I read a story about a woman who told a friend that she wanted to get a divorce. She was full of hatred toward her husband. “I just don’t want to get rid of him. I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has hurt me.” Her friend suggested an ingenious plan, “Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every good thing. Go out of your way to please him. Make him believe you love him. After you’ve convinced him that you cannot live without him, then drop the bomb. Tell him that you’re getting a divorce. That will really hurt him.” So, for two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcing and sharing. Then, her friend called her up. “Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?” She exclaimed, “Divorce? Never! I discovered I really do love him.” Her actions had changed her feelings. Motion resulted in emotion.[1]
Here we see that love is not just a noun. It is more of a verb. It is not just an emotion. It calls for action. This morning we will look into the last character quality in “Our Pursuit for Our Growth” series. Let us read 2 Peter 1:5-7. “For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love.”[2] Last week, we talked about “brotherly affection.” We saw that a transformed life leads to transformed relationships. We are to love with a pure and passionate love. This morning, as we study “love,” we will dig deeper into one of the verses I quoted last week. “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.”[3] Let us pray…
In the Greek, the word “love” in 2 Peter 1:7 was “agape.” If you remember, the Greek word for “brotherly affection” was “phileo.” So, we are to add “agape” or “love” to “phileo” or “brotherly affection.” Actually, there is not much difference between “agape” and “phileo.”[4] These words are synonymous or really close in meaning. It’s like “huge” and “large” or “tiny” and “small.” But since Peter wrote that we are to add “agape” to “phileo,” he must be emphasizing a key difference in meaning.[5] According to the Bible Exposition Commentary, “When we have brotherly love, we love because of our likenesses to others; but with agape love, we love in spite of the differences we have.” Phileo love is reciprocal. It is a mutual love. I love you because you love me. I love you because I like you. But agape love is sacrificial. It is a unilateral love. I love you even if you don’t love me in return. I love even if I don’t like you. According to the Bible Knowledge Commentary, “Whereas brotherly kindness is concern for others’ needs, love is desiring the highest good for others.” Someone pointed out that we were never commanded to phileo one another but we are commanded to agape each other.
With that in mind, let us read again 1 Peter 4:8. “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” We already saw that the adjective “earnestly” describes “the taut muscles of an athlete who strains to win a race”.[6] We are to love all-out. We are to give it our best shot or our best effort. In short, our love must be passionate. Now, how do we know if we love passionately?
First, passionate love must be a PRIORITY. Circle the phrase “above all” in 1 Peter 4:8. If we are passionate about loving a person, we make that person our priority. Note that it says “keep loving”. It is in the present tense. That means we must it our lifestyle to love. It is a commitment to love. It is also in the active voice. That means we must be intentional in loving one another. It is never accidental. It is a choice to love.
Love must color everything we say or do. That’s why it is possible to serve in the church and not love the Lord and the people we are serving. Without love, service becomes a duty. It is possible also to attend worship services and not love the Lord and even the people who are attending with us. Without love, attendance becomes a burden. Love must be the reason why we do what we do or why we say what we say. Passionate love must be a priority.
Second, passionate love must be PROTECTIVE. Look at the explanatory clause at the end of the verse: “since love covers a multitude of sins.” Peter here quoted Proverbs 10:12. “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.” Note how hatred and love colored everything. We stir up trouble because we have hate in our hearts. We cover the offense because we have love in our hearts. The Contemporary English Version goes like this: “Hatred stirs up trouble; love overlooks the wrongs that others do.”
What does it mean to cover an offense or to overlook the wrongs that others do? It does not say cover up an offense. It says cover all offenses. It does not say that we ignore the wrongs that others do. It says that we overlook it. As I have said before, that doesn’t mean that we turn a blind eye towards the sin. It means that we don’t make an issue about just about everything.
According to the Bible Exposition Commentary, “Love does not condone sin; for, if we love somebody, we will be grieved to see him sin and hurt himself and others. Rather, love covers sin in that love motivates us to hide the sin from others and not spread it abroad.” We will not cover up. We will confront. We will just control who gets to know what.
That’s the wisdom behind the instructions in Matthew 18 on how we confront a brother who sins. [Show “Matthew 18 Conflict Resolution Animation from icorvi.org”][7] The number of people who gets to know about the problem depends on the response of the one being confronted. That’s why it is wrong to gossip. We don’t have control on who gets to know what when we gossip. It actually does more damage than good when we spread rumors. But we really help the person recover from his error when we limit the number of people who gets involved in the confrontation. That’s why passionate love must be protective.
So, first, passionate love must be our priority. Second, passionate love must be protective. Lastly, passionate love must be PRACTICAL. Look at the next verses: “Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace”. I believe they are connected because of the phrase “one another”. Verse 8, “keep loving one another”. Verse 9, “Show hospitality to one another”. Verse 10, “use it to serve one another”. Verse 8 gives us the motive, that is, love. Verse 9 gives us the manner, that is, meeting people’s needs. Verse 10 gives us the means, that is, using our gifts to serve others.
Remember that during those times there was a great persecution. So, just allowing persecuted people in your house posed a great risk. According to the Bible Knowledge Commentary, “During times of persecution, hospitality was especially welcomed by Christians who were forced to journey to new areas.” There were only few hotels at that time. And when you are on the run, you can’t bring much of your possessions. So, these persecuted believers could not really afford those ancient hotels. It would be a great help when people host them in their homes. That’s why verse 9 commands us, “Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.” That took a lot of guts because even those who are hosting them were also persecuted. They themselves needed help.
So, how can we apply verse 9 nowadays? One way is to find a practical need. And then we meet that need even if we ourselves needed help in meeting our own needs. I think we don’t need to wait until we are capable of helping before we actually help. If we can’t help people now even if we are needy, then we can’t help then even if we already have the capacity to do so. What we need is not a bigger budget but a bigger heart to meet people’s needs.
Verse 10 gives us another way to love practically. “As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace”. This verse is talking about spiritual gifts. Yet, we can also say that since we received from God our talents, skills and gifts, we are to use it serve others. God already equipped us to meet the needs of one another. Out of love, we must seek to meet people’s needs with the gifts that God gave us. When we do that, we love not only through words but also through works.
Brothers and sisters, passionate love must be our priority. It must be protective and practical.
Let us pray…
[1]Adapted from http://bible.org/illustration/wife-who-wanted-divorce
[2]All Bible verses are from the English Standard Version, unless otherwise noted.
[3]1 Peter 4:8.
[4]See D.A. Carson’s “Exegetical Fallacies.”
[5]It is a fallacy to make much of the difference of agape and phileo every time it appears. It is also a fallacy to insist on it being synonymous every time. Context (particularly author’s intention) must rule.
[6]The Bible Knowledge Commentary.
[7]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLjUq5pJdQs
