Session 3: Our relationship to other Christians
Reading: Romans chapter 12 verse 9-13.
Ill:
• High in the Andes mountains is an enormous statue of Christ;
• Known as El Cristo de los Andes (The Christ of the Andes).
• It sits right on the border dividing Argentina from Chile,
• As long as the statue stands; The nations have pledged there will be peace between them.
• And so "Christ of the Andes" stands 14,000 feet above sea level,
• With one hand holding a cross and the other hand held up as though providing a blessing.
• Ironically, shortly after the statue was erected as a symbol of mutual peace,
• Controversy and bitterness broke out,
• The statue of Christ faced Argentina, and so had its back turned towards Chile.
• So the people of Chile were not very pleased!
• The tension was defused by a Chilean journalist;
• Who humorously concluded it was only right that the statue face this way,
• For "the people of Argentina need more watching over than the Chileans."
Some of us Christians need more watching over than others!
• If we are honest we have the same attitude as Christ;
• And therefore we don’t behave in a way that pleases Christ!
• Ill: Remember the words of Jesus himself when he said;
• “It would be by our ???????? that all men know that we are his disciples!”
Now Verse 9: starts with the word ‘LOVE’
Question: What is love?
Answer:
• Poster: "It is a warm puppy".
• Johnny Rotten: "Is 2 minutes 52 seconds of squishing noises".
• Dramatist Samuel Daniel: "A sickness full of woes".
• Humorist: Jerome J Jerome: "Like the measles, everybody catches it sometime".
• Coca Cola advert: "Love makes the world go round".
• Film Love Story: "Love is never having to say your sorry".
• Bard of Avon Shakespeare: "Love is blind,"
• Beatles: "All you need is love" …..and then they broke up!
When talking about God’s love for us and our love for each other:
• Christians stole an old word that was not in common use;
• And made it central in their preaching about God’s love and our love for each other.
• In Greek it is the word ‘Agape’.
• A type of love that is different:
• ‘Agape’ love has to do with the mind not just the heart,
• “Agape” love is not simply an emotion or feeling.
• It is a principle by which we deliberately live.
Quote Bible commentator James Montgomery Boyce:
"Love is not some mushy emotion that embraces all, forgives all, forgets all, and requires nothing.........
In fact, you will notice at once in our text Paul does not even define love.
He passes immediately to how love functions".
• New Testament love has to do with the will:
• In Romans chapter 12 Paul makes it quite clear that Christian love leads to action!
• Christian love is deliberate and it is purposeful,
• Christian love glorifies God and ministers to other people.
Now having spoken about spiritual gifts:
• We are given the opportunity to use those gifts,
• Remember that they are Quote: “Tools to build with, not toys to play with or weapons to fight with!”
• Ill: 1 Corinthians chapter 13 (great love chapter)
• Is given in exactly the same context (spiritual gifts for building up the body of Christ).
God gifts his people so that they can demonstrate the type of love mentioned:
• In the Church (The next 5 verses):
• In the world (Rest of the chapter).
• Verse 9-14 mention the type of love God requires from us,
• It is not a human love, but a Godly love.
• As well as the gifts of the Holy Spirit, we very much need the fruit of the Holy Spirit.
• Galatians chapter 5 verse 22:
22But the fruit (singular) of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Quote:
Love is the circulatory (cir-cu-la-t-ory) system of the spiritual body.
Which enables all the members to function healthy.
As I have said several times already, the love of God is different to human love:
• Human love is often mutualistic:
• I.e. We respond to the responder, we are kind to the kind, warm to the warm,
• And those who are not that way,
• We turn them off (and yet they are the ones who need loving the most).
• God’s love is different:
• 'Agape' love, unconditional love.
Quote: W.E. Vine. Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words:
"Christian love, whether exercised toward the brethren,
Or towards men generally,
Is not an impulse from the feelings,
It does not always run with the natural inclinations,
nor does it spend itself only upon those for whom some affinity is discovered".
Back to the 3 keys in verses 1-3:
• (1). Consecration (verse 1)
• Where we become available and find the motivation to love.
• (2). Transformation (verse 2)
• Where we get the power to love, God's love in us and trough us.
• (3). Evaluation (verse 3).
• We believe that we are a purposeful people, with a ministry to other individuals.
