Breaking Free
Part 3: Priority of Prayer
Pastor Ryan Akers
3rd and final message of Breaking Free today. We’ve been looking at the misconceptions about the church. Week 1 was titled a people with purpose. The church is not an organization but rather a people with a purpose to love God, love people. Last week was called parents with passion. It was a challenge for the parents, grandparents and empty nesters to break free of the misconception that the church should be the primary vehicle for our children’s spiritual growth rather than parents investing in their kids spiritual lives by living out the faith the church is trying to teach their kids how to have. If you’ve missed any of these messages you can download them online at our church website www.sandlakechurch.org.
The final message today is about prayer and breaking free of the misconception that the practice of prayer is only for Sundays, before meals, or when we desperately need help. Now I want to start with a confession to you that will either shock you or it may make you feel relieved. I have always had a terrible prayer life. Prayer is not something I have ever been good at being consistent with. And I’m willing to bet there are many of you who could relate to this struggle of taking a deliberate set amount of time for prayer. Some people are truly gifted to be prayer warriors and can pray for hours. For them the practice of prayer is the highlight of their day. For me it has been a constant struggle that has left me feeling guilty for not doing it enough and feeling like a failure for not setting an example to my family and the churches I have led. For years I tried to discipline myself to do what I thought I was supposed to do. Wake up at 5:00am read the bible and pray like any good Christian does. The alarm would go off and before I knew it I had hit the snooze button 10 times and it would now be time to go to school or work. I learned quickly that although I consider myself a morning person waking up to have devotions and prayer is incredibly difficult and it felt like work to me rather than something I could take joy in doing. So, I thought I’d try doing it right before bed. But once I hit the bed I’d be so tired that I couldn’t focus on what I was reading or what I was praying about. (fall asleep praying, mind would wander and say amen in the morning)
And that’s another thing I struggled with in my prayers is not to pray A.D.D. prayers. “Heavenly Father I thank you for this day and for all your many blessings you have given me and my family. I thank you for the home and vehicle you’ve provided…speaking of that I need to get the oil changed in the car. I noticed an oil drip in the garage the other day should really think about getting the garage painted this summer. I wonder what colors that paint comes in now? Speaking of colors Taylor needs to pick one out for the hall way if she wants me to get that painted.” I’d like to do it before our trip in June. I wonder if she’s getting snacks for the trip. I better remind her to get those twizzlers I like. Could be a long one without them. Oh, sorry God. Amen.”
Another confession I have for you is that I have never liked prayer meetings. I know that sounds unchristian but I’ve never liked them. That doesn’t mean they’re bad or anything they’ve just always been something that’s made me uncomfortable and feel awkward. I remember when I was a little kid and sometimes at the end of the prayer meetings the pastor would have everyone join hands to pray and you would have people crossing aisles to hold the hands of a total stranger and that felt so incredibly uncomfortable for me. Then the pastor would pray these long drawn out eleqouent booming prayers that sounded so fancy that I couldn’t understand what he was even talking about. The guys hand I was holding would get all sweaty and hot, and the longer they prayed the more they squeezed which hurt. Or when you came to the altar to pray you’d be on your knees so long that your legs would start falling asleep and it made you focus more on the uncomfortable position you found yourself in rather than the prayer being prayed and all you wanted to hear was amen so you could stand up again. I think people really thought I was spiritual back then because I shouted amen the loudest after those long prayer times not because of what was prayed but because my legs and hands were allowed to have blood again.
When I was a pastor in South Dakota I remember the DS wanted to have an all day prayer meeting which, let me tell you, being someone who struggled with prayer and prayer meetings wasn’t too thrilled about. Unfortunately it was held at my church so I felt obligated to go. 85% of the district pastors obviously didn’t feel the need to come but about 8 of us came. I’ve never been one to prayer super long prayers personally. Sometimes on Sunday when it warrants it but never all day. Although the 8 straight hours of prayer I participated in was good and an honorable practice I found myself many times wishing it was over because it felt so forced to me, boring, and empty. I am someone who enjoys 2 hour long worship through music rather than 2 hour prayer meetings. That’s just me. You may feel the opposite. For you prayer is how you express yourself where music just makes you uncomfortable.
