who come that others do not. They should not be punished with less than the best we can give." Heartened by his words, the minstrels went ahead with their show. They never performed better.
When the show was over and the small audience gone, the old man called the troupe to him. In his hand was a note, handed to him by one of the audience as they left. "Listen to this, my friends!" Something electrifying in his tone of voice made them turn to him in anticipation. Slowly the old man read: "Thank you for a beautiful performance." It was signed very simply--"Your King."
Sometimes our own expectations blind us to God’s pleasure in us. Step out in faith and leave the outcome to Him and when you feel alone and defeated, get up and go back and try again. Persistence is always a beautiful performance to our King.
