STRENGTHENING THE FAMILY IN TODAY’S SOCIETY
Given on Saturday, 14 June 2008
For 1st Annual Family Life Conference
At Shiloh Baptist Church
Waukegan, Illinois
I would like to take this opportunity to thank Sister Loretta Henton and the Mission Department for this awesome opportunity to speak at the Shiloh Baptist Church, Mission Department 1st Annual Family Life Conference. Thank you (X3) for allowing me to be a part of our church’s distinct history.
I want be before you long ... in fact, Sister Henton gave me specific instruction of what she wants me to do in an email, she said and I quote “We are asking you to be the conference speaker, to sum up the whole thing” and it is my prayer to do just that ....
STRENGTHENING THE FAMILY
IN TODAY’S SOCIETY
This is in my opinion a very challenging task (not impossible). How do we carry out the demanding responsibility of raising a family in the world in which we live today?
•EMOTIONAL TOUGHNESS. Some would argue that it takes emotional toughest (you know tough love) to deal with today’s stressful or painful situations. If it is not raising gas prices, it raising food price ... if is not gas and food that concerns us it is the horrors of a senseless war. Some folks call it half a dozen in one hand and six in the other.
• BACK TO THE OLD TIME WAY. While on the other hand ... others would argue that, strengthening the family is an almost impossible task in today’s society, unless we go back to the old time way of support from family, friends, church, and community.
In addition, I would say ... all of that is fine and dandy; yet the complexities of life still beacons the question “HOW” ... how do we strengthen the family in today’s society.
•TOLERANCE. Is the answer tolerance? On the other hand, is it some sort of built in resistance to stress that allows a mother to sleep at night when she knows that her teenage son is out in the streets hustling and up to no good? While others are too scared to sleep wondering if this will be the night; the cops ring her doorbell and tell her “your baby boy is dead.”
However, for some of us, raising a family in this society has become more a misery than a ministry. Allow me to explain ... you see, some people are struggling right now because they are not getting along with one of their children. The simple words “good Morning” somehow turns into an argument.
Some people go to bed worried. It is a misery not a ministry because they do not know, where their kids are or what they are up too.
Allow me to stick a pin right here...and deal with this one for a minute.
I still remember very vividly as a little boy, every night at ten o’clock unlike to raunchy stuff we see on TV today, there would be a commercial that said ... it is ten o’clock do you know where your children are.
As a child, I often pondered how many parents really knew. Although I did not know the answer that -- there is one thing that I knew for sure -- Theodore and Gloria Parks knew where theirs was in the bed. In addition, for those parents who did not know ... I often wondered if they blamed themselves.
If I had been a better parent
•my son wouldn’t be addicted to alcohol
•My daughter would go to church more
•My kids would have made better choices
Some may even considered themselves as failures
•I tried to be the best parent that I could be. I did the best that I could but I guess my best was not good enough.
I got to thinking that the situations that we face today are not new. The dysfunctional family has been around since the beginning of time.
•Adam and Eve had a perfect home (a Family) until they decided to ignore the designer, the architect safety precautions and decided to do some DIY projects. Ignoring the safety instructions and warning that told them not to do so.
•Bad kids ... this is not new either. Cain and Abel. When one can kill another simply because of jealousy tell me that the family has problems
•Bad Parents: This issue is not new. Just ask Eli
•So I agree that this is simply a new twist on some old problems
STRENGTHENING THE FAMILY IN TODAY’S SOCIETY
I am a firm believer that the only solution for this monumental task is found right here in the Bible.
Proverbs 127:1
Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it:
You see ... before you can strengthen something or somebody you must first find out their weakness.
Now, you may not agree with me but I am of the persuasion that the weakness that is plaguing our family, which ultimately affects our society, begins in the home.
I am reminded here of the story about a cute little girl was sitting on top of a pile of luggage in a hotel. Her parents were at the desk registering for their room. A sympathetic woman asked the little girl if they were visiting relatives in the city. “Oh, no”, replied the girl. “We’re going to live at this hotel until we find a house. My daddy got a new job and we had to sell our old house and move.” The woman said, “Oh, it’s too bad you don’t have a home.” To which the girl replied, “We do have a home-it’s just we haven’t found a house to put it in yet.”
Perhaps, Dorothy from the Wizard of OZ was right when she said ... THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME.
Well, if you ever liver overseas, or if you are one that is required to travel a lot and live out of your suit case, I am sure that you would agree with Dorothy and me -- that there is no place like home. Dorothy would click her heels together three times together and say ... I WISH I WERE HOME (x3).
However, truth of the matter is home has become one of the least desired places to be.
•Husbands don’t want to be there
•Wives are being abused mentally and physically and don’t want to live there and
•Children who can’t have their way ... run away from there
Therefore, the question then becomes what happened
•What happened to Sunday dinner after Church at grand momma house?
•What happened to
•Kick ball, dodge ball, 1, 2, 3-10 red light, red rover, hop scotch, double-dutch, hide and go seek, marbles, and jacks.
