When you need something, and you ask for it, what do you expect? Do you expect an answer or an appeasement? Do you expect a clear-cut, usable answer to your request, or are you satisfied if you are just told, well, have a nice day? When you need something, and you ask for it, which really satisfies you: an answer, or an appeasement?
Answers give you what you really need. Appeasements just make you feel good at the moment, without solving anything.
The other day I called our bank. Margaret and I are planning a trip to Europe, and I wanted to arrange for our finances. Somewhere I had read that it is no longer necessary to carry a lot of cash or to convert dollars into foreign currency, because you can get money from Automatic Teller Machines over there. But I wanted to be sure, so I called the bank. I asked the service representative, "Can I use my ATM card in Germany?" And she said, "You can use your card at any of our banks anywhere." Hmm. Any of our banks anywhere. Does that mean you have bank branches in Germany, and, if you do, are there a good many of them? Will I be able to find one when I need it? "I don’t have that information, sir." Well, all right, I figured I had other ways to find that out, so then I asked, "Can the card be used in the branches of other banks that might be in one of the networks; bottom line, can I get Deutschmarks on my card?" The response was, "They haven’t sent us that information yet, sir. But I’m sure you’ll be all right; I hope you have a great trip!" Now, let me ask you: did I get an answer or an appeasement? Am I now a happy camper who can confidently run off to Germany with $10 in his pocket and a piece of plastic in his fist? I don’t think so. I don’t think so. I think I got an appeasement, not a real answer.
When you need something, and you ask for it, what do you expect? Do you expect an answer or an appeasement? Do you expect a clear-cut, usable answer to your request, or are you satisfied if you are just told, well, have a great trip?
This week the shoe was on the other foot. One of you called me and asked for information on how to deal with an Alzheimer’s patient. Was there anything I could share about nursing homes, assisted living, support groups, and the like? Did I have any way to help? Well, now, what did this person want? Hard answers or sympathy? Real, solid information, or oozy, unctuous soft nothings? Well, since I didn’t have very much information, I was very tempted to go into my spiritual act. “Oh, you poor thing, how tough it must be for you! Oh, you poor thing, let me just sit here and listen to you." There is always the lure of trying to make someone feel as though you’ve helped, when in fact all you did was to apply a Band-Aid. But people deserve to be helped, really helped, not just made to feel good at the moment. People want answers, not appeasement.
By the way, I did come up with some information by the end of the week!
The people of Israel had been well served by Joshua as he led them up from the wilderness wanderings and the foot of Mt. Nebo, where Moses had died. Town after town had been taken, king after king defeated.
Essentially the conquest of the land was over; victory was assured. Now the agenda was changing. Now the job was to parcel out the spoils, to allot to each tribe and each family the land that would belong to them. The plan was that each of the twelve tribes, and in some cases, half-tribes and other great families, would get a fair share of the land, would live in it, and would develop it.
So the work went forward. Land for the tribe of Reuben, land for the tribe of Gad, land for the tribe of Judah; and so forth. And then, finally, land for Ephraim and Manasseh, the two half-tribes that made up the tribe of Joseph.
That’s when things broke down. That’s when Joshua’s leadership was challenged. And that, also, is when Joshua showed his true value as a leader, for Joshua gave them answers, real answers, not just appeasement, not just what they wanted to hear. I’d like us today to learn a leadership lesson from Joshua’s wisdom. How can we give people what they need, and not just what they want? How can we give them answers, not appeasement?
I
The first thing we can do for those who ask us for something is to build on their self-esteem. We can help people find within themselves personal and spiritual resources to solve their own problems. It is a real answer when you help people to discover their own value; but, if you just give them what they want right now, that’s only an appeasement. That’s only a Band-Aid. And you may be telling them that they are worthless. You may be reinforcing their low self-esteem if you just hand out goodies without pushing people to discover their worth.
Part of Joshua’s skill in leadership was that he was a good listener. Notice how Joshua picked up on the fact that in the tribe of Joseph, whatever their complaint, there was some self-esteem. Notice how Joshua heard the proper pride of the tribe of Joseph, and he went to the bank on this:
They had complained, "Why have you given [us] but one lot and one portion ... since we are a numerous people, whom all along the Lord has blessed?" Some translations put it, "since we are a great people, whom the Lord has blessed."
