Back To School
Rooted on God’s Love
Ephesians 3:16-19
October 11, 2009
Two weeks ago we explored just three ways that we function in unhealthy emotional health. There are many more that those of us who are involved in the small group study will uncover. I just wanted to give you a taste of the three that I have observed to be the most prevalent.
This week I want to turn to the gift of the anchor. This anchor is what keeps us centered. It is the foundation upon which we build a healthy emotional spirituality.
People can be taught and do many of the things that help us grow spiritually: learning to pray, go to worship each week, give financially, attend a small group, discover and use your spiritual gift in ministry, and tell others about Jesus. These are all excellent things. But because we never get below the surface, all the dysfunction and entrenched behavior patterns of our past usually never change or dealt with unless we are forced to. We are left with a ten new things to feel guilt about.
On the other hand, I have know some very emotional secure and mature individuals that never have stepped foot in a church. I know several non-Christians who are more loving, more civil, and more balanced than many church members (even more than me!)
Yet there is one advantage that the follower of Jesus has over those outside such a relationship. We have root or foundation in God’s love. When we are secure in God’s love, we can face our fears, deal with the wreckage of the past with annihilating oneself, and to affirm our intrinsic self-worth. This indwelling power helps deal with the most difficult situations that may weigh us down. Check out Ephesians 3:16-19.
As you find your place, did you know that Noah did not do any fishing while on the ark. You would think that fishing would be a staple while you wait for the water to recede. But I guess he didn’t fish. How do we know this? Because he only had two worms!
"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
Despite years of studying the bible, small groups, and attending church here are some of the messages that people tell themselves internally. We could describe this as the internal answering machine. These are the tapes that play over and over that nobody hears but that we have internalized over the years. They are deeply held negative beliefs that we have picked up from our families and our culture. “I am a mistake. I am a burden. I am stupid. I am worthless. I am a bad ‘whatever’-mother, father, husband, wife, son, daughter, sister, brother. I am not allowed to make mistakes. I must be approved of by certain people to feel okay. I don’t really have the right to experience joy and pleasure (it is amazing how so many people who feel this way gravitate toward Christianity especially rigid Christianity). I should not assert myself and say what I think and feel. I don’t have a right to feel. My value comes from—my intelligence, wealth, job, role, what I do—not for who I am.”
And this is actually the first benefit of being rooted in God’s love
Rooted in God’s Love
• Affirmation of our worth
Because God loves as we are, I am worthy of feeling emotions. I’m worthy of being alive. I am lovable because God first loved me. Jesus died a horrendous death because God loves me. Nothing I do can change that. To live in any other reality (such as the tape that we play that says that we are really worthless) is to undermine what Jesus did on the cross. Those negative tapes are lies that need to be replaced by the Truth: Jesus. We may have to confront these negative self messages and discover where they came from and why we hold onto them so tightly.
Those outside spiritual circles have to find that sense of self-worth within. This is difficult when the negative tapes within contradict the idea that we are worthy of being alive. When we discover that unchanging love of God, nothing outside of us can alter the idea that we are of incredible value to God. Once we experience it, this reality becomes an anchor that holds in place no matter what storms try to blow us away.
Nothing is greater than God’s love. Nothing is deeper than God’s love. Nothing is more permanent than God’s love. The greatest of these is love. Just about all things will pass away but God’s love will not.
• Confers a new identity
When a degree is conferred, this means that a new title is placed upon the individual. They have been given a new identity or at least their identity is expanded. The hard work is officially recognized. Whether it is a college degree, a master’s degree, or a doctorate, a conferred degree is to place upon the person a new identity as well as a new responsibility. This person is now representing the institution. They may not be an official of the institution but they now represent all that the institution strives to embody.
When we experience the height, and depth, length of God’s love, we are also conferred a new identity. This gives us permission to express ourselves—the bad along with the good—and take care of ourselves in appropriate ways. Following Jesus confers a new identity of being “in Christ.” It says that I am a human being worthy of care, rest, respect, and love. When I sign off a letter or email, instead of sincerely I usually close with “In Christ.” This is a constant reminder of my identity and gives honor to God for who I am.
God doesn’t reject or punish for being honest and transparent. I am worthy of being. It is good that I exist. God wants me to be filled with joy and to enjoy life. The unchanging nature of God’s love allows me to assert my true self. We learn that as we do so, we do not die. We learn how to receive God’s love through human love and touch. Defensive walls that we have built begin to crumble and can be torn down.
• Brings healing
Brennan Manning said, “It is always true to some extent that we make our images of God. It is even truer that our image of God makes us. Eventually we become like the God we image.”
When we conceive and experience this wonderful image of a God that has such incredible love for us, we begin to heal our image of God. When we heal our image of God, we heal our image of ourselves. There is nothing more pleasurable and healing than to be delighted by a God that loves us with an inexhaustible love. Bernard of Clairvaux said that Jesus was as “honey to the mouth, music to the ear, and joy to the heart.”
With God’s love, we learn that our value to God does not derive from our performance and what we do for Him. We are not doing machines. God is not an angry deity that is dissatisfied by what we are not doing for Him. Truly being anchored in God’s love frees us to first be and then lovingly work with God not for God.
This anchor heals our emotional health. These are just a few of the things that emotional healthy spirituality is concerned with:
o Naming, recognizing, and managing our own feelings;
o Identifying with and having active compassion for others;
o Initiating and maintaining close and meaningful relationships;
o Breaking free from self-destructive patterns;
o Being aware of how our past impacts our present’;
o Developing the capacity to express our thoughts and feelings clearly, both verbally and nonverbally;
o Respecting and loving others without having to change them;
o Asking for what we need and want directly, clearly, and respectfully;
o Accurately self-assessing our strengths, limits, and weaknesses and freely sharing them with others;
o Learning the capacity to resolve conflict maturely and negotiate solutions that consider the perspectives of others;
o Distinguishing and appropriately expressing our sexuality and sensuality;
o Grieving well.
Cultivating an emotional healthy spirituality absolutely will change your life as well as the lives of those around you. However, it takes a lot of work. It takes intentional effort. AND it takes the willingness to be completely and totally honest even brutally honest.
Are we missing God’s abundant life? It is like going to an amusement park to watch everyone else ride the rides. For some, they are perfectly content watching other people ride. They don’t need anything more. But they will never enjoy the ride in the same way as those who ride.
If you don’t feel the need to ride this ride of emotional health and are content to watch others, then by all means keep on the path that you are on. Perhaps you will find some tools and information that you can pass along to help others. But if you want more out of walk with God, if you feel stuck, or if you know are missing something then this is probably a path that either you need or have been avoiding for too long. Join us on the ride of your life.
I have a prayer station set up for you to come and meditate and pray. Part of the tools for becoming emotionally healthy in our spirituality is contemplation/reflection/mediation. As you meditate on the rootedness of God’s love and seek God’s will, I invite you as an act of prayer and worship to take a seed and plant it into the soil. This act may symbolize your desire to rooted in God’s love or to be filled by His Spirit. It could mean that you want to continue or maybe just begin. It is an invitation for you prayerfully come and actively worship embracing the unchanging love of God.
