Trust Busters Sermon #1: Trust and Marriage
Mark 10:1-12
Sermon Series Introduction
Some people are just waiting to see the People of God live their faith in a manner that establishes its validity. They want to see it work before they embrace it. And some issues go far in building or destroying that confidence. When these issues are handled with wisdom, compassion and obedience, trust is established. When they are handled in a selfish and carnal manner, trust is eroded.
That gives some insight into Jesus’ final words in Mark 9. “Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other.”
Have you ever noticed that there are certain topics that you can talk to people about and others will immediately close them off, shut them down, and bring out hyper-sensitivity? Some such topics are politics, child-rearing, their money, their private life, and their marriage. Those are, for most people, off-limits. I understand fully.
The rub comes when we begin to think that those issues are off-limits to God as well. They aren’t. Whether we like it or not he stands in judgment with approval or correction. His assessment is sovereign and the wise among us will humbly and submissively listen to God’s words on these issues.
Chapter 10 of Mark tackles some of these tough topics – God cares enough to address them. All these teachings are prone to be watered down by modern readers. We dare not because our words and actions must not hinder anyone from coming to the Lord. You will discover that there is someone / something is each part of this chapter that produces hindrance.
Mk 10:1 Jesus then left that place and went into the region of Judea and across the Jordan. Again crowds of people came to him, and as was his custom, he taught them.
Mk 10:2 Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
Mk 10:3 “What did Moses command you?” he replied.
Mk 10:4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.”
Mk 10:5 “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied.
Mk 10:6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’
Mk 10:7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
Mk 10:8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one.
Mk 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
Mk 10:10 When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this.
Mk 10:11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.
Mk 10:12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Some of you here today are dreading this sermon. You are going through a divorce even as we speak. Some of you are feeling your hearts leap from your chest. You have wept, prayed, grieved, fasted, and avoided what is transpiring in your life but, yet, here you are facing a divorce.
May I put you at ease? What I am going to do today is offer you God’s Word and God’s Word is given to us from a posture of grace.
Before we go further we should pray – for you. I want to pray for God to give you a spirit of openness to His Word and that you would sense His presence affirming truth today. I want to pray that the truth will set you free this morning too.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Marriage and divorce was a hot topic in Jesus day.
• It had political ramifications … John the Baptist lost his head over this very issue.
• It had cultural ramifications … Jewish men in particular thought women were property and they could do what they wanted with them and to them.
• It had religious ramifications … It was a significant topic of debate. Two Rabbis had polarized the community by taking diametrically opposing views on the topic. One (Hillel) said that a man could divorce his wife (property) for something as trite and burning a meal.
Aren’t you glad marriage is not a hot topic today? Uh huh … we know better. It is still at the forefront of politics, society, and religion.
• This very week polygamy has been in the news as Warren Jeffs, head of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, goes to trial.
• This very week “gay marriage” has been in the news as Idaho’s Supreme Court ruled that it is constitutional.
• This very week it has come up regarding the presidential candidates.
Nothing has changed.
Do you know why it emerges as a hot topic in every era? Because it is more than just a human issue – it has divine origins and everything that smacks of God’s authority is challenged by humankind. The enemy wants to erode it and, in doing so, erode God’s intent for and within the marriage. The ramifications of marriage in society cannot be overstated and it cannot be discarded either.
So Jesus’ critics decide to trap him by bringing it to the forefront. They suspect that regardless of what he says some will be alienated – some will turn from him. They are fools.
In his answer, Jesus develops two very important arguments.
[1] JESUS TAKES THEM BACK TO MOSES, AND DISCUSSES DIVORCE AS MOSES HANDLED IT.
[2] JESUS GOES BACK EVEN FURTHER -- TO THE TIME OF CREATION.
[1] JESUS TAKES THEM BACK FIRST TO MOSES, AND DISCUSSES DIVORCE AS MOSES HANDLED IT.
Notice that Jesus did not simply answer these Pharisees immediately out of his own authority. He sent them back to Moses first.
Mk 10:3 “What did Moses command you?” he replied.
Mk 10:4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.”
Mk 10:5 “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied.
The passage in question is Deuteronomy 24:1-4:
1 If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, 2 and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, 3 and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, 4 then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
When Jesus took them to Deuteronomy, he did it so he could explain the Law for them. Jesus showed them the motive, the reason, why Moses permitted divorce. This reason is significant and insightful. “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law.”
What is a hard heart? Short version … it is that which has determined to do what it feels like doing in a given situation while ignoring God will.
This is what was going on in the marriages found in Deuteronomy. Husbands were treating their wives with contempt, in spite of God’s will. They were casting off their wives with a word and on a whim.
Moses’ words were intended to curb divorce not sanction it. Moses was making divorce harder to accomplish … there had to be a reason for divorce and a procedure had to be followed. But the hardness of their hearts even distorted that!
• The men took it as divine blessing on divorce rather than seeing it as a concession that God made.