Joshua picks up on that language. Joshua turns that part of their complaint into a challenge, "If you are a numerous people …, if you are a great people, then go and clear the forest for yourselves." Joshua begins to tap their very roots; he is going to build on their sense of greatness. For Joshua has learned that the first thing you must do if you are really going to help somebody, is to put the burden of responsibility right back where it belongs. And where is that? On the person with the need. You can help someone get what he needs, not necessarily what he thinks he wants, right now, if you will begin affirming the strengths that God has placed in this person. "If you are a great people, go ... "
Our task as Christians is to find in every person whatever God has put there that can be redeemed and made useful. Now there is no question that a lot of people in our society are profoundly damaged. All too many have been told, in one way or another, that they are no good. Some folks were physically or sexually abused as children, and that keeps on sending the "no good" signal to their minds. But that does not mean that they really are no good; that means we have to help them find what is good. Others made some mistake at an immature moment in their lives, and that keeps coming back to haunt them. They experimented with drugs, they did something illegal, they got involved in a damaging relationship. But that isn’t the whole story, it isn’t the whole truth. A lot of us have done a whole lot of stupid things, but that doesn’t tell the whole story. That’s not all there is to say about us.
And yet, lots of people have made so many mistakes, and erred so many times in their judgment, and, let me just use the Biblical word, lots of people have sinned so many times, they act like permanent victims. They have become browbeaten, devastated, damaged goods, permanent victims.
Some folks just always seem to be on the losing side of the ledger. And so they come to us and they ask; they ask for charity, they ask for sympathy. They ask to be rescued, they ask us to take over their lives and fix it. Just fix it!
But now you can dole out charity and sympathy all you want, but you will not change anything that way. You can appease a person like that all you wish, but it will not make a difference at the core. If you want to give an answer to that person who seems always to be in your face, needing something, you have to begin by finding the spiritual resources there are down within him. You have to know that there is something, down in there, that’s made by God and worth redeeming.
The instant the tribe of Joseph hinted that they were a great people, blessed by God, Joshua had his clue. "If you are a great people, then go up to the forest and clear land for yourselves." If you are a great people, since you are a great people, you have power, more power than you think.
A little girl named Raissa was born with a heart defect and with cerebral palsy. It was obvious, to anyone who could see, that she would never be able to do what other children did, and might not even live. One day, at her school, the teacher asked the children to use their "Show and Tell" time to say what they wanted to be when they grew up. Raissa, struggling to breathe, and barely able to get to her feet, blurted out, "I want to be a ballerina and a mommy." Douglas, a little boy in the class, immediately responded, "You can’t do that. People who are crippled can’t dance." That hurt Raissa. Raissa took that hurt home that night and shared it with her father. Daddy wanted to make it all right, of course; daddy wanted to be able to make that pain go away. But he couldn’t promise Raissa that she would be a ballerina; that just wouldn’t be honest. What could he do? Then it struck him; it struck him that every time she walked across the room without falling down, it was like a beautiful dance, to him. Every time she got up and tried again, though her legs so often failed her, it was evidence that there was a ballerina in her heart, if not in her legs. His little daughter already had the first ingredient of victory deep down inside her. His job was just to point to it and help her to hope. Building on the spiritual resources that were already there.
Personally, I just believe that there is no person who is beyond redemption. I believe that there is no individual so far gone that he cannot be changed and challenged. I believe that the love of God, rich and deep as it is, will reach unto the farthest star and plummet to the lowest hell. I believe that we can find in every person something that can be made beautiful for God. I believe that there is the stuff of some kind of greatness in every person. My task as a Christian, then, is to help that person find his greatness and build on it. I don’t want just to appease them; I want to give them answers.
II
There is something else we can do for those who come to us asking for help. There is another way in which we can give real answers to those who want something, and not just settle for appeasing. And that is that we can teach them to see obstacles as resources. We can show them that beneath what looks like a problem, there is the potential for success, if they will risk some discipline and spend some energy.
What did the tribe of Joseph say to Joshua? "Joshua, we don’t have enough. You gave us the hill country, but it’s too narrow. It won’t support us. It’s not enough. You’ve got to do better than this. You, Joshua, you have to give us more."
