MEMORY VERSE: John 13:34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”
QUOTE: Billy Graham was asked what he would do if he had a son who was gay and he said, “I would love him all the more”.
We see clearly in our memory verse for today how we should love people…
We also see in 1 John 4 where love comes from… and it tells us how our relationship is affected if we DO NOT LOVE.
1 John 4:7-9 “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. …..”
Q: How has God loved us?
A: Unconditionally! There are no conditions on His love… well you must be nice, then I’ll love you, you must be heterosexual, then I’ll love you… no… God is LOVE!
Equal Salvation Opportunity (ESO)
Olathe Life Fellowship is an equal opportunity church that exists to offer the hope of salvation to all persons seeking truth, without regard to race, color, gender, religion, age, sexual orientation, national or ethnic origin, disability, marital status, veteran status, or any other spiritually irrelevant criteria.
INTRODUCTION: First I must address a question that I was asked after I announced the title to this message that actually would have been funny if it wasn’t so sad really… someone said, “We’re not going to be a gay church are we?”
I am sorry I am not even sure what a “gay church” is actually, or how to become one? I mentioned this to some of my gay friends when I interviewed them for this message and they laughed and said, and I quote: “I sure hope not – gay churches are a little weird!”
And let me be clear here and say that this sermon is not a political sermon! The only agenda I have is to help foster in our community an unconditional love for all people.
We are a community of Christ followers, full of all kinds of people - period! We are a people-church; we are ultimately a Jesus Church!
We are a church for humans beings… straight, gay, red, yellow, black white, poor, rich, tall, short, thin, heavyset, blonde, brunette, … shoot my sister’s hair was pink a few weeks back... We do not care who you are or what you look like – you are welcome here!
I am sure no one in this room would be ignorant enough to say God only loves heterosexual, republican voting, speed limit abiding, suit wearing, American brand buying, non-drinkers!
Can I hear an amen or an oh-me somebody? (laugh)
This talk is about God’s Love for everyone… and to remind us that we have not been given the job of judge! That’s God’s job!
If you came here today to hear me bash Homosexuals for 30 minutes you will be disappointed in today’s talk!
If you came here today to hear me encourage, or promote the homosexual lifestyle you will also be disappointed!
Because I truly believe some of you want me to either say “Homosexuality is a sin or that Homosexuality not a sin” to only validate your own opinion on the subject that matches your religious upbringing … basically to justify what you already believe/ or were taught or think you know.
I would guess that very few of you have no opinion on the subject.
I think it is a true sign of maturity when people can be together and yet have differences… and still be friends!
Unity not conformity!
Any church that feels everyone must believe the same thing is a CULT, in my opinion! Any church that feels “they alone have the TRUTH” is in serious error as well.
Even after 100 hours of study I do not have all the answers today on the subject of homosexuality… I definitely do not have all the answers on the subject of love either… I am still trying to “love my enemies” as Jesus has commanded us to do!
So, again I did not come here today to spend a lot of time on the subject of homosexuality itself… rather I want to challenge us all to be people of love!
But I will say this… listen with both ears and listen to the whole message in context and I think you will be blessed and challenged and you will grow in your relationship with Christ.
What upsets me about the Christian community for the most part is that we obtusely elevate Homosexuality as a sin greater then others… forgetting to mention that so is greed, envy, gluttony, heterosexual lust, hate, adultery (which Jesus said we commit when lusting after someone we are not married to, this would include looking at pornography)…
I think in our religious pride we forget WE ARE ALL SINNERS…. Here are more sins we are all guilty of; judging others, un-forgiveness, lying, cheating, gossip (of course this one we in the Christian world call “sharing our prayer concerns” to mask our evil intent… I think that the sin of gossip is the most evil and hurtful and deadly of sins a person commits – its murder with the mouth! And that one is one of the 10 commandments) Along with that one is…SLANDER…
slander, which in Greek is diabolos which is to find fault in the conduct of others… accusers (the devil is an “accuser of the brethren” the bible says – so those who slander are just like their father the devil)... have you ever met a fault finder – oh, such joy! (laugh) They are vocal critics!
I am attempting to put all sins on an even playing field... let me continue here…
Then we’ve got idolatry which we conveniently forget to mention is a sin because it’s when we put anyone or anything ahead of our relationship with God – like career advancement, relationships, hobbies, fears, entertainment, pleasure, sleep, money, ourselves, and on and on it goes… the list of “sins” we all struggle with.
Come on now, don’t shout me down cause I am preaching good!
When I was a kid the preacher used to say that… (laugh)
Again, I want to make it ever so clear WE ARE ALL SINNERS.
I am reminded of the great story I told on Easter… Before Jesus is thrown a women caught in the very act of adultery… the Pharisees (religious people of Jesus day) had their rocks in hand ready to stone her for her sin… then Jesus makes a profound statement…
(Say loud) “Ye without sin cast the first stone” (pause for a good bit)…(pick up the rock)
And what do we do? (Throw the rock!)
We have way too many ROCK-THROWING Christians… there are actually “ministries” that specialize in that!
In other words Jesus was saying, “hey you standing here pointing your finger at this women for the sin she has been found guilty of… if you are perfect and without fault – go ahead and stone her to death…”
The story goes on to say that each dropped their stone from the eldest to the youngest and each walked away… each of them being guilty of sin.
So all that said, let me clear here, I have no problem with labeling the act of homosexuality as sin, as long as you treat homosexuality like other sins and treat homosexuals the same as you treat all your other sinner friends - who are guilty of pride, envy, lust and those who gossip and slander.
Let’s just get it out there this morning “We all want to think our toots don’t stink.”
We think, “Well their homosexuality is worse than my envy”… wrong!
Roughly 96% of those in this room are heterosexual, which means that there are approximately 20 people who are homosexual or struggle with homosexual desires here right now.
And most all of us here today know someone who is gay – a family member, a close friend, a classmate, or a co-worker.
I think where the rub is that we who are heterosexual don’t understand the homosexual or the homosexual desire or struggle. I know I was homophobic for years, and even cracked jokes about homosexuals, and laughed at others when they told homosexual jokes. Now of course I am ashamed and regret my lack of love and compassion I expressed then.
To be just bluntly honest this morning, I didn’t understand it, having never had a homosexual desire, and though I knew a few homosexuals it was such taboo in the church, so everyone was hush hush about it… “Staying in the closet” so to speak… for fear of rejection.
When I started preparing for this message and had the wonderful opportunity to interview several homosexuals and hear their stories, their struggle, their fears, their heart, the rejection, the pain, the hurt, the loneliness – wow, my eyes were opened and I have a much better understanding and perspective on the subject now.
Just imagine if 97% of society was homosexual and you a heterosexual were ostracized and looked down on for having feelings for someone of the opposite sex, when you never asked to be this way?
Jesus said…
TEXT: Matthew 7:2-4 “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, Let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?”
ILLUSTRATION: Log sticking out of eye!
I’ve often wondered why I’ve never seen anyone on a street corner holding a sign that reads, “God Hates Gossipers”…
HOLD UP SIGN:
WHY is that?
That seems hypocritical to me really.
With Homosexuality comes a person, with a heart and soul, who should feel loved and accepted by us who call our selves “Christian”.
Here is what the Bible does say about homosexuality:
There are 12 mentions of homosexuality in the Bible:
• 2 refer to rape
Genesis 19:5
Judges 19:22
• 5 refer to cult prostitution
Deuteronomy 23:17-18
1 Kings 14:23-24, 15:12-13, 22:46,
2 Kings 23:6-8
• 1 refers to prostitution and pederasty (adult male, with male child, sodomy)
1 Corinthians 6:9-10
• 4 are nonspecific
Leviticus 18:21-22
Leviticus 20:13
Romans 1:26-27
1 Timothy 1:8-10
INTERESTING:
We must also note that Homosexuality is not mentioned in the Ten Commandments.
Jesus never directly addresses the subject of homosexuality.
In comparison:
1) The sin of hatred is mentioned 21 times.
2) Lying and false testimony 30 times.
3) Greed and covetousness 40 times.
4) Theft 42 times.
5) Adultery 52 times.
6) Murder 57 times.
7) Self-righteousness 79 times.
8) Idolatry 169 times.
Homosexuality varies from person to person – and what I mean is this… for some of you here like me who are heterosexual and have always been, it is not an issue or a struggle for you – many of you have never had an attraction to the same sex, but you know someone who does.
Then there are those of you who daily struggle with those feelings, you fight it, it’s a secret struggle for which you have never told anyone for fear of rejection or condemnation. It’s like you live 2 lives. You just know that if you were to tell your “Christian” friends about your struggle or your desires they would reject you. Your parents don’t even know! And for some of you your wife doesn’t even know about your struggle.
