THE HIDDEN COMMANDMENT - Telling yourself the truth.
I want to talk to you this morning about the hidden commandment.
Mk 12:28-31. Did you hear it? Love your neighbour as you love yourself ... we need to love ourselves! But do we?
Woody Allen: “my one regret is that I am not someone else” If we are honest with ourselves I’m sure, that even if we haven’t said that, we have at least thought it. Why is it that so many people dislike themselves?
If we had to do a survey here this morning, I’m sure we’d get many different answers ... but they’d all come down to the same thing: The reason we don’t like ourselves is because of the lies we keep telling ourselves. If this is true, it is obvious then that the answer is to tell ourselves the truth, but before we can do that we need to identify what the lies are.
So let’s look at some Biblical characters - great men of God - who never loved themselves and see if we can identify with some of the lies they told themselves.
1. Lie # 1 “I AM USELESS”
a) Exod 4:10 (niv) Moses said to the LORD, "O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue."
b) Moses saw only the negative -
Some people are very good at this - bucket ministry
DIRTY WINDOW SYNDROME. If you look through a dirty window, everything looks dirty.
If I feel bad about myself, how do you think I’ll act?
c) So often we lump unnecessary guilt on ourselves - “I’m such a useless Christian”
d) What does God say to this lie?
i) There is now no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus
ii) You are not useless because you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you
2. Lie # 2 “THE WAY TO BE LIKED BY OTHERS IS TO BE WHAT THEY WANT ME TO BE”
a) Ex 2:11-17 Two interesting incidents in the life of Moses. Why did Moses risk his life in both these situations? I don’t know
b) BUT I do know that people with a poor self esteem will do crazy things just to get people to like them. It is very noble to risk your life for someone else, but when the motive is to please man instead of God, it becomes destructive ... we start telling ourselves the 2nd lie...
c) which leads to more lies
i) It is more Christian to please others than myself
d) I think I’ve lived most of my life trying to please others - and you know what I found “you can’t please everyone” - end up becoming a schizophrenic
e) What is God’s response to this?
To fear God is the beginning of wisdom.
3. Lie # 3 “I AM UNIMPORTANT” Jud 6:12-15
a) vs 15 who is mentioned the most?
b) Ironic but true that people who have a low self esteem are actually very self centred. - they are always thinking about themselves and their problems
c) this self centredness is a sure fire formula for depression:
i) person devalues self ... least important member
ii) devalue situation ... God isn’t with us
iii) devalue prospects for the future ...
• He divorced me because I’m not a good wife
• I’m over the hill and not very beautiful anymore, what chance do I have of getting married again.
• I’m not going to get any younger I may as well drown my sorrows.
d) Does God think we are unimportant?
i) If you see a big colour TV being sold for R50 what’s your first thought? What’s the catch? It must be broken? ... It can’t be worth it. THE PRICE DETERMINES THE WORTH. God thinks we are so valuable that he paid for us with the life of his only son!
4. Lie # 4 “I can’t make a decision”
a) Go and destroy those pagans, “Um ... how can I be sure ... ?”
b) If you don’t love yourself, you’ll never be confident to make a decision
c) JOKE A young lady was being interviewed for a job. She was asked if she struggled to make decisions ... “Well Yes, and No”
d) People like this are prone to become moral pushovers CHIEF WHOSEMORALSARELASTIX.
Teenager phoned me yesterday: “on camp things were fine but when I got back home I started hanging out with these guys who smoke, and now I’ve started smoking dagga with them. Is it wrong?”
e) We may not believe in ourselves but God believes in us. He says:
i) Be bold, be strong, for the Lord your God is with you.
ii) If you lack wisdom ask God who gives generously without finding fault
5. Lie # 5 I AM NOT READY TO DO ANYTHING FOR God
a) Jere 1:6 (niv) "Ah, Sovereign LORD," I said, "I do not know how to speak; I am only a child."7 But the LORD said to me, "Do not say, `I am only a child.’ You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you.
b) Jeremiah never dreamed that God would ever use him - more than just humility. This is a result of having a negative self image which will prevent you from reaching your full potential in Christ.
c) God says “do not let anyone look down on you because you are young” ... “I have given you every spiritual blessing in Christ Jesus”
d) If we think we are small then our dreams will be small. We need to be like Jabez 1Chr 4:10 (niv) Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.
CONC We all know that we have an enemy ... Satan ... we are in a battle. But how can we defeat the enemy, when we are fighting against ourselves?
Jesus has given us a commandment to love ourselves ... and love is not a feeling ... it is an act of the will. Loving ourselves is something that we must DO.
Two things that we must do.
1. Stop telling ourselves lies. Start telling truths. Read the bible and realise that all those truths apply to you:
We are not useless sinners - because we are “Alive in Christ”; “we are no longer under condemnation”; “He is our righteousness” ... this is the truth and it is the truth that sets us free
2. Get close to Jesus. The easiest way to love yourself.
As a part of an assignment for a doctoral thesis, a college student spent a year with a group of Navajo Indians on a reservation in the Southwest. As he did his research he lived with one family, sleeping in their hut, eating their food, working with them and generally living the life of a 20th century Indian. A close friendship developed between the student and the grandmother. They spent a great deal of time sharing a friendship that was meaningful to each, yet unexplainable to someone else. In spite of the language difference they shared the common language of love and understood each other.
When it was time for him to return to the campus and write his thesis, the tribe held a going-away celebration. It was marked by sadness since the young man had become close to the whole village and all would miss him. As he prepared to get up into the pickup truck and leave, the old grandmother came to tell him goodbye. With tears streaming from her eyes, she placed her hands on either side of his face, looked directly into his eyes and said, "I like me best when I’m with you".
Isn’t that the way we feel in the presence of Jesus? He brings out the best in us. We learn to see ourselves as worthy and valuable when we are in His presence. The hurts, the cares, the disappointments of our life are behind us when we look in His eyes and realise the depth of His love. Our self-esteem no longer depends on what we have done or failed to do; it depends only on the value that He places on us.
