A father was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. Then return, by then you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds."
In two when the father returned, he shocked the doctor because he had lost 25 pounds.
"That’s amazing!" said the doctor, "Did you follow my instructions?"
“I did indeed.” the father replied, “But I’ll tell you I thought I was going to die on those 3rd days."
"From hunger?" the doctor asked.
"No,” replied the father, “from skipping."
Lessons from God on Being a Father
Today I want to share 10 Lessons we can learn from God on how to be a good father. I know not all of you are fathers but we can all learn form these lessons.
Lesson 1 Give your Name
George Foreman is famous for many things: boxing champion, pitchman, grill guru, television celebrity, and, he named all five of his sons, George. When asked why he gave all his sons the same name, he usually quips something like, “If you’d been hit in the head as many times as me, you’d make life as simple as possible.” But if pressed for an answer, He says, “I named my kids George because I want them all to remember who their daddy is.” This is coming from a man who had an absentee father.
When we were lost in our sins, we also had an absentee father. Our pride, our vain ambitions, an unending quest for significance and a lust for material happiness; all make for a type of father who we can never please.
As Christians we are called a part of the family of God.
Ro 8:13 For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live,
Ro 8:14 because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God.
Ro 8:15 For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba,Father.”
Ro 8:16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.
Ro 8:17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
We need to make sure our children know who their father is. When my daughters were teenagers and were going out for an evening with friends, I would remind them that because of their family name they were not going out alone. Every thing they did good or bad, reflected back on everyone in their family, just because they had a last name. Give your children a good name and teach them the responsibility of keeping it good.
Lesson 2, Give Time
In the beginning God created the sun & moon. He put 24 hours in every day, 7 days in every week etc. Then He took one of those days and decided to spend quality time with His family.
Ge 2:3 And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.
The forth of the Ten Commandments, commands us to observe this seventh day. We are not working on it. It is a day of rest. The Commandment, “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.” Is found in Ex. 20:8, then there are three more verses that clarify God’s point for this commandment: It’s a day to focus on God and a day of rest, for you and everyone in your house. Imagine, God set aside a whole day, every week to spend with His kids. Every week without fail, without exception and without excuse God wants to spend a day with His Children. There is no substitute for time and no excuse for not spending the time.
Lesson 3, Make your Home a Safe Haven
One of my favorite passages is Revelation 21:3 & 4. I think this is one of the best descriptions of God’s home.
Rev 21:3 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.
Rev 21:4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”
I like this passage, because it says, “Now.” If we read the preceding verses we see that the Devil and all the ’bad stuff’ are destroyed or banished. This means we will be safe and secure. The doors are locked, the dead bolt is in place. The security system is turned on. There is no danger. No abuse. No hatefulness. No sarcasm. No rolling eyes. No disappointment. Nothing but the good stuff and we will have access to it forever.
This is a description of God’s home and it should be a description of our home too.
Lesson 4, Build Up Your Children’s Character
God does not focus on our failures. Romans 3:23 says, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” that is not a criticism, it is an observed fact. I don’t know about you, but I was not surprised the first time I read that verse, I knew I was a sinner from way back. What surprised me about the gospel message was Romans 3:24, “and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” I always thought I had to do something to earn God’s favor. But that is not the case, God’s favor is not the first thing we receive from God, the first thing we receive is His Grace. You or I standing alone before God are in trouble; we are sinners who have failed. But when redemption through Christ is added, everything changes, mercy is applied, redemption happens and our vain failures are replaced with divine favor and completeness. I liked the way Neil Anderson describes this in the book, “Victory Over the Darkness”, “The only identity equation that works in God’s kingdom is you plus Christ equals wholeness and meaning.” One plus the other adds up to something great.
The Major League record for homeruns is held by the Aaron brothers. Henry and Tommie combined hit more homeruns than any other combination of brothers in baseball history. Together they hit 768 homeruns. Henry hit 755 of them and Tommie added 13. Even though one brother did the bulk of the work, together they accomplished something great. Tommie played 7 seasons to get those 13 homers and his biggest claim to fame was his brother. This did not make him less of a man, 7 years in the pros is still impressive.
Likewise, needing to be identified with Christ does not make us less, but more. Needing Christ does not take from our character, it completes our character. God does not point to our inadequacies when He points out our sin, rather He’s pointing to our potential with Christ in us.
As parents we need to be a never ending source supplying our children with the message of what they can do and who they can be as long as they keep their priorities in the proper order. There is no shame in needing help, no shame in needing to learn, no shame in needing grace. The only shame is in being stubborn and stupid.
