Thou shalt not commit adultery Exodus 20:1-14
There were three guys who escaped from Dorchester prison; one of them was from Moncton, one from Shediac and the other guy was from Cape Breton. They ran through the fields and hitched a ride in the back of a pick-up truck and made it to the Amherst mall. And just when they thought they were free they saw a cop car pulling up in front of them. So, the guy from Moncton said, “Everybody act cool and don’t give them your right name whatever you do.” But, the cop was suspicious of them because he had never seen any of them around before. So, he started asking them who they were.
The guy from Moncton looked around and saw the various restaurant signs and said, “My name is Johnny MacDonald.” Then the guy from Amherst looked across the street and when he saw the car dealership he said, “I’m Tommy Ford.” But, the guy from Cape Breton was kind of stumped for a second and couldn’t see any other names, so he said, “My name is Ken.” And the police officer asked, “Ken who?” And he said, Ken-tucky Fried Chicken”
“And God spake all these words, saying, I am the LORD thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me; and shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates: for in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day, and hallowed it. Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee. Thou shalt not kill. Thou shalt not commit adultery.”
Today we’re looking at that last verse, “Thou shalt not commit adultery” and this verse was the key to what’s known as the Wicked Bible. Now, way back in 1631 there was a translation of the Bible that was published by Robert Barker and Martin Lucas and they were the royal printers in London. The king had commissioned them to put out this translation they put every penny they into this but during the last phase of the printing their printer asked them for a raise. Well, they said no and he was so angry that he took the word ‘not’ out of the eighth commandment, ‘Thou shalt not commit adultery.’ So, it read, “Thou shalt commit adultery” and without knowing this the men printed the first thousand copies and when word came to the king he ordered the entire printing destroyed and they were fined 300 pounds which was a years salary. Today, there’s actually eleven of them left and one is on the internet for sale for $89,500. So, this was an important commandment back then and it still is today.
The first four of these commandments deal with our relationship to God and they tell us we are to worship God and God alone. I mean, nothing and no one is ever to take the place of God. We are to worship Him from our heart and according to the word of God and He also tells us we are not to use any kind of image to represent Him whether it’s physical or even mental one.
And then we’re told; we are never to take His name in vain. Now, let me ask you a very simple question. Who was God talking to? Well, obviously, He was talking to believers when He gave these commandments and He’s still talking to believers today. I mean, since the non-believer doesn’t even believe there is a God; there was no sense warning him about taking God’s name in vain. So, this is telling those of us who believe in God, how we are to show respect not only for God’s name and ultimately this also refers to how we live our lives because if we live like the rest of the world, then we are taking His name in vain.
I remember when I bought my first car. I might have told you about it before; it was a beautiful light blue 1963 Valiant with a push button transmission and I only paid $300 for it. I was so proud of that car; but I was also a Christian and I was concerned that my car might somehow come between me and God and so, I committed it to Him. And then about a week after I got it; a friend asked if he could borrow it to drive someone downtown. So, I reluctantly gave it to him and told him where the insurance and registration were and then said to the Lord “It’s your car not mine, so, it’s in your hands.” And about a half an hour later my friend called and said, “I am so glad you told me where the insurance was because someone hit me from behind and drove me into another car.
My insurance company gave me three hundred dollars for the car and then the guy I had bought it from, said he could fix it in about a week and he had it back on the road and charged me about three hundred dollars. So, it was the same car except it had a few metal patches on it and slightly different colors of paint. It kind of looked like an old well worn pair of blue jeans.
About this time, I got a call from the Galco Food Company and they were a division of Heinz, the ketchup people and I went through a series of interviews and they offered me a job with the provision that I drive my own car for the first three months. Well, I agreed but when my boss came out and saw the car he said he couldn’t believe his eyes. Now, at first I thought he was impressed but then he warned me that no customer was ever to see this car. He told me, if I couldn’t park it in a back alley I was to walk a block or two. You see, his concern was that this car misrepresented the image of the company.
But listen; God is not so concerned about the image we present as He is with the essence of who we are. It’s our character that stands out long after people forget what clothes we wore, how our hair was cut or what car we drove. And it’s our character that tells people who we are and what we really believe.
