Redefining Relationships
A New Family Dynamic
Joshua 24:14-15
Lawrence D Vinson
MINISTRY IS A FAMILY AFFAIR
I.INTRODUCTION
I realize that over the last eleven months of ministry here that I may sometimes come across as hateful towards the trends of this world. I realize that there are times when I seem to be bashing what our culture deems “normal”. Well, if that’s what you think then I have to say that I would agree; I am not a lover of this world. You have heard the saying before that tells us to, “Be a lover not a fighter” well I am the exact opposite, I am a fighter not a lover. I started this series because I am tired of how culture has transformed the definition of relationships to something that is not of God, they’re not even close. Last week we talked about how our relationship with God must not be fake, but be something very real. We have to have an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ if we are to ever fulfill our roles as Disciples here on Earth. However, that is not the only relationship that must be brought up to the changing table, so to speak. There are many more, and throughout the next three weeks, we will be exploring and redefining these relationships. So, today let us focus on a type of relationship that affects most of our hearts to the core; family.
Most of the families that exist within our society have lost the meaning of the word. We have turned from a community sense of family to a very individualistic sense. If you look at the average family you will see three-to-four people who live very separate lives with separate agendas all going at 100 miles per hour.
It is unfortunate to say that this isn’t just the case with non-Christian families. It is becoming harder and harder in this world to differentiate between Christians and non-Christian, and the family is no exception to this trend. Listen, this should not be the case if we are to be sold-out for Christ, we have to restore the sense of community within our families if we are to have the relationships within our family that God has called us to have.
Let me stress that I am not saying that individuality must be done away with, because I believe fully that God made us individual for a reason; however, our individuality must be a part of our family community. I have to say that I am glad I am not the only one who shares these views. As I was researching this sermon the other day I came across a comment from Glynnis Whitwer from Proverb 31 ministries, listen to what she writes:
“Today it’s rare to see siblings serving alongside each other, either in church or in a ministry outside of church. Parents often focus on allowing each child to explore his or her individual gifts and talents through service – which is a good thing. Then as brothers and sisters grow up, their lives take them away from each other. But what might happen if we initiated opportunities for our children to serve together? What if we served God with our own brothers or sisters at our sides?”
I want to take this quote one step further, what if we served with our entire families? What if we gathered around the living room not to reminisce about the past, but to plan for the future? I believe the only way to restore the community within our families is to begin serving with our family. Ministry is a family affair, and we have to learn that if we are to redefine the relationship within our family.
While this is the goal I don’t think it is obtainable overnight. I believe if you look at God’s Word then you will see a blueprint for how family should look and act. In order for ministry to be a family affair two things must happen: First God has to be put on the top of your family’s list and second, you have to, as a family, make choices to serve Christ daily.
I admit that this is easier said then done, but it is my prayer that by the end of this sermon you will go home encouraged that it can be just as easily done. So, instead of receiving instruction from Proverbs, Ephesians, or the like, let’s turn to what has to be the best example of someone making ministry a family affair. If you have your Bibles, I invite you to turn to Joshua 24 so we, as a family, can explore the two things that must be present in order for ministry to be a family affair. Let’s look at the first thing which says that...
II.BODY
A.God has to be put on the top of our list (Joshua 24:14)
Do you remember the good ’ole days? There are probably some of us here this morning that wish the “good ’ole days” never would have left. Joshua is the same way, because if you look at the surrounding text Joshua has just finished giving his farewell address to the nation of Israel. Within this address Joshua reminded his people of where they came from, but more importantly where God has brought them. What we just read from Joshua 24 verse 14 is to me the beginning of the climax of his message. In essence Joshua is telling the people of Israel to remember the things God has done for them because they are forgetting it all too much in their hearts. He speaks of being sincere and truthful in their service to the Lord, and to destroy the fake gods in their lives so that the real God could live in their lives once again.
Putting God on the top of our list is a simple truth with big rewards. For Israel it meant God’s protection and blessings over their country and let me tell ya, it means the same things for us. Have you ever heard the saying “The family that prays together stays together?” Well, back in 2003 that statement gained some popularity. A survey by the National Study of Youth and Religion at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill found that adolescents ages 12 to 14 reared in religious households are more likely than their peers from nonreligious families to admire their mother and father, to not run away from home, to eat dinner with their parents and to have Mom and Dad involved in their social lives.
"There is a consistent association across a variety of measures that more religiously active families with early adolescents in the household exhibit signs of stronger family relationships," said Christian Smith, study director.
Seventy percent of religious youth wanted to be like their parents, and 90 percent enjoyed spending time with their parents -- versus half and three-quarters respectively of nonreligious youth.
Part of making ministry a family affair means that you must at the same time minister to your family. Prayer is the core of a ministering family, it must be the most important thing a family does. Why? Because prayer is our only way of communicating to God. It forces us, our children, our parents, our siblings, and any other family member to stop their world and focus on Christ.
We are a lot like Israel in Joshua 24. We live in a society that has forgotten what God has done for us, and contrary to popular belief we are not a Godly nation; but you know, that doesn’t mean our families can’t be. Imagine what this nation would be like if everyone held on to the belief that you can have a godly family. Imagine the ramifications of having everyone coming, on a daily basis, to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. This can all become a reality, it just has to start with you.
