Title: Not Your Big Redneck Wedding
Text: Matthew 22:1-14 (Luke 14:15-24)
Thesis: Don’t toss your invitation to the royal wedding… make the most of it!
Introduction
In January of 2008 a new reality TV program dubbed “My Big Redneck Wedding” aired. Hosted by Tom Arnold, the producers scour the country to find the most “down-home” couples they can find and then document their journey down the aisle and I quote, “as outrageous and over-the-top as it might be.”
The weddings are eccentric affairs with 4-legged best men and celebratory shot-gun salutes and may be officiated by ordained ex-cons... The receptions may feature mud-wrestling contests and mattress surfing… whatever that is. Finger-licking banquets may feature baked beans and roast squirrel.
Unfortunately the TV show, despite its claims, does not celebrate the beauty of country life and country traditions. It is rather a mocking spectacle that demeans and stereotypes people. The program thrives on absurdity and uncouth behavior.
The story Jesus tells us today from our text also features a wedding but it is not your big redneck kind of wedding.
In our story today, the grace of God is likened to an invitation to a wedding banquet.
I. God’s Grace is an extravagant demonstration of largesse. 22:1-3
The Kingdom of Heaven is like a King who prepared a wedding banquet for his son. He sent his servants to those who had been invited to the banquet to tell them to come, but they refused… Matthew 22:1-3
In Luke 14 Jesus had just been teaching about wedding feasts and banquets and had concluded by saying, “When you give a dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers and sisters, your relatives or your rich neighbors; if you do they will invite you back so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.” Luke 14:12-14
That comment prompted one of his listeners to say, “Blessed is the one who will eat at the feast in the Kingdom of God.” Luke 14:15
This comment about the feast in the Kingdom of God immediately brings to mind the passage in Revelation 19 about what we refer to as the Marriage Feast of the Lamb when Jesus receives his bride, the Church. That imagery is captured in religious artwork, I think most beautifully in the painting that is obviously in a celestial setting of a huge banquet table set in preparation for the Marriage Supper of the Lamb. It is a beautifully set with on a table that stretches as far as the eye can see with high-back chairs on either side as far as the eye can see.
This story may be a simple parable but the implication is that God, who is not willing that any should perish but that everyone should come to repentance, has invited everyone to come.
Generally, when a banquet is being planned and particularly so for a wedding reception, the host has a budget that allows for X number of guests and as they make their way in preparing a guest list decisions have to be made. Some people are included and others are not. Parents may be invited but the children are not. Aunt Daisy is invited but not her loser sixth husband. More often than not, I am amused by the conversations people have with advice columnists about who they must invite and whom they can justifiably exclude.
Apparently the banquet in our story is a banquet to die for. And getting an invitation was like being invited to the Royal Wedding.
On April 29, 2011 the world watched as Prince William and Catherine Middleton were married at Westminster Abbey in London. According to the Wiki people the Queen of England sent out three sets of guest lists for the occasion:
1. 1,900 people were invited to attend the ceremony in the Abbey.
2. 600 people were invited to attend a reception luncheon at Buckingham Palace.
3. 300 people were invited to attend a dinner that evening hosted by the Prince of Wales.
And the “festivus for the rest-of-us” took place in some 5,000 street parties scattered throughout the United Kingdom. I assume these were akin to loosely organized block parties for commoners throughout the realm.
Despite the elaborate nature of the Royal Wedding it was not considered a state affair so a lot more people were invited that were just friends of the couple than would normally have been permitted. But at any rate… an invitation to the Royal Wedding was an invitation to die for. To have been included on the guest list was huge and to be excluded was to be put in your place.
I’ve heard, and I am speculating, that in some cases invitations to such occasions are so sought after that invited guests have been known to sell their invitations to people who really, really, really want to be included.
To be included on a guest list is an honor and to be excluded is a disappointment… however in some cases to be excluded is a big fat relief! But that is not the case in this story. This is a banquet you do not want to miss. This banquet, like God’s offer of grace, is an invitation to an extravagant gift.