•What happened (X3)
What happened to Family Commitment ... you know the assurance that this family will stay together, value each other, for a lifetime, no matter what (if you mess with one Stackhouse, you got to deal with all of the Stackhouse’s).
•Whatever happened to the time when we faced problems we faced them together / we faced challenges together.
•May be broke but we will be broke together
•May be hungry ... we will be hungry together
•Before we go out and steal ... we will eat ketchup sandwiches and syrup sandwiches together.
•Whatever happened to community ... you know when you cut up and Mr. Eddy would whoop you, then tell you grand daddy and he would whoop you too (I’m talking from experience).
Well, I am a firm believer that the answer can be summed up in 13 words:
Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it:
Except the LORD
•JEHOVAH, the existing ONE, the One true GOD
•Build (baw-naw)
•To build, rebuild, establish, cause to continue
•The house (the family)
•Except JEHOVAH GOD build, rebuild, establish, cause to continue ... all your efforts will be in vain.
This scripture reminds me of a popular show called Extreme Home Makeover.
Well, I am a form believer that this is actually, what is needed if we ever intend to strengthen our families in today’s society.
The scripture says:
Except the LORD builds the house (the family) they labor in vain that build it.
This applies to the “White House” to your house and my house ... no family is exempt.
Unfortunately, some families need some major construction...
Some houses could be considered major CONSTRUCTION AREA -- HARD HATS REQUIRED
Truth be told ... some homes (families) in our time tend to be war zones and disasters areas that require construction zones signs that say -- watch out for flying debris
•They tried legislation, education and still nothing seems to work. All around us, we see the results of the breakdown of the family.
Let see ... what is affecting our family
•Divorce
•Adultery
•Wife swapping (swinging)
•Disobedient children
•Duel working families
•Single parent families
•Grandparents raising grand kids
•Homosexuality
•Alternative life styles
•When our teenage girls decide to fight their a 60 year old teacher
•When someone drag races down a busy street, run over a man... and people stand by and do nothing.
•When a young man walks up to teacher, punches her in the face, then robs her in broad day light.
•Etc, etc, etc.
All of that tell me that the family is in trouble.
We need an extreme make over Christian edition. Oh yes, God has to be the architect of the family. He designed the blueprints and laid out (created) everything.
Home improvement (the family) will never occur apart from GOD. Truth of the matter is Home improvement begins with us improving our relationship with GOD.
I am convinced that relationships fail ... and we can trace this back to the beginning of time because we (humans) trust or accept someone else’s opinion rather than relay on God’s omniscience (all knowing).
He designed it all, knows it all, created it all ... and yet we would rather listen to a talking snake.
What are you saying ... well, simply put when it come to the family, stop trying to DIY (stop trying to do it yourself). Some things require professional attention. In fact, some things you have to send back to the manufacture.
In addition, when it comes to the house (the family) popular opinions and Oprah Winfrey cannot do anything for you.
There are hundreds of books on how to have a perfect marriage or how to raise your children ... yet none of them can help you if they are founded on Godly principals.
Truth of the matter is people who listen to popular opinion and Jerry Springer are foolish ... it is like building your house on the seashore and you wonder why the storm washed it away.
So it you want to know how to strengthen the family in today’s society ... begin by giving God your life, your marriage, and your children. You may not be able to change them but God can. Stop trying to do it yourself. Stop trying to do it in your own strength. Allow GOD to build your house (family)
I am telling you we need an extreme make over ... and in fact, I hear somebody knocking at the door.
Revelations 3:20 “Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hears my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him and he with Me.
So how do we strengthen the family in today’s society ... may I submit to you this morning that the answer is too let go and let God build your house (your family)
Whatever you need -- God the master builder, the designer, the creator, have got everything you need?
•STRENGTH. If it is strength you need -- all you have to do is stop DIY (trying to do it yourself) and allow Jehovah-Elohim to come in a repair your situation.
How do we strengthen the Family in Today’s Society...?
•DIRECTION. Well if it is direction that you need. Stop DIY (trying to do it yourself) and allow Jehovah-Rohi in to repair and regulate your mind.
How do we strengthen the Family in Today’s Society ... when we are feeling a little stressed out and lonely
Perhaps you should stop DIY (trying to do it yourself) and make an appointment with the Master Builder by the name of Jehovah-Shammah. You see the word on the street is that HE is a present help in the time of trouble.
How do we strengthen the Family in Today’s Society ... when you are sick and cannot get well?
My I recommend my physician to you this morning ... He goes by the name of Jehovah-Rapha. He is known around town as the Lord our Healer.
How do we strengthen the Family in Today’s Society ... when you are broke, and you do not have to dimes to rub together?
Perhaps you should stop DIY (trying to do it yourself) and call Jehovah-Jireh because the Lord will provide.
Want HE do it ... Yes He will (repeat)
I been young and I been old, but I never seen the righteous forsaken nor His seed begging for bread.
Want He make way out of no way
He will put food on your table
Clothes on your back
Want he do it ... Yes he well (repeat)
How do we strengthen the Family in Today’s Society ... Stop DIY (trying to do it yourself and allow God?
Except the LORD, build the house,
They labour in vain that build it: