DUCT TAPE DADS
I. Introduction
a. Show Video
b. Pull out your Duct Tape!
i. I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again… Duct Tape Holds the World together… and in light of this video… it holds the family together too!
ii. Dad’s make special use out of Duct Tape!
1. How many of you can relate to those clips!
2. I remember the first diaper I had to change… that dern thing might as well have been a NASA space shuttle that I was trying to assemble and reassmble!
3. And let me tell you the… silencing method… I can tell already that I’m going to be putting that one to use!
c. As I thought about this Father’s Day and I thought about Duct Tape… there was a strange correlation in my little redneck mind.
d. You see… there is a sad reality happening in our world today… more and more families are breaking up… and sadly… more and more fathers are fleeing the scene!
e. What this world needs and what the church needs are some Duct Tape dads… Dads who are holding their families together!
f. How can we be Duct Tape Dads?
i. I Unashamedly tell you this today… we CANNOT do it apart from Jesus Christ!
ii. So today, here on Father’s Day, I thought that I would take this opportunity to challenge the Father’s in the room… and I can officially do that now because I ARE one!!!
g. So how can we be Duct Tape Dads?
h. I want to direct you to a dad in the Bible that probably not too many of you are real familiar with!
i. He’s a man named Elkanah… and you probably don’t know a lot about him b/c he’s actually overshadowed a bit by his wife Hannah, and his son Samuel!
i. So if you will please turn with me to I Samuel Chapter 1
j. I Samuel 1:1-8 “Now there was a certain man from Ramathaim-zophim from the hill country of Ephraim, and his name was Elkanah the son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2He had two wives: the name of one was Hannah and the name of the other Peninnah; and Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children. 3Now this man would go up from his city yearly to worship and to sacrifice to the LORD of hosts in Shiloh. And the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests to the LORD there. 4When the day came that Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and her daughters; 5but to Hannah he would give a double portion, for he loved Hannah, but the LORD had closed her womb. 6Her rival, however, would provoke her bitterly to irritate her, because the LORD had closed her womb. 7It happened year after year, as often as she went up to the house of the LORD, she would provoke her; so she wept and would not eat. 8Then Elkanah her husband said to her, "Hannah, why do you weep and why do you not eat and why is your heart sad? Am I not better to you than ten sons?"
k. Now, some of you know the story but let me just summarize what happens after this…
i. Hannah prays to God for a child and promises to give him back to God!
ii. God opens her womb and she and Elkanah after a period of years give their son Samuel over to the priest Eli to be raised in the house of the Lord.
iii. And of course Samuel goes on to be a very famous prophet who God used in mighty ways!
l. So what can we learn from Elkanah’s example to us today? How can his example help us to be Duct Tape Dads?
II. Duct Tape Dads Model Worship for their Families!
a. “Now this man would go up from the city yearly to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts in Shiloh.”
b. They lead the way in worship
i. V. 21 – “Then the man Elkanah went up with all his household to offer to the Lord the yearly sacrifice and pay his vow.”
ii. When I ran CC at Gardner-Webb, my wrestling coach was also my CC coach… and bless his heart… he was coach b/c they just needed someone, b/c he was really a wrestling coach.
iii. Now don’t get me wrong… I loved Dick Wince… but he had no running background at all.
1. We used to make fun of him at meets b/c he would run around the course and he looked like sasqwatch loping across the fields!
iv. And he was trying his best… but he just didn’t know how to train distance runners.
v. Why?
1. Because he had no experience either being a runner or coaching runners!
vi. The same is true of fatherhood!
1. I don’t know too many fathers out there that wouldn’t want their sons to be godly men!
2. And yet, so many are not willing to lead the way!
vii. I used to get so irritated with parents who would drop their kids off at church.
1. They wanted them to go to church but they did not want to stay themselves!
viii. Dads… we have the lead the way for our sons and daughters… we have to blaze the trail of godliness and worship if we expect our kids to worship!
ix. If we are indifferent during these worship services… then we cannot expect our kids to be any different!
x. If we compromise our beliefs… then we should not be surprised when our kids compromise our guidelines for their lives!
c. They model consistent worship for their families!
i. “Now this man would go up from the city yearly to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts in Shiloh.”
ii. Now granted, yearly doesn’t sound very consistent, but this was a special trip that was made every year outside of their worship at home. And Elkanah was consistent in taking his family to worship!
iii. I am a firm believer that consistency is the key… especially with kids!
iv. You see… worship doesn’t just happen in the context of these four walls! No, true worship is a lifestyle.
v. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 – “These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.”
1. Where were these fathers to model the Word of God? At the dinner table… when they were working in the fields… when they told them their bedtime story!
2. Not necessarily in temple… but in everyday life!
vi. We worship when we are watching a ballgame or mowing the lawn or fixing our cars or talking to our spouse!
vii. And those little eyes are always watching us… always learning from our examples!
viii. And when they see inconsistency… they learn to walk and inconsistent walk with God as well!
III. Duct Tape Dads Love their spouse!
a. Vs. 5 – “but to Hannah he would give a double portion, for he loved Hannah, but the Lord had closed her womb.”
i. I’m going to tell you this with complete conviction of it’s truth… the BEST way we can love our children is by loving our spouse.
ii. Our sons will see how to treat a woman, by how we treat our wives!
iii. Our daughters will see the kind of man they need to marry by the kind of man we are to our wives.
iv. You can give as many gifts as you want, but if you do not show unconditional, sacrificial, selfless love to your wife, then you are not loving your kids!
