Mother’s Day 2003: Honor Your Mother
Ephesians 6:2-3; Deuteronomy 5:16
Ephesians 6:2. “Honor your Father and Mother which is the first commandment with a promise, so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.”
Deuteronomy 5:16: “Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the Lord you God gives you.”
One of the first things I learned as a child was to respect my parents, especially my mother. As a child, I was around my mother more because my father for a long time worked more than one job to provide for the family. I do not recall one time that my mother ever told me “Wait till your father gets home and he will deal with you.” Oh no, my mother was from the “very old school” who believed in taking care of things right then and there. So for that reason, I head a very real respect for my mother at a very young age. As I grew older, I learned to honor her, and now her memory. I also learned to honor my wife as the mother that she is and all of the other mothers here today.
I love to read Calvin & Hobbes comic strip. For those of you not familiar with this comic, Calvin is a 7-year (Dennis the Menace) and Hobbes is his stuffed tiger that is actually alive to him. Anyway, in one book, for Mother’s Day, Calvin is standing by his mother’s bed when he says “Hey, Mom! Wake up. I made you a Mother’s Day card.” His mother was very please and started to read the card out loud as Calvin stood there smiling. This is what the card said:
“I was going to buy a card with hearts of pink and red.
But then I thought I’d rather, spend the money on me instead.
It’s awfully hard to buy things when one’s allowance is so small.
So I guess you’re plenty lucky I got you anything at all.
Happy Mother’s Day. There, I’ve said it, now I’m done.
So how about getting out of bed and fixing breakfast for your son.”
Now Calvin had the right idea in deciding to give her “a” card, but being true to form, his natural instinct to be self absorbed took over and the results ended in what was written in the card. So may times we are like Calvin, so self absorbed that we cannot appreciate others, especially our mothers who made/makes sacrifices for us daily.
Almost 90 years ago, by an act of Congress, President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed the second Sunday in May as Mother’s Day. He established the day as a time for “public
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expression of our love and reverence for the mothers of our country. All of us are products of our mother. Everything that you needed to know, somewhere along the line, a mom probably taught you. Here are a few of the things we have learned from mothers that I received from others (J. Smith, sermoncentral.com, Cynthia, etc) and from my own mother. I am sure you will be able to relate.
My mother taught me:
• It’s okay for a man to cry. I cried almost every time I got whipping and she thought that that was okay (actually good for me) because I was learning my lesson.
• Logic. She asked, “If everyone else jumps off the cliff are you going to jump too?
• To Cook. “If you’re hungry, go in the kitchen and fix you something, there is no maid in this house.”
• Value of Image. “Boy you want to dress like you have a million dollars and you don’t have a pot to pee in.”
• To Meet a Challenge. “What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you… don’t talk back to me”
• Wisdom that comes with Age. “Keep on living, you’ll see, you’ll understand.”
• Anticipation and receiving (with it’s okay to cry). “When we get home, I’m getting you. Remember what you did last week, okay it’s time.”
• Sex. “I have raised my kids – I won’t raise yours - so keep it in your pants.”
What other mother’s taught:
• Medicine. “If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they will freeze that way.”
• To think ahead. “If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job.”
• Humor. “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.
• Roots. “Do you think you were born in a barn?
• Genetics. “You’re just like your father.”
• Justice. “One day you will have kids and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you will see what it’s like. I can’t wait!”
• Recipes: “A hard head makes a soft behind.”
• Our too roots. “I am not your friend’s mother, I am your mother.”
• Value of words. “If you cannot say anything nice to someone, don’t say anything at all.
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All of these sayings, though maybe not all true and factual, carry lessons that only mothers can convey with that sense of assurance as if you had just spoken to God Himself. Mothers – a good mother is a blessing, a treasure.
My mother died 17 years ago yesterday, May 10th, 1986. I had a wonderful mother, not perfect, but wonderful just the same. I loved my mother so much that I wanted to marry someone who was like her – because in my mind, I had the best. I am sure many of you feel the same way about your mother. I was blessed when God gave me my wife, who in a lot of ways, have things in common with my mother. I will not go into specifics, but she is a blessing and a very good mother. I did not have the time to honor her as I would if she were alive today. I loved and appreciated her, we were close, but I do not feel that I truly gave her the honor that she deserved. Today it really bothers me when I see kids who do not honor their mother – especially those “good” mothers who are doing the best that they can with what they have. Sometimes I just want to take them and shake some sense into them – but I can’t do that – you all would be visiting me in jail.
