After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks and insane regulations at the Department of Motor Vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son. I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register. "Cash or charge?" the clerk asked. "Cash," I snapped. Then apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, "I’ve spent the afternoon at the motor vehicle bureau." "Shall I gift-wrap the bat?" the clerk asked sweetly. "Or are you going back there?" submitted by Glenn Vaughan
We can do some crazy things when we• allow our anger to take hold of us.
Have you done things while you were• angry that you wish you could take back?
Anger can be one of the most• destructive things in our life.
Matthew 5:21-26
When Jesus said, “But I tell you,” He was not doing away with the law or adding His own beliefs. Rather, He was giving us a fuller understanding of why God made the law in the first place.
For example, Moses said, “You shall not murder” (Exodus 20:13); The Pharisees read this law and, not having literally murdered anyone, felt righteous. But Jesus knows what’s in their heart. They were so angry with Jesus that they would plot His death, though they would not do the dirty work themselves.
Anger is a dangerous emotion that always threatens to leap out of control, leading to violence, emotional hurt, increased mental stress, and spiritual damage.
I. Forgiveness and Reconciliation start in our heart.
The bible says, “As a person thinks in his/her heart so they become."
In verses 21-22 Jesus brings in a higher ethical law. The law of the heart comes from God.
Jesus is saying: “Be careful what you say it reveals the condition of your heart.” You may have never murdered anyone, but what about the motives of your heart. Jesus is saying, “What matters is not merely the letter of the law but the spirit.” The law says, “You shall not commit murder.” Jesus says, “If you are angry in your heart with a brother you are guilty under God’s law of murder. To hate, to feel bitter, to have this unpleasant, unkind feeling of resentment toward a person without a cause is murder.
To say, Raca which literally means “empty head” or you are a worthless person. You are good for nothing. God will not tolerate character assignation. Words can destroy a person’s reputation or shake somebody else’s confidence in the person by unjust criticism. We are to love the person and get angry against the sin.
We are called to be positive not negative toward other people. There are some people who have the view: “If you can’t say something bad about someone then keep quiet and just look mad.”
James 1:19-20 “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.”
Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 19:11 “A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.”
What is it that causes us to get angry? We feel that we have our rights and no one had better take away our rights. If someone gets in my space they’re in trouble. I have my rights.
One of the first ways to deal with anger is to surrender our rights to God. Let me tell you that this is hard.
I was talking with Keegan the other day on a memory verse he should memorize… Gal 2:20
There are several ways you can deal with anger. You can suppress it. Don’t admit that you are angry. Hide your anger. It is hard for some people to hid their anger when their face turns beat red. Suppressed anger is hazardous to your health. Suppressed anger is like an abscessed tooth. You can take painkiller but the pain just comes back.
You can spiritualize your anger and say you are only righteously indignant. My anger is spiritual and yours is not.
Or you can be proud of your anger. “This is the way God made me, and I can’t help it. If you push me too far I’ll explode.
Children learn early how to use anger to get their way. Imagine the parents of a two-year old deciding to go out together for dinner on a Saturday night as a way to have some time together. Everything is all set. The baby-sitter comes over and as the parents are getting ready to go out the door the two-year old runs at the baby sitter kicking and screaming. Then he turns to the mother and cries in his most convincing voice as he hugs her around the legs, crying, “Don’t leave me! Don’t leave me! I love you. Don’t leave me.”
The softhearted mother says to her husband, “He just loves us so much. It hurts me to leave him. Why don’t you take the baby-sitter back home, I’ll fix us something here at home? We can go out another time.” What are the chances that child will grow up thinking that anger is a pretty good way to get your needs met? The child as he grows whether 12, 22 or 52 knows how to manipulate with anger.
So, what do you do with anger? Be sure you are getting angry at the right things. Jesus is our model in dealing with the emotion of anger. Jesus knew what it was like to be the subject of anger. Anger nailed Jesus to the cross.
The Apostle Paul gave sound teaching in Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry and do not sin.” He didn’t say, “don’t get angry.” He said, “do not sin.’ Do not get angry for the wrong reasons or wrong causes.
II. Forgiveness is an Act of Worship.
In Matthew 5:23-24, Jesus teaches that forgiveness is an act of worship. Forgiveness in fact is a gift that allows you to worship more fully. In fact before you can adequately worship God you need to ask for those you have wronged to forgive you.
Please don’t think when I say worship I mean what goes on here on Sunday’s. We worship God everyday. In how we treat others, what we says, what we think worship is not a meeting it is a lifestyle.