Lesson 5 , God is Always Fair
In God’s family all have sinned, there are no family pets, no favorite child, no special treatment, everyone receives a mutual reward. Remember the Parable of the Prodigal Son, in Luke 15? Remember how the older brother hated it when the younger son was welcomed home? The older brother was angry because the father killed the fatted calf to celebrate the younger son’s return. The Eldest said, “...you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.” Then, the father said to the son, “you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.” The eldest son remained upset, but the father’s position on fairness never changed. The father doesn’t alter his standards to please the whining child. He holds firm to the larger picture and the greater good. Fairness does not mean everybody’s happy. You can win a game fair-and-square, but there’s still a loser, we should not expect everyone to be happy.
Parents are the ones who are supposed to be experienced in life and able to make the right decisions, even when some remain unhappy. Parents do not have the luxury of being a child or making childish decisions. We will not always be popular and we will still make mistakes. But we can be fair, if we base our decisions on God’s standards.
Lesson 6 , God teaches us that family is permanent.
Hebrews 13:5 says, "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Verse 6 adds, "So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" I will never leave you or forsake you no one can take you from my hands.”
Money and temporal pleasures will come and go. But God’s wants us to know our relationship with Him is secure. We need to pass that sense of security on to our family.
In Malachi 2:16 the Bible says that God "hates divorce." Divorce rips at the fiber of family and relationship. I know many of you have been divorced, but the term ’divorced family’ undermines what family was meant to be. Terms like ’abusive husband’ or ’unfaithful wife’ are also contrary to God’s plan for the family. As Christians, we are called to live to a high standard, some times a seemingly impossible standard, but the Bible is still the standard. God desires our families to be permanent.
Lesson 7, God Allows Freedom
In the Parable of the prodigal son, the youngest son wants some money and he wants to leave. The dad lets him go, even though we all know that the future holds disaster. The Father never tracks the prodigal son down. The father never brings him more money to keep him out of the pig farms and poverty, the father simply stays home, waiting and praying for his son to grow up and take responsibility for his actions. The son is free to return home; free to be fully restored, free to be part of the family again or not.
Giving your child freedom can be one of the hardest things you will ever face. When your child moves out and then phones home asking for help with the rent, knowing if you are helping them to get started or whether you are enabling them to continue poor spending habits is a tough call. But when you’re the dad, that’s your job and this is one of the times your child needs you to make the right decision, even if it makes them unhappy.
Lesson 8, God Led by Example
Phil 2:5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Phil 2:6 Who, being in very nature God,did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
Phil 2:7 but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.
Phil 2:8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross!
In Mark chapter 10 Jesus encounters a man who asks, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus gives a lengthy answer then ends by saying in verse 21, “Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
Jesus did not live one lifestyle and ask His followers to lead another.
You know the politicians we send to Washington DC, the ones who determine federal taxes, stimulus packages, nationalized heath care and such things, did you know their salary is $174,000 a year plus expenses. This is not the example God has set for us.
As fathers, mothers, friends and Christians we are called, not to lead from above, but to lead from beside.
The ninth Lesson is to Be a Finisher
Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane asking if the there was a way to finish without going to the cross. There wasn’t, so He did. He took the beating, the humiliation, the abuse, the nails, the spear, the ridicule and then cried out, “It is finished.”
We have no positive biblical example of quitting. Christians don’t quit, we deal with it. We follow God’s leading and we believe the path we’re on is the one He is directing or we acknowledge our mistake and repent. Which leads us to,
Lesson 10, No Sacrifice is Too Great
John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” God willingly gave the most precious thing He had.
In life most of us, grow up, go to work, fall in love and get married. When Colleen and I married, I worked in a gas station earning $2.00 an hour. My friends were running around doing fun things, quitting their jobs for this reason or that, but I loved my family and wanted to provide for them. So instead of running around, I took a second job. I remember one occasion when my boss insulted and ridiculed me and I wanted to smack him, instead I swallow my pride rather than swallowing my family. Most of us have done things like this because we love our families.
We stay the course, we do every thing we can to help our families succeed. We don’t complain or really even think of it as a sacrifice, we just do it because it’s right and we know it. We forget about expensive cars we once dreamed about, we put off lavish vacations and we are glad to do it because it helps our family.
We learned this from God who gave us love and the blessings we have in life. God is our father and He is the standard. It is not hard to live up to the standard, all we have to do is let God live through us. The hard part is keeping out of His way.