Now having said all that, let us look at the verses:
• In verses 9-13: Paul shows us how love acts (look at that this session)
• In verses 14-21 Paul shows us how love reacts (home work for next week!)
• So verses 9-13: How love acts;
• Notice in verse 9; that we are told two things about “agape” love.
(1). Love is genuine (verse 9): "Love must be sincere".
• Christian love is not to be an act, or a show.
• It is not to be hypocritical (as some versions translate it).
Ill:
• Prince Philip was once toasted at a banquet;
• The person leading the toast used two lines from the dramatist John Dryden:
• “A man so various that he seemed to be
• Not one, but all mankind's epitome!” (e-pit-ome).
• The room full of people were impressed;
• Describing the Prince as the “epitome!” (e-pit-ome), the embodiment of mankind..
• In fact the prince liked the lines so much he later looked up the rest of the poem:
• To his surprise what he thought had been flattery was actually an insult!
“Stiff in opinions, always in the wrong;
Was everything by starts, and nothing long:
But, in the course of one revolving moon,
Was chemist, fiddler, statesman, and buffoon”.
• Christian love should not appear to be two faced;
• Pretending to be nice, when really we feel the opposite way about a person.
Ill:
• Behind the Greek word for ‘hypocrisy’ is the idea;
• Of an actor who wears a mask to disguise his true appearance.
ill:
Leaving work or retiring.
• Everyone says; “What a good fellow”,
• When most people could not stand the person.
True love tells the truth, and is an expression of the truth.
• To speak and act in love,
• Means we should be honest with people, but we should also be gentle!
• If we are upset with someone, we need to resolve that problem,
• But to resolve it, to deal with the problem honourably and with the person gently.
Quote:
“The hand of honesty but wearing the glove of kindness”.
(2). Love is good (vs 9): "Hate what is evil; cling to what is good".
• A popular concept is that Christians should love everything.
• Ill: Petition opposing the mosque in London.
• A popular concept is that Christians should love everything.
• But this verse says; "No", we are to be discriminating.
• The Christian is to be an example in showing love,
• On the other hand, he / she is to; "Hate, abhor, be separate from what is evil".
Ill:
• A party of school children were being showed around a hospital;
• The nurse who was guiding them round asked if anyone had any questions;
• One child put their hand up and asked,
• "How come the people who work here are always washing their hands?"
• The nurse gave the answer; "They are 'always washing their hands' for two reasons.
• First they love health; and second, they hate germs".
Paul warns us about the germs of “evil” which we are to hate:
• Everyday you and I have to make choices;
• Do we take the good or the bad courses of action,
• Paul says that the mind that is being transformed (verse 2),
• Will cultivate a deep hatred for evil and a firm attachment to the good.
ill:
Charles Rhyrie, said when he was growing up:
• He lived near a river, a beautiful stream:
• But when it had rained,
• It swelled and enlarged itself,
• And was able to provide water for the farm land near by,
• But there were times when this river would leave its banks, it would swell to a flood stage.
• And when it swelled and spread it was destructive.
• He said love is like that:
• It has on one side the bank of truth, and on the other side the bank of discernment,
• And it must never leave those banks, to love wrong is to sin,
• To lose your discernment in your love is to weaken your faith not increase it,
• Love must be guarded by truth and discernment.
• And within those banks it is safe, above them it can even be destructive.
Quote: Bible commentator James Montgomery Boice:
"If we love as God loves-and we must if we are Christians-
then there will be things for us to hate, just as there will also be things we must love.
We will hate the violence done to people by whatever name- nationalism, ethnic cleansing, racial or religious pride, war, keeping the peace, even "necessity."
But we will love the humble and those who work for peace, yes, and even those who are guilty of the violence, because we will want to turn them from their ways.
We will hate lying, especially by those who are in important positions - CE0s and other heads of corporations, political figures, presidents, and even ministers.
We will hate what their lies do to others.
Yet we will love the truth and will at the same time also love those who are lying, for we will see them as people who need the Saviour.
That is what love does. Love hates evil - an intentionally strong word.
But love also clings to what is good.
The Greek word rendered cling in some of its forms means to glue. So the idea is that true love will bond us to the good. We will stick to it like epoxy".
In verses 10-13 have 8 expressions of how love should be expressed:
(1). Love is affectionate (Verse 10):
“Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.”