Can I just say that if your friends did reject you they weren’t worth having as friends... and definitely if the church rejects you – run, and run fast – that’s a bad church that is not worth attending! Or they are just scared of it like I used to be!
I would even recommend you tell them just to see if they are the real deal! And then get some real friends who will love and accept you!
SETH’S STORY: a friend of mine back in Bible school in 1991 (16 years ago now) was struggling with his sexuality… feelings he could not explain, and for the most part buried deeply, hoping they would just go away.
What was so interesting to me was that he mentioned having always had these feelings as far back as he could remember… he mentioned how confusing they were. And I remember growing up with him – we attended the same church from the time I was nine… he wasn’t interested in the same stuff all of us “other guys” were interested in… when we played sports he typically sat on the side lines, I remember him taking sowing classes, etc. Something was just different. This was back in the early 80’s.
Let me clarify here… I am just telling his story… I am not trying to stereotype the homosexual... everyone is different.
I think many times we have mistakenly assumed that homosexuals were probably abused as a child and that is what caused their sexual confusion; at least that is what I had ignorantly thought for years.
Well not in my friends case. He was raised in a good Christian home, he and his family attended the same church me and my family attended. His dad was an Elder, his mom was the organist. A perfect little Christian home.
He later went to Bible College… while in Bible College my friend continued to struggle with his sexuality - he prayed and cried that God would take this “thing” called homosexuality away, and at the time he wasn’t even sure what it was… he went to intense counseling to “get rid of his gayness” as he put it, to “set him free from being gay”. And his parents still pray nightly for his homosexuality to just go away. He was also sent to a major ministry called Exodus to “help” him “recover”.
Long story short while in Bible school he shared with a prayer group that he needed prayer for his struggles and when they heard what his “struggle” was they totally shunned him, acting as though they never knew him. What is crazy is he was a virgin, had never been with a man or a woman but was just having these internal struggles, and they pushed himout. How sad is that? END
So, to all my homosexual friends listening today – I am so sorry that you have been so rejected by us heterosexual Christians who think we are so perfect, when we are so far from it!
But to me those scenarios are not what I want to talk to or about…at least not in any depth this morning.
I also want to throw out there that if you are here and do “struggle” with these issues please feel free to set up an appointment with our office and we’d love to serve you however we can to help you sort it all out. We would love to help you reconcile the issues you may have regarding your own sexuality… and pursuing God’s will and plan for your life.
Here are some questions to think about:
Q: How should we treat people who are different from us?
Q: How should we treat people who are not doing what we feel is right?
Q: How should we treat people who are living a life we do not understand because we have never struggled with it or had those feelings?
Q: How would Jesus treat a homosexual?
Here is a question for the homosexual here today:
Q: Why would you give up on God just because of an ignorant Christian’s judgmental attitude?
Definitely things for us to think about!
In the famous bible verse…
John 3:16 “for God so LOVED the world…”
The word world which is the word kosmos translates into the human race, or all mankind, all of earth and it’s inhabitants.
It is clear that God loves all of earth’s inhabitants, every living creature!
This is why Jesus summed up the entire law with 2 commandments; love God, and love others as your-self… I say three because I break the last one in two…love God, love others, and love your-self.
Also in…
Galatians 5:14 “…serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: Love your neighbor as yourself.”
1 Corinthians 13:13 “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
Also we see that LOVE is the only way the world will recognize we have Jesus...
John 13:35 “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
It’s no wonder why people outside these walls doubt our “Christianity” … and think we are a bunch of haters!
Where’s the love?
Sadly, we prove to the world by our lack of love that we are not truly representing Jesus!
Let me do my best to answer a few questions you may have:
Q: Are you born gay?
A: I think that is a difficult question to answer really.
I would assume there are some of you here today, who do not struggle at all with your homosexuality; you are living the way you feel God has made you to live – “homosexual”.
And I honestly do not know what to say to that… for I was born heterosexual and never have had to deal with feelings other than feelings towards the opposite sex. And I have been able to pursue my heterosexual desires and be fulfilled in them - guilt free, with no hassle from the Christian community… even when I was in college and struggled with the sin of heterosexual lust… wanting women for much more than meaningful conversation – it was all good! My guy friends all understood me and my “normal” struggle. How hypocritical is that!
I’ve read the research and as of yet there is no definitive proof that there is a gay-gene link.
Now, I do not say that to say that you aren’t “born gay”. The answer is I, like the greatest scientists of the world do not know.