That why the apostle Paul would say in Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but such as is good for edifying as the need may be, that it may give grace to them that hear.” And what Paul was saying was, if you say what’s right you’ll be a blessing to others but if you don’t; you’ll be nothing more than a spiritual nuisance. And then when James spoke about our tongues or what we say he said, "but the tongue can no man tame; it is a restless evil, it is full of deadly poison. Therewith bless we the Lord and Father; (Now, who does this? The believers, that’s who.) and therewith curse we men, who are made after the likeness of God: out of the same mouth cometh forth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.” So, from these verses, as well as many others, it’s easy to see that the words we use and the things we say, really do matter; because our words should always be used to be building others up and not tearing them down. So, we are not to take the name of the Lord in vain. In other words, being called a Christian ought to mean something both to us and to the people we meet.
I knew a guy who was well known as a member of a Baptist church in Ontario and he had been a salesman for a large car dealership. So, when I needed a car I went to him. And around Christmas time I was at the dealership getting something done and I saw this guy in the lot and stepped out to say hello but he kind of busy rearranging several cases of liquor in his trunk. And when he saw the look on my face he said, “Oh, those aren’t mine, I buy these for my corporate customers.” I remember thinking; maybe being a Christian only meant something to him on Sundays. Listen, we represent God everywhere we go and in everything we do and in the way we do it.
And then we’re told in the fourth commandment that we’re to take a break from the routine matters of life and spend time in the presence of God, at least one day a week and the purpose of this is to remind ourselves that the rest of the week belongs to Him. Hebrews 10:25 says, “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.” It’s simply a commandment to be faithful.
And then, the fifth commandment is, “Honor your mother and your father” and the heart of this commandment is respect for authority, because as I said, if you can’t get along with those who love you, then you’re really going to have a problem with the rest of the world.
Sociologists tell us that 80% of the people in prison come from broken homes. Do you see the connection? God is a God of order and He has established the order of the home to be the foundation stone of every society. And if children don’t respect the authority of their parents, they’re going to have a problem with the authorities at school and later on they’ll also have problems with the law. Respect for the authority of God starts in the home and those who are rebellious toward their parents, their teachers and then their boss are never going to have a credible witness for Jesus Christ.
And then last week, we looked at the sixth commandment, “Thou shalt not murder” and as I said, murder is the premeditated act of taking someone else’s life. And we saw in the gospel of Matthew where Jesus said God evaluates our actions by the attitudes behind them. In other words, God sees the action of murder and the act of gossip or slander as being equal. All of these are motivated by anger because one is killing the body but the other is destroying someone’s reputation and even though one is considered more drastic than the other, they’re both killing an aspect of life. Listen, we need to be in control of our temper if people are to believe that we’re indwelt by the Spirit of Jesus Christ. There’s a Hindu Proverb that says, "There is nothing noble about being superior to another. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self." We’ve got to be in control of our temper rather than having our temper controlling us. Will Rogers once said that "people who fly into a rage seldom make a good landing."
And today, we come to the seventh commandment, “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” And adultery is simply the act of engaging in sexual activity with someone other than the person you’re married to.
I And the first thing I want to point out is; the seriousness of the sin of adultery. In the Old Testament it was punishable by death. Leviticus 20:10 says, “The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbors wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.” Now listen, this is God speaking and He says, if you do this, you’re both going to die and then you’re both going to stand before Me. There are a lot of people who seem to be getting away with everything but some day they’re sin is going to be exposed in the very presence of God Himself.
Now, the act of adultery is so common today that people are becoming morally insensitive. It’s the old saying, “Everyone’s doing it; so it’s no big deal.” I remember when I was growing up one of the most well known adulteresses, I mean, actresses, was Elizabeth Taylor and she was married eight times to seven different men. She married Conrad Hilton, Michael Wilding, Michael Todd, Eddie Fisher, Richard Burton twice, then John Warner and finally Larry Fortensky. She seemed to change husbands like the seasons. She and her kind remind me of Proverbs 30:20 that says, “This is the way of an adulterous woman: she eats and wipes her mouth, and says; I have done no wickedness.”
Now, think about these simple verses. They tell us, she’s got a good appetite, she’s not wrestling with guilt or remorse and we certainly don’t expect to see any change in her behaviour because as far as she’s concerned she hasn’t done anything wrong.
