Together we have been focusing on how to develop the fruit of the Spirit within our church so that we will be an alluring and attractive place to the world around us. As we’ve seen consistently, it is the “fruit” of the Spirit and not the “fruits” of the Spirit. There is only one fruit with nine related aspects that can’t be separated from each other. Today we’ll be focusing on the eighth aspect of the fruit of the Spirit - gentleness. We’ll set the stage by reading a story titled “Fussing, Fighting and Forgiving” from the book Home Town Tales by Philip Gulley.
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THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT IS…GENTLENESS
As we have done throughout this series, we need to begin by trying to define the word translated “gentleness” in Paul’s description of the fruit of the Spirit. That is actually a very challenging assignment because we really don’t have one English word that captures the essence of Biblical gentleness.
The Greek word used by Paul here is “prautes”. Depending on the translation, it is usually rendered either as “gentleness” like in the ESV and most other English translations, or “meekness” as in the KJV. But neither of those words really gives us the full essence of this Greek word. Perhaps the best way to get a feel for what this word means is to think of it as the perfect balance of strength and gentleness. A couple of examples will probably help us out here more than a formal definition:
• A powerful horse obedient to the reins. If you watched the Preakness yesterday, this is exactly what you witnessed. The powerful racehorses, which weigh well over 1,000 pounds, are under the control of a jockey, who only weighs slightly over one tenth of that weight.
• A guard dog which is friendly to the family owning him. Mary’s sister has a couple of Doberman Pinschers who I wouldn’t want to meet if I was an intruder in their house. But with those they trust, they are among the gentlest dogs I have ever seen.
In both cases there is great strength present, but it is tempered by a gentle spirit.
There is also an aspect of prautes that is demonstrated in our relationship with God. Vine describes it as “an inwrought grace of the soul; and the exercises of it are first and chiefly to God. It is that temper of spirit in which we accept His dealings with us as good, and therefore without disputing or resisting.”
Sometimes we can get a better feel for the essence of a word like prautes by focusing on its antonym. In the case of prautes, the opposite would be self-assertiveness or self-interest. So a person who has developed this kind of gentleness is not subject to emotional highs and lows because he or she is not occupied with self at all.
Obviously the best example we have of gentleness is Jesus. Look at Paul’s description of Him:
I, Paul, myself entreat you, by the meekness [prautes] and gentleness of Christ…
2 Corinthians 10:1 (ESV)
We see this confirmed by Jesus’ own words:
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle [noun form of prautes] and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30 (ESV)
Without a doubt, Jesus is the ultimate example of the perfect balance between strength and gentleness. Although He is fully God and could have employed His divine power at any time He wanted, while He was ministering here on earth He chose to keep that power under control and treat others with gentleness. This is quite apparent when we look at the way Jesus dealt with others. Several examples come to mind:
• The woman at the well in John 4. Even though this woman was living with a man that she was not married to, Jesus dealt with her gently as He revealed to her that He was the Messiah.
• The woman caught in adultery in John 8. Once again, Jesus dealt with this sinful woman in a gentle manner.
• In Luke 19, we read the account of how Jesus deals with a sinful tax collector named Zacchaeus by going to his house and sharing a meal with him and his friends.
In each of these cases, Jesus din not hesitate to confront the sin in the other person’s life, but He did it with gentleness. Although He certainly had the power to immediately judge each person for his or her sin and pour out His wrath, Jesus kept that power under control.
Jesus also clearly demonstrated the other aspect of gentleness that we looked at in His relationship with the Father. He accepted God’s dealings with Him while on this earth as good and He submitted to God’s plans without disputing or resisting. It is this aspect of the gentleness of Jesus that Paul is describing in this familiar passage:
Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Philippians 2:3-8 (ESV)
Perhaps more than any other character trait, it was the gentleness of Jesus that led to the sense of disappointment and disillusionment among some of His followers. Many of them, like Judas, were looking for a Messiah who would come in like a roaring lion and establish his kingdom by force. But instead, Jesus ushered in His kingdom as a gentle, sacrificial lamb.
Now that we have a better handle on this aspect of the fruit of the Spirit, let’s see if we can draw out some practical principles that will help us to develop this kind of gentleness in our body.
• Developing gentleness in the way we treat each other
1) God’s Word is to be handled with a spirit of gentleness
James deals with how gentleness is essential as we handle the Word of God within the body:
Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness [prautes] the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
James 1:21 (ESV)
James is very clearly addressing this instruction to believers here. So when he writes about the salvation of their souls, he is referring to the entire process of salvation. As we have discussed frequently, there are three aspects – past, present and future – of our salvation.
