THE WOMED MAN
“OPEN HEART INTIMACY”
“HER MANIA”
Text: Songs of Solomon 5:1-8
Introduction: “FAITH~vs~SEX”
This is a piece of the scriptures that we usually ignore. I believe that most tend to ignore it because it is so hard to figure out what it is doing in scripture – scripture is supposed to be about God, who He is, and his interaction with humanity. What is this sensual love song doing in the midst of it God’s Holy Word? This song is not just a love song – in his introduction to the Song. We don’t read very far in the Song of Songs before we realize two things: one, it contains exquisite love lyrics, and two, it is very explicit sexually. This is why we’ve generally stayed away from it – we don’t like to mix faith and sex.
The Song, in other words, makes a connection between marital love and sex – a very important and very biblical connection to make. There are some who would eliminate sex when they speak of love, supposing that they are making it more holy. Others, when they think of sex, never think of love. The Song proclaims an integrated wholeness that is at the center of Christian teaching on committed, wedded love for a world that seems to specialize in loveless sex.”
TEXT EXERGETION METHODOLOGY
Just before we get into it, I need to talk about how to read the scripture. There are some people who read the song as only a metaphor for the relationship between God and his church, and it is that, and we will get to that, but it is not only a metaphor, nor is it first a metaphor, it is first and foremost a love song that Solomon wrote for a specific woman in a specific time. And it is a beautiful and God-breathed love song. To not know this is to miss the song altogether. This is always the way that we must read scripture – take the most obvious reading first – even if it goes against our theology, or our sensibilities. Take the most obvious reading first, and struggle with that against the backdrop of the rest of scripture and the illumination of the Holy Spirit.
I. AN EXPECTED APPROACH (4:16)
Waiting is good. Romantic love and sexuality is a creation and a sacred gift from God. If nothing else the Song gives us a great model of how. If you have lost the ability to romance your spouse you should sit down and read the Song daily for a few weeks – with the illumination of the Spirit it can’t but help you love your spouse better and more passionately. Notice that in verse 16 the Bridegroom speaks of His request for the wind to blow the fragrance of his loved one his way. Though many men wont admit it, a woman’s smell can cause great arousal and expectation within their sexual perception.
(Rd.vs15) Solomon’s bride was as refreshing to him as a fountain. Most relationships begin that way. Sometimes the familiarity that comes with a relationship causes us to forget the overwhelming feelings of love and refreshment we shared at the beginning. Some people approach one another in such a fashion that can be forecasted by all who really know them. In order to enlighten the outlook as well as the outcome of your relationships, your significant other should expect your approach to be fresh, new, inviting & invigorating. She should look forward to the gift you have to present to her with great expectations.
II. AN EXPOSED APPETITE (5:1-2)
“I am come into my garden, my sister, my spouse”. Solomon acknowledges something that most couples (married & unmarried) don’t seem to understand. This is the fact that before you became intimately involved with each other, you were intimately involved with God. We are God’s children first and far-most, before we become each others spouses. 1Pet.3:7 This text gives indication as to the results of our un-Godly conduct towards one another. Even as parents don’t reward children who are unruly towards each other, so too does God govern his children accordingly.
Within our text we must realize that some time had passed since the wedding, and the girl felt as though some indifference had developed in their relationship. She had become cool towards her husbands advances, and by the time she changed her mind and responded to him, he had left. Her self-centeredness and impatience, though brief, caused separation. 1Cor.7:4-5 Paul makes it clear that both men & women have a sexual appetite that must be fulfilled. Spiritually, our bodies belong to God when we become Christians. Physically, our bodies belong to our spouses when we become married. God designed marriage so that our bodies can eat when hungry!!
III. AN EXPRESSED AGONY (vs.3-8)
This particular incident indicates that there was a little turbulence within the relationship. It is inevitable that, with the passing of time and the growth of familiarity, a relationship will start to lose its initial sparkle. Glances and touches no longer produce the same emotional response. Conflicts and pressures creep in, causing you to lose your tenderness toward your significant other. The world is not a haven for lovers; in fact, external stress often works against the marriage relationship.
Vs.6 opens with a chill of rejection from the Bridegroom. Women don’t handle rejection as well as men & men are not as patient as women. While a man is always sexually ready, a woman is not always ready for sexual relations. God designed her to be on a four season cycle. You can always tell when its summer (she’s hot). Then comes autumn. This is when the woman acts a little more reserved (not as wild). Now winter arrives and the man feels as if he’s been left out in the cold. Finally spring comes around and things warm up & things are new again. As a receiver women tend to inhale the aroma of they’re mate into their very spirit man…incubate that aroma & issue that aroma back in a more powerful sent.
**CONCLUSION**
LOVE SICK (Eph.5:28)
SHOWING AFFECTION IS EXPRESSING ONE’S AFFECTION IN LITTLE WAYS. MANY MEN DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO THIS BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T HAVE FATHERS WHO SHOWED AFFECTION TO THEIR MOTHERS. HOPEFULLY, THEIR SONS WILL BE BETTER AT IT. MANY WOMEN JUST WANT TO GET SEX OVER WITH BECAUSE THEY AREN’T BEING GIVEN THIS KIND OF AFFECTION. THE WOMAN MAY HATE THE EXPERIENCE AND THEN WALK AWAY FROM IT WITH BITTERNESS BECAUSE WHILE THE MAN HAS BEEN FULFILLED, HE HASN’T TRIED TO FULFILL HER NEEDS. WOMEN HAVE SAID “I FEEL AS IF I’M BEING USED”. PAUL SAID THAT A HUSBAND SHOULD “love their wives as their own bodies”. AFFECTION IS SOMETHING THAT THE MAN SHOULD SHOW TOWARDS HIS LOVER EVEN AS HE SHOWS TOWARDS HIMSELF. A MAN WHO IS NOT AFFECTIONATE TOWARDS HIS MATE HASN’T LEARNED HOW TO LOVE HIMSELF!!!