I remember when I first started playing guitar; my fingers got so sore after practicing for fifteen or twenty minutes that I felt like I had picked up a hot coal from the fire. But, I was determined to learn and after a few weeks of practicing every day I developed a callous on my fingers and I got to the point where I could play for an hour straight and it didn’t bothered me anymore.
One summer I went on the road with a band and we played from Toronto to North Bay and then we went all the way across to Vancouver stopping and playing in parks, coffee shops, prisons and malls. Sometimes we played anywhere from one to three concerts a day and after eight weeks it felt like my fingers were hard as nails. It was the constant repetition of doing the same thing over and over again.
And listen; the same thing can happen to our hearts when we do something we once thought was wrong and then continue to do it over and over again. We harden our hearts and dull our conscience and begin to see others who don’t do these things as being legalistic or narrow minded. But listen, there is a payday someday! And someday, you and I will stand all by ourselves and give account for everything we’ve said and done in the presence of God Himself. Listen, ‘everybody was doing it’ isn’t going to work because everybody else won’t be there.
You know what the strange thing is about having calluses on your fingers; they go away when you haven’t played the guitar for a while. And the good news is; the same thing happens when we repent or turn away from sin. God softens our hearts and enables us to enjoy life the way He meant it to be.
Now, as I said, the sin of adultery is serious because there are consequences and it often results in divorce. And in Mathew 19:9 we have what many theologians refer to as the exception clause, where Jesus said, “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness and marries another woman commits adultery.” And I’d like to tell you where I stand on divorce and remarriage but I don’t want to base a position on one verse and I’d also have to be honest and tell you that I’m a little confused about this whole topic. For instance, two people who are Christians could never get divorced but if you were divorced as a non-Christian and remarried then it doesn’t count. Or, if a Christian was married to a non-Christian and the non-Christian decided to divorce them; are they free to marry another Christian or not? If you said, “Yes” would you marry them in the church and run the risk of having other divorcees demand the same service and if you said, “No’ would you be punishing them for being married before they were saved?
As a pastor I have a blanket rule and that’s that everyone gets one run down the aisle and after that they have to go somewhere else to get married.
When I discussed the issue of adultery with my wife she said, “If you’re ever guilty of adultery you won’t have to worry about this or any other verse because you’ll never live long enough to understand it.”
The fact is, very few marriages survive after one of the partners has commit adultery because the innocent party sees their partner as someone who has violated a sacred oath that was made in the presence of God, their families and their closest friends. So, their logic is; how could this person ever be trusted again? But listen, there are also those who have repented, been forgiven and then went on to live a life with their husband or wife that glorifies God.
And yet, if we looked at the early church we’d see there were consequences to those who committed adultery. For instance, it was a cause for church discipline. In 1 Corinthians 5:1-13 we have the account of a man who was sleeping with his step-mother and Paul said in verse 4, “When you are assembled in the name of our Lord Jesus and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, hand this man over to Satan, so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord.” And then he sums up his message in verse 13 where he said, “Expel the wicked man from among you.” I think Paul would say; take the adulterer off the membership roll, don’t allow them to have any responsibilities in the church and tell them to keep their money too. After all, you don’t want to give anybody the opportunity to feel as though they’re buying their way back in. (I mean, that’s what you what do if you really believed this stuff.) But, if they repented, we’d forgive them for this as well as for any other sin.
We also see the scripture tells us; adultery leads to an early grave. In Proverbs 7:27 it speaks of the adulteress’ house and it says, “Her house is a highway to the grave, leading down to the chambers of death.” And then in the end the adulterer faces the condemnation of God. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 says, “Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.”
Listen, God has a good reason to say, “Thou shalt not commit adultery” because He knew it could result in a death sentence, a seared conscience, a divorce, expulsion from the church and in the end, His judgment. Adultery is serious sin.
Most of us hear this and our reaction is one of relief because we’re glad we haven’t done that. But, there’s a problem because we come to the New Testament and Jesus says, not only are you not to do it but you aren’t even to think about it.
Listen, the act of adultery is the symptom of the underlying problem. And again, in Matthew 5:27-30 Jesus deals with the attitude behind the action where He says, “But I say unto you that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Now, when Jesus said, “I say unto you” why did He feel He had to clarify what Moses had already said? Well, the Pharisees had focused their teachings entirely on the act that was forbidden in the law; rather than the intent of the law, which was to deal with the heart. So, Jesus explained that the reason the act is wrong is because of the selfish attitude behind it. And then He went on to explain why the lust of the heart was the same as the act of adultery when He said, “Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her in his heart.” And what He was saying was; the one who commits the act and the one who thinks about it, are both guilty of the same thing in the sight of God.
