Porn Sunday #1
© 2008 Eric Bain
NOTE: The following sermon is available in audio format at www.sanctuary-church.com
Well good morning and welcome to what we are calling Porn Sunday, here at Sanctuary! If you’re a first time visitor, maybe you’re new to Christianity, and you came because you saw one of our flyers that said… PORN! I don’t want to disappoint you… we’re not actually showing any porn here this morning – although that probably attract a large number of visitors… (act as if you’re thinking about it) No – we’re not going to do that! Nonetheless, the plan for this morning is to talk about pornography from a Christian… theological… perspective. Lord knows…
• I am not an expert on Pornography…
• And I’m not a counselor…
• I’m not a sociologist…
• But what I do know a lot about, is Christian Theology.
In other words, I’ve spent an awful lot of time studying, and learning, and thinking about what the Bible has to say about…
• God…
• About us…
• And what it means to be true, Follower of Christ.
So today, I’m going to talk about that… in regard to pornography & sexuality. And what that means, is that if you don’t have a Bible… you’re going to want to grab one. Because we’re going to be looking at several different passages.
In fact, you can open up to the book Matthew, Chapter 5, verse 5 (page ______ )
While your doing that, let me just answer one question that you may be wondering, and that’s this… Why we are having… a Porn Sunday?
• Well, the simple answer is… You guys have asked me to!
• Maybe not all of you, but what I want you to know, is that over the past 3 years – and especially in this last year – I’ve had numerous people – both men & women that have told me that pornography is a major issue in both their spiritual and relational lives.
• Which isn’t all that shocking when you consider that porn is a $57 Billion dollar industry.
o Many of you just got done watching the Super Bowl last Sunday. You know that companies spent huge amounts of money to air television commercials during the game. What may surprise, however, is to learn that Porn revenue is larger than the revenues of all professional football, baseball, and basketball franchises… COMBINED!
o Friends… Porn is huge!
Now, maybe you’re sitting there thinking… Yeah, but we’re Christians!
• We’re saved by Jesus!
• Our men are Promise… Keepers!
OK… but maybe it would surprise you to know that…
• Promise Keepers did a survey… and 53% of their men admitted to viewing porn… in the last week!
• And in one survey of Christians… 47% - nearly half – said that porn is a major problem in their home!
Friends, what that means, is that many of us in this room are suffering… and we’re suffering in silence. But the irony is… Jesus came to bring about an end to suffering. To bring about healing. So if that’s the case… what does our Christian Theology have to say about Porn?
• I think we really need to talk about this!
• I think we need to talk about it here… in church.
• And I think we really need to know what the Bible has to say about this issue.
And so that’s what we’re going to do.
So… what’s my ultimate hope in this? What do I hope to achieve today?
Well, my hope for you today, is nothing more than this… that through our conversation… and the power of the Holy Spirit… all of you will have a greater understanding of what the Christian faith as to say about Pornography.
But that’s not all… I’m also hoping that some of you… will experience the beginning… to the end of your suffering.
Let me say that again…
I hope that some of you…
Will experience the beginning… to the end of your suffering.
Now, that being said… I recognize that the beginning of a journey… is sometimes the most painful part!
• Truth is… some of you don’t even know… that you’re on this journey yet.
• And finding out… might rock your world.
Those of you that have already begun such journeys… know exactly what I’m talking about.
• So I want to ask you – If you’ve already begun such a journey – to be praying for the people sitting next to you.
But for now… let’s all PRAY!
Open your Bibles to the book of Matthew, Chapter 5, Verse 27 (page ______ )
MT 5:27 "You have heard that it was said, `Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
I bring you to this passage, to simply point this out… Pornography is a sin!
And before we go any further, I need to say… Let’s cut the crap… and be honest!
• Pornography is a sin!
• I know that there are some of you in this room that say, “I don’t see the big deal!”
o Which may indeed be true!
o However, if we’re Christians… then we need base our belief – not on our feelings… not on our emotions… not on our human understanding… but rather, on what God tells in his Word.
o And God’s word tells us that Pornography is a sin!
Now, let me say this…
• I do believe that it is possible to look at a naked person and appreciate what exists there… as somebody formed in the image of God… and truly appreciate that image for what it is. And to do such… is not a sin.
o But let’s be honest… that’s not the purpose behind Pornography!
o The purpose behind pornography is to look lustfully at an image.
• Oh… I just look at it to get excited.