The grace of God is not something you want to miss.
II. God’s grace is not an e-vite to be ignored. 22:4-6
In our text Jesus said, “…but they refused to come.” And even after sending more servants to stress the amount of effort that had gone into preparation and the importance of attending, the story continues, “But they paid no attention and went off – one to his field and another to his business.” Matthew 22:3-6
In Luke the story takes a twist suggesting how they all began to make excuses for ignoring the invitation:
1. The first said, “I have bought a field and I must go and see it.” (Today he might say, “I just bought some houses in quick sales that I need to check out to see what I have to do to flip them and make some money.”
2. The second said, “I have just bought five yoke of oxen, and I am on my way to try them out.” Today he might say, “I just bought a big new Dodge Ram 350 Diesel Dually and I need to see how it pulls Floyd Hill with my fifth-wheel hooked on.”
3. The third said, “I just got married, so I can’t come.” Today he might say, “My wife wants me to do some stuff around the house so I’m all tied up today.”
Robert Louis Stevenson once said, “Perpetual devotion to what man calls his business is only to be sustained by perpetual neglect of many other things. (Leadership, Vol. 7, no. 4) Whenever we get wrapped up in or engrossed in or consumed by something, we do so at the neglect of or by neglecting other things.
The point Jesus is making is that despite the wonderfully generous nature of God’s offer of grace… there are obstacles that keep some people from accepting it.
They say approximately 500,000 tons of water rush over Niagara Falls every minute. On March 29, 1948, the falls suddenly stopped. The silence was so startling that those living within hearing distance of the falls were awakened. Apparently heavy winds had set the ice fields in Lake Erie in motion and tons of ice had jammed the Niagara River near Buffalo stopping the flow until the ice shifted some thirty hours later. (Merle Mees in Fresh Illustrations for Preaching & Teaching (Baker), from the editors of Leadership)
We block the flow of God’s grace into our lives when we allow other things, we assume to be more important, to take precedence. Over the years I have become increasingly aware that our country is Christian in perception only. Spiritual things are increasingly being supplanted and upstaged and set aside by other things. And I am fearful for the spiritual well-being of individuals and families who consistently prioritize other things as being more important than the nurture of their own spiritual lives and that of their children.
The point Jesus is making is that people have a way of prioritizing things and some things are simply more important to them than other things. And in our story, the King noticed when those he had invited refused his grace and began to make excuses for opting out.
Commentators point out that this is something less than a subtle message to the Jewish people to whom Jesus came and who rejected him. In John the bible says, “He came to his own people but they rejected him. In our story the King decides that his elaborate preparations will not go to waste… so he throws open the doors and tells his servants to bring everyone warm body they can find in to enjoy his banquet.
This gesture illustrates the expansive and embracing and inclusive nature of God.
III. God’s grace is expansive and embracing.
The King told his servants that the banquet was ready and those who had been invited, but refused to come, did not deserve to come. “So go into the streets and invite to the banquet anyone you can find.” And so they went and gathered all the people, the bad as well as the good, and the wedding hall was filled with guests. Matthew 22:8-10
In the parallel passage the servants were sent into the streets and alleys of the town to bring in “the poor, crippled, blind and the lame.” And when that did not fill the hall they were sent out again, “Go out to the roads and country lanes and compel them to come in, so that my house will be full.” Luke 14:21-23
Perhaps you recall the news story of The Runaway Bride? On April 26, 2005, Jennifer Wilbanks ran away from her Duluth, Georgia home in order to avoid getting married. Her disappearance was unexplained and dominated the airwaves until she phoned her fiancé from Albuquerque, New Mexico claiming she had been kidnapped. It all turned out to be false and she eventually sued her former fiancé for a share of the book deal money he had received for telling his story. He then countersued her for breach of promise and they all lived together happily ever after.