I would bet the majority of us don’t have consistent prayer lives for a variety of reasons. For some it’s boring. You have so many other things going on that taking the time to stop and talk to what feels like air is boring. For some you don’t know how to pray. You don’t know what to say, how to say it or what God wants to hear. Some feel inadequate or they feel that God doesn’t care. Why would God care about the little things going on in my life when there are wars and aids epidemics happening all around us? God’s got bigger things to deal with then whether or not I get a job or my son gets over his strep throat. We feel inadequate in that we don’t feel spiritual enough, we don’t know enough, we aren’t good enough to come before God and talk to him. That should be left to the pastors who stand up on stage and preach, not little ol me who if I ever had to stand up on stage would vomit or who stutters and stumbles over my words every time I try to pray because I just don’t know how to do it or what to say or how to say it.
In the last few years my prayer life has improved. Definitely not even close to where it needs to be and I’m still not a big fan of prayer meetings but I love to pray in small groups. I know my prayer life is better because I have redefined what prayer is for me. When I hit the climax of my frustration, discouragement and guilt I decided to go back to the drawing board and see what prayer is really about. I threw out everything I’ve ever learned about prayer and especially threw out the misconceptions I had about prayer that it had to be some eloquent godly speech given in public to impress God and the people and/or that it had to be a set time every single day, on my knees, in my room, hands clasped. What I have learned in the last few years has been very freeing for me and as I share what I’ve learned I hope it will becomes freeing for you because the practice of prayer and priority of prayer in our lives individually and corporately is so important. It shouldn’t be a chore but rather something that we actually enjoy doing and look forward to participating in.
So if you want to improve your prayer life, which you should, you have to start by throwing out everything you think you know and start at the very basic definition of what prayer is. Prayer is, are you ready for this, talking to God. That’s it. It is me having a conversation with the One who loves me and created me. That’s it. You don’t add anything to that. “I know prayer is talking to God but isn’t it talking to God at a certain time and place and talking to him in a certain way?” No. You are adding onto the definition and making it legalistic when you think that, believe that and attempt to get others to believe the same way. Prayer is so simple and yet so awesome because it is just me having a conversation with god, the creator of all things wherever I want, whenever I want, with whomever I want and for however long I want. It’s when we put rules and stipulations on the discipline of prayer that it will start to become burdensome and boring, feels forced, fake, empty and maybe the worse is that we stop believing that God is actually going to do anything about what we pray about. It becomes a waste of time.
I know it doesn’t sound like much but if you can throw everything you think you know about prayer and what it is and replace it with this definition that prayer at its core is about me having a conversation with God that will be a huge big step for you when it comes to breaking free of the misconceptions out there about prayer.
Once it clicked that prayer is just me having an honest conversation with God and that it wasn’t something that had a bunch of rules attached to it like pray at this time, in this place, with these people and speak this way then I could then say okay, “How Do I Pray?” How do I have that conversation with God? How do I learn to make this incredibly important discipline become as common to me as breathing? How do I make this something I enjoy doing rather than a burden that I feel obligated to do? You have to go into prayer understanding a couple of key points that I’m happy to back up with scripture. Let me give those to you this morning. When you pray…
1. Get honest with God. In fact don’t just get honest with God, get brutally honest with God. Honestly, it’s okay. God can take it. I think sometimes we are afraid to get honest with God about how we really feel because we attach human feelings to God. For some reason we believe that if I say this to Him I might hurt God’s feelings and I don’t want to hurt God’s feelings so I better just thank him for the day and food and let the rest go. Or its been drilled into our heads that Christians can’t have bad days and our prayers should always be filled with happy happy joy joy thoughts. You can’t fool God and you can’t impress God so you might as well be honest with God. God created us. He knows us. He knows everything about us. He knows what we are thinking. He sees our hearts and motives. You can’t fool him, get things past him or impress him with eloquent speeches. Those prayers may impress the people around you but they don’t impress God. Prayer becomes so much more powerful and effective when we will quit trying to be something we aren’t and start getting real. Matthew 6:5 Jesus says, “When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them. I tell you the truth, that is all the reward they will ever get. 6 But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.” In other words quit trying to impress people and just be you. We spend our whole lives trying