A FRUIT-FULL MARRIAGE: FAITHFUL LOVE*
GALATIANS 5:13-26
Sermon Objective: Loving God and loving humankind is the pinnacle of faith and existence; all Spiritual virtues flow from these.
GALATIANS 5:13-26
13 You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. 14 The entire law is summed up in a single command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 15 If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
16 So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
INTRO:
It has been 4 years since we have done this together so I think it’s high time we do.
Husbands, please turn to your wives and repeat after me:
I, (name), take you (name), to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
Ladies, your turn:
I, (name), take you (name), to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
Husbands, you may kiss the bride. Go ahead! It’s okay to kiss her in church!
That seems like an appropriate way to start a sermon on the virtue of FAITHFULNESS. Those words you just recited are called “vows” … that means pledge or promise and they are some of the most important vows you will ever take. Maybe, if we recited them to our spouses a bit more often we would remember them and take them seriously. Maybe it would actually evoke faithfulness in some who are vulnerable to straying. With 27% of all adults in America having been through a divorce and statistics among Christians being about the same, it certainly couldn’t hurt!
It seems like more and more people forget Henry Ford's sage advice. When asked on his 50th wedding anniversary for his rule for marital bliss and longevity he replied, "Just the same as in the automobile business, stick to one model."
Someone once said, “expectations are premeditated resentments.” I am forced to admit that this is often true. Placing high expectations on a fallen human being can lead to great disappointments.
Nowhere is this more true than in marriage. Many come to marriage with expectations that are wildly out of sync with what can be realistically expected. We buy in to the “happily ever after” stories of our youth and expect the toad we’re dating will be magically transformed into Prince Charming the moment we say, “I do.”
You can call that a “premeditated resentment.”
Growth is essential for any marriage. Praying for, encouraging, and patiently waiting as growth happens is a sign that both parties in the marriage are mature and realistic. Seeking the Spirit of God’s influence and fruit within a marriage is a sure was to assure a long and happy relationship together.
Steven Gola the founder of divorcehope.com once said “The way we respond everyday to the various encounters with people and situations determines what kind of life we will have. The same situation can have two opposite outcomes depending on how we respond.”
If this statement has credibility anywhere it is in respect to … FAITHFULNESS; the Fruit of the Spirit is the relational, healthy, Godly way to respond.
You see, MARRIAGE IS MORE ABOUT BEING THE RIGHT MATE THAN IT IS FINDING THE RIGHT MATE. THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT MAKE YOU THE RIGHT MATE.
Your responses and choices clarify and illustrate your fidelity. Not only in the marriage bond but in other relationships too. Proverbs 16:7 goes as far as to suggest that even the adversarial relationships in our lives can be transformed by God’s presence. The writer says, “When a man’s ways are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him.”
Remember, the Fruit of the Spirit are core expressions of spiritual maturity. As God’s Spirit which indwells you transforms you, the relationship you are in will be influenced as well. Loving your neighbor is an indication of your love for God. And loving your neighbor requires the virtue of FAITHFULNESS.
Can you think of any virtue that is more like God than faithfulness? We all know FAITHFULNESS is to be deeply imbedded in our marriage relationships but are you aware it should be at the core of all your relationships? If God is there – FAITHFULNESS will be too.
SERMON
The Greek “faithfulness” (pistis) word is a derivative of “faith” (trust or confidence) and means “to be trustworthy.” Other words that might be used in its place are “commitment”, “reliability”, “trustworthiness.” It would be entirely appropriate to translate this as “the fruit of the Spirit is reliability, trustworthiness, or commitment.”
Pistis is an inner virtue that drives one to be true to purpose and reliable for a task. IT REFLECTS AN INNER CHARACTER THAT ASSURES YOUR SPOUSE THAT YOU ARE RELIABLE IN EVERY ARENA OF LIFE. You see, faithfulness extends much further into a marriage relationship than simply sexual fidelity. It is a sign of deep respect and honor. It is a tell-tale sign that love reigns.
In another place (1 Cor. 13:7-8) the same writer as Galatians says “[Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
That is faithfulness … faithful love.
You might find it interesting to do a search on how many times “love” and “faithfulness” are found together in Scripture. For example, the “Marriage Manual” I have encouraged you to read (the book of Proverbs) does it frequently.
o Proverbs 3:3 “Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.”
o Proverbs 14:22 “Do not those who plot evil go astray? But those who plan what is good find love and faithfulness.”
o Proverbs 20:6 “Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find?”
o Proverbs 20:28 “Love and faithfulness keep a king safe; through love his throne is made secure.”
A number of years ago, the Harry S. Truman Library in Independence, MO made public 1,300 letters that the late President wrote to his wife, Bess, over the course of a half-century. Mr. Truman had a lifelong rule of writing to his wife every day they were apart. He followed this rule whenever he was away on official business or whenever Bess left Washington to visit her beloved home town. Scholars examined the letters for any new light they may throw on political and diplomatic history. In doing so they almost missed the most significant things about them. The couldn’t see the forest for the trees … THE MOST IMPRESSIVE THINGS IS THE SIMPLE FACT THAT EVERY DAY HE WAS AWAY, THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES TOOK TIME OUT FROM HIS DEALING WITH THE WORLD'S MOST POWERFUL LEADERS TO SIT DOWN AND WRITE A LETTER TO HIS WIFE. (Bits & Pieces, October 15, 1992, pp. 15-16)
Let me make it clear that when I speak of the need for you to exhibit faithfulness I am not talking about “dogged determination.” I am talking about a virtue that saturates you … that becomes the real you … that changes the spiritual DNA of who you are.