My personal opinion here… (which means you can agree or disagree I don’t care, and it means I may change my mind at some time – I am not necessarily speaking for God – just Timmy’s opinion)
I do think you can be born homosexual.
I mean, I didn’t choose to be heterosexual, I was born heterosexual, and it wasn’t a choice. And from the homosexuals I interviewed both said, I would never have chosen this life for myself! A life of constant rejection from family and friends! I will read an email from a gay man who says just that in a minute.
Where the choice came in is how I chose to live out my heterosexuality!
This is the whole Nature VS Nurture debate. I honestly don’t have a problem with either one… whether it is nature or nurture, only God knows, I guess… I think some situations are nurture, and others are nature.
I personally think it’s silly for one to criticize the other because every situation and person is unique.
Proverbs 18:13 “Spouting off before listening to the facts is both shameful and foolish.”
And remember last week we gave the Greek meaning for the word foolish… it means to be a moron!
Q: What is God’s plan for human sexuality? Or what was God’s intention?
A: I can only go from the model I see promoted in the bible.
Genesis 1:27 “So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female he created them.”
The Bible says that Adam was created first and Eve was formed from Adam’s rib.
Genesis 2:18 “The Lord God said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Then the bible says that God formed all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air and brought them to Adam to name. But from the animals that God created the bible says that, “but for Adam no suitable helper was found.”
Genesis 2:24 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they shall be one flesh.”
I can only find this “one flesh” concept in the Bible referring to Man and Women.
And in the New Testament here is what Jesus said in reference to human sexuality that I feel is extremely significant…
Matthew 19:4-6 “Haven’t you read, that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female, and said, for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
AN EMAIL FROM A HOMOSEXUAL CHRISTIAN:
Dear Pastor,
I have learned in the study of God’s Word and the subject of homosexuality. I do not claim that God’s intention was Adam and Steve, rather I acknowledge God made man Male and Female...both, together, separately, distinctively, or even in the oneness of marriage to mirror the image of God and His likeness. There is much to be said in regards to this subject, and I will not claim that I have all the answers for I do not. I will state this much, that...
1. We are saved by grace through faith; it is the gift of God.
2. Salvation is for “whosoever”, and homosexuals are ’whosoevers’ as well as the rest of humanity.
3. The system of Mosaic Law which is often called upon to prove that God hates homosexuality and calls it an abomination is the same system that Christ has fulfilled, and that if we today were judged by that system none of us could ever hope to be saved. Many things done by Christians today are directly forbidden in the law and would have us ostracized from the commonwealth of Israel.
Real quick let me just reference what he is referring too:
Leviticus 18:22 “Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.” (Or an “abomination”)
Leviticus 20:9 “If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death.”
Kid’s watch out!
Not that kids should disrespect their parents and get away with it… but to kill them is a little harsh, don’t you think?
Okay, back to the email… Rick goes on to say…
I claim that the law was a schoolmaster, a tutor, one to lead us to the free gift of God, for us to see our inability to ever earn or keep the gift that God so freely gives to those who call on the name of the Lord.
Many homosexuals live in fear of being found out, fear being exposed to ridicule and humiliation. No homosexual (that I know of) has ever "chosen" to be what they are......my God...why would we wish for the opposition and the rejection that is so often offered and given? Certainly not because we’re starving for attention....God forbid! - Rick
But I must be fair here and also say that God’s “model” for sexuality or marriage is also for monogamy and that marriage between a man and a women should last til death do you part – meaning no divorce.
In other words, there are many things in this life that are not “God’s ideal” or the way He would have hoped or wished it would be.
According to the Bible there are 2 ways out of a marriage – death, and marital unfaithfulness (and for many marital unfaithfulness would lead to death, cause she’d kill you) – meaning if your spouse commits adultery you have biblical grounds for a divorce… that does not include “irreconcilable differences” or “we grew a part”.
Listen, I am not preaching to you who have been divorced that you are in sin, trust me, I am only trying to make a point and stir you up a bit and to point out that we “Christians” sometimes forget about the PEOPLE associated with the TOPIC at hand when we condemn, judge or bash it.
I think everyone here would agree that DIVORCE is not God’s ideal, or His plan for anyone… but it still happens… the real question I think is how do we respond to people who are homosexual?
I say, we love! Because not a one of us here today are living God’s ideal!
Christians have absolutely no excuse to not love and accept homosexuals.
Remember I said weeks ago that GOD IS FOR PEOPLE, and that PEOPLE are more important the any RULE… and really the rule we as Christians should live by is LOVE.
