What “Love Your Enemy” Is. . . And Isn’t:
- Matthew 5:44.
a. It is not excusing their actions,
- Often those who are our enemies have done things to us that have hurt us. Many people misunderstand Jesus’ command to forgive as a call to excuse their actions.
- Forgiving someone (and then moving beyond that to actually loving someone) is not saying, “What you did is no big deal.” In fact, it’s the opposite. Forgiving someone requires that we acknowledge that there is something to be forgiven there. It requires us acknowledging the hurt they caused us.
b. It is not hoping their evil succeeds.
- Some people might misinterpret the command to “love your enemy” as a call to hope they get what they want. Even if that means bad things happen or I get hurt, I’m supposed to hope they get what they are striving for.
c. It is shifting from wanting their destruction to wanting their redemption.
- “I hope for good things for your life.”
- “I hope to see you find God, peace, and joy.”
- This obviously can include wanting their repentance. If they’ve done things that are wrong, it would be unloving of us to hope that they are able to continue in evil, since we know the ultimate destruction that evil brings.
- There is a strong desire within most of us to seek revenge. We want to see our enemy pay for what they’ve done. We want to see them brought down.
- Loving your enemy involves shifting from the desire for revenge over to hoping that God will work in their lives and bring about good things. Those “good things” may not be at all what that evil person right now is wanting for their lives (they may be heading down a self-destructive path), but it is our hope for them to find ultimate good.
- It’s instructive to note the last half of verse 44. After calling for us to love our enemies, Jesus further instructs us to “pray for those who persecute you.” This is obviously not a prayer for them to succeed in their persecution of God’s people, but rather that they come to know God’s love instead of fighting against God’s people. That’s a helpful picture of the kind of prayers we’re supposed to be praying: for God to move them from the negative over to His goodness.
- It is not “I hope you succeed in your evil,” but “I hope for good things in your life.”
What’s Your Motivation?
a. God acted this way toward us when we were in our sin.
- Matthew 5:45.
- The line between good and evil runs through each human heart.
- We’ve been on the wrong side of the line in our relationship with God.
- We’re all been “enemies of God.”
- Every single one of us were away from God. None of us had the righteousness required to be able to be right before God.
- And yet, even while we were in that situation, God still cared for us and brought blessings into our lives, both great and small, as v. 45 speaks of.
- It would be easier for us to have a case in arguing that we shouldn’t love our enemies if we hadn’t each experienced God loving us even when we were His enemies.
b. God is using us in His attempt to transform the world.
- Matthew 5:46-47.
- If you do what comes naturally, what reward is there in that?
- As we love those who frustrate us, we have the ability to transform the situation to a redeeming one.
- Verses 46-47 remind us that the world loves those who love them back. Showing that kind of love doesn’t make us stand out – it just makes us fit in with everyone else.
- God wants to use us to help reach the world with the good news of what He’s done. One of the most effective ways that we can do that is to simply stand out. Standing out requires love that goes beyond what’s normal and expected.
- One of the most dramatic ways that we can transform the world is by love in the face of hatred.
Why It Works: We don’t really have much defense for love in the face of hatred.
- Matthew 5:43.
- This goes so strongly against our natural human inclination that it is nearly breathtaking when you see it.
- The omission and the addition.
- In v. 43 Jesus quotes the words that many Jews of His day had been taught on dealing with enemies. The religious leaders’ words, though, contain a crucial omission and addition.
- The omission is that it fails to say, “as yourself.” As in “Love your neighbor as yourself.” In Deuteronomy 6:5 and Leviticus 19:18 it speaks of having that kind of great love – to love someone else the way you would want to be loved. This was a truth that the New Testament emphasizes (Matthew 19:19; Matthew 22:39; Luke 10:27; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14; James 2:8).
- It’s not that the religious leaders hadn’t read the Old Testament passage – but for whatever reason they chose to reduce the difficulty of the teaching by omission.