Why do prayers go unanswered? Why does God seem so far and distant? Because we have not make things right with people we have wronged. Before you worship, first be reconciled.
A bitter heart separates a person from God as well as the person your offended at. I asked a man one time if he had the assurance of eternal life. He told me that his brother was a Christian and, “I don’t want to go to heaven, if my brother will be there.” He did something to me that I will never forget or forgive. He cheated me out of some money. He is a Christian, but I would rather go to hell than forgive my brother for what he did to me.”
In the Lord’s prayer in Matthew 6:12, we pray: “Jesus forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” To refuse to forgive others forfeits our rights to be forgiven. We need to remember that our debt to God is beyond our ability to ever repay and yet he forgives us.
Ephesians 4:31-32 God’s Word says: “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice; and be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.” Forgiving and being forgiven are cut out of the same cloth. They cannot be separated.
George Herbert has written: “He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven, for everyone has need to be forgiven.”
How do we forgive? Not in our own strength. Forgiveness is only possible through a cross. Forgiveness is simply accepting what Jesus has already accomplished for us on the cross.
I John 1:9 is a powerful verse: ”If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” Forgiveness cancels the effects of sin.
III. Forgiveness and Reconciliation Bring Healing to Revenge and Resentment.
Jesus said, “First be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your gift.” “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
When we fail to forgive others who have hurt us we give in to the spirit of revenge and resentment. The spirit of revenge mushrooms like a cloud of deadly chlorine gas. Resentment is like concrete the longer it sets, the stronger its unwillingness to forgive becomes.
When I was working with the youth at Clarence Christian Church, I took the kids to CIY in Tennessee. In one of the main sessions I heard this illustration and it became big with-in the youth group.
A little boy visiting his grandparents was given his first slingshot. He practiced in the woods, but he could never hit his target.
As he came back to Grandma’s back yard, he spied her pet duck. On an impulse he took aim and let fly. The stone hit, and the duck fell dead.
The boy panicked. Desperately he hid the dead duck in the woodpile, only to look up and see his sister watching. Sall had seen it all, but she said nothing.
After lunch that day, Grandma said, “Sally, let’s wash the dishes.” But Sally said, “Johnny told me he wanted to help in the kitchen today. Didn’t you, Johnny?” And she whispered to him, “Remember the duck!” So Johnny did the dishes.
Later Grandpa asked if the children wanted to go fishing. Grandma said, “I’m sorry, but I need Sally to help make supper.” Sally smiled and said, “That’s all taken care of. Johnny wants to do it.” Again she whispered, “Remember the duck.” Johnny stayed while Sally went fishing.
After several days of Johnny doing both his chores and Sally’s finally he could stand it no longer. He confessed to Grandma that he had killed the duck.
“I know Johnny,” she said, giving him a hug. “I was standing at the window and saw the whole thing. Because I love you. I forgave you. I wondered how long you would let Sally make a slave of you.”
Jesus is saying that when we insist on getting even we bring ourselves down to the level of the one who hurt us and below his level. In getting even we bring more hurt on ourselves. It’s like seeking revenge by shooting yourself with a shotgun in order to hit your enemy with the kick of the gun’s recoil.
In his book, Lee: the Last Years, Charles Flood reports that after the Civil War, Robert E. Lee visited a Kentucky lady who took him to the remains of a grand old tree in front of her house. There she bitterly cried that its limbs and trunk had been destroyed by Federal Artillery fire. She looked to Lee for a word condemning the North or at least sympathizing with her loss.
After a brief silence, Lee said, “Cut it down, my dear Madam, and forget it.” It is better to forgive the injustices of the past than to allow them to remain, let bitterness take root, and poison the rest of our life. Cut the tree down forget the duck.
The cure for revenge and resentment is forgiveness. Forgiveness for the Christian is not an option. We are commanded to forgive.
Colossians 3:13-14 “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Jesus is our model for forgiveness. Get in your mind Jesus hanging on the cross. Jesus didn’t deserve to hang on the cross. He lived a perfect life. He helped people. He healed people all of his life. He loved the least and the lost. In return for all his love and good deeds he was spat upon, ridiculed, whipped, and crucified. Yet as he hung upon the cross in suffering pain and agony Jesus prayed, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do.”
This is the most important part of the whole sermon. It is realizing that you have sinned against God. No one in here is perfect. Rom 3:23. We need to go to God to get His forgiveness. “If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled, then come and offer you gift.”
If you are here this morning and you haven’t ever come forward repented of your sins and gotten baptized then leave your seat first come and repent and then get baptized for the forgiveness of your sins and the gift of the Holy Spirit.