1. Here’s just a little side note on this subject… we only have our kids for a short period of time, but our wives we will or at least should have till death do us part!
v. How did Elkanah show love to his wife?
b. He provided for her!
i. In this context he obviously provided for her physical needs.
ii. Are we providing for our families!
iii. Our provision though must go beyond physical needs…
1. Are we providing them with communication needs?
2. Are we providing for their emotional needs?
3. What about their spiritual needs?
c. He also loved her selflessly!
i. Notice that his love for her did not depend on what she could offer him.
ii. In Biblical times, children were the ultimate gift a wife could give her husband.
1. If a wife could not give a husband children, then she was often viewed as a failure.
2. So, Hannah being barren was a big deal!
iii. But Elkanah’s love for Hannah did not depend on what she could provide him.
iv. What an amazing biblical truth we can model for our children in the immediate context of our marriage!
v. If we model selfless love to our spouses to our children, then they will grow up with that mentality and mindset.
1. But so often we don’t operate that way… we only show love when “our” needs are being met!
vi. Godly fathers MUST love their spouse!
d. I hear people ask all the time… which is your greatest priority, your children or your spouse.
i. Most people immediately answer… my children… and as a father… I can see how that is your knee jerk reaction to that question.
ii. But I’m telling you, I really believe it is your spouse.
iii. I’ve seen many marriages where the marriage revolved totally around the children and what is the result?
1. The marriage begins to deteriorate and often the tragic end is a divorce… and then what state are those kids in?
2. That is a very difficult spot for kids… a spot that could have been avoided had we nailed this principle down!
IV. Duct Tape Dads Spend Time with their Children!
a. Now… I have to confess that this point is not directly from this text.
b. But as I began to read this amazing story… I began to think about the years between Samuel’s birth and when he was taken to live with the priests.
c. Hannah didn’t just spring this on Elkanah… they must have talked about it quite often.
d. Samuel was a very young child when he was given to the priest Eli to be used for God’s service.
e. As I thought about this I thought about how both Hannah and Elkanah, must have changed the way they spent time with Samuel.
f. Something tells me that they tried to spend every free moment they could with him! In fact, they probably made extra time, just to be with this gift from God.
g. Let me tell you parents something that you already know… our kids grow up real fast.
i. Wyatt was born a year and ½ ago… and I remember holding him in my arms… and all he could do was wiggle, eat, poop and cry!
ii. Now… he’s about as tall as his momma… he’s running around at the speed of light and he saying words!
h. Guys… we don’t have much time with them, so we need to make the time to spend with our kids.
i. I’ve heard the debate, what do our kids need… quantity or quality time?
i. Easy answer… both!
ii. They need BOTH! Listen, if your job is keeping you from investing time into your kids life, then you need to find a way to cut back your hours!
iii. If you have other activities that keep you away from home, you need to re-prioritize!
j. Godly Fathers spend time with their children!!
V. Duct Tape Dads Release their Children to the Lord!
a. The final thing Godly Fathers do is the probably the most difficult… they release them to whatever call God has placed on their life!
b. Vs. 22-23 – “But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, ‘I will not go up until the child is weaned; then I will bring him, that he may appear before the Lord and stay there forever.’ Elkanah her husband said to her, ‘Do what seems best to you. Remain until you have weaned him; only may the Lord confirm His word.’”
c. Now, the emphasis of this passage is always on Hannah, and rightly so…
d. But make no mistake, had Elkanah been unwilling to do this, he would have had a right to say, “uh… I don’t think so!!!”
e. But he was a Godly father… one who was willing to release his child to the Lord!
f. This is a hard one guys… a tough way to truly love our children… we have to be willing to let them go for God’s purposes!
g. I went to SEBTS and it was a very missions oriented seminary! You know who the number one problem maker for students going on the mission field was? PARENTS!!!!
h. Parents who were so self-centered and NOT God or kingdom centered that they did not want their kids and especially their grand kids going to the mission field!
i. Guys… this is NOT what God intended for us as parents!
j. We are raising our children to be men and women of God… men and women who will unite to their spouse and pursue their own life!
k. You know what I try to consistently pray over Wyatt’s life (by the way… that’s another mark of a Godly father… one who prays for his children)?
i. I pray for his safety… I pray for his salvation… and I pray that God would use him for His glory and that Denise and I will have the courage to not only go… but support his calling!
ii. That doesn’t necessarily mean he will be a missionary or pastor… God may call him to be a Dr… but my prayer is that we will let him go to be a Dr. for God’s glory… wherever that may take him!
l. One of the things that I love about my dad the most is that he raised me to be a man of God and to pursue God’s call on my life.
i. When God called us to Maryland… my dad knew he wouldn’t get to see us very much anymore… he knew that when the grandkids came he wouldn’t get to see them very often…
ii. But when God called us here… he was our #1 supporter!
m. Some of you are dealing with this right now… your kids are going off to college or getting married… and your fighting your emotions of letting them go!
n. I Challenge you to let them go this morning… give them to God!
VI. Conclusion
a. Summarize… will you be a Duct Tape Dad!
b. Maybe you’re here and you are not modeling a lifestyle of worship to God… you need to make a commitment to do so today.
i. Are you showing your kids how to serve… how to be obedient and worship?
ii. Are you being consistent in your walk?
c. Maybe you’re here and God’s just jumped all over you about neglecting your spouse… you need to make a commitment to show your love to her this morning for your kids sake!
d. Maybe your career or hobbies or whatever lifestyle is keeping you from spending time with your kids… I hope God convicted you about the shortness of time we have with them and that you will make a commitment (not lip service) to make the time!!!
e. Maybe you’re struggling with the thought of letting our kid go… and you need to give that to God this morning.
f. Here’s the thing… we all are human… we need help with this…
i. I know that I do… so what I’m going to do during our invitation time this morning is to hit my knees here at this altar and pray… pray for help… pray a prayer of commitment!
g. My challenge is that dads… you will join me here!