• To then have great sex with my spouse!
o Cut the crap… You get excited because you look lustfully at someone else!
o Pornography is a sin!
• Until we get honest… We can’t have healing!
Jesus said…
MT 5:28 I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Something I need to point something out…
• Jesus isn’t saying that it’s only a sin for men to look at porn
• Rather, he’s simply addressing the majority in his audience
• NOTE: This gives me permission to speak in generalities!
And so, therefore, what he’s saying is this: To look at somebody… lustfully… sexually… that is not your spouse… is a sin!
Pornography is a sin… for both men and women. Both men and women struggle with it. In fact, let me just share a few more stats…
• The breakdown of male/female visitors to porn sites: 72% male - 28% female
• It’s estimated that 17% of all women struggle with a porn addiction.
o And I’m not saying they struggle with it in the sense that their husbands or boyfriends use it.
o They struggle with it in the sense that they… are addicted to it!
• Another interesting fact… Women, far more than men, are likely to act out their pornographic images in real life.
o In other words… while men are more likely to view porn and fantasize about it.
o Women are far more likely to actually do the things they see.
Bottom line…
• This is a humanity issue… not a man or woman issue!
• Porn is a sin.
• Porn is a problem from a Christian perspective!
Studies show… and I’m not talking about “Christian” research here…
• Pornography is highly addictive!
o It’s like a drug!
o Not everybody get’s addicted… but those that do, have a very difficult time breaking its grasp.
• In addition, pornography promotes the allure of adultery, prostitution and unreal expectations within marriage.
Friends, what you need to understand from a Christian Theological perspective… is that God tells us that porn is a sin because God wants us to have the best possible life! And porn doesn’t lead to that.
Now we’re going to talk about that. But first, I want to address the question: Why is the attraction to porn so powerful?
• Again… from a theological perspective… Why?
Flip in your bibles to the book of Genesis, Chapter 2, Verse 18 (page _____ )
What we have here is the 6th Day of Creation. And whether or not you believe in 6 literal days of creation is not important. But what is important, is that God has just finish making man… and then this takes place…
GE 2:18 The LORD God said, "It is not good… for the man to be alone.
Now, again, this is the 6th Day of Creation. And it’s important that you realize…
• Sin has not yet entered the creation!
• But nonetheless… something is not good!
o In other words… man, in God’s creation, needed something…
o He wasn’t complete…
o And what he needed... (this is so important to realize) wasn’t God!
Now that might rock your world if you think about it! It rocked mine the first time I thought about it.
• But, Man needed something… and it wasn’t God.
• It was something else…
• I mean, God was right there!
• Man was incomplete...
o He needed something…
o And without it… creation wasn’t good!
Verse 18…
GE 2:18 The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper… suitable for him."
And so, God goes on to make woman. And after he’s made this woman, he declares that his creation is now… very good! In other words…
• Man without woman is incomplete!
• But also, woman without man is incomplete!
Verse 24 says…
GE 2:24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked and they felt no shame.
Naked & unashamed! Man and women were created to be before one another… naked & unashamed! That’s where completeness was found.
In other words, completion comes when man & woman come together…
• In nakedness
• In sexuality
• In marriage…
…and without it… they’re not complete… and that’s not good!
(pause)
Now, think of this… I often hear Christian singles say to me, I’ve got my relationship with God… but I still don’t feel complete! I feel like I’m missing something…
• Now the funny thing is the church has had a nasty habit of telling such people…
o Well, what you’re missing is God…
o What you need… is to just draw closer to God!
But what we see from Genesis 2, is… No! That’s wrong!!! That’s the wrong answer!
You see, what we should be saying to such people is…
• You’re right!
• You not complete!!!
• That emptiness… that pull… that sense that you feel… is for something other than God…
• And get this… God designed that draw… that pull that you feel… it to be sexual!!!
Some of you are just thinking… Thank you!
You see, God designed both man and woman to only be complete… when they are in union. When they are together… naked & unashamed… sexually… in marriage!
Well, what does this have to do with Porn? Let me tell you… It would have nothing to do with Porn, except for the fact that in Genesis, Chapter 3 – the very next chapter – two significant things are introduced to the human story…
1. The Fall of humanity!
2. The introduction of Satan!
Now, what we’re going to do for the rest of our time this morning… is talk about why these two events are significant… especially in light of pornography.
First off, the fall of humanity.