- The addition is the inclusion of the final phrase “and hate your enemy.” Nowhere in the Old Testament law are the Jews instructed to hate anyone, even their enemies. In fact, comparison of passages like Exodus 23:4-5 and Job 31:29-30 reveal love toward enemies even then.
- Yet the religious leaders taught it and it was accepted.
- I should note that we often do similar things today: emphasizing the parts of the Bible that we find most palatable and teaching things that have no Biblical backing.
- When we love someone who has done nothing but meanness toward us, we blow that person’s mind.
- We live in a jaded culture – we’re cynical and suspicious. One of the few things that genuinely reaches us is to see someone love sacrificially.
- The rest of the world is living by the credo of v. 43, which makes our love of enemies so radical.
- This power that love has in the face of hatred makes it a powerful tool. Especially in the context of how we American Christians have tried to “win” the “culture war” over the last three decades.
- Our approach has been to call names, to file lawsuits, to insult those who disagree, to refuse to give up any ground, to blame our enemies, and to slap the name of God on the whole thing.
- What has it gotten us? Little discernable change in direction for our country and serious damage to the word “Christian” in American culture. We’re far more known for what we’re against than what we’re for.
- “I will outhate you” is not a winning strategy for the Christian (or anyone else, for that matter). Transforming a culture won’t happen by acting just like the world, only more so.
- You can also make the simple argument that the way you’ve tried to handle it in the past (meeting hatred with hatred) hasn’t worked out too well.
- In these matters, we have the “rules of engagement” dictated to us by the world. If someone hits you, you hit back harder. If someone insults you, you slam them back harder. If someone hurts you, you hurt them more.
- As Christians we need to stop and realize that those reactions are not mandatory. There are other options on the table, including what Jesus teaches us.
- Our impact doesn’t come through slickly packaged books or well-planned programs or being on the cutting edge.
- It comes from living a radically different life.
- It comes from living out sacrificial love.
- Jesus never said it’d be easy, but we need to love the way Jesus loved.
- And if it doesn’t convince them, at least it’ll confuse them! ;-)
- This is not to say that it’s always effective.
- As Jesus’ life cruelly illustrates, there are some who will retreat deeper into their hatred in the face of your love.
- But, still, it is an unusually effective strategy in many situations.
What It Usually Looks Like:
- In practical terms, how do you love an enemy?
a. It’s not shouting, “I love you, Bob!”
- Some imagine a Disney moment: our enemy walks away in anger, but as they are almost out of the room, we shout, “I love you!” and they slowly turn around, their heart touched.
- That’s probably not gonna happen.
b. It’s not giving a sappy speech.
- Some imagine the person standing and giving a long sappy speech about the nature of love and why they’re going to choose love in the face of oppression. And everyone is moved to tears by the sappy speech and changes their bad motives.
- That’s probably not gonna happen.
c. It’s not a group hug.
- Some imagine words of love being spoken and then everyone gathering together for a group hug where tears are shed.
- That’s probably not gonna happen.
d. It is finding small ways to serve them.
- The phrase from our servant evangelism events: “Trying to show God’s love in a practical way.”
- Examples:
- Your neighbor is angry at you, so you mow their grass.
- Your church is participating in a pro-life rally and you know that there are going to be pro-abortion protestors there, so you bring them donuts.
- Your relationship with your younger sister has been strained for years, so when she tells your Mom that she has no one to pick up her kids next week while she’s out of town, you call her and volunteer.
- Your co-worker is mad at you over a dispute on a project you recently worked together on, so you bring him coffee the next morning.
- Even if I don’t initially find an opportunity to serve then, I can still pray for them.
e. It is being persistently kind in the face of rejection.
- Examples:
- Saying hello in the hallway to someone who doesn’t respond.
- Waving to a neighbor even though they don’t respond.
- Putting up two fingers from the steering wheel when you pass them on the road.
