9The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. 10And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you. 11Sing praises to the LORD, who dwells in Zion. Declare his deeds among the peoples. 12For he who avenges blood is mindful of them; he does not forget the cry of the afflicted. 13Be gracious to me, O LORD. See what I suffer from those who hate me; you are the one who lifts me up from the gates of death, 14so that I may recount all your praises, and, in the gates of daughter Zion, rejoice in your deliverance. 15The nations have sunk in the pit that they made; in the net that they hid has their own foot been caught. 16The LORD has made himself known, he has executed judgment; the wicked are snared in the work of their own hands. Higgaion. Selah 17The wicked shall depart to Sheol, all the nations that forget God. 18For the needy shall not always be forgotten, nor the hope of the poor perish forever. 19Rise up, O LORD! Do not let mortals prevail; let the nations be judged before you. 20Put them in fear, O LORD; let the nations know that they are only human. Selahlll Psalms 9:9 - 20 (NRSVA)
Today we come to the end of our series on the home. We come to the time of a sacred commitment, and re-commitment. In a few moments our guest minister will lead us through a time of reaffirmation of marriage vows – the key to the household’s stronghold: the Christian home designed by God.
But first, let’s review where we’ve been up to now:
I. Marital Rocks and Hard Places
We began in week one with the up-front view of today’s reality – building a strong marriage is not a piece of cake! There’s no lack of challenge in relationships. Nevertheless, God designed marriage and home to be permanent arrangements for as long as we live. But today more than half of all contemporary marriages end in divorce.
First Corinthians 7 tells us that swallowing our pride is the chief building block of a good marriage. It is the kind of swallow that is done at the altar of your heart, where you realize you’re not God; you climb down from the throne and give Jesus your life.
II. Family Ties
In week two we looked at the marriage plan in Genesis. God said it was not good for Adam to be alone, so he built, and then brought Eve to him. Adam was made in God’s image; just as God desires relationship with us, we also have the desire for close relationship. This is why marriage is ordained of God; it is His natural way for us.
But we humans are good at missing that point. Do you remember the fellow who went to the doctor because he hurt all over? He said, “Fix me, Doc; everywhere I touch I hurt. When I touch my head it hurts; when I touch my side or my toe it hurts. It all hurts; Doc, I’m falling apart.” The Doc said, “Relax – your head side and foot are OK – you have a broken finger!” Contemporary culture looks at marriage that way; we miss God’s way but it’s not marriage that’s broken; it’s us!
III. Family Birthmark
In week three Psalm 1 showed us very clearly that God’s family members all have a birthmark. It comes from working on the Christian home place. The birthmark is a compass really – it’s all about charting our course through life with godly choices.
We learned that we must pattern our lives after what we see in godly homes, and from godly people. By making Biblical choices we see Christ grow bigger in us.
Do you recall Lucy in the Chronicles of Narnia? In one of the books, Lucy returns to Narnia as an older child. She encounters Aslan the lion (Jesus) and remarks, “you’re so much bigger now.” Aslan tells her, “It’s because you’ve grown”.
The family birthmark is a sign that develops as Christ grows big in you. You almost don’t know it until you are faced with the same struggle with temptation you lost a year ago….and now it looks so much smaller. As Christ (the birthmark) grows in us, we grow stronger.
IV. Training Wheels
In week four we looked at the process, purpose and product of using the training wheels we find in Proverbs 22:6. The whole point is demonstration by the adults rather than lecture. Kids practice what they learn from us by observation rather than instruction.
You may recall the illustration of the Mom who was singing Gospel songs and hymns as she was cleaning. Her toddler was singing along in the next room. Mom began singing Andre’ Crouch’s “Soon and Very Soon We Are Going to See the King”. After repeating herself a few times she sensed the three year old was right with her…but it was a little different. So she stopped and listened; from the other room a budding opera star belted out, “Soon and very soon we are going to Burger King”. It’s a good thing to check up on what they’re learning at your knee!
V. Peace At Home
The last week (which you only got on email due to my absence) was John 14:27 about how to have real peace at home. When peace is missing, the solution (all too often and quickly) in our culture is early bail-out. However, Scripture teaches that marriage is to be permanent, so we work at knowing how to bring peace to the home.
We learned that some of the robber barons of peace in the home are hatred, envy and laziness. These steal peace regularly. We saw that the primary factor that is almost always the chief ingredient for losing peace at home is pride.
The antidote for the pride that steals peace is kneeling in surrender to Christ for forgiveness. As the apostle Peter says: we must clothe ourselves with humility. [1] This is how we knit the garment of peace, joining husband and wife as one, committing to the long term and working at it day by day.
The Household Stronghold
Today’s “wrap-up” is merely punctuation to what we’ve been looking at for six weeks. The Psalmist tells us today:
9The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
Oppression can come from outside – but for most home problems it is the lack of a husband and wife on their knees before holy God that brings the pressure that blows marriages and families apart. In marriage ceremonies I often give the example of the advice from Ecclesiastes:
A threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12b (NRSVA)
The weakest configuration in physics is “two” trying to hold together. The strongest is “three”. Consider the triangle for your marriage. With the husband standing at the base on one side, and the bride at the base on the other, they are apart…attempting to hold together. What will hold them together – her cooking? How about their good looks? How about the kids? How about lots of money?
Eventually all the things that are physical and external attractions will lose their strongest appeal and ability to hold the marriage together. These actually begin to work against it. But add the third dimension that completes a triangle with complete surrender to God, Who is seated at the top of that triangle, and you have a bond that will go unbroken! The truth is that the closer you get to Him together, the closer you’ll be to each other.
Every bit of Biblical wisdom we have seen in constructing, maintaining and growing the Christian home cannot be done apart from Christ. Neither can it be done from a position of prominence; it must all be done in humility. It must all be done from a position of kneeling. It’s not a physical position – although many couples kneel in their wedding ceremonies. It is a position of attitude, where we come to each other in God’s kind of loving approach – willing to do the best for the other, no matter the cost or personal pride that has to be swallowed.
That was the kind of love God showed to us in Christ when Jesus emptied himself of everything, every privilege he enjoyed in eternity past, while in heaven with the Father, and became one of us. He took the best in the universe – all the Godly attributes of divine nature which were His, and laid it all aside to take on all our sins and pride.
So as these who will renew their vows come to each other again, on their knees in their hearts, before God and all their friends and church family, we celebrate with them, and rejoice with them.
But we also see the picture of what God wants for every man, woman and child – to surrender life, pride and behavior to the King of Glory.
As you witness this joy, consider your own heart. Amen.
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ENDNOTES
1 Peter 5:5