At the moment we committed our lives to Jesus, we were saved from the penalty for our sins in the past. We often refer to that as justification. We are being saved right now as we live our lives for Jesus on a day-to-day basis. We call that sanctification. And we will one day experience the full extent of our salvation, physically in the presence of Jesus. That is glorification.
James seems to primarily have in mind that present aspect of our salvation here. And the means by which we experience that aspect of salvation is by receiving with meekness, or gentleness, the Word of God. So exactly what does that look like and how can we experience that in a practical way?
The main way that we do that here at TFC is to employ a consistent deductive method of handling God’s Word. That requires that we begin with the Bible itself and view it in the context of the overarching theme of Scripture, which is:
The reconciliation of God to man through Jesus, the Messiah, by His mighty works.
When we are faithful to handle God’s Word in this manner, it guards against the tendency for us to approach the Bible with our own personal, pre-conceived systematic theologies or thoughts about the Scriptures.
As we pointed our earlier, gentleness is the opposite of self-assertiveness or self-interest. When we apply that to the study of the Scriptures, what it means is that none of us, including Dana or me, come to the table thinking that we have all the answers or with some pre-conceived agenda in mind. Our goal is not to prove our point or to persuade others to our point of view, but rather to work together to determine what God wants us to learn from His Word.
I’m really grateful for the opportunity to engage in handling the Bible in this manner every Monday morning with a group of men who are willing to study God’s Word with a gentle spirit. It’s a great atmosphere where everyone is free to think out loud, ask questions and share their thoughts without worrying that someone is going to embarrass them or belittle them in any way.
This is one of the main reasons that I don’t do much topical preaching. Although it can be appropriate at times, one of the dangers of that approach to Scripture is that I’ll take my own preconceived ideas and then search out verses or passages that I can use to support my position. So for the most part, I will continue to engage in expository preaching where we take large chunks of Scripture – often entire books of the Bible – and let the Bible itself determine our teaching.
2) Those who have sinned must be restored with gentleness
Because every local church body consists of sinful human beings, we are unfortunately confronted with the need to deal with open, continuous, unrepentant sin among believers in the body. That’s not something that any of us really want to do, but it is certainly necessary if we are going to be faithful to Jesus. But as we have the need to do that, we must always approach these situations with a spirit of gentleness. We’ve already seen how Jesus did that and Paul provides us with some further instruction in two of his letters:
Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness [prautes]. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.
Galatians 6:1 (ESV)
I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness [prautes], with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Ephesians 4:1-3 (ESV)
There are a couple of important principles that stand out here. First, in these situations, the goal is always restoration, not retaliation. And that leads directly to the second thing we see here which is that the other goal is to maintain unity within the body. And both of those goals are most likely to be reached when the process is handled with gentleness.
Gentleness certainly doesn’t mean that we ignore sin within the body or that we minimize it in any way. Undoubtedly the examples we looked at earlier in Jesus’ ministry demonstrate clearly that Jesus never condoned or excused sin. In fact, if we really have the other person’s best interest in mind, we must confront and deal with the sin in their lives.
But we can never approach those situations with any sense of superiority. In fact, as the Galatians passage shows, if we do that, we open ourselves up to being tempted to sin ourselves – especially to the sin of pride. We should be grieving, not rejoicing, over the sin of others in our body.
The third and final principle that we’ll look at in this area actually deals more with how we treat those outside the body, although it does also address how we treat each other.
3) We are to treat our opponents with gentleness
As Paul writes to Timothy, he devotes a substantial section to address how the body of Christ is to act in its dealings with those outside the body. We’re going to look at just a brief portion of that teaching.
And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness [prautes]. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will.
2 Timothy 2:24-26 (ESV)
Just as Jesus said we would, we live in a world that is openly hostile to Jesus and His followers much of the time. But we are not to respond in kind to those who oppose us. Instead we are to act with gentleness toward them. As Paul points out, that is the response that will be alluring and attractive to the world and perhaps lead to their repentance.
But unfortunately, the church in America is often guilty of violating this principle. A couple of recent well known examples serve to illustrate this.
On March 20, Pastor Terry Jones and the Dove Outreach World Center held a “trial” for the Quran which ended with a burning of a copy of that Muslim religious book. The result was hardly repentance. In fact, this event sparked a number of violent demonstrations throughout the Muslim world in which many people were killed and seriously injured.