When I say the fall of humanity, what I’m talking about is the introduction of sin into the human story. Remember, at the end of the 6th Day, things were very good!
• Man and woman were there… naked & unashamed
• They were powerfully attracted to one another…
• It was sexual in nature…
• And it was very good!
o Trust me… God wants you to have sex!!!!
o Sex is very good!
o It’s just that he wants you to have it… within the bounds of marriage.
o To find completeness…
So the 6th Day comes to an end. Everything is very good… but then sin entered God’s creation. And what we need to understand about the Fall – about the introduction of sin… is that when it occurred, creation wasn’t destroyed.
In other words, with the introduction of sin… man and women (made in God’s image) they weren’t destroyed. Rather, they were…
• Corrupted
• Twisted
• Distorted
• The image was… Blurred…
Or, think of it this way, man and woman were the same… only yet different… and different in a way that wasn’t good.
(pause)
So, think about this…
Man and women were created to be powerfully attracted to one another - literally, without the other… each is incomplete… Naked & Unashamed…
• But the intent… is that they would find that completeness in marriage.
• Something that from the very beginning… is sexual in nature.
But then you have the Fall… and everything is twisted.
• Man and woman are still incomplete without the other
• They still have this powerful, sexual draw to someone else
• But only now… all that is…
o Confused
o Twisted
o Distorted
You see, I don’t know if you’ve ever thought about it… but Adam and Eve’s initial response to sin in their lives is sexual in nature. If you know the story, what do they do?
• They cover their nakedness… in shame
• They cover their differences
• And in that… what they’re doing, is they’re each denying something from the other…
• And that something… is very significant to what makes the other complete
So, if you’re wondering why the desire for Porn is so strong…
• It’s because you were designed to see something… you no longer get to see - in the way that it was intended.
• And you were designed to have something… that you can no longer have truly have - in the way God designed it for you.
• Finally, you were created to get something… that’s now… just out of reach!
But here’s the thing…
o The drive is still there.
o And no matter how much you look… no matter how hard you try… no matter how much you get… you won’t fulfill the drive!
o Because the perfect completeness has been corrupted!
In addition…
• You were designed to meet a need… that you can no longer meet!
• You were created to be fulfilled… in a way you can no longer be fulfilled.
And here’s the kicker… no matter how hare you try… you won’t get what you truly long for!
You see, it’s a consequence… of the Fall. And it won’t be corrected until Christ comes again!
Now, I want to deviate for just a minute. Because what I have here is a teachable moment… and I don’t want to pass it up. (Expound on each of the below… take them slow!)
• Some of you are single… I have this huge sexual urge!
o Marriage won’t solve that.
• Some of you are sitting there thinking: You know… I’m happily married… I have a good sex life… but I still have that drive!
o Only now, hopefully you understand…
o It’s because of the Fall that you still feel this way.
o And that’s an issue that you’re going to have to deal with on your personal, spiritual journey!
• But others of you, are sitting there thinking: You know what Eric… I don’t have that kind of drive! In fact, not only do I not have that drive for others… but I don’t have it for my spouse!
o Well, that may be true… but my point is… you should!
o And it’s only as a result of the fall… that you don’t.
o But that’s an issue that you… are going to have to deal with on your personal, spiritual journey!
• And then finally, I recognize that some of you are sitting there thinking: You know, Eric… I have that drive… but it’s not for someone of the opposite sex!
o Well, let me be maybe the first pastor to tell you – You know what? Those feelings are real! And you may have been born that way!
o But what you need to understand… is that those feelings are also a result of the Fall.
o And that’s an issue that you’re going to have to deal with on your personal, spiritual journey!
Now, the reason I wanted to deviate on this for a minute… is that I want you to realize, that when it comes to the Fall – and the resulting sexual - sin struggles... we’re really all on a level playing field.
In other words, because of the Fall… we all struggle with sexual issues.
• And while those issues may manifest differently…
• The core thing that we’re all looking for… is really the same.
We desire completeness! Completeness that was found naked & unashamed… and in a sexual relationship.
You know, maybe I should say this… I so wish for Christians… that we would stop ranking one another’s people sin. And here’s why:
• When it comes down to it… we’re all sinful.
• We’re all seeking the same thing.
• And by pushing someone else down – so that I feel better… it doesn’t really help.
• In fact, it really only makes things worse.
Do you remember the point of last week’s message?
God really loves… all people!