• The result? Their hearts remained hard and the divorce rate was not curbed at all.
• The issue was never the marriage – it was the heart of man.
When man and woman live in right relation to God concessions are not necessary!
[2] JESUS GOES BACK EVEN FURTHER -- TO THE TIME OF CREATION.
After showing the questioners their real problem (a hardened heart) Jesus moves back even further than the law of concession … He goes all the way back to God’s original intent – creation itself.
In doing so, Jesus reframes the discussion. Instead of dignifying divorce – he elevates the sacredness of marriage. He shows us a far deeper and more important truth. After putting his finger on the reason why marriages fail (hardness of heart), he shows us how they can be cured … He reveals the purpose of marriage.
Mk 10:6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’
Mk 10:7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
Mk 10:8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one.
Mk 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
Behind the concept of marriage is the authority of God himself.
• Divorce is contrary to the divine institution
• Divorce is contrary to the nature of marriage
• Divorce is contrary to the divine action by which the union is affected.
o It is precisely here that its wickedness becomes singularly apparent—it is man separating a union that God has constituted.
o Divorce is the breaking of a seal which has been engraved by the hand of God"
Jesus emphasizes God’s desire within marriage when he says “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one. So they are no longer two but one."
Our Lord makes it clear that this relationship is the highest human relationship possible in life. Two unique people with more differences than similarities begin blending their lives and becoming one flesh -- that is what marriage does.
• It is a process, not a single production. The word is in the future tense … they are BECOMING one.
• It is a pilgrimage, not a six weeks’ performance.
• It is intended to be a public portrayal, not a private predicament.
• It is life-long contract, not a renegotiable franchise.
And based upon what marriage is intended to be Jesus gives this warning: Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.
And there’s the crux of the problem! We don’t want to give God sovereignty in this life-long affair. We do not want to recognize that it is a Divine sanction. Think about it – if it is a human concoction then humans can modify it as they please.
We act like it is ion a category with an automobile. Ca r is a human concoction. We can change the body style or engine anytime we want without divine recourse but marriage does not fit that scenario. It has divine origins. Since God is involved it is a different issue altogether.
We’re looking for loopholes rather than celebrating its sacredness.
Marriage is so sacred and its identity so wrapped up in God that it finds its origins in creation itself! There is nothing about to that begins or concludes as a civic union! It is wholly under God’s authority to define and critique.
WRAP-UP
In chapter 9, Jesus confronts the dysfunctional interpersonal relationships between the disciples. We see Jesus’ opinion on how the disciples view each other, “others”, and even how they view Jesus Himself. The crux is / the problem is that the disciples could not get along with anyone.
Jesus’ last words in the chapter (9:50) sum up the problem; “Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other.”
Listen my friends, relationships are still the issue as we transition into chapter 10. Remember, there were no chapter divisions in Mark’s monograph. We are still discovering what it means to be the People of God and how we are to relate to the world as Christ’s ambassadors.
Now, in chapter 10, the focus is on more complex relationships. Society is in the mix. Issues like Marriage, divorce, children, wealth, and the marginalized are addressed. But the answer is still the same … “Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other.”
And the problem is still the same … “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law.”
A hardened heart is inflexible, unteachable, stubborn and stiff-necked. It cannot be molded much less merged into “oneness.”
A softened heart, however, is humble, teachable, moldable, and capable of being merged into oneness. A marriage requires a softened heart if it is to flourish.
Marriage is a physical and societal institution as well as a spiritual one. In fact, the only time it is spiritualized is when it refers to the Christ and the bride. Your marriage is a testimony to the world. When God’s people advocate its dissolution as readily as society we fail to stand as a witness to Christ and a witness against sin.
Divorce is a “trust buster.”
Divorce says, “God’s plan is inoperable … it doesn’t work.”
Divorce says “we are not pursuing God’s ideal and God’s intent.”
Jesus’ questioners were asking the wrong question. God’s design in creating man and woman was that marriage should be an unbroken lifelong union. It is not a contract of temporary convenience and not a union to be dissolved at will. I want to make clear what Jesus said -- divorce is a violation of God’s intention for marriage.
The world is looking to God’s people to see if we are any different that those around them. They are looking to see if our homes run from different values and if we have workable solutions to real human problems.
And they will only see what they are looking for once allow the Spirit to soften our heard hearts and begin to look for God’s solutions and purposes. I assure you, God’s way works.
When we talked about the interpersonal relationships of chapter 9 and how they found solution in 9:50 I asked you if God was idealistic or naïve? I asked you if God was wrong to think we could be seasoned and could get along. You said no.
I ask you again – Is God wrong to think that marriage is capable of being seasoned and a witness to society?
I God wrong to think that if we allow the Spirit to soften our hesrts that marriage can work?
Again, the answer is no.
Mk 9:50 “Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other.”
Mk 10:6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’
Mk 10:7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
Mk 10:8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one.
Mk 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
He who has ears to hear
Let Him hear
