We are now more than half way through first month of 2008 and this is the third of a four part series, ‘Four Resolutions for 2008.’ Four chapters, all from the New Testament, are being studied for the purpose of making four important resolutions for this year: (Slide 1)
• Live Free in Christ
• Love One Another (which became Aim High)
• Live Well With Others, which we will examine today
• Find Your Place and Serve
What does it mean well to live with others? As I thought about this question, I came across the story from Pastor John Dobbs about a little boy.
According to Dobbs, he was ‘sitting on his front steps with his face cradled in his hands, looking so forlorn. His dad came home just then and asked him what was wrong. The little boy looked up and said, "Well, just between us, Dad, I’m having trouble getting along with your wife, too!"
John Maxwell tells the story of another kid, in fact two kids, on their way to school, talking about their families. Maxwell noted, ‘One boy said—“I’ve figured out a SYSTEM for getting along with my MOM…. It’s very simple--- She tells me what to do….AND I DO IT!!!’
Getting along with others is a constant challenge, isn’t? Not only do we have to get along at home, but we also have to get along with teachers and students at school, our next door neighbors in the neighborhood, our co-workers in the office or on the factory floor, other drivers on the road, and one another. And sometimes it is just plain difficult and frustrating. But at other times, and we have these moments as well, when we get along and life is good.
From the beginning of creation, as we read in Genesis, humankind has had to deal with getting along, first in the garden, and then as time has passed in this wider world we call earth. And because God created us with the capacity and the need for relationship with other humans, getting along is a very important resolution, all year long.
So, how can we get along? How should we get along? It is an important question! Better yet, how can we not just get along but live well with others?
Our text for this morning, the fourth chapter of the book of Ephesians, is a long chapter, I am going to read it one section at a time and as I do, we are going to study that section and look for ways to live well with others. We begin with verses 1 through 3.
‘Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Always keep yourselves united in the Holy Spirit, and bind yourselves together with peace.’
Recently I read a very moving story from the pen of John McCain, one of our current presidential candidates. It was one of many episodes from his days as a Prisoner of War during the Vietnam War. I quote him verbatim at this point:
‘As a POW, my captors would tie my arms behind my back and then loop the rope around my neck and ankles so that my head was pulled down between my knees. I was often left like that throughout the night.
One night a guard came into my cell. He put his finger to his lips signaling for me to be quiet, and then loosened my ropes to relieve my pain. The next morning, when his shift ended, the guard returned and retightened the ropes, never saying a word to me.
A month or so later, on Christmas Day, I was standing in the dirt courtyard when I saw that same guard approach me. He walked up and stood silently next to me, not looking or smiling at me.
After a few moments had passed, he rather nonchalantly used his sandaled foot to draw a cross in the dirt. We stood wordlessly looking at the cross, remembering the true light of Christmas, even in the darkness of a Vietnamese prison camp. After a minute or two, he rubbed it out and walked away.’ McCain went on to call him ‘my Good Samaritan.’
Prison life is not the best place to live as both McCain and Paul would acknowledge.
In the midst of what we call his ‘missionary journeys’ Paul often ended up in prison because his ministry and his proclamation of the gospel for reasons I have shared in the past two weeks, i.e. opposition from a wide range of groups. (I note, that he speaks of this in the previous chapter, chapter 3 in verse 1 when he says, ‘I, Paul, am a prisoner of Christ Jesus because of my preaching to you Gentiles’.) You can read about some of those experiences in the book of Acts.
When Paul wrote this particular letter (and that is what the New Testament books that bear his authorship originally were, letters to churches) he wrote it in prison at Rome several years after his time with the church in the town of Ephesus. It was a letter of encouragement to the Christian community both in Ephesus as well as the area around Ephesus. But even from a substantial distance Paul was concerned about the Ephesian Christians and their ability to live well with each other as a witness to their family, friends, enemies, and community.
Now verse 1 begins with ‘Therefore,’ another declarative kind of word in which Paul repeats what he had already stated in verse 1 of chapter three but also to make a new point. ‘Therefore’ also refers to what he has previously said to this group of believers about the wonderful power of God and especially His love, working in them at an ever deepening level as noted in 3:17 and 18, ‘And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.’
So, therefore, because of this great love it is Paul’s deep hope and passionate prayer that they will ‘lead a life worthy of their calling.’ How do they do that? How do they live well together?
(Slide 2) They will live well together by consciously cultivating a character of patience, humility, and gentleness through the power and work of the Holy Spirit.
Living well together as followers of Jesus requires a conscious and continuous partnership with the Holy Spirit for it is the Holy Spirit who has the ability to change our character. We can’t change our character, but we can cooperate with God who can change our character.
That little boy, who was sitting on the steps and complained to his dad about his wife, had lost some patience with his mother. Patience is a vital trait to have and if we are to live well together we need to have patience with one another. Let me suggest that patience is a great testimony to those who have yet to believe! It is probably one of the most ‘Christian’ characteristics we can have.