to impress others by attempting to be something we aren’t. God sees through that. When we pray away from the crowd it allows us to focus more on God and being honest with him rather than worrying about what others are thinking about how we are praying and what we are praying about. God already knows all your sins, worries, struggles, fears, faults, problems and shortcomings so there’s really no reason to come to his throne attempting to impress or deceive or pretend things are better than they are. Be honest. I love reading the Psalms because David is brutally honest in his prayers to God. He holds nothing back when it comes to praising God, making request of God, seeking forgiveness from God or even making accusations at God. Psalms 74, “O God, why have you rejected us so long? Why is your anger so intense against the sheep of your own pasture? Remember that we are the people you chose long ago, the tribe you redeemed as your own special possession!” Psalm 4, Answer me when I call to you, O God who declares me innocent. Free me from my troubles. Have mercy on me and hear my prayers…. Psalm 6, “O LORD, don’t rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your rage. 2 Have compassion on me, LORD, for I am weak. Heal me, LORD, for my bones are in agony. 3 I am sick at heart. How long, O LORD, until you restore me? 4 Return, O LORD, and rescue me. Save me because of your unfailing love. 5 For the dead do not remember you. Who can praise you from the grave?[b] 6 I am worn out from sobbing. All night I flood my bed with weeping, drenching it with my tears. 7 My vision is blurred by grief; my eyes are worn out because of all my enemies. Psalm 63, O God you are my God. I earnestly search for you. My soul thirst for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water. Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you! It gets no more real, no more raw, no more brutally honest than David’s prayers in the Psalms. He flat out said what his heart felt and God called David a man after His own heart! That’s how we must pray, with honesty. Never be afraid to tell God how you really feel both in worship of him, request to him, and even frustrations about Him. God can take it. Quit praying what you think God wants to hear or praying in ways that you think will impress and start praying what’s really on your heart and mind. Only through our honesty and casting off our sins, struggles, problems and worries at his feet can we experience peace, a sense of freedom from the darkness of this world and joy in our daily life. Give him your whole heart and watch God move in your life.
2. Talk to God about everything. Everything about you matters to God. If it didn’t he wouldn’t have wasted time having his one and only son die on the cross for your sins. So because everything about you matters to God talk to God about everything. Phil. 4:6, Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. There’s really is no need for us to worry about anything because God cares about everything in our lives. No matter how big or little you think your problem is god wants to hear about it, he cares about it so don’t be afraid to be honest and talk to him about it. James 5:13-16, Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. 14 Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven. 16 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. The prayer of the righteous is both powerful and effective. Hardships, sickness and happiness defines where all of us are today. You are either happy, sick, or suffering some kind of hardship like loss job, no money, tough marriage, loneliness, addiction on and on. James says pray about it. Talk to God about all of it. He cares about all of it. So, whatever is concerning you at the moment go ahead and give it to God. Talk to him right away. Don’t wait for a designated time and place just do it now. “God give me the words to say to this person, God grant me patience, God help meet this families needs, God show me if this is the right step for my life, God show me if I should buy this, God help me show her your love, God forgive me for doing this. God thank you for providing this at just the right time.” Nothing happening in your life is unimportant to God. He wants you to have a conversation with him like you would with your best friend. We tell our best friends everything. Lots of times we can’t wait to get on the phone and tell them, we’re excited about it. Treat God the same way. Make him the one you go to about everything first because the difference between God and your friend is that your friend might be able to provide an ear, God can provide peace. God can provide a solution, love, forgiveness. Notice also James says confess your sins to each other and pray. That means as a people with purpose you must not only confess to God but when you are hurting, sinning, struggling, doubting confess that to the body. To other Christians so that we too can lift you up in prayer and so you can know that you are not alone, you aren’t fighting alone and that you, despite your shortcomings, are genuinely loved by others. Confession to each other is so scary because we are afraid of judgment but God commands us to confess to the church and get help, get prayer, get accountability because sometimes you just can’t pray any more. Sometimes you just don’t have any fight left in you or any faith left in you that’s when the church surrounds you and does for you what you no longer have the strength to do, pray. That’s why youth group, small groups are so important. Opportunities for the body to confess and pray.