Paul uses two family words in this short sentence:
• “Devotion” is the Greek word used to describe the love of parents for their children.
• "Brotherly love" is the Greek word used describes the deep affection between brothers:
• Not a general mankind, type of brotherly love,
• But family, blood related, brotherly love.
Ill:
• At the wedding reception the young bride took her new husband by the hand;
• And led him over to an old woman who sat in a chair busily crocheting.
• “Granny,” she said, touching the old woman’s hand affectionately,
• “This is my new husband.”
• The old woman eyed him critically for a long moment,
• Then asked abruptly, “Do you desire children?”
• Startled by her bluntness, the young man blushed and stammered,
• “Well-uh-yes, I do very much.”
• “Well,” she said, looking scornfully at the large tribe gathered around the reception tables,
• “try to control it!”
Paul is teaching here that:
• The kind of love we SHOULD express within our families,
• Is to be the kind of love God expects for us to express within the local Church:
• The church, is first and foremost the family of God,
• And each member of that family is important, with no distinctions, no discriminations.
ill:
• Great example of this all-embracing love in this letter;
• Flick over for a moment to chapter 16 verse 22-23:
• On first reading it is just a list of names, as interesting as reading the telephone directory.
• But each of those names are owned by a person, each person has a story to tell.
• Ill: Chapter 16 Verse 22: we have Terius.
• Tertius was the secretary who wrote down Paul’s dictation,
• Notice he "Sends his greetings".
• Question: What was unusual about that?
• Answer: Tertius was a slave (a living tool, somebody who had no rights!)
• Ill: Chapter 16 Verse 23: we have Quartus.
• Quartus (means 4) because he was a slave!
• But notice he is called "Our brother" - Not slave, but equal with them.
• Quote: “Only in the Christian Church was a slave equal with his master!”)
• This is the early church where "All" meant "All".
• Christians practised what they preached.
Quote: Galatians chapter 3 verse 28:
"We are no longer Jews or Greeks or slaves or freemen or even merely men and women,
But we are all the same, we are Christians, we are one in Christ Jesus".
Let’s bring this verse up to date:
Question: Do you treat everyone the same?
Answer: Me neither!
• We have favourites, that's inevitable:
• We naturally click with some folk, while others just don't suite our personalities.
• You and I must make a constant effort to break out of our nice circle of friends;
• We are not an exclusive club, we are a family!
(2). Love is humble (Verse 10):
"Honour one another above yourselves"
• Showing respect to someone,
• Realising that they are as valuable to God and to the fellowship, to the Church as you are!
Ill:
Me Church video clip.
• There is no such thing as ME Church!
• It is HIS Church.
• You are only part of it (vs 1) because of HIS mercy!
• So forget self and think Christ!
Quote: The former Archbishop of Canterbury William Temple, “Christ in His Church”
“Humility does not mean thinking less of yourself than of other people, nor does it mean having a low opinion of your own gifts.
It means freedom from thinking about yourself one way or the other at all.”
• Honouring others above yourself:
• Our love is to be:
• Real and genuine, we must love honestly and with humility.
• We can only do that, as we honour, value, respect others be
Quote: William Barclay writes:
"More than half the trouble that arises in the church concerns right places and prestige, someone has not been given his or her place, someone has not been thanked, someone has been neglected,
Someone has been given a more prominent place on the platform, than someone else and there is trouble.
One of the marks of the truly Christian individual has always been humility".
(3). Love is eager to serve (Verse 11):
"Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervour serving the Lord".
Ill:
• Paul uses an interesting choice of word in this verse:
• It’s the Greek word 'Zeo'; which means "to boil, be hot" ill: Gas kettle (better cuppa!)
• It literally means;
• We must keep our Spirit at boiling point, we must make sure the heats stays turned on.
• In other words we are to avoid being lazy, complacent, indifferent.
• We are not to be spiritual Homer Simpson’s (or Andy Capp’s)!
Back to verse 1-3:
• Daily sacrifice, consecration:
• No real consecration, we become lazy, slothful and careless.
• Instead of that transformation taking place, we allow self to rule again.
• Instead of a desire to be involved for the Lord, we do what we want,
• A form of Christianity that pleases us,
• Perhaps more than it pleases God.