Such virtue flows from the fountainhead of God’s Holy Spirit. It comes from “the love of God that has been shed aboard in your heart” (Romans 5:5) AND IT GOVERNS THE CONDUCT AND CONTEXT OF YOUR LIFE.
You see, I am talking about a “real” you that is a “new” you that only God can make.
WRAP-UP
So may I close by simply asking you some questions?
1. WOULD YOUR SPOUSE AND FAMILY (THOSE WHO KNOW YOU BEST) DESCRIBE YOU AS “TRUSTWORTHY”?
A college man once received a photograph from the young lady he was seeing. It was a picture of the two and them and on the back there was an inscription that read, “My dearest Tom, I love you with all my heart… I love you more & more each day… I will love you forever & ever… I am yours for all eternity…” It was signed “Diane,” and it contained a P.S.: “If we ever break up, I want this picture back…”
FRIENDS, WHEN CHRIST CALLS US & WE FOLLOW HIM, THERE’S NO “P.S.” ATTACHED … YOU ARE HIS AND HE IS YOURS!
Jesus’ faithful love towards us is the purest picture of faithfulness we have. “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’”
But Jesus is more than just a promise of faithfulness by God … he is also the character God wishes to (and will) impart to us as we keep in step with His Spirit.
2. IS LOVE AN ANCHOR FOR THE RELATIONSHIPS IN YOUR LIFE?
1 Cor. 13: 3 reads: “If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”
May I loosely paraphrase that by saying: “If you have dogged determination and unquestionable commitment but do not have love … it is nothing.”
You cannot separate the word love from God. “Love is of God” {I John 4:7} and love “is” God {1 John 4:8}. Love is the anchor of how God relates and responds to us.
You must not separate love from your human relationships either.
Do you remember this scene from “Fiddler on the Roof?” It is between Teyve and Golde:
Tevye: Golde … Do you love me?
Golde: Do I what?
Tevye: Do you love me?
Golde: Do I love you?
With our daughters getting married
And this trouble in the town
You’re upset, you’re worn out
Go inside, go lie down!
Maybe it’s indigestion
Tevye: "Golde I’m asking you a question..." Do you love me?
Golde: You’re a fool
Tevye: "I know..." But do you love me?
Golde: Do I love you?
For twenty-five years I’ve washed your clothes
Cooked your meals, cleaned your house
Given you children, milked the cow
After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?
Tevye: Golde, The first time I met you
Was on our wedding day
I was scared
Golde: I was shy
Tevye: I was nervous
Golde: So was I
Tevye: But my father and my mother
Said we’d learn to love each other
And now I’m asking, Golde
Do you love me?
Golde: I’m your wife
Tevye: "I know..." But do you love me?
Golde: Do I love him?
For twenty-five years I’ve lived with him
Fought him, starved with him
Twenty-five years my bed is his
If that’s not love, what is?
Tevye: Then you love me?
Golde: I suppose I do
Tevye: And I suppose I love you too
Both: It doesn’t change a thing
But even so
After twenty-five years
It’s nice to know
(i) That scene reminds me that you can have the right actions and not have love but that you cannot have love without it having the right actions.
(ii) Morever, it REALLY reminds that love is the preeminent objective. LOVING GOD AND LOVING HUMANKIND ARE THE PINNACLE OF FAITH AND HUMAN EXISTENCE.
“If you have dogged determination and unquestionable commitment but do not have love … it is nothing.”
3. IS THE GODLY CHARACTER OF THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT GROWING IN YOU?
Do you see God’s love shed abroad in your hearts (Romans 5:5) creating Godly character in you?
Let me ask this in another way:
(i) IS LOVE GROWING, MATURING, SPREADING WITHIN YOU?
(ii) IS LOVE CHANGING YOUR CHARACTER, CHOICES, RESPONSES, RELATIONSHIPS … THE VERY CONDUCT AND CONTEXT OF YOUR LIFE?
The Baptist preacher, Rev. E. V. Hill, pastors in Los Angeles and tells a personal story about the racial violence in downtown Watts. Another pastor in the community had already been killed because of his involvement in the racial tension.
Rev. Hill eventually got a threatening phone call and was told that if he did not cease his involvement in the racial conflict that he would be killed. They told him that they would put a bomb in his car.
The next morning when he woke up he noticed his wife was not there. When he stepped into the garage the car was gone too. Soon he saw his wife was driving up in the car. When he asked her what she was doing she said, “I just wanted to be sure any bomb would not explode on you.”
Rev. Hill said he never had to question his wife’s love. It was that kind of commitment and love that inspires someone to risk their life … to give their life.
Isn’t that the model of Christian character set by Jesus Christ? Isn’t that the evidence of the Holy Spirit’s presence in us? I think it is.
He who has ears
Let him hear
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** I am grateful and indebted to those who have shared their applications from the fruit of the spirit for marriage. I found the following authors particularly helpful: Rev. David Maxson of Embry Hills Church of Christ, Mr. Stephen Gla of Divorce Hope, and Paul Canner.
This sermon is provided by Dr. Kenneth Pell
Potsdam Church of the Nazarene
Potsdam, New York
www.potsdam-naz.org