However there is a heartwarming story that came from about the same time period. When Katie Hosking broke off her relationship with her fiancé 12 days before the wedding, she and her family found themselves in a bit of a pickle. They had invited 150 guests and the reception dinner, costing over $6,000, required 60 days notice for cancellation. The wedding was off but the banquet was still on.
The Hosking family decided to have a party anyway. They invited 50 close family and friends and 40 homeless people from the Interfaith Shelter to come to the country club for a banquet…
They danced. They feasted on baron of beef, salmon, shrimp cocktail, fettuccine, and fruit. Strawberry shortcake replaced the wedding cake. And afterward they packed up the leftovers and sent it back to the shelter. And when it was over the almost bride said, “We had so much fun!” (Kenneth Peterson, Omak, Washington; source: The Wenatchee World, June 29, 2005) (An AP story)
The point of this little story is not that excuses were made to avoid having to attend the banquet… the point is who the bride and her family chose to include.
In our story today it is important to grasp the expansive and all-inclusiveness of God’s grace… a grace that extends fully into the margins of society and beyond to the deepest and darkest places on the planet. The Kind says, Bring in anyone and everyone you can find!”
Of course that was unsettling news to the Pharisees and religious leaders of the day who had little time for Jesus and his ways with the notorious sinners.
However, when a person accepts the invitation to receive God’s grace it is not without expectations.
IV. God’s grace is a gift with expectations. 22:11-14
In Matthew the King “noticed that among the guests was a man who was not wearing wedding clothes. He asked, “How did you get in here without wedding clothes, friend?” And the man was speechless. The text goes on to say that the King called the bouncers and “he was thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” Matthew 22:11-14
The guest who arrived unprepared made an egregious error… He was the original “Wedding Crasher.” He thought he could get in without properly accepting the invitation.
This is perhaps the stickiest of points in this story.
In our first church in Cottage Grove, Minnesota, we instituted our outreach program called Evangelism Explosion. It was an evangelism program that had come out of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. It was during an era when we were attempting to blend elements of relational evangelism and confrontational evangelism. And key to getting into a discussion about one’s personal relationship with Christ was in asking this question. “If you were to die tonight and stand before God and God were to ask you, ‘Why should I let you into my heaven?’ what would you say?”
Of course there were all manner of answers. “I’m a good person.” “I try to practice the Golden Rule.” “I was baptized and confirmed in the church.” “As people go, I’m as good as anyone I know.”
The conversation was intended to get around to explaining how it is important to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. And then we would point out that in I John 5:11 the bible says, “Whoever has the Son (Jesus) has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you in the name of the Son of God so that you may know you have eternal life.” And then we would turn to John 1:12 and explain that “to all who receive Jesus, to those who believe on his name, he gave the right to become children of God.”
Conclusion
The whole offer of grace thing hinges on accepting or receiving the invitation. It is not about whether the guests are wearing white gowns or black tuxedos. It is about whether the guests have received the Son or whether they are attempting to sneak in some other way.
In John 14 Jesus told his disciples about how he was going away to prepare a place for them and then he said something like, “I will come back and take you to be with me that you may be where I am. You know the way to the place I am going.” But the disciples did not get it and one of them said, “Jesus, we don’t know where you are going, how can we possibly know the way?”
Then Jesus said, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Another disciple interjected, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.” And then Jesus said, “Don’t you know me? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.”
In our story it was as if the King asked the guest in question, “Do you know my Son, Jesus?” And the man did not know what to say. He was speechless because he did not…
There is an old story about comedian Jack Benny. Apparently upon accepting an award he remarked, “I really don’t deserve this. But I have arthritis, and I don’t deserve that either.”
To a person in this room… not one of us deserves to be invited to the banquet but the doors have been thrown open to all and it is ours for the accepting. The only expectation is that we know the Son. “Do you know my Son?”
“Do you know the Son?”
May you have the power to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge… Ephesians 3:18-19