Now I know some of you are already thinking, ‘I have no patience! It is in short supply with me!’
I know, I know, and I understand. But I also believe that God can help us develop patience that allows to live well with others. And Paul suggests two ways this patience becomes operational in our lives and character.
The first way is to be humble and gentle. Humility is not a ‘woe is me’ attitude. It is an honest and caring estimation of one’s self. At times, and I speak from a recent personal experience, being humbled (not humiliated) can be painful. But in being humbled we recognize our limitations as well as our strengths.
Then there is gentleness. Now here is another challenge as well. Perhaps we have been raised in a harsh environment with loud voices. Maybe we have endured difficult and even life threatening situations in which gentleness was a distant daydream. Gentleness may be to you a ‘pie in the sky’ dream, something that others may have, but you know that you cannot be gentle for fear of being vulnerable and exposed. Such situations are difficult and hard and a simple, ‘just believe, honey,’ does not do the trick. This is where the powerful and transforming love of God comes in.
If we choose, and it must be a choice, to live well with others, then we must allow the love of God to enter our hearts and soul and change us. This is the work of the Holy Spirit and often takes time because our character transformation is a life time process with moments of important changes taking place now and then. As we do, humility and gentleness and patience with one another become a reality. Therefore we are better able to live well with others.
Perhaps the image of a foundation upon which we build the ability to live well with others is a suitable one to introduce at this point. One side is the foundation called character. The second side is found in the next segment of verses 4 through 8:
‘We are all one body, we have the same Spirit, and we have all been called to the same glorious future. There is only one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and there is only one God and Father, who is over us all and in us all and living through us all. However, he has given each one of us a special gift according to the generosity of Christ. That is why the Scriptures say, “When he ascended to the heights,
he led a crowd of captives and gave gifts to his people.”
Notice that it says “he ascended.” This means that Christ first came down to the lowly world in which we live. The same one who came down is the one who ascended higher than all the heavens, so that his rule might fill the entire universe.’
We live in an age of the personality cult and a recent TV interview with the author of an ‘unauthorized biography’ about a well known actor underlines this. The writer was questioned about the faith to which this actor subscribes. He simply noted that a key part of this religion, this faith is one that says, ‘we are all gods.’
In this new segment of Ephesians 4, we read and hear the word ‘one’ seven times. (Slide 3) Notice the highlighted words on the slide. (Don’t try and read that!)
Most of the references using ‘one’ refers not to us, but to God and that is something that is key in understanding this next foundation to help us live well with others.
(Slide 4) We live well together when we live together under God and follow His direction and purposes.
I think that it is very important that we recognize that Paul is writing to believers who are not of Jewish background. They are Gentiles. They come from what would be called pagan backgrounds.
Ephesus, located in what is now the nation of Turkey, was the home of a temple for the Greek goddess Artemis who was the goddess of the moon and the hunt. One source that I consulted indicated that her temple housed a bank that was considered a very safe bank to put your money in. Paul visited this church twice, once and initially on his second missionary journey and then for period of three years on his third and last missionary journey.
These people then are faced with a very non-Christian community. Temple worship, from which many, if not most of them were converted, was the place to be. The challenge then to their unity and their faith was strong.
But Paul reminds them there are not many ways to God but only one way to God. He again tells them there are not many gods only one God. He says that this God, who is over all of us, is one who did not sit in some lofty place, distant and unresponsive, but came down to deliver us who were (and are) captives in order to lead us back to the high place of God.
Now what does this have to do with living well with one another?
We live well together when we live under God and follow His direction and purposes!
Who is the head of the church? Not the pastor. The pastor has a very important role and a powerful role but he or she is not the head of the church. Not a certain person or group of people. We all have our place in ministry (more about that shortly and next week as well) but none of us in the head of the church. The Lord is the head of the church and He has made very, very clear what He expects of us, the church, through this book! So if we are going to live well with others, we must willfully choose to live under the guidance and direction of God.
(Slide 5) This brings us to another way we learn to live well together by discerning, accepting, and then using our gifts that God gives us to use which helps create and maintain unity.
We now turn to verses 11 through 16, ‘He is the one who gave these gifts to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ, until we come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.
Then we will no longer be like children, forever changing our minds about what we believe because someone has told us something different or because someone has cleverly lied to us and made the lie sound like the truth. Instead, we will hold to the truth in love, becoming more and more in every way like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. Under his direction, the whole body is fitted together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.’
I am where I am and I do what I do because it was God’s will to give me the gifts and the call to pastor this congregation. I know that I do not do it perfectly. I am still very human and I have made mistakes. But that does not let me off the hook for not obeying the Lord and equip you to do the work He has called you do so that we eventually will ‘come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.’
Living well together comes as we discover, accept, and use the gifts that God gives to each of us. We all need one another. We all have a place that God has called us to serve. Think about that! God has a place He wants you to serve in the church! Are you spiritually ready for that place of service? Are you mentally and emotionally ready for that place of service?