But if we are consecrating our lives and living in the light of God will:
• 3rd key evaluation: we realise we can meet the needs of others.
• Serving others whether or not we receive personal gain or applause.
(4). Love is joyful in hope (Verse 12): "Be joyful in hope".
Ill:
When Alexander the Great was setting out upon one of his eastern campaigns:
• He was distributing all kinds of gifts to his friends.
• In his generosity he had given away nearly all his possessions.
• One of his friends said to him: "Sir, You will have nothing left for yourself".
• Alexander replied: "Oh, yes I have, I still have my hopes".
• The Christian should essentially be an optimist:
• But too many of us are pessimists!
Quote:
“Twixt optimist and pessimist
The difference is droll:
The optimist sees the doughnut,
The pessimist sees the hole”.
• Too many Christians find it easier to dwell on the negative, than the positive?
• For too many the glass in always half-empty, never half-full!
Ill:
• A couple have twin sons,
• One of whom is an optimist and the other was a pessimist,
• The parents tried to even things out for their birthday,
• So they gave the pessimist a state of the are Ipod (or hi-fi system for the oldies!)
• When he unwraps it,
• His faces changes to a look of disappointment and he starts to complain;
• “With the price of downloads (CDs or L.P.’s) I’ll never be able to afford any!
• And you’ll soon be moaning about the noise it makes anyway….”
• The second son, the optimist opens his present;
• Contained inside the beautiful wrapping paper is a bag of horse manure.
• As soon as he unwraps it, he leaps into the air with joy, crying with excitement,
• “There’s a pony on its way!”
Quote The great reformer Martin Luther:
“All which happens in the world happens through hope.
No farmer would sow a seed of corn if he did not hope it would spring up and bring forth the ear.
How much more are we helped on by hope in the way to eternal life”
• We have a living hope here and now – Jesus Christ,
• We have a future hope – heaven!
• Even when we are unable to rejoice in circumstances
• We can still rejoice in the Lord,
(5). Love is patient in affliction (Verse 12):
"Patient in affliction".
Paul says that Christians too need to be "Patient" in hard times.
• A positive attitude when trials and troubles come to us.
• Because as sure as ‘eggs are eggs’, they will!
Ill:
• Anne Mansfield Sullivan had a host of folks telling her:
• That the blind 7 year old brat she was teaching was just not worth it.
• Anne persisted in spite of:
• Temper tantrums, physical abuse, meal time madness & even thankless parents.
• In her heart she knew it was worth the pain:
• Within 2 years the girl was able to read and write in Braille.
• She ultimately graduated from Radcliffe college,
• Where Anne Sullivan had spelled each lecture into her hand.
• The name of that pupil was 'Helen Keller':
• Who then devoted the rest of her life to aiding the deaf and the blind.
• Anne Mansfield Sullivan was "Patient" against the hard going.
• She displayed a positive attitude and in time she reaped the rewards!
• A positive attitude when trials and troubles come to us.
• Because as sure as ‘eggs are eggs’, they will!
Note: Remember that as Christians we get more trouble not less:
• (a). Everybody (Christian and non-Christian) in life experience hardships,
• That’s the result of living in a fallen world!
(b).
• Jesus warned us (John chapter 16 verse 33) that
• “In the world you will have trouble” or “ tribulation” so expect to tribulate!
(c).
• Paul wrote to Timothy telling him (2 Timothy chapter 3 verse 12);
• “EVERYONE who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted”,
When difficulties come along:
• The Christian should not give up, but look up! Stick at it
• e.g. Hebrews chapter 12 verse 1b-2:
“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith,
who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart”.
Joke:
• One wit has said; if you are ever tempted to give up,
• Just think of Brahms.
• He took seven years to compose his famous lullaby.
• The problem was………he kept falling asleep at the piano!
ill:
• More seriously - when complete deafness began to descend upon Beethoven,
• And life seemed to be one unbroken disaster,
• He is on record as saying;
• "I will take life by the throat".
Question: How can we be patient and positive?
Answer: is the next two expressions of love:
(6). Love is faithful in prayer (Verse 12):
"Faithful (Persevering) in prayer"
• Quote: Charles Spurgeon:
• “By perseverance the snail reached the ark”.
• The Greek word translated here as "Faithful”: Means: "To attend to it constantly".
• Constant help to help us through our times affliction, to give us joy in our hope.