And if as Christians we’re supposed to be Christ…
Then we need to love all people.
Alright, I mentioned that there were two significant things introduced in the 3rd Chapter of Genesis…
1. The Fall of humanity!
2. The introduction of Satan!
Now, I’ll tell you… I’m not a person that sees Satan behind every bush. But if we claim Scripture as our guide…
• Then Satan is as real as Jesus
• And in fact, more than that… Satan is the king of this present world.
And what we learn about Satan from the Bible…
• Is that Satan is a deceiver…
• He is a liar…
• He is a twister of the truth…
• And he is willing to do anything that will draw people away from God… and prevent them from having a personal relationship with the Lord.
In addition… for those that have such a relationship with God… for those that are Christ followers…
• Satan wants to mess it up!
• If God wants you to have the best possible life… then Satan wants you to be fooled into having something less.
• And he’s willing to do anything in his power… to make that happen.
Now, am I saying that Satan is behind the Porn industry…
• Maybe…
o It was Satan’s influence that tempted Eve to sin in the Garden.
• Maybe not!
o Remember, humans had this powerful attraction to the opposite sex… even before Satan got involved.
o So was Satan there when Larry Flint or Hugh Heffner realized that humans have these powerful urges that they could exploit to make money and gain power?
• Perhaps… but he didn’t need to be!
• Fallen humans would have figured that out on there own!
But consider this…
• When something is so destructive to God’s desires…
• When something is so powerfully skewed to the negative…
• You can bet that Satan’s fingerprints are all over it!
I guess what I’m trying to say is the… While every pornographic action may not involve Satan… it certainly is Satanic. (Remember, we can be Satan)
THEREFORE: This is a spiritual battle!
(pause)
So what do we do with this?
• Well, first off… we continue the dialogue.
Originally, my plan was to have Porn Sunday be just today. However, the more I got into what the Bible has to say about this… the more I realized we needed more time. So, next week… we’ll continue.
Today is just setting the ground work…
o Is porn a sin? YES!
o Why is the draw so powerful? We were created to be complete!
o And then next week will deal more specifically with, “What do we do about this problem.”
Cause let me tell you what’s really sad…
• Many men (and I’m speaking in generalities) will embark on that never ending quest – into porn. A quest to find something they’ll never find. And in the process, they’ll destroy their one chance at having the best possible life… with their spouse!
• While other men… They’ll give up on that quest… and they’ll allow themselves to be beaten into the belief that you just shouldn’t find sexual fulfillment… and so you slowly die. Never really knowing that God had something better for you.
On the other side of that coin…
• Some women buy into the belief… that if they just participate in this never ending quest… well, somehow that will end up being good. It never will be.
o You allow your spouse to view porn
o You maybe even participate in porn
• While other women… give up… they stop trying to be sexual… they stop trying to be beautiful… and when their men slowly die… they think they’re in a good place.
o But that is a lie from Satan!
o And God want’s you to be in a much better place!
Next week, we’re going to talk much more about… What do we do?
o In addition, we’ll have some input from a female perspective.
Jenny Unger – our Women’s Pastor of Spiritual Development will come up at the end of my message… and provide a response from a female perspective.
o So, that’s next week.
But for now… there’s a couple things I’d like us to do…
1. Have a number of deep conversations… with God!
• In other words, I want us to go to God… individually… in prayer… and really talk to him about this topic and what it has to do with me (individually).
o Spend some time in prayer
o Spend some time in meditation
o And reflect on ourselves… and our own fallen condition.
Then ask God… to lead you! To open your heart… to open your mind… to open your eyes!
Now, hear me - I understand that each situation is unique…
o But I’m not asking you to have a conversation with your spouse (in fact, that might be a bad idea).
o And I’m not asking you to have a conversation with your boyfriend or girlfriend…
o In fact, not even with your counselor.
We have a tendency to rush to a counselor… rather than The Counselor (HS).
Rather… I’m asking you to spend a week… in prayer… in conversation with God.
(Make them raise their HANDS – to demonstrate commitment!)
3. The second thing I’d like to do… is close with Communion...
And here’s why… Jesus died upon the cross not just to forgive me and you of our sins… but to liberate creation from the effects of the Fall.
You see, if we want to talk about the beginning to the end of the Journey… It really began 2000 years ago! And whilst it was a very painful day… you and I were spared from ever experiencing that pain… so long as we are followers of Christ!
© 2008 Eric Bain