Listen, the primary problem is the heart. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful and desperately wicked, who can know it?” And then in Matthew 15:19 Jesus said, “Out of the heart proceeds evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies.”
It’s a heart issue. I mean; we could take a person with a lustful heart and completely lock them in either a prison or some kind of monastery completely away from the opposite sex but that’s not going to change their heart. The person will be just as sinful as they ever were and they’ll find another way of expressing their sinfulness. The particular sin of lust expresses itself through the eyes but the lustful look is always a symptom of the lustful heart.
And the phrase “looketh to lust” describes not an incidental glance but an intentional and repeated stare. This person is always looking to satisfy their evil desires. This phrase ‘looketh to lust’ can also be translated ‘he looketh to get her to lust.’ In other words, he or she is giving the other person the eye. They’re attempting to get that person to relate to them on a sexual level. They’re trying to get them to share their immoral perspective with the idea of getting them to compromise.
And then I also want you to see that committing adultery wasn’t just treated as a breach of moral purity but it was also a kind of theft. But; what was stolen? Well, to lust after someone is to treat them as less than they were created to be. So, what we’re doing is stealing the respect that’s due that person. And we’re being insensitive to the effect that our thoughts and actions have on this person’s self-image or self-respect by reducing them to being the object of fulfilling our sexual fantasies. Now; there are some who will say, “It’s a compliment” but it’s not, it’s really a put down because what that person is really saying is, “You are only important to the extent that you fulfill my sexual desires.”
The term ‘committing adultery’ with her in his heart could also be translated, ‘to injure her adulterously.’ Listen, Jesus is recognizing and protecting the rights of the victim of someone’s lust.
The act of looking to lust is an attempt to feed this inner sensual desire as a substitute for the act of adultery and so in essence it’s the same thing. Don’t forget, when we do something in our hearts, God is looking on the heart. So, how serious is the sin of adultery; it’s serious enough for us to deal with it before God does.
II So, that adultery, and my second point is, what do we do about it?
There’s a simple solution in Matthew 5:29-30, it says, “And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”
In Jewish culture the right hand and the right eye represented a person’s most precious faculties. Now, I don’t want to be too gross but there’s something you have to understand in order to get what being said here. When Sally and I were in the Middle East at a border crossing; a public toilet was often just an outhouse and in this little shack there would be a hole in the ground and two footprints in front of the hole and there was also a hose off to the side. So, there was no flushing and no paper. These people just went to the bathroom and then they’d use the hose to wash themselves and they dried their bodies and their hands on their robes.
Now, get this, you always used your left hand for everything you had to do, never your right. So, you would never hand someone something or take something with your left hand because that was considered very rude. But, what would you do, if you didn’t have a right hand? Well, you were in trouble. And if you lost your right eye; well, that was the eye you used for hunting and you could end up starving to death.
And yet here Jesus said, “If your right eye offends you, pluck it out or if your right hand causes you to sin cut it off.” Jesus is not endorsing a some form of self-mutilation but He’s using a figure of speech and He’s saying, there are things in our lives that are such strong sources of temptation that we’d be better off spiritually if we just got rid of them altogether even though we consider them to be as precious as one of our hands or one of our eyes.
Listen, we need to cut off any relationship that hinders rather than helps our spiritual growth. We need to cut off any form of entertainment that fills our minds with filth rather than moves us closer to God. We need to cut off any habit that causes people to question whether or not we’re even saved. We need to cut off going anywhere a Christian shouldn’t be going. And what we really need is to hear is what Jesus said to Peter, “Lovest thou Me more than these?”
So, how serious is the sin of adultery? It’s serious enough to deal with it before God does. What do we do about it? We need to seriously consider the things we do and who we do them with.
III How do we protect ourselves from the sin of adultery?
