Peer Pressure (NIV)
(How Ungodly Friends Lead You Astray)
INTRO
The youth of our generation faces incredible peer pressure and dangers every day in the world.
Every day:
1,000 unwed teenage girls become mothers
1,106 teenage girls get abortions
4,219 teenagers contract sexually transmitted diseases
500 adolescents begin using drugs
1,000 adolescents begin drinking alcohol
135,000 kids bring guns or other weapons to school
3,610 teens are assaulted; 80 are raped
2,200 teens drop out of high school
6 teens commit suicide
(Taken from "Right from Wrong" by Josh Mcdowell page 18)
Every generation has had its own pressures but the current faces perhaps the toughest and most dangerous of challenges.
Peer Pressure Nowadays
1 Pressure to drink/try alcohol
2 Pressure to experiment with drugs
3 Pressure for Pre-marital sex
4 Pressure to disobey parents
5 Pressure to disobey God
When a person falls prey to theses pressures, they are falling victim to their sinful nature. The end result is not worth the short-term feelings.
Galatