How to work together in ministry
We have been studying the book of Philippians the last two months. The theme of Philippians is a joy filled life. The word joy is mentioned 17 times in this book. In Philippians Paul gives examples of what it means to be a humble joy filled servant. First he gives us the example of Jesus ‘who for the joy set before Him endured the cross.’ Then he places before them his own life. He is writing from prison and chained to a Roman guard. Yet he still writes ‘rejoice in the Lord always.’ He next example is his Christian co-workers Timothy and Ephraditus, his dear friends in the ministry.
This week on one website for pastors they asked this question ‘Do you have more joy than you did ten years ago?’ 82% of pastors who responded said they did. This is in spite of the fact that a recent survey about pastors concluded:
“Being a spiritual leader of other people creates unusual relational dynamics and expectations. One of those areas is often a lost sense of connection with others. A majority of pastors (61%) admit that they "have few close friends." Also, one-sixth of today’s pastors feel under-appreciated. Pastors also deal with family problems: one in every five contends that they are currently "dealing with a very difficult family situation."
This is 100% accurate. Just three weeks ago one pastor after publicly sharing told me he felt like a failure. He has trouble praying and feels like resigning. I have found that to be the case with just about every pastor I ever served under. The last one lay on the floor and wept in his office. He often thought I had more joy being a pilot.
What is the secret? The secret, whether a pastor or not, is that the joy of the Lord be your strength.
Paul knew that he was passing on. People like Timothy saw that. Their focus was not to sit-back and watch the super-saints serve everyone else. They stepped up to the plate. They were - arm-in-arm with Paul - doing the work of enhancing people’s lives for God’s glory." They were quality friends.
As you have read this passage this week I wonder if you thought about ‘what is the quality of a good friend.’ It is a serious question. One survey I read said that 90% of men say they do not have even one close friend. So quality friendships are important.
Why did the Apostle Paul single out these two friends? What qualities did they have?
Paul was a church planter. There were few people he spent long periods of time with. In fact as far as I can tell Paul only discipled one person in his life and that was Timothy.
Before I look at the lives of Paul’s companions I want to make a fundamental assertion about ministry.
1. Your first loyalty is to Jesus and the leading of the Holy Spirit, not to me
When were praying together, loving Jesus first and seeking the direction of the Holy Spirit there will be no disputes about the direction of the ministry.
When we pray first, and then work together Christ will give us one heart and mind to follow Him together. That is why the most important ministry of the church is prayer. From prayer God reveals who the leaders should be. Without prayer and godly leaders no church will make it. Without prayer together we will be divided.
God is able to provide for us if we trust him and pray. I listed about twenty prayer requests for this church. One is for Teen Challenge to come and do a Hip Hop Concert in the community. Within one day Teen Challenge called. They said we want to do an outreach concert in your area.
I thought great, when God opens the door he will provide the resources, Fresh I.E. is coming. They usually charge in excess of $5,000 but said ‘count it as a gift.’ That is how the Spirit directs through prayer.
So our first loyalty is to Jesus, prayer and the direction of the Holy Spirit.
My first loyalty is not to you, it is to Jesus. Do not become so possessive of your companions or demand that their first loyalty be to you above all else. That is blasphemy. I desire you to be loyal to me; that is in the Bible. But I am not your first loyalty. Jesus is.
Before we look more in depth at this passage let me give you a scriptural example of what I am talking about.
Let’s take the example of Apollos. Apollos was a preacher Paul had met. Paul had wanted him to go to Corinth, but Apollos said no. He said it is not the right time (1st Co. 16:12). Apollos first loyalty was to Christ and the direction of the Holy Spirit in his life, not to Paul.
In similar vein I have been very saddened by people that have left this church and moved away. They were people who were very excited about Calvary, great prayer supporters and co-workers in the ministry. I really did encourage them to stay and work in the ministry here but God directed them elsewhere.
Jesus said the most important thing is to love God and to love people. We all need friends.
There was a study done by a Harvard scientist. He looked at 7,000 people. They found that those people who were isolated were three times more likely to die than those relationally connected. They even discovered that those who worked out and ate well but were isolated were likely to die sooner also.
In other words you’re better off eating Twinkies with friends than broccoli alone.
This week I prayed on the phone with a senior from another Province. She said she was so lonely she was ready to go to heaven.
I have been around long enough to know that there are many Christians who have few or no meaningful relationships. They may achieve great wealth and may be driven to success. We spend our time digitally connecting through a whole list of people on Facebook but seldom share a bowl of soup with someone.
Isolated people come to the end of their lives and mostly have regrets.
But one couple I know has lots of wealth. They support two families in full time ministry. They are over 70 now. Every Sunday afternoon they go to the reserves and share the gospel with Aboriginal people. They have a joy filled life.
Sadly many Christians say they are very lonely. Every church I have been in people have shared they attended for a long time and nobody ever invited them over to their home.
One of our commitments to this church for 2009 is to have someone in our home to share soup with every Sunday afternoon.
Will you pick up the challenge?
Loneliness, relationships? I wonder if the Apostle Paul ever felt lonely being chained to a different Roman guard every four hours? Life was not going well. He was awaiting execution. Yet he was surrounded by godly friends who encouraged him in the Lord. With Paul they served Jesus and that is what gave them hope.
Last weekend at Ignition the students were coming in with tears streaming down their face. Last weekend a 24 year old committed suicide. Loneliness, hopelessness. We parents think it could not happen to us.
The Apostle Paul was a church planter and not a pastor at heart. If he was here I doubt he would be the one to do marriage counseling, have people in his home, have a men’s breakfast, or lead a Bible study. Paul was an evangelist. He therefore looked for people who would complement his ministry. He looked for pastors like Timothy whom he could leave behind to build up the body of Christ.
Who was Timothy?
He was a young man who honored God. He was a young disciple who was Paul’s companion on his early missionary journeys. His mother, Eunice, and his grandmother, Lois, are mentioned as pious people (2 Tim. 1:5). We know that his father was a Greek and not likely a believer (Acts 16:1).
He was from Lystra and was converted during Paul’s first visit to that place (1 Tim. 1:2; 2 Tim. 3:11). After conversion he was known as Paul’s son in the faith. He was designated to the office of an evangelist (1 Tim. 4:14), and went with Paul in his journey through Phrygia, Galatia, and Mysia; also to Troas and Philippi and Berea (Acts 17:14).
He followed Paul to Athens, and was sent by him with Silas on a mission to Thessalonica (17:15; 1 Thess. 3:2). We next find him at Corinth (1 Thess. 1:1; 2 Thess. 1:1) with Paul. He eventually became the apostle at Ephesus (Acts 19:22). They sent him on a mission into Macedonia. He accompanied Paul afterwards into Asia (20:4).
Church history says he settled in Ephesus where he served as resident pastor and there became a martyr for the faith.
Then we have Ephraditus. We know less about him than Timothy. But we do know he had all the same qualities. In fact Paul says he risked his very own life for the gospel. These are the people who lived and died with Paul for the sake of the gospel.
Paul cared about others and invested his life in them. Paul’s friends lived magnificent and joy filled lives, even though they are not remembered or esteemed in our society.
How did they complement Paul?
You will notice the Apostle says several things about them:
1. Timothy was unselfish
Paul says I have no one else like him. Timothy and Ephraditus were Christians who were not in it for the glory, which is an oxymoron. There is no glory in ministry. Timothy left his hometown, family, friends and other opportunities to serve Jesus.
Close friends affirm one another. Look at Paul in this passage. He is just bragging about Timothy and Ephraditus. D.L. Moody said people will become what you encourage them to be, not what you nag them to become.
Now it is easy to encourage and lift up someone you admire. But what about someone you don’t admire? What about someone who does not see things your way? Are you going to encourage them? (Romans 15:7). (For sale – as is – God accepts us, extends grace to us, forgives us – you do the same to other).
In Proverbs 17 it says a friend loves at all time.
Say what you want about Timothy, Paul would say, but I know his heart. He genuinely cares about you. He cares about the interests of Jesus first. Paul says I can send some others to minister to you, but there is none like this guy. They had a kindred spirit. They both planted churches and reached the lost for Christ. They were obedient to the Great Commission. They never looked at reaching others as an option. It is not an option. They did ministry together. They were stuck together like glue. Timothy and Ephraditus and Paul.
2. Secondly these friends recognized spiritual authority.
Paul said he is like a son with a Father. In other words Timothy worked with Paul and not against him. Timothy would recognize the spiritual authority that God had placed upon his life. His attitude was you lead and I will follow. He rolled up his sleeves and said ‘how can I help.’ Here I am. Send me. Paul wrote to the Philippians and said ‘I hope to send Timothy to you as soon as I can.” Timothy would go and do what Paul asked him to.
That is the sign of a solid friend in the ministry.
Paul also had his detractors. John Mark left him. Barnabus left Paul. There were others that could not work with him. Should you have to work with a difficult leader or boss, seek to learn all you can about yourself and about God; there may be some very important lessons God wants to teach you.
Running from the situation is the Bait of Satan. Timothy and Ephraditus stuck it out with Paul. When he was doing missionary work they stuck it out with him. When he was in jail they came to support him.
We live in a day when there is no respect for authority. I give my mother credit for that one. She taught me to respect authority. Because of her I have never had authority issues in my life. Paul’s friends supported him and respected his authority.
3. Thirdly Timothy and Ephraditus were available
Both these co-workers made themselves available regardless of the obstacles. When I think of the reasons why people do not serve in the church I shudder. When I think of the flimsy reasons why people leave the churches in North America I shake. Usually the common ones are I don’t like the pastor, all they talk about is money, or I don’t like the music. There are days when we do not want to come here; will not get up an hour early to come and pray.
Yet people in China, India, and in Gaza are risking their lives for the sake of the gospel.
Look at what Paul’s associates put up with. The distances traveled by these men were nothing short of staggering. They traveled the equivalent of 13,400 air miles.
Think about this. They had no airplanes, cars, or all terrain vehicles. They traveled by foot through mountainous terrain. They went through unsafe areas where they were beaten and left for dead. These areas were controlled by bandits and thieves. Even when Paul was in jail his friends would risk their lives for him and gospel. They were committed to the cause. There was no turning back for his co-workers.
It is not like he had a big crowd of supporters. I don’t think Paul had a lot of friends. What does the Bible say about that?
Proverbs 18:24 (NIV) A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Why does the Bible say a man of many companions come to ruin? It is because those friends are superficial. They want to talk about the hockey scores, the weather, and the fishing. That is all they talk about. Their relationship with you is superficial. These relationships do not stand up during a crisis.
On the other hand there is one who sticks to you closer than a brother. The Bible has in mind a good brother, one who will be there for you no matter what. We need more than surface level friendships.
Lee Iacocca found that out. Lee was the President of Ford Motor Company. He got fired. In his autobiography he wrote ‘I was hurting pretty bad. After getting fired I thought it would be great to have coffee with one of my friends. Not one of them would take the time. They were all corporate executives. They were surface level friends. They all revolved around business and golfing.’
Paul, Timothy and Ephraditus had a friendship that was focused on eternal things. As a result their relationships were powerfully enriched. You get fired up for Jesus and serving with others and you won’t have time to be negative. Your priorities will all change. You will know that your time is being spent on eternal things; things that are really going to matter in the end.
When ministry went sour and Paul was in prison his friends were there for him. A friend who sticks closer than a brother does not beat you up when you’re down. They pray for you, encourage you and are there to help you.
It is a wonderful thing to have a friend that you have an affinity with. It is wonderful to know they are praying for you and are an encouragement. They are the people that keep me going at Calvary. When you call and say I am praying for you, that is encouraging. When you pray and say God is going to do a work here that is encouraging. The Bible says to encourage one another and all the more as you see the day of Jesus return drawing near.
They are available and fourthly they are:
4. Fourthly he was trustworthy and genuine
Paul says two things in this passage. First he is going to send Timothy to them. Second he is going to have Ephraditus bring this scroll to the church. Paul said both men were trustworthy and genuine. Paul says Timothy proved himself. He was not a man who just talked about what was needed. He prayed, served, and gave. He gave his very life.
Ephraditus did the same thing. Paul says he risked his own life for the sake of the gospel. As we enter 2009 what risks are you going to take for the sake of the gospel?
When we have attitudes like ‘what is in it for me’ that is not God’s way.’ But when we serve with an attitude of ‘I am serving the king’ people will want to be around us.
I want you to stop and think of three to five people you want to see come to Christ in 2009. Have you got them in your mind? Now if we as a church cannot get past things like budgets, constitutions, direction, then how do you expect these people to come to faith and be part of this faith community? Are you willing to become Timothy in this church? Are you willing to become an Ephraditus for the sake of the kingdom? God did not call those men to worry about everyone else. He called them to serve Jesus through some trying circumstances in the ministry. They did it. They were a godly example to others. They rolled up their sleeves and Paul could say ‘I have nobody else like them.’ When we serve Jesus with those kinds of attitudes there is no stopping what he can do in our lives and faith community. Will you be that person who comes alongside us here in 2009?
Conclusion
Gary Inrig’ story in his book Quality Friendships
Years ago one family had a son who was in the Korean War. They had not heard from him for 10 months and were very concerned. Time went on and the war ended. Finally their son called home. The mother was excited. She said come on home son. He said I will but first I have a request. I have a buddy from the war that has been banged up pretty bad. He has only one arm, one leg, and one eye. I would like him to come and stay with us. The mother said great son, let him come for a week and let’s see how it goes.
He says no mother you don’t understand. This friend is really banged up. He is going to need a lot of help. I am asking you if he can come and live with us permanently.
At this point the mother objected. She said ‘son you don’t know how difficult this is going to be. That is going to be a serious time commitment and a real drag on everyone. Son this it too much for us. But please come home.
At that point the telephone clicked dead. The next day the Army personnel came to see the mother. They said their son had committed suicide the night before. They needed to come to the morgue and identify the body.
So the parents went to the morgue. When they did they confirmed that was their son, with one arm, one leg and one eye.
While I have some difficulty in a son who would set up parents like that, the story makes its point. But it does communicate how much we need to be accepted by one another.
Friends this is a society with banged up people. We serve Jesus who specializes in restoring banged up people like you and I.
Are we going to pull together as friends in the ministry? Are we going to open our hearts, lives, homes and wallets to people banged up in life? Jesus said I will build my church but we have a role to play. Will you become a Timothy or Ephraditus in this church?