But Joshua did not accept the "you" language. He did not take this task on his own shoulders. He did not appease, but he gave an answer. And basically the answer was, you’ve got resources you haven’t even seen yet. He commanded, "Go up to the forest and clear ground there for yourselves." You say the hill country is too narrow? You say there isn’t enough open space? Guess what? Underneath the forest there is land. All you have to do is see it and uncover it.
You see, appeasement would have been to say, "You are right. Leave it to me, and I’ll take care of it. I’ll fix it, I’ll make it all right." Big Daddy will take good care of you. We Christians are always tempted to take problems on our own shoulders and make the hurt go away.
But we can’t always be Big Daddy. We can’t always give everybody what they want. And not only can we not always do it, we should not always do it. We must help people see that what looks like a problem is actually an asset. What looks like it stands in the way is actually only covering up what God has given.
A number of years ago I was asked to come to preach in one of the churches here in the District, a church which had been nearly destroyed as pastors would come and go every three or four years. I was talking with one of the church’s deacons about this problem, and he said, "The trouble is, we can’t grow. And we can’t grow because nobody lives here any more." I must have looked very puzzled at that remark, and I was, because there were plenty of houses and apartment buildings, all around, lots of people. But he went on to explain, "Our church can’t grow because nobody lives around here any more who is white, middle class, Baptist in background, and politically conservative." Well, I guess if you had to be all of those things, he was right. Nobody lived there anymore, at least nobody like that.
Thank the Lord, however, a missionary from the D. C. Baptist Convention got involved in that church, and she began to show them all the international people who were living in that community. She made them see that there were Hispanics and Filipinos, Japanese and Chinese, Africans of all nationalities. There were Egyptians and Iranians, Vietnamese and Brazilians there, by the thousands. And once this church actually saw these new people as people in need of Christ and not just as obstacles in their way, they began to grow again. Once a wise person, a Joshua, taught them that buried beneath every barrier there is an opportunity, beneath every negative there is a positive waiting to be discovered, beneath every "no" there is God’s great "yes" … once she gave them a real answer, they didn’t need to be appeased by their pastors any more. They didn’t need to whine anymore; they forgot what they didn’t have and they used what they did have.
You give people real answers, you give them real help, when you show them that what they think are obstacles are actually opportunities just waiting to be discovered.
Does anyone know the name of Russell Conwell? Russell Conwell was a Baptist preacher and a famous speaker on the lecture circuit many years ago. Russell Conwell had a lecture that he gave more than 6000 times; it was called "Acres of Diamonds." "Acres of Diamonds" was simply a retelling of a story Conwell had learned from a tour guide in Iran. It was the story of a man who had traveled the world in search of the finest and most alluring diamonds, only to be frustrated at every point. This man had invested years of his life and untold sums of money in running all over the place, from India to South Africa, trying to find and gather up glittering diamonds. But to no success. Everywhere he turned he was frustrated. And so he came home in defeat and went out to sit on the beach near his home, there to sulk and complain about his failures. But, so the story goes, as he sat and looked out at the waters lapping at his own shoreline, he saw something glimmering out there. He got up, went out to investigate; he reached his hand down into the sand, and came up with, you guessed it, a few small diamonds. He looked down, looked around, and there were more. In fact, the more he looked, the more he saw, everywhere, all up and down the beach, scores of diamonds, hundreds of diamonds, acres of diamonds. Right in his own back yard. Placed there for him to discover.
And Russell Conwell, preaching this lecture, used to talk about how he had had the dream of a great university, how he had wanted to see young people taught who could not afford to go to college. But he didn’t see how he could do this; he had no resources, no students, no faculty, no buildings. However, one day a young man from his church came to him and said that he wanted to be trained for the ministry; would Pastor Conwell just sit and teach him one night a week? They agreed to this arrangement, but the first night seven young people showed up, not just one. And the second night, more showed up, and then more and more, so that they finally had to rent a building, then by one, then hire another teacher, and so on, and so on until it became, as it is today, Temple University. Built on the diamonds in the rough in Russell Conwell’s own congregation. Placed right there for him to discover.
