Introduction
A young minister was losing his congregation to sleep during a rather dry sermon. To revive those napping in the pew, he said, I lived with a woman for over 17 years that was not my wife. The sleepy heads in the pew quickly woke up. He then said, She was my mother! A visiting minister was amused by the wit of the preacher and decided to try it on his congregation when he returned home from vacation. On his first Sunday back in the pulpit he opened with the same line. For 17 years I lived with a woman who was not my wife. He hesitated when he realized that he had forgotten the punch line. Finally after an awkward silence, he confessed, For the life of me I can't remember who she was.
Far be it from me today that I forget our mothers on Mother's Day. Susan Yates, wrote in Dr. James Dobson's Focus on the Family Magazine a few years ago, Satisfaction comes from having a lasting, positive impact on the lives of others. Nobody on earth even comes close to a mother for having the potential for that kind of influence.
Influence… I find myself enamored with that very theme this morning. For the last several weeks we have concentrated on Biblical instruction regarding kingdom construction, the shaping of God's purposes and plans in our lives. It has been a fulfilling study for me, personally. I trust that it has been for you, as well. Today, we turn the corner in our series as we again look at the events and training that would lead David the shepherd boy to become David, God's choice king of Israel.
Some background into our text this morning will assist us in our understanding…
David has been chosen and anointed to be king. He is God's man. He has conquered Goliath. He has overcome personal discouragement. He has become a leader to the distressed men of the nation and trained them in character and valor. Time after time, he has found refuge in God; strength of character and spirituality follows this man after God's own heart.
In those days, flocks of sheep and herds of goats were maintained by the wealthy along the pastoral countryside of Judah. David and his men have been protecting citizens from the raiding bands of Philistines as they did for Keilah in I Samuel 23. At the time the sheep were sheared, it was common for the owner of the animals to set aside a portion of the profit he made and give it to those who had protected his shepherds while they tended the sheep in the fields. It was a way of demonstrating gratitude for their guardianship.
David and his men have been faithfully serving the shepherds of Nabal. Word soon reached them that it had come time to shear the sheep, so David and his men are awaiting a gracious gift from Nabal for their work. There is a problem brewing and we are introduced to the source of a coming conflict in Nabal.
Nabal and his wife, Abigail, are mentioned in verses 2 and 3. Nabal is a very wealthy man; however, he is both harsh and evil in his dealings. His very name means fool. It is translated impious or wicked. Psalm 14:1 The fool has said in his heart, "There is no God." They are corrupt, They have done abominable works. There is none who does good. David was dealing with a man who lived his life as if he never had to reckon with God. He is a man who lives without conscience.
Abigail could not be more different from her husband. Their marriage is a study in contrasts. Her name means source of joy. Furthermore, it even suggests God's ownership. Her appearance and character are also described in that she is a woman of wisdom, intelligence, and elegance. She has beauty within and without. She's not ruled by her emotions, but balanced, prudent, and smart as a whip.
The conflict arises in verse 10 after David has sent his men to inquire into their payment from Nabal. Being the vile and wicked businessman, he refuses to pay up. Imagine how this sets with David. His initial response is given to us in verse 12 and 13…
400 men with swords ready! Talk about taking out a roach with a semi automatic. We have no indication that David intended to negotiate. Here's David, the one who refused to strike back at Saul. Here's David, the man after God's own heart. Here's David, the man who learned to wait upon the Lord in a cave. Here's David seeing red, driven by rage. He's had it up to here and now Nabal is about to get it here.
Now enters Abigail. Now enters the wisdom of a godly woman. Now enters a woman of influence who is about to re-chart David's course back to kingly grace and character. Abigail becomes a key person to effect the Lord's plans in David's life.
People of godly influence are invaluable provisions. They are the ones who add value to others. Whether it is a mother we honor today who has spoken hope and purpose into our lives, who has prayed for us without ceasing, or other influencers in our lives; a teacher, a father, or a friend. For David, the future king, bent on revenge, Abigail becomes a priceless intermediary.
Theme: The Lord will use people of godly wisdom to speak wise counsel into our lives that will keep us on course toward His kingdom purpose being realized.
Abigail's example involves 4 lessons about her influence…
1 Influence demonstrates resourcefulness. Vv. 18 - 19
The situation demanded a prudent response. When a dangerous and explosive situation presented itself in Abigail's life, she didn't hesitate in her actions. She didn't go empty handed. 400 angry men, further irritated by hunger, were out for vengeance. She came prepared. Remember that she not only had the looks, but she also had the brains.
She demonstrates the qualities and virtuous found of Proverbs 31:15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants. Her resourcefulness placed her in a position to make a difference. She was able to rectify the situation with David's and his men and extend a stay of execution for her wicked husband.
The very same actions should mark each of us who serve Jesus and care to extend grace to multitudes who might never know Him…
1.1 Ephesians 5:15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
1.2 1 Peter 3:15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;
1.3 2 Timothy 4:2 Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching.
People of influence have something to offer because of their ingenuity and prudence. They have ascertained situations. They have obtained perspective on difficult matters. They have learned how to respond in tedious, strenuous circumstances. They don't hesitate in anxious fear, but move forward with confidence and a sense of purpose.
