Introduction:
This is a picture of a quarrelling usher and a member of the congregation. When this member gets to the entrance of the church and finds that the usher mounting the entrance gate is his/her enemies and immediately turns away from entering the church, how would God view your relationship with that member if you are the usher?
Love – A New Commandment (John 13:34) About Love, Christ said in Mat 19:19; 22:37-39, Mark 12:31, “…,What is common in these verses read? “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” i.e. exchange of bodies between the two parties. At least, you can’t hurt your body in the other person. Also, in Luke 6:27, 32; (Love your enemies). The benefit of all these is in Luke 6:35, John 13:35.
Forgiveness – A New Instruction (Matt 6:12) About Forgiveness, Chris said in Matt 6:14–15; 18:21–22. The benefit of all these is in 1John 1:9.
Reconciliation – Its Purpose (Ephesian 2:14, 19)
There is a sharp difference between love, Forgiveness and Reconciliation based on dictionary definition, but in emotion and conflict management; Love is a bond, forgiveness restores any broken bond, but reconciliation ensures that the restored broken bond is kept and continually safe.
The simple truth whether you accept or not is that if you hold grudge against anyone, few things are bound to happen, which are:
1) Your righteousness will reduce (incomplete) James 3:18, hence you will not make heaven
2) Your prayers will not be answered Matt 6:12, 14-15; 7:7
3) If (2) above is true then, you are bound to remain in the same situation Heb 1:9 as you were before you were offended e.g.
• Expectant
• Employment
• Promotion
• Etc.
4) Just think of your situation and confirm whether you are yet to forgive anyone that has offended you. If this is true, then you are frustrating God’s grace Gal 2:20–21
5) Also think of your situation before and after or around the forgiveness saga or issue if things are the same or getting better or worse 1Cor 15:33–34
6) Eventually, the problems arising from the unforgiveness will begin to spread to other members of your friends or relatives, even your immediate family members Rom 10:3; 14:7
Lesson: Proverbs 28:13 “He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy”
The way out is:
1) To love
2) To show that you love truly i.e. physically, emotionally, financially, etc.
Synopsis: If you are so weak to forgive someone for killing your dog, breaking your cup, obstructing your peace, how would you then handle the anger that comes from you when you are told to train someone that will take your job in the office all in the name of Succession Plan or Backup Strategy?
Eventually, you might have to bow out of the company if advised and the next day you come to pick your belonging, he told the secretary to allow the person in and then should not stay for more than 5 minutes max?
God is love, if you don't love your neighbour as you should hence you have no God in you.
Any true forgiveness will be accompanied by or with a reconciliation meeting where both parties will shake hands and let all things go.
How would you describe the actions of a church member who returned home just because his so-called enemy was at the welcoming front desk of the church.
The usher is going to be punished for not reconciling with the member and also the member will also be punished for moving away from the God's presence to darkness and both if continued will end up in hell.
