2. Barriers to Godly Growth
September 13th, 2009
Shame
A new pastor was visiting the homes of some of the people in his congregation. He came to one house and he knocked but there was no answer. He could see the lights were on and it seemed very obvious that someone was home so he knocked again. When there was no response he took out a note card and simply wrote on it Revelation 3:20 and stuck it in the door. The next Sunday after the offering was passed he found someone had put his note card in the plate. He looked at it to see that they had added to it a cryptic message saying simply: Genesis 3:10. The pastor grabbed his bible and opened it to the verse cited and began to laugh. Revelation 3:20 begins: “Behold I stand at the door and knock.” Genesis 3:10 reads: “I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.”
If we trace sin all the way back to its origin in the Garden of Eden we see that sin has a companion. There is something that goes along with sin that Adam and Eve both experienced having had their eyes opened to a knowledge of good and evil. Previously Adam and Eve had lived in the Garden and were without sin. They lived in community with God and He would come to walk with them in the garden. Genesis 2:25 tells us that when man was created he was naked and he knew no shame because man was innocent of evil. Then along comes the crafty serpent who tempts Adam and Eve to eat of the forbidden fruit. Lured by the promise of becoming like God Adam and Eve disobey God’s command and sin enters into the world. Their eyes were opened and they realized they were naked. Then they heard God coming. So Adam and Eve hid because they were ashamed. Where sin exists shame is sure to follow. That is the way it is designed. The Bible paints shame as a negative emotion that comes from guilt or an awareness of wrongdoing. When Adam and Eve heard God they knew their sin would be exposed and they were afraid because they were ashamed.
Shame is not a pleasant feeling. The problem with shame is that most Christians don’t know what to do with it because we have failed to understand the purpose of shame in our lives. Have you have ever noticed there are a lot of products on the market today that have printed on their label: use only as directed. When you use something in a manner other than that which it was intended you may find that ultimate result is the opposite of the desired effect.
We are looking at Barriers to Godly growth at the things that often get in the way of our relationship with God. Last week Jordan talked about sin and how sin separates us from God and keeps us from growing closer to Him. The trick with sin is that it is a package deal. Alone with sin comes shame. Shame is one of those things we have all experienced in our lives. We have all made mistakes and sometimes we make mistakes that we are so ashamed of that will live in terror of other people finding out. I have met so many people in my life that have tried to hide their past even from their loved ones because they believe if others found out, if people knew what they did, that no one would ever be able to love them. Their shame keeps them in isolation. Shame has a purpose but this is not it. What is the purpose of shame?
Shame has become a huge barrier in our spiritual development and our relationship with God. You see relationships are supposed to develop, their supposed to go someplace. Shame can be immobilizing. It is one of the common tools used by our enemy to keep us from fulfilling the commission that our Lord gave us. When we allow guilt or shame to reign in our lives as a result of mistakes or wrongs we have done we make ourselves ineffective. For when we hold on to our shame we become stagnant and too afraid to move. Shame keeps us from being a threat to the devil. Shame keeps us from being an asset to the kingdom of God. Shame essentially keeps us from doing anything really worth doing.
How many of us have felt this so often in our lives? You get connected to God, you feel Him moving with you and you get excited. You finally work up the courage to do something in service to the kingdom. Then something happens. Either a skeleton from your past comes up or in your excitement to serve in the kingdom of God you make a mistake. All of sudden you are overwhelmed with doubt and feelings of insecurity and unworthiness. So what do you do? You stop. In realizing you have made mistakes or being criticized for something you have done when life around us gets hard one thing we so often do is stop. Rather than pressing on and moving through it we go back to try and find our footing. We make a mistake and then we become terrified to make another and so we don’t do anything. We don’t risks. We just try to get back to something safe, something that we can control. When you use something in a manner other than that which it was intended you may find that ultimate result is the opposite of the desired effect. Shame has a purpose but this is not it, What is the purpose of shame?
Imagine you are watching the Olympics. All these different skaters come out with their impressive performances. Now in the Olympics the athlete will be judged on the on difficulty of their routine as well as the precision and grace with which the carry it out. In evaluating then you are looking for the overall quality of performance in seeing how many errors they make as well as how complicated what they are doing really is so then an athlete who attempted a more challenging jump may actually get more points for trying and failing or making a slight mistake than if they didn’t try at all. As a judge then what would do if one of the skaters came out and just slowly skated in a circle? They took no risks, and didn’t do anything challenging. Sure their performance might have been close to perfect but nothing was noteworthy. Anyone could have done what they did. Often times when we hold on to shame in our lives that is exactly what we do. Rather than trying anything or doing anything we just skate safely around. How would you judge that? Even just watching at home you’d sit there and think really? These others did such incredible routines and all you did was skate in circles, how did you even get in to the Olympics. You certainly wouldn’t say well done. That is the effect that shame has on our spiritual lives. It keeps us trapped in this fear of failure so that we are reluctant or unwilling to do anything.
