FATHERING UNTO MATURITY
Introduction:
1. Responsibility for children, is seen as belonging to the mother.
Fathers spend about a third as much time as mothers in providing direct child care.
A review of research in 186 societies found that fathers have "regular, close relationships" with their children during infancy in only 2 per cent of these societies.
In some parts of West Africa, contact between men and very young children is seen as taboo.
A Jamaican study found that a man’s involvement with his children fell significantly when his children lived elsewhere, particularly if they lived in the home of another man.
A study in Chile found that by age six, about 40 per cent of children born to unmarried adolescent couples are unacknowledged and abandoned by their fathers.
Economic support from fathers also declines when marriages fail.
In Argentina, only 36 per cent of divorced fathers make regular child support payments.
In the United States and Malaysia, 40 and 50 per cent of divorced fathers, respectively, pay no child support at all.
In Japan, 75 per cent of divorced fathers have never paid child support.
In Barbados, a study of eight-year-old children born to adolescent mothers found that those whose fathers were involved in their upbringing did much better in school than those whose fathers were not.
2. The importance of Fathers have been greatly underestimated in America.
The statistics are sobering:
40 percent of boys are being raised without their biological fathers, according to Newsweek magazine.
85 percent of people in prison grew up without a father.
70 percent of school dropouts and 70 percent of teen suicides came from fatherless homes.
Kids without fathers are more likely to live in poverty; to suffer emotional, health and social problems; to become teenage parents; and to smoke, drink and take drugs, according to "Experiments in Living: The Fatherless Family" by Rebecca O’Neill.
3. God is our real father.
Although my children belong to me biologically I am not their real father.
a. I am only fostering them through this life temporarily until they go home.
b. If you were babysitting someones children, you would take every effort to return them to their parents unscathed in any fashion.
c. I can only father them to maturity.
God can father us to maturity.
I. Our Father educates us.
Bok’s Law: If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
A. God has revealed the rule of his house.
1. We all have certain general rules in our homes.
a. NO FIGHTING. When the girls start to fight we often ask, “Is this helpful, or hurtful.
b. We learn the rules very quickly especially if they are enforced.
c. Illustration.
During the Victorian era, one how-to-do-it-right manual was Lady Gough’s Book of Etiquette. In this volume, putting books by male authors next to books by female authors was forbidden - unless the authors were married.
Source Unknown.
2. God revealed his rules as mankind matured.
a. In the age of the patriarchs, God instructed the Fathers to answer for their families.
b. In the Mosaical age, God handed down 613 rules.
c. In the Christian age, Perfect Law of Liberty.
Jam 2:12 So speak ye, and so do, as they that shall be judged by the law of liberty.
3. God knows what we need to learn.
A young boy once approached his father to ask, "Dad, why does the wind blow?", to which the father responded, "I don’t know, son." "Dad, where do the clouds come from?" "I’m not sure, son." "Dad, what makes a rainbow?" "No idea, son." "Dad, do you mind me asking you all these questions.?" "Not at all, son. How else are you going to learn?"
Source Unknown.
B. God teaches through the example of his son.
1. Jesus grew up in an average home.
2. Jesus was obedient to his Father. Luke 2:49
And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business?
3. The Father loved Jesus.
C. God give pop quizzes.
1. We will be tested in this life.
2. He will help us pass.
The setting is Ohio State University about six or seven years ago in a huge lecture hall (approximately 1000 students) for a Calculus final.
Apparently this particular calculus teacher wasn’t very well liked. He was one of those guys who would stand at the front of the class and yell out how much time was remaining before the end of a test, a real charmer. Since he was so busy gallivanting around the room making sure that nobody cheated and that everyone was aware of how much time they had left before their failure on the test was complete, he had the students stack the completed tests on the huge podium at the front of the room. This made for quite a
mess, remember there were 1000 students in the class.
During this particular final, one guy entered the test needing a decent grade to pass the class. His only problem with Calculus was that he did poorly when rushed, and this guy standing in the front of the room barking out how much time was left before the tests had to be handed in didn’t help him at all. He figured he wanted to assure himself of a good grade, so he hardly flinched when the professor said "pencils down and submit your scantron sheets and work to piles at the front of the room". Five minutes turned into ten, ten into twenty, twenty into forty...almost an hour after the test was "officially over", our friend finally put down his pencil, gathered up his work, and headed to the front of the hall to submit his final. The whole time, the professor sat at the front of the room, strangely waiting for the student to complete his exam.
"What do you think you’re doing?" the professor asked as the student stood in front of him about to put down his exam on one of the neatly stacked piles of exams (the professor had plenty of time to stack the mountain of papers while he waited) It was clear that the professor had waited only to give the student a hard time.
"Turning in my exam," retorted the student confidently. "I’m afraid I have some bad news for you," the professor gloated, "Your exam is an hour late. You’ve failed it and, consequently, I’ll see you next term when you repeat my course."
The student smiled slyly and asked the professor "Do you know who I am?"
"What?" replied the professor gruffly, annoyed that the student showed no sign of emotion.
The student rephrased the question mockingly, "Do you know what my name is?"
"No", snarled the professor.
The student looked the professor dead in the eyes and said slowly, "I didn’t think so", as he lifted up one of the stacks half way, shoved his test neatly into the center of the stack, let the stack fall burying his test in the middle, turned around, and walked casually out of the huge lecture hall.
Source Unknown.
3. We will be graded.
II. Our Father disciplines us.
A. God admonishes us.
1. The Gospel teaches us his truth.
a. Illustration.
Once the Devil was walking along with one of his cohorts. They saw a man ahead of them pick up something shiny. "What did he find?" asked the cohort.
"A piece of the truth," the Devil replied.
"Doesn’t it bother you that he found a piece of the truth?" asked the cohort.
"No," said the Devil, "I will see to it that he makes a religion out of it."
Klyne Snodgrass, Between Two Truths - Living with Biblical Tensions, 1990, Zondervan Publishing House, p. 35.
b. One day I was talking with a friend who happened to be a professor at Iowa State University about absolute truth.
2. The Gospel gives us examples.
3. The Gospel guides us.
B. God chastises us. Heb 12:5-6
And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.
1. He chastens those he loves.
2. Are we listening.
C. God warns us.
1. When we continue in sin, its because we arent listening to his warnings.
2. If we die in our sins, than its because we chose to.
III. Our Father leads us.
A. God holds us up.
1. He wont let us get spoiled.
A. Illustration.
Little girl and the chicken nuggets. The Father wouldn’t let her have more. Why are you doing this to me.
2. He wont crush our spirits.
B. God goes behind us.
C. God waits on us.
1. God is full of patience.
2. God is full of Grace.
Conclusion.
Though many of us have seen pictures of a huge eagle’s nest high in the branches of a tree or in the crag of a cliff, few of us have gotten a glimpse inside. When a mother eagle builds her nest she starts with thorns, broken branches, sharp rocks, and a number of other items that seem entirely unsuitable for the project. But then she lines the nest with a thick padding of wool, feathers, and fur from animals she has killed, making it soft and comfortable for the eggs. By the time the growing birds reach flying age, the comfort of the nest and the luxury of free meals make them quite reluctant to leave. That’s when the mother eagle begins "stirring up the nest." With her strong talons she begins pulling up the thick carpet of fur and feathers, bringing the sharp rocks and branches to the surface. As more of the bedding gets plucked up, the nest becomes more uncomfortable for the young eagles. Eventually, this and other urgings prompt the growing eagles to leave their once-comfortable abode and move on to more mature behavior.
Today in the Word, June 11, 1989.