Mothers are different from fathers. They think differently, act differently, process emotions differently. While men are told we must be the strong one, the head of the family, often times behind the closed doors of the house, men would lose their minds without their wife – especially as it relates to taking care of the kids. A mother can multi-task (cook, clean, wash, help with homework, etc) all at the same time while the average man must focus in on one thing at a time. A mother is the cement that holds the family together. A good mother is not only a mother to her own kids, but also wherever she goes, others confide in her as if she was their mother. She becomes the “foster” mother for her kids’ friends, especially if they do not have a good mother themselves. Sometimes, that good mother becomes the mother to her husband. I cannot tell you how many times I have been told “I am raising three kids”. You know how men can act sometimes. The reason we can get away with acting like that is because we have a good, strong mother living in our households. We may never say it, but it is a comfort, it brings us pleasure and without that “mother”, our wives, we could be lost.
A mother, a wonderful person that God gives special intuition as it relates to their child. A good mother has a bond to her children that a father does not have – one that carry with it the teaching to a child that will carry that to their child. In our society today, mothers are not appreciated as much as they should or used to be. Just look at what is on TV now. Back in the day you had “Ozzie and Harriet”, “Leave it to Beaver”, “The Cosbys”. Today we have the “Simpsons”, “The Osbournes” etc. Mothers are down graded to a position just above a childhood friend of their kids. We have lost the meaning of the term “honor your mother”.
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The Greek word for honor means to “show respect, to give recognition”. How can we honor our Mothers? Is this something that we can do everyday, or just on Mother’s Day when we buy her gifts, flowers and a card. When Paul wrote Ephesians, he addressed the need of honoring parents by reminding the “children” that this was one of the Ten Commandments that carried with it a promise. The fact that this commandment carried with it a promise demonstrates how important this commandment is to each of us. Also remember that during this time the parents had authority over their children until the day that they died. It was not as it is now, where a child says “I’m 18, or 21 and I can do what I want – you can’t control me!” The fact that we are at this point makes it that much harder for our children, and us, to fulfill this commandments that carries with it a warning. No where in the Scripture does it ever say that this commandment is now null and void – it is still active and still carries the same promise.
Honoring our parents carries the promise of a long life. We honor them by how we treat them as well as how we live our own lives. Remember, when this was written, it was during a time when parents exercised authority throughout the lives of their children – even when they became adults. Honor is higher than obedience. Honor is the regard due to those, who by divine appointment, are above us and to whom our most respectful consideration is due. As you read what Paul says in Ephesians 6, it is an appeal to part of our nature, that part that focuses inward. Paul is speaking to that part of our nature that is selfish and self-centered, not the goodness. Remember Calvin and the card that he gave to his mother. Remember how self centered it was. This is the part of our nature that Paul is speaking to. It is hard to envision the future and what it holds, but Paul is re-emphasizing that this commandment carries a promise that affects our future.
5 Ways to Honor Your Mother
1. Do what you are told – no back talk. Often times we all feel like we have choices in the things that we do – that what we feel is important should be considered. But, in honoring your mother, do what she tells you without question because she cares for you. If you mother is walking with Christ and is living according to His ways, you can trust that she would never tell you to do anything that would violate your walk with Christ or that would put you in harms way.
2. Be thankful. Whatever your mother does for you, be thankful. Whatever she buys for you, even if it is ugly and not in style, be thankful. When she fixes a dinner that you do not like be thankful. When she goes out of her way to do something for you or to attend one of your school functions, be thankful. Being thankful shows appreciation and a willingness to accept the generosity of your mother.
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3. Be responsible. Clean your room and do your chores. This may seem trivial, but mothers take this to heart. Everything that they put into us is evaluated by how we use that information. When we fail to clean our rooms, do our chores and be responsible, they take that as if they have failed in some way. Honor your mother by being responsible, do your chores and keep your room clean.
4. Do something nice for them – weekly. Some think that they should only do something nice for their mothers on special occasions, i.e. Mothers Day, Christmas, and her birthday. To honor her, do something nice for her weekly or monthly. Do not wait for special occasions – let her know that she is special to you.
5. Tell her daily “Mom, I Love You”. The three most important words in the world, if said with truthfulness, are “I love you”. Those words can heal hurts, calm fears and bring peace to any situation. They last a lifetime. No mother can resist the affectionate words of their child when that child is saying that they love them.
I have tried in this message to share with you how special mothers are to me. I do not feel that I have done this adequately, for I struggled to find the words that really tell what is within me for my mother who is gone and for my wife. I cannot give you the words to say to your mother, I cannot tell you what to say. But today is Mother’s Day and I want to allow each child to go find their mother now, give them a hug and tell them I love you or whatever else you may have on your heart to tell them.
Conclusion
I want to conclude with these words from John Stiles:
“I have worshipped in churches and chapels. I have prayed in the busy streets.
I have sought my God and have found Him in the waves of His ocean beat.
I have knelt in the silent forest in the shade of some ancient tree.
But the dearest of all my altars was at my mother’s knee.
God makes me the man of her vision and purge me of selfishness.
God keep me true to her standards and help me to live to bless.
God hallow the holy impress of the days that used to be
And keep me a pilgrim forever to the shrine at my mother’s knee.”
May God forever bless and keep each of you mothers as you fulfill the ultimate callings of motherhood.