3. Never stop. When prayer is working at its best in your life it will become an attitude and a way of life not just something you do. I Thess. 5:17 says “Never stop praying.” This verse bugged me for a while because as I’ve told you I’ve always struggled to have a consistent prayer life. So if I struggle to pray at all how in the world can I be expected to never stop praying?! What this verse means is that we are to have a continuous personal fellowship with God and consciousness of being in his presence all day every day. God isn’t just in this building on Sunday’s. He is with us every day, everywhere. You don’t need to text him or call him you just start talking to him. God is with us all the time. We shouldn’t only speak to him in certain moments of life but in all moments of life. I have found that the more I just talk to God like talking to a friend the more at peace and secure I feel in my own life. Talking to him all day through all situations reminds me that even when life is tough God is with me. God never promised us riches and he never promised we wouldn’t suffer on this earth and go through some incredibly difficult and tragic moments but he did promise he would never leave us, he did promise unconditional love, he did promise to provide for our needs, to forgive us, to grant us peace and so in all of life; happy, sad or otherwise we should have fellowship with God continually.
I don’t normally have regular times of long prayers. Maybe you do and that’s awesome; keep praying in a way that works for you. What has worked for me is to make God my constant travelling companion. I talk to him all throughout the day like you would to a friend or your spouse. My conversations with him are sometimes a sentence and sometimes 30 minutes. Sometimes I laugh when I talk to him and sometimes I come in here in the sanctuary and I yell and share my frustrations. When I drive I talk out loud to him like he’s in the passenger seat. When I’m at Walmart I talk out loud to him about what I’m thinking about buying and ask him what he thinks. When I sit down to write sermons I ask him what he thinks of how that sentence is worded or if I’m understanding that scripture correctly. God has become as real to me as you are and I talk to him no different than if it was you and me talking and that has allowed my prayer life to be better than it ever has been because I’ve learned to just have a conversation with God and quit trying to impress God or impress people through eloquent speeches. It all sounds crazy I know but it’s honest. I may be committed someday but hey, it is what it is. Realizing that honesty and being myself was the key that set me free to discover a new way to pray where the pressure to perform or be eloquent is off. When I’m done talking to God I truly feel like my burden has been cast on him and I feel peace and joy about whatever situation I’m facing. When you start talking to God and quit talking at God and quit feeling a pressure to perform for God or people your prayer life will change forever and peace will come over you in a way that I can’t describe. You just have to try it and see for yourself.
And that peace is why we pray in the first place. We don’t pray so we get what we want. We don’t pray because it changes God. We pray because it changes us. Prayer humbles us. Prayer makes us better at prayer. By that I mean that the more time you commune with God the more in tune you will be with God and the more you will see what really needs to be addressed in prayer. You will begin to pray for the things of god rather than the wants and greeds of man. Prayer softens our hearts. Prayer reminds us who is really in control of our lives.
My prayer is for us as a people, the body of Christ to become a praying church. That we would not hesitate to confess to one another and to lift each other up in prayer in our services, small groups, youth meetings and in the grocery store aisle. When someone ask us for prayer don’t say what we normally say, “Oh I’ll pray for you.” Most times we forget. Instead stop right there and lift them up to the Lord. That’s what I’ve had to do. I will forget to pray so I try to pray right there with the person asking for prayer.
Get honest, talk about everything, never stop. Confess to each other and pray for one another. (Worship Team) Maybe you need to be prayed for today. Everyone in here is either sick, in a hardship or happy. We all need to be lifted up to the lord in prayer. Maybe you need to pray and ask God to help you have a better prayer life. Maybe you need to know Jesus this morning as your savior or rededicate your life to him. Whatever it is don’t be afraid to come here to the altar and lift up your prayers to God. Come up here and get honest with God. Final Thought: Pray humbly, proceed boldly. We must confess and pray in humility but then proceed boldly. Check your heart, check with your church, check the scriptures and when you know what God says proceed boldly. Believe his promises, trust in his word, follow his leading and calling in your life. (Ask people to come pray over those who come forward). The prayers of the righteous are powerful and effective. Let’s break free of the misconception that prayer has to be some impressive speech and start getting real. If you need prayer come up now and let your church family pray over you.