Now I realize a large majority of you here today are empty-nesters and that your children have families of their own. Please, don’t let that stop you from making Christ the center of your family’s life. Pray with your children, if they won’t pray with you then pray for them. Take Joshua’s advice by being sincere and truthful to your children, in other words, don’t be afraid of sharing Christ with your family no matter what stage of life you are in.
God has put you in your family for a reason. He has given you the brothers and sisters you have for a reason, He has given you the parents you have for a reason. Every struggle you have been given has been for a reason and every blessing the same. Do not let this slip your mind, do not forget what God has done for you, put Him at the top of your list so that your family can begin their ministry.
Joshua wanted the people of Israel to make God the most important thing in their lives, but there is one more thing that Joshua wanted for Israel as he finishes his farewell address. Let’s take a look at Joshua 24 verse 15 because it is here that we learn that...
B.We have to make choices to serve Christ daily (Joshua 24:15)
A.T. Pierson once said, “Whatever is done for God... is [considered] service... Service is, comprehensively speaking, doing the will of God. He is the object. All is for Him, for His sake...[and because of that], even the humblest act of [the] humblest disciple acquires a certain divine quality by its being done with reference to Him.”
This quote for me defines what Joshua is talking about to the Israelites. He just got done telling his extended family that they should make God their top priority, but now he is making his own personal bold statement. Joshua is telling them all that even though he can’t make them choose God, that his house, that is his immediate family, will. Joshua is taking a stand against the corruptions that exist within his own culture and standing for God. Emphatically and Courageously Joshua is standing tall and saying that, “Yes! My family will serve the Lord!”
To serve back in the day of Joshua did not mean going out on a Saturday morning and handing out free water bottles to the public, although that is a great tool. It didn’t mean going to the soup kitchen once a week and feeding the hungry, although that is needed. Serving in the day of Joshua means the same thing that A.T. Pierson just told us, that is, “doing the will of God.” When Joshua uttered the most defining statement of his time, he knew exactly what he was saying. He knew that meant for the rest of his life and for the rest of his family’s life, that everyday they would make the difficult choices of following God’s commands.
In order for us to make such a definitive statement within our own family two things must exist. First we must know God’s commands. This is one of the biggest problems in our country, especially with the younger generation. When I was a youth minister there would be a lot of times when I would run across a group of teens who had no idea what was wrong and what was right. We have to fight for the youth of this country, we have to show them God’s love, and we have to help them understand what God’s Word says about their life.
The second thing that must exist in order for us to make that definitive statement follow God’s commands. Knowing the difference between right and wrong is not enough, we have to add on to that the ability to choose right over wrong. Teaching our families this is essential if we are to claim to serve the Lord in our family.
Look, I realize that this is a logical response, but when you live in an illogical world the logical no longer makes an appearance in the every day conversation. That’s why Joshua brought this up in the first place, this is why he had to say that his house would serve the Lord. He had to interject some sort of logic, otherwise Israel would never have found their way back.
Make this a priority in your family’s life as well. You are in a battle for your family, one that Satan wants you to lose badly, however, if you continue to interject some logic into the craziness of this world, if you continue to serve the Lord, then you will win that battle.
No one said that making ministry a family affair would ever be easy. Joshua knew that and now, hopefully, you know it as well. Making ministry a family affair means that God has to be put on the top of your list and that you have make choices to serve Christ daily. Joshua did it in spite of his cultural trends and now God is asking you to do the same. Before we leave this morning let me share some encouraging words...
III.CONCLUSION
We have a church that has a lot of families that practice ministry together. Just look around and it won’t take long for you to realize that families such as the Burks’, the Reeder’s, the Sahlin’s, and other families of the sort have taken Joshua’s advice and served the Lord as a family.
Everyone in this church can be put into two distinct groups. The first group consists of those who stand against the culture’s desire for individuality and says that “my family will serve Lord together”. If that is you this morning then this is my challenge for you: spread that to as many families as you can. Don’t be afraid of speaking about your struggles and victories with those who have to learn what it means to minister as a family. Joshua wasn’t and the response he got was for the most part positive. You cannot be quiet on this subject, instead you must be as vocal as you can.
The other group that exists within this church are those who have tried to bring their family together but despite their good intentions has found it hard to do so. My challenge to you is this, keep loving your family but change their focus. Instead of focusing on them solely as individuals, help them use their individuality as a connecting piece in the puzzle of your family. Take the example of the families here, take their advice, see where they have struggled and figure out ways to overcome your own battles. Whatever you do, whether you follow my challenges or not, please never give up. If you put Christ on top of your life and if you serve Him daily, then it will happen; your family will become the ministering family that God has called every family to be.
John Paul II once said, “As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world in which we live.” This quote says it all, if you desire to have this world be a better place then it must start with your family. If you don’t then let the status quo of your family’s life continue. There is no better way to end this then restating the words that we just read in Joshua, “Choose for yourselves today whom you will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” The choice is yours.
LET US PRAY.