Q: Can you be a Christian and gay?
A: Yes! Of course!
JOKE: I think there will be 3 surprises in heaven:
1) Who IS there.
2) Who is NOT there.
3) And the fact that you’re there.
Again, this is a reoccurring theme you will hear here at OLF… this is what makes the world hate Christians and not give us the time of day… we’re just too dad-gum judgmental.
JESUS was NOT judgmental… JESUS LOVED everyone, period! And that is what we here at Olathe Life Fellowship are going to do… LOVE PEOPLE… even hateful religious people! That’ll be hard, but with the power of the Holy Spirit working through us we can do it!
With God all things are possible.
Let’s look at the scripture often quoted in regards to homosexuality:
1 Corinthians 6:8-10 “Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers. Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters (anything we put before God, thankless) nor adulterers (Jesus said that to divorce except for marital unfaithfulness and remarry was adultery) nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
Sexual immorality is the word fornication and in the Greek/Hebrew dictionary I found that it’s from the word porneia which is where we get our word pornography – which means harlotry (which is to sell sex), incest, and adultery.
Homosexual (KJV – effeminate)
It’s the Greek word malakos {mal-ak-os’}
1) soft, soft to the touch
2) metaph. in a bad sense
a) effeminate
1) of a catamite
2) of a boy kept for homosexual relations with a man (Adult with an adolescent)
3) of a male who submits his body to unnatural lewdness
4) of a male prostitute
ANOTHER STORY: I had another friend in Bible School that was homosexual for 10 years, and then became a heterosexual.
Now, I am just reporting his story; this is definitely not everyone’s story I have learned.
He was molested as a young boy and later struggled with his sexuality due to the abuse, and living the gay life-style for many years until (as he tells) coming to grips with his being abused as a child and walking through the process of forgiveness and healing… and now living a fulfilled heterosexual life.
This is a much different story then the 2 other guys I interviewed. Both from Christian homes, Mom and Dad still married, no abuse, normal home life. One of them is what we preachers affectionately call a PK, a preacher’s kid - from a mainline denomination.
I learned so much from the homosexuals I interviewed! I really did! It was very enlightening and very helpful. I told them both that I just can’t imagine what that would have been like to deal with… I mean I have always been heterosexual, but yet in my “heterosexuality” I violated God’s plan so many times… losing my virginity at 17 and then living a very promiscuous life until about a year before meeting Jana!
BOTTOM LINE: Now, we’ve touched on a lot of stuff here… let’s come in for a landing!
Q: So how do I love a person who is homosexual?
A:
1.) LISTEN to their story.
Treat them like you would treat anyone else… with respect. And listen to their story! If you listen with your heart open, you will be touched with God’s love for them!
2.) ACCEPT them right where they are.
Don’t try to change them, preach at them, or convert them. Just accept them right where they are!
3.) LET GOD do His work in their heart and life.
I have learned over the years of being a Christian and working with lots of people… God is the miracle worker, not me! He is the one who can change a heart, not me. Now God can work through us, but He is ultimately the one who does the transformation in a life and heart!
CHALLENGE: Ushers are coming down the isle to pass out our custom bracelets with the help of the youth that says, “God Loves Everyone”
Remember that children’s song, Jesus Loves Me this I know, for the Bible tells me so… I believe that LOVE shines forth as LIGHT in a dark hateful world, and Jesus said in John 8:12 “I am the light of the world.” Then in Matthew 5:14 Jesus says we are to be the light of the world. And we show the light of Jesus by our love.
Love is the light of God; let is shine!
So wear this bracelet as a reminder that God loves you, and he also loves everyone else… every person you come in contact with - God loves.
Remember that regardless of what your take on homosexuality is, it’s not our job to condemn or judge... it’s our job to LOVE! We are actually commanded by Jesus to LOVE!
PRAYER:
RESOURCES:
Books
1) Homosexuality and the Politics of Truth
By Jeffrey Satinover
2) Straight & Narrow: Compassion & Clarity in the Homosexuality Debate By Thomas E. Schmidt
3) What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality
By Daniel A. Helminiak
Web Sites
1) www.religioustolerance.org
2) www.twopaths.com
3) www.exodus-international.org
ADDITIONAL SCRIPTURES:
James 2: 8-11
John 13:34
1 John 3:13-17
1 John 4:16
Colossians 3:13
2 Corinthians 5:18-19
