Wedding Homily
I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.
You were all called to travel on the same road and in the same direction, so stay together, both outwardly and inwardly. You have one Master, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who rules over all, works through all, and is present in all. Everything you are and think and do is permeated with ONENESS.
Ephesians 3: 16-19; 4:4-6 (The Message)
ONENESS. I love the word. Its fun to say and the images it invokes are positive and pleasant.
Eagle and Gloria’s world is about to change. In every possible way they can imagine. And it centers around the word . . . ONENESS. They probably realize it (at least cognitively) but soon the Biblical concept of ONENESS will begin to take on a striking practicality.
ONENESS is most fully disclosed through mutual relationship with God in Jesus Christ. In fact, the more Eagle and Gloria become ONE, the more they will understand the DIVINE ONE. I jotted down a few ways they will see this ONENESS to manifest itself. In doing so, they will have an experiential understanding of God like never before.
1. There is the mystery of “two becoming one.”
a. Eagle and Gloria are each fully autonomous and healthy as individuals and yet their mission, their values, and their dreams will assimilate into … ONE.
b. Both Eagle and Gloria have distinct personalities.
c. Each will discover how to compliment the other.
d. But this “mystery of becoming one also illustrates our relationship with God. As the church become s the Bride of Christ.
e. The Bible says: Ephesians 5:29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
2. There is the wisdom in extending grace instead of justice . . . mercy instead of wrath
a. There will be ample opportunity to reflect God’s mercy and see God’s grace at work within each other since each have faults and each will, inevitably, fail the other is some way.
b. But love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8)
c. Love desires to pardon, reconcile, and restore.
3. There is a love so deep that one cannot help but serve the object of their affection.
a. Marriage is not a competition for attention. It is an opportunity to serve and empower.
b. The Bible says: Ephesians 5:21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself
c. To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the loving cup,
If you’re ever wrong admit it,
If you’re ever right, shut up! (Ogden Nash)
4. There is an intimacy extends into everything you do.
a. The day-to-day companionship
b. The times with God and serving God together
c. The euphoria of the sexual union
d. The small gestures of service
e. The authentic friendship
f. These are the things that produce intimacy!
5. There is the “keeping power” of a covenant.
a. Vows are not a ceremony – they are a covenant! They have meaning!
b. To violate them is a breach of contract.
c. ONENESS is the preserving element in the covenant.
In a few moments the fairy tale will begin. The princess will kiss the frog and we will all see him for the prince he is!
With that kiss the journey into ONENESS will begin too.
• They’ll understand God like never before.
• They’ll understand what it means to be human and in community like never before.
• They’ll understand Biblical concepts for life like never before.
• They’ll understand Christ and His Church like never before!
Why? Because …
You were all called to travel on the same road and in the same direction, so stay together, both outwardly and inwardly. You have one Master, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who rules over all, works through all, and is present in all. Everything you are and think and do is permeated with ONENESS.
Ephesians 3: 16-19; 4:4-6 (The Message)
Wrap-Up
In the book “101 Romantic Ideas” Laura Jeanne Allen tells the following story. I will read it to you because I do not want to miss any of it.
My Grandfather and Grandmother were married for over half a century, and played their own special game from the time they had met each other. The goal of their game was to write the word "SHMILY" in a surprise place for the other to find. They took turns leaving "SHMILY" around the house, and as soon as one of them discovered it, it was their turn to hide it once more.
They dragged "SHMILY" with their fingers through the sugar and flour containers to await whoever was preparing the next meal. They smeared it in the dew on the windows overlooking the patio where they always had warm, homemade pudding.
"SHMILY" was written in the steam left on the mirror after a hot shower, where it would reappear bath after bath. At one point, my Grandmother even unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper to leave "SHMILY" on the very last sheet.
There was no end to the places "SHMILY" would pop up. Little notes with "SHMILY" scribbled hurriedly were found on dashboards and car seats, or taped to steering wheels. The notes were stuffed inside shoes and left under pillows.
"SHMILY" was written in the dust upon the mantel and traced in the ashes of the fireplace. This mysterious word was as much a part of their house as the furniture.
It took me a long time before I was able to fully appreciate my grandparents’ game. Skepticism had kept some of them from believing in true love-one that is pure and enduring. However, I never doubted my grandparents’ relationship. They had love down pat. It was more than their flirtatious little games; it was a way of life. Their relationship was based on a devotion and passionate affection which not everyone is lucky to experience.
Grandma and Grandpa held hands every chance they could. They stole kisses as they bumped into each other in their tiny kitchen. They finished each other’s sentences and shared the daily crossword puzzle and word jumble.
My Grandmother whispered to one of her friends about how cute my Grandfather was, how handsome and old he had grown to be. She claimed that she really knew "how to pick ’em." Before every meal they bowed their heads and gave thanks, marveling at their blessings: a wonderful family, good fortune, and each other.
But there was a dark cloud in the couples’ life: my Grandmother had breast cancer. The disease had first appeared ten years earlier. As always, my Grandfather was with her every step of the way. He comforted her in their yellow room, painted that way so that she could always be surrounded by sunshine, even when she was too sick to go outside.
Now the cancer was again attacking her body. With the help of a cane and my Grandfather’s steady hand, they went to church every morning. But my Grandmother grew steadily weaker until, finally, she could not leave the house anymore. For a while, my Grandfather would go to church alone, praying to God to watch over my Grandmother.
Then one day, what everyone dreaded finally happened. My Grandmother was gone.
"SHMILY." It was scrawled in yellow on the pink ribbons of my Grandmother’s funeral bouquet. As the crowd thinned and the last mourners turned to leave, my aunts, uncles, cousins and other family members came forward and gathered around Grandma one last time.
My Grandfather stepped up to my Grandmother’s casket and, taking a shaky breath, he began to sing to her.
Through his tears and grief, the song came, a deep and throaty lullaby.
Shaking with my own sorrow, I will never forget that moment. I knew that, although I couldn’t begin to fathom the depth of their love, I had been privileged to witness its unmatched beauty.
S-H-M-I-L-Y
See How Much I Love You
Ephesians 5:32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
Proceed with the wedding.