2 Influence demonstrates a spirit of servitude. Vv. 23 - 24
John Maxwell has said, Servant-hood is not difficult to define; it is only difficult to achieve. But, the spirit of Abigail's approach to David is filled with servitude. Over the course of 10 verses, she addresses David as her lord 8 times and labels herself as a maidservant to him 6 different times. She is a study in wisdom. She doesn't come accusing David of barbaric action, but comes to appeal to his godly attributes…
She fell on her face… Literally, Abigail came in total surrender. It is as though she is bowing before royalty. The 3 fold repetition in verses 23 and 24 describes the incessant posture throughout her meeting with David.
Many acquaint influence or the ability to lead with a defined and exalted position. I believe it begins and ends with one, the servant's position.
Billy Graham said, Unless our belief in God causes us to serve, then our faith stands condemned.
The Apostle Paul cited a guideline of ministry leadership to the Corinthian Church in 2 Corinthians 1:24 Not that we have dominion over your faith, but are fellow workers for your joy; for by faith you stand. He says the issue is not apostolic selection, nor position as an evangelist or teacher, but the attendant's position.
Abigail also shoulders much of the blame on behalf of her wicked husband, Nabal. It was her submission to David that earned her a right to appeal to him. Imagine the sight of such a spread of food and the humility of her approach. David, my lord, I place myself on your mercy as your servant. Relent your anger.
That is truly the way we are to operate in the kingdom. It is a principle stated over and over again in Scripture. The way up in the kingdom is to first go down. It is modeled for us in Jesus; the good shepherd who leaves the 99 others to pursue 1 that is lost, the Savior girded with a towel and a wash basin. We are never more like Jesus than when we don the spirit of servitude.
3 Influence demonstrates personal integrity. V. 25
Integrity, by definition, implies whole-hearted devotion. It is in complete honesty that Abigail comes to David. Abigail fulfilled her loyalty to her husband even though he was wicked and, by all natural observation, deserving of all that he had coming to him. We never see her scheming to rid herself from the relationship with Nabal.
She is honest and forthright about the moral failings and weaknesses in Nabal. In somewhat of a humorous way she says, Well, what do you expect from a foolish man, whose name means fool? Nevertheless, her purpose is to avert certain death for her husband. It was her loyalty on display. I find it amazing that Abigail would intervene. Carnality could have taken over and she could have left Nabal vulnerable.
Consider for a moment that David could trust her because of her integrity. His heart reasoned with her plea because he was in the presence of a woman of integrity. Why could David trust Abigail? She came to him in honesty. She came to him in the exhibition of undivided loyalty.
Integrity is perhaps the greatest lesson one can learn regarding leadership. The ability to influence and lead is not a matter of position, but of credibility. Influence flows from who we really are. It comes from our heart; our true character.
Let me illustrate this with good ol' Barney Fife… He talks more than Andy… He postures more than Andy… He wears the uniform better than Andy… He carries the badge, the gun, the bullet in his pocket, and the attitude of a lawman, but he's never taken seriously. When there's trouble, people in Mayberry want Andy.
When there's trouble in someone's life, integrity ensures credibility that we can be trusted for counsel, hope, leadership. It tells others that we will do what we say, that we model devotion and loyalty. Integrity can't be an add on. It's woven into the fabric of character and godly reputation.
4 Influence demonstrates tremendous faith. Vv. 26 - 32
She expressed faith in God's purpose and work in David's life. Through her influence, she moved David into a proper response to the injustice perpetrated against him. She could say to David, David, I look at you and I see the next king. Don't ruin your record with a murder. You're bigger than that. Yes, you have been wronged, but murder isn't the answer. Turn from it. You don't need that kind of track record. She may not have known it, but in effect, she was telling David not to be like King Saul, the spear thrower who burned with anger.
One of the great challenges today is to believe in people. We almost make a virtue out of not trusting, but true people of faith see God's possibilities in others. It is the caring attitude to confront. It says, I care enough about seeing God build His purpose and design in your life to confront, to encourage, to call into account…
Do you see it in you spouse? Do you see it in your church? Do you see it in your teens? Do you see it in your pastor? Do you see it in your friend?
She expressed faith in what God could do in her own life. In verse 31, she acknowledges what God will do in David and requests for David to remember her service to him. Our world desperately needs people of faith… Our world desperately needs influencers of faith.
When the person who works across the aisle is served divorce papers and doesn't know where to turn, where will they turn? When a student begins to wrestle with thoughts of suicide, where will they find godly counsel? Will they find people who see God's best ready to be received by faith? Will they find people capable of instructing them in the way of Godly instruction?
David's response tells us why God had selected him for the throne… Vv. 32 - 35. Please note his response to Abigail in verse 35… The literal translation says, Go up to your house in peace. See I have listened to your voice and have lifted up your face. She was still in a submissive posture!
He's teachable. Because his heart was continually directed toward the Lord, God could trust him. He was back on course having turned from his anger. May God keep us as flexible and teachable. There is a happy ending in the story of David and Abigail…
Conclusion
Dorothy Law Nolte has noted, If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn. If a child lives with hostility, he learns violence. If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy. If a child lives encouragement, he learns confidence. If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice. If a child lives with love, he learns to love the world. The power of godly influence is the power to bless and leave the mark of God's instruction and wisdom. The Lord will use people of godly wisdom to speak wise counsel into our lives that will keep us on course toward His kingdom purpose being realized.