Most of us are also familiar with the Westboro Baptist Church which is known for its protests at the funerals of United States servicemen. They claim that these deaths are God’s punishment upon the United States as a result of rampant homosexuality here in this country. But again, the result of their actions has certainly been to push people away from that kind of so-called Christianity rather than to lead people to repent and commit their lives to Jesus.
Again, we need to learn from the life and ministry of Jesus and how He dealt with His opponents. Although Jesus was often quite direct and forceful in His teaching, He was nonetheless gentle. We see this best in His actions on the cross. Although Jesus had the power to call down fire from heaven and destroy all of His enemies, He instead prayed that God would forgive them. Without a doubt that is one of the greatest examples of gentleness ever. Let that be our example as we deal with those who oppose the cause of Jesus.
• Developing gentleness in our worship
1) We are to proclaim Jesus with gentleness
Every week as we gather together to worship, we proclaim Jesus in many different ways. We do it through our music. We do it as we testify to His work in our lives and we do it as we teach the Scriptures.
All of us also have numerous opportunities to proclaim Jesus in our day-to-day lives as we encounter people who observe our lives and ask us about the reason for the hope we have.
I know that we’ve looked at 1 Peter 3 several times recently in our teaching here at TFC, but it certainly won’t hurt us to return there again because Peter provides us with some very clear instruction about how gentleness needs to be incorporated into the way we proclaim Jesus to others.
But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness [prautes] and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame. For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God's will, than for doing evil.
1 Peter 3:14-17 (ESV)
We’ve all heard the old adage that “you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” Apparently we get that saying from Ben Franklin’s “Poor Richard’s Almanac”, but its roots can be traced back even further to an older Italian proverb. But the concept clearly goes back even further because it captures the essence of what Peter is writing here.
There are really two reasons to proclaim Jesus with gentleness. The first is that it is much more effective than the alternative. I certainly experienced this in my own life. Back in college, before I became a believer, there used to be a lot of street preachers on campus at the U of A. But generally their proclamation of Jesus wasn’t carried out with a whole lot of gentleness. I wasn’t really attracted to someone telling me that I was a sinner and that I was going to burn in hell if I didn’t accept Jesus. In fact, that approach really made me even more antagonistic towards anything to do with Jesus.
But on the other hand, when a young man approached me while I was sitting out on the mall one day and shared some of that same information with me in a very gentle manner, I was much more eager to hear what he had to day. He still talked about sin and hell, but his gentle manner was much more appealing and alluring than my other encounters with the gospel.
But there is a second reason that Peter lays out for us here. When we proclaim Jesus with gentleness, we protect our conscience and our reputation. When others respond to our gentleness with hostility, they are the ones who are put to shame.
Although only God can ultimately draw any person to himself, there is certainly a sense in which the manner in which we proclaim the gospel can either bring life or break the spirit of the other person. This is how the writer of Proverbs expressed this principle:
A soft answer turns away wrath,
but a harsh word stirs up anger.
The tongue of the wise commends knowledge,
but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
The eyes of the Lord are in every place,
keeping watch on the evil and the good.
A gentle tongue is a tree of life,
but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
Proverbs 15:1-4 (ESV)
We can either have a gentle tongue and be a tree of life or we can use harsh words which break the spirit.
Let me just point out once again that this does not imply that we in any way water down the truth or obscure the dire consequences of failing to commit one’s life to Jesus. Like every aspect of the fruit of the Spirit, gentleness is primarily concerned about what is best for others. And certainly we don’t do anyone a favor by not being truthful with them about the consequences of sin and the resulting separation from God. But we need to be sure that we do that with gentleness.
Although it may seem like a contradiction to us, being gentle actually requires great strength. Those 115 pound jockeys who had to keep those 1000 pound horses under control during the Preakness yesterday certainly could testify to that. It takes a lot of strength to keep a powerful horse on track and headed for the finish line. But when that occurs it is a thing of beauty and well worth the effort.
The same thing is true in this body. Being gentle requires a lot of strength. It takes strength to handle God’s word with gentleness and restore a fallen brother or sister with gentleness or treat our opponents with gentleness or proclaim Jesus with gentleness.
But as Philip Gulley discovered, it’s well worth the effort when we see God brings different folks together and join them together in a radiant quilt that is so much finer than anything we could have made alone. Isn’t it exciting to be part of that process?