Shame is the depression of our spiritual lives. We don’t want to go anywhere, don’t want to do anything, we just lay in the same place mopping around because we aren’t perfect. When we living thinking we are not good enough or that God’s grace is not strong enough and when we do this we cannot grow. For some of us even more than sin, shame is a barrier in our relationship with God. The feeling of having your sin uncovered and exposed is crippling and terrifying. So we walk around with this shame that we try to hide and even when we can admit it we find ourselves unable to let it go.
Shame eventually turns to bitterness, resentment, and if left unchecked can become an all out hatred toward God. When you allow shame to rule your life you kick God out of your heart and then wonder why He deserted you. Shame keeps us from seeing God’s heart. It keeps us from His love. We do not grow closer to God because either we do not feel we deserve to or because we do not know how. So we become spiritually stagnant. When you use something in a manner other than that which it was intended you may find that ultimate result is the opposite of the desired effect. Shame exists for a reason, but this is not it. What is the purpose of shame?
Now the real danger that shame poses in our lives is that it is a direct refusal to accept the grace of God. We cannot experience the fullness of His love and mercy because we consider ourselves to be unworthy of it. That is the point of grace. No one deserves it. Yet shame hides this reality from us, convincing us that our sin is worse than the sins of others and in so doing it prevents us from truly experiencing God’s love. Shame makes us view ourselves as lowly filthy creatures that are unlovable by God. Accepting that God offers grace to others is one thing but for us it’s another. After all how could God love us after what we have done? When shame takes hold of our hearts we cannot feel the love and grace He offers because we view our own mistakes as being greater than the love or mercy of God. With this we essentially reject the power of the cross and the significance of the sacrifice of Jesus because we somehow allow ourselves to believe that our sin is greater than His sacrifice. In so doing without even realizing it we are rejecting Jesus because truthfully shame is a result of a lack of faith in the grace of God.
The trouble with shame is that it keeps us connected to our sin. So long as we hold on to shame we will not break away from the habit of sin. Thus shame becomes the instrument that keeps us from escaping the cycle of sin in our lives. This is not why we experience shame. When you use something in a manner other than that which it was intended you may find that ultimate result is the opposite of the desired effect. What is the purpose of shame? Let me read for you from Romans 10:9
Ro 10:9 That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Ro 10:10 For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. Ro 10:11 As the Scripture says, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame.” Ro 10:12 For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, Ro 10:13 for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Ro 10:14 How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? Ro 10:15 And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”
Those who trust in God will never be put to shame. As Christians we should not live in the shadow of the shame of sin. We have sins but shame comes from a lack of faith in Jesus sacrifice to cover those sins. Shame comes when we refuse to let go of the guilt of sin in our lives. Jesus won’t take your sin from you by force. You have to be willing to give it to Him, to lay it at His feet. We must let go of our shame so that we can grow in our relationship with God. But shame is not all bad.
Shame is actually a very important consequence of sin. Sin creates shame which is then supposed to lead us to repentance so that we can change our ways and draw nearer to God. The twist the enemy puts on that is rather than the shame leading us to repentance it leads keeps us connected to our sin which leads to more shame which leads to more sin. When we allow ourselves to hold on to shame longer than is necessary to draw us near to God then that shame becomes not a tool from God but a trap from the devil. Shame has also been corrupted by our enemy to lead us away from God. So shame often becomes not the source of our drawing closer to God as it should be but in fact the very thing that tears us away from Him. We must learn to use shame as it was intended so that it draws us to God instead of forcing us away from Him.
Some of us in here today we have felt isolated from God for so long because we have held onto shame instead of faith in the blood of the Lamb of God. It is time to be freed from the prison of shame in our lives. It is time to let go of the burden you carry. Shame is a tool from God, but it is only effective when we are willing to let go of it. For God does not give us shame so we can live feeling worthless. He gives us shame so that we will draw near to Him and change our ways. Let us use shame in the manner in which we are directed, as a tool to connect us to God. So this morning during the time of invitation I would like to ask anyone who has been holding on to shame in their lives, anyone who has been refusing to let go of something. I ask if you have been living in shame to come forward, to write that down on a card, and we have a cross up here. I want you to come nail the source of your shame to this cross as you let it go and give yourself over to God. Let us overcome shame and experience the true love that God has for us.