If you want to help someone, do not just take the problem on yourself and try to scramble up a Band-Aid. Help them to see that what looks like an obstacle is really an opportunity, just covered over for the moment. "Go up to the forest and clear ground there for yourselves." That’s an answer, not just an appeasement.
III
But there is one more thing we can do for people who ask our help. There is one more response, one more answer we can give to those who need something from us. And this is the most critical element of all. This is the most important thing of all.
We can help them see that victory is on the way, and that the enemy will not win. Victory is on the way, and the enemy will not win. Because, you see, victory comes to those who expect it. Victory comes to those who, in faith, can see what God is going to do, long before He does it; who can believe in the promises of God, however far off they may seem. Victory comes to those who know that He has overcome the world already.
Oh, listen to the last part of the complaint offered up by the tribe of Joseph, and listen to Joshua’s response. They have complained that they didn’t get enough land for a great people, and Joshua has reminded them that a great people, a truly great people, get going on their own. They have complained that the hill country was too narrow for them, and Joshua has pointed out to them that the forests are covering plenty of land, if they will just go clear it for themselves. But now they have one more complaint, now they whine once again:
"Yet all the Canaanites who live in the plain have chariots of iron, both those in Bethshean and its villages and those in the Valley of Jezreel". Joshua, the enemy is well equipped, and we don’t have much. The enemy has power and muscle, and we have very little to throw against that. All we have are swords and spears, and what is that against chariots of iron?
Joshua’s answer is masterful. It doesn’t at first glance seem like an answer. It seems like nothing more than empty words, flung against the sky. It seems like foolishness, but I assure you it is not. It is not. Listen carefully: "You are indeed a numerous people, and have great power ... for you shall drive out the Canaanites, though they have chariots of iron, and though they are strong." You shall, you shall.
Joshua’s message to the tribe of Joseph is to trust the God of victory, who has promised the land. Joshua’s message to the whiners and complainers is to believe that God will make good on his promises, and, though the enemy seem strong, victory will come at last. Believe it, live it, claim it, and victory will come.
Men and women, you and I have a whole lot more reason to believe that than they did in Joshua’s day. You and I have ample reason to know that victory will come and that God’s promises will be fulfilled, for you and I have seen Jesus Christ. You and I have seen the enemy and what he can do, but we have seen Jesus Christ, risen from the dead and victorious. You and I have been to a hill far away, outside a city wall, where the chariots of iron and the weapons of war were ranged against one who spoke not even a word in his own defense. And we have watched as they took his life away from him, defeated him, it would seem. But on the third day, on the third day, he rose again, and he is alive. He is victorious. He is victorious.
That’s what is waiting for us too. That’s the promise we can claim too. That’s the answer I have for you this morning when you ask, "Where is my life going and how am I going to make it over?" The answer is, "You shall drive out the Canaanites, though they have chariots of iron, and though they are strong." You shall, because God has promised you the victory and has given you the down payment in the risen Christ. You shall. You shall. You shall. That’s an answer, not just an appeasement!
This week I was privileged to sit with someone and listen to her story. She told an awesome tale of abuse and of danger. She spoke of years of struggling to support herself and her family; she described a reign of terror through which she has been living. She reminded me, on the one hand, of how fear can paralyze us, how anxiety can keep us from doing what we want to do; but she reminded me, on the other hand, how faith gets a victory. She asked me, if you want to help me, pray for one bedroom. Pray for one bedroom, because our little house, with only two bedrooms, is not large enough anymore. I’ve put one teenage child in one bedroom, the other teenage child in the other bedroom, and I am sleeping on the floor or the couch. I ask you to pray for one bedroom. Well, we did. We asked the Lord, who is preparing for us mansions in the beyond, to provide a room, just a room, in this life. And when we finished our prayer, do you know what she said? She looked up, she smiled, and she fairly shouted, "It’s coming. It’s coming. My room is on its way. I have my answer."
She has her answer. And it is a real answer, not just an appeasement. No, I don’t know the address of that room, but it’s out there. No, I don’t know who has possession of that room, but it doesn’t matter, because it’s only a temporary possession. God has promised it to his own. God has promised victory. "You shall drive out the Canaanites, though they have chariots of iron, and though they are strong." Victory is our answer, not just appeasement.