Well, just as the problem starts in the heart; so does the solution. We begin by confession and the word ‘confess’ simply means to agree with God. We need to agree with His assessment of our sin. After all, our lust isn’t just daydreaming, it’s sin; and we need to be serious about the things that fan the flames of lust in our hearts. Constantly feeding our minds with sex will eventually lead us to seeing others as a means of fulfilling our sexual desires or as simply being expendable rather than souls for whom Jesus died. And we also need to cleansed by the word of God. I like how Ephesians 5:26 speaks of, “The washing of water of the word.” We need to be daily bathing our minds in the word of God.
Now, that’s the spiritual side and now I want to deal with the practical. And I believe every Christian ought to set up some personal guidelines to keep themselves from the place of temptation.
We often wonder when we see the results of adultery what the people were thinking when they headed down that road. Surely, no one got up in the morning and asked themselves, “How can I wreck my home, lose the respect of my children and destroy every ounce of credibility I’ve ever head?” No, they think about the fun, the freedom and the sexual fulfillment but like all of Satan’s promises they soon find out that the pleasure of sin is short and that they’ve taken the road of no return. Listen, adultery is a dead end street.
In our own minds, all of us need to visualize the consequences of adultery. Imagine having to tell your marriage partner that you’ve been unfaithful and then imagine the emotional pain and sense of betrayal that would follow.
So, how do we avoid this from happening? First, watch where you go and who you’re with. I remember when I attended the Word of Life Bible Institute in New York; I thought they had the craziest rules in the world. They told you how often you should bath and brush your teeth, how you should have your hair cut, how to properly wear your clothes and they even had what was known as a third party rule. And that meant, that other than my wife, I was never to be alone in a room or a car with another woman unless there was a third party present and do you know what the odd part was; it didn’t matter how old she was. If I was to find myself alone with another woman I was simply to leave. They even went as far as spelling out specifics.
For instance, if I was driving down the road and saw a woman in an emergency situation I could offer her a ride but; she had to sit in the back seat on the right hand side. (And as dumb as these rules were, no one who ever obeyed them ever got caught in immorality.)
Watch where you go and who you’re with. You can be involved in an absolutely innocent situation and a non-Christian could see you with someone other than the person you’re married to and they’ll start the talk; “You’ll never believe what those Baptists are up to now.” I know some will say, “Oh, you’re just acting like a prude.” But, given the choice I’d rather be called a prude than an adulterer.
Here’s a principle in life you ought to write on the flyleaf of your Bible. “If you avoid the appearance of evil; you’ll avoid the evil.” Watch where you go and who you’re with.
Second, watch what you say. In Ephesians 5:3 and 4 Paul said, “But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints; neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not convenient: but rather giving of thanks.” This obscenity, foolish talk and coarse joking all carry the idea of joking about sex or joking about having an affair.
One Christian man told how he became involved with a woman in his office. He said every day he’d walk in and tell his secretary how pretty she looked and she was pretty but her husband never noticed or never said anything if he did. Subconsciously, she started dressing for the compliments she got at the office. He fulfilled the need her husband neglected and pretty soon the innocent compliments ended up destroying two marriages.
Dr. James Dobson said. “The key is for the husband and wife to meet each other’s needs and for other people to mind their own business.”
So, we’re to watch where we go and who we’re with because there’s always someone else watching us as well. First, there’s the Holy Spirit who wants us to do right and second there’s the devil who always wants us to do wrong.
And then third, we need to watch how we touch. Now, this is difficult to deal with from the standpoint that most Baptists aren’t exactly the touchy feely type to start with but we also need to be aware of the fact that an innocent gesture can easily be misconstrued by someone who is starved for affection at home.
Listen, we need to be conscious of our sinfulness, have some practical guidelines to protect ourselves and third, in spite of all the precautions we can take; sometimes the answer to our problems is found in Paul’s exhortation where he said; “Flee youthful lusts.” In other words, just get out of the situation as fast as you can. In other areas of temptation God can and does provide victory but in the area of sexual temptation your best defense is the nearest exit.
Conclusion
If the sin of adultery brings nothing but bad news we can thank the Lord who loves us we have good news as well. I Corinthians 6:9-11 says, “Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you: (And here’s the good news) but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.”
Listen, the God who said, “Thou shalt not commit adultery” also said, “Whosoever comes to Me I will in no wise cast out.” And all of us are welcome, whether we were idolaters, adulterers, murderers or even church members. Whosoever comes, He says, He will in no wise cast out.