Yes we have the Holy Spirit to give us the ability to serve the Lord with our gifts. But we also have the responsibility to serve. To paraphrase the credit card commercial, ‘membership does have its privileges.’ But membership also has its responsibilities!
But what is important here as we discern how this giftedness helps us live well together is in the purpose, the reason, the goal of our giftedness: Unity and Maturity.
Again let me read verses 12 and 13, ‘Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ, until we come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.’
Coming together in Christ and growing deeper and more complete in our faith in Christ, is how we live well together. Why? Because when a church comes together, in the spirit of unity and love, and makes a conscious choice to become responsible and maturing followers of Jesus, life together becomes a reality. A healthy church is the result.
The ministry of the church is not for a select few but for all who have made the commitment to Christ necessary for such involvement to take place. But the purpose of such commitment is not self-gratification but commitment and service that draws us closure together and closer to God.
(Slide 6) Finally we live well together when we make the choice to live in God honoring ways.
Here are verses 17 through 31:
‘With the Lord’s authority let me say this: Live no longer as the ungodly do, for they are hopelessly confused. Their closed minds are full of darkness; they are far away from the life of God because they have shut their minds and hardened their hearts against him. They don’t care anymore about right and wrong, and they have given themselves over to immoral ways. Their lives are filled with all kinds of impurity and greed.
But that isn’t what you were taught when you learned about Christ. Since you have heard all about him and have learned the truth that is in Jesus, throw off your old evil nature and your former way of life, which is rotten through and through, full of lust and deception. Instead, there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes. You must display a new nature because you are a new person, created in God’s likeness—righteous, holy, and true.
So put away all falsehood and “tell your neighbor the truth” because we belong to each other. And “don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil.
If you are a thief, stop stealing. Begin using your hands for honest work, and then give generously to others in need. Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.
And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he is the one who has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.’
We have heard these sentiments in the past several weeks from our other chapter studies and there is much more in this passage that is beyond our time and scope this morning. But as it relates to our theme of living well together there are two key statements in this passage that directly impact on living well together.
(Slide 7a) ‘there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes’
If we are going to live well together with both believers and unbelievers, then we have to, quoting Paul in Romans 12:2, ‘let God change the way you think.’ A conversion experience is much like wedding vows. They indicate the start of a new relationship.
When we are saved or ‘born again’ our relationship with the Lord changes from one of alienation and hostility to one of reconciliation and love. But it is only the beginning of the relationship, as we have discovered from our marriage experience.
The Lord, clearly from this passage, indicates that to live well with others we must have a renewal from time to time in our relationship with the Lord in our thoughts and attitudes because our thoughts and attitudes affect our relationships with not just our spouses and children but with one another and really, with everybody else that we have daily contact with. The verses which follow this statement are important and strategic ways that a renewal takes places.
The second key statement is a very pointed one and we find it in verse 30:
(Slide 8) ‘do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live.’ In short, what Paul says, is to live obediently. We may not realize it, but when we live disobediently to God’s plan, it affects the rest of us. It may never be apparent or blatant but it affects us.
When we live grieve the Holy Spirit by our disobedience, we loose God’s power in our lives. A wall goes up in our hearts and minds and we isolate ourselves from our Lord and Savior.
We also begin to isolate ourselves from one another. Our attendance, our giving, our ministry involvement, our contact with one another, begins to change and we loose the joy and peace of our faith and salvation. Is this what the Lord wants?
The image that comes to my mind of this dynamic is a historical one that we have seen many times from TV programs and the movies. I see a US Bomber over Germany in World War 2 in my mind hit and loosing speed and altitude. It is begins to fall out of formation. It soon is alone and will be pounced on by the enemy.
Another image comes to mind from nature. The lions are on the hunt for food and they go after a herd of wildebeests. They isolate one and once they do, they attack the lone animal.
The same thing happens to us when we grieve the Lord by the way we live and we fall out of formation, isolated, wounded, and on the defensive. Satan, like a roaring lion, comes after us.
You have known and I have known people of great faith who suddenly walked away from it all. It leaves us scratching our heads and it has wounded us as well.
We have covered a lot of territory this morning and I hope that I have not lost you a long the way. As I conclude, I bring us back to the opening of our chapter because it contains a phrase that I want us to think about this morning as a way of letting the Holy Spirit speak to us and help us resolve to live well together (Slide 9): lead a life worthy of your calling.
Do you want to live well together? Do we want to live well together?
What is the Lord saying to you this morning? Are you living your life well for Him?
Are you living your life well for Him…
In your family?
In your work?
In your finances?
In your relationships?
In your secret habits?
In your entertainment?
In your attitudes?
God has done so much for us, hasn’t he? He wants us to live a worthy life for Him as well as through Him, are you? Are we?
Be open to the Spirit this morning? Obey Him! The altar is open. Amen.
Power Points for this sermon are available by e-mailing me at pastorjim46755@yahoo.com and asking for ‘01208slides’ Please note that all slides for a particular presentation may not be available.