Ill:
• A father was walking past his young granddaughter's room one night;
• When he saw her kneeling beside her bed,
• Her head was bowed and hands folded,
• But instead of praying she was repeating the alphabet.
• "What are you doing?" he asked her.
• She explained, "I'm saying my prayers, but I couldn't think of just what I wanted to say.
• So I'm just saying all the letters of the alphabet,
• And God can put them together however he thinks best."
Ill:
• Arlo who is a good little prayer, but one night he was very tired and prayed:
• “Lord you know all the things I mentioned last night, well same again!”
We need to be "Faithful (Persevering) in prayer"
Quote John Bunyan
“You can do more than pray, after you have prayed,
but you cannot do more than pray until you have prayed.”
Remember:
• When we pray for those who irritate us, trouble us, even hurt us.
• We are inviting God into the situation to change them and more importantly US!
Ill:
• If you run a magnet over a bunch of iron filings and they all stand to attention,
• Or move to the right or to the left.
• Long before the magnet makes physical contact with the filings,
• Something is happening.
• Why?
• Because an invisible power, magnetism, is affecting them.
• In the same way, prayer,
• Which is invisible and spiritual, affects that which is visible and physical.
Remember:
• When we pray for those who irritate us, trouble us, even hurt us.
• We are inviting God into the situation to change them and more importantly US!
(7). Love is generous to needy people (Vs 13):
"Share with God's people in need".
Difficulties and afflictions in life can either:
• Draw us away from God and from his people.
• Draw us closer to him and to his people.
• Ill: Troubles can either be a wedge or a clamp,
• E.g. Force us apart or closer together.
Paul encourages us to allow troublesome situations and circumstances:
• To draw us closer to God’s people.
• His advice is: "Share with God's people in need".
Practical sharing with God's people does two things:
(1). Stops us dwelling on our own problems.
Ill:
• A woman, donating a Communion Table to her local church,
• She impressed upon the pastor her wish for the gift to remain anonymous.
• But she was greatly troubled
• When the beautiful carved table was put in place in time for the next Communion service.
• “I told you I wanted the gift to be anonymous,” she said, taking the pastor aside.
• “So it is,” he replied.
• “No it’s not,” she cried.
• “It says clearly on the front of the table ‘In Remembrance of Me’.”
When difficulties arise it is so easy to be taken up with ourselves:
• And as we look inside,
• We tend to exaggerate or own difficulties, and to feel we are getting a raw deal.
• Self pity can so easily take over.
• We can easily become depressed, and feel sorry for ourselves.
• But encountering other people,
• Lifts our eyes from US (within) and means we start to look at others (without).
(2). Helps us to see our problems and difficulties in comparison with the needs of others.
• What we thought were spiritual mountains in our lives,
• Compared to other people s problems, we suddenly realise they are only molehills.
Quote:
"Often it is by lifting the burdens of others do we lose our own".
Paul reminds us in these verses that true love is generous:
• And true love is also practical, it moves us to meet the needs of others.
• Generosity in giving time, our company, some friendship to someone who needs it.
(8). Love is hospitable (Vs 13b) "Practise hospitality".
• An open home reflects an open heart!
• The Greek word Paul uses here for "Hospitality" is "Philoxenia":
• It actually means "Love of strangers":
• People who are foreign to or different from us.
Ill:
• Rome was a ‘Mecca’ for merchants and visitors from all over the world,
• It was not safe or desirable to use the local inns,
• So Paul encourages the Roman congregations to offer hospitality to these people.
• For some would drain their finances and time, it required a huge resource of sacrificial love
For many of us that kind of love fights against our prejudices:
• We don’t mind an open home for selected friends, but for everyone!
• Quote: Remember what Jesus said in Luke 14 verse 12-14:
Then Jesus said to his host, "When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbours; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid.
But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed.
Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."
Note:
• Great thing about ‘genuine’ fellowship is that the food is not all that important!
• Paul did not say throw a feast or a party,
• He said have an open house which reflects an open heart.
• In other words share what you have, share your company, your love.
• My punch line is simple; friend or foe;
• Who are you showing hospitality too!
This section of Romans chapter 12 now ends and another one begins:
• Verses 9-13: Paul shows us how love acts.
• Verses 14-21 Paul shows us how love reacts.
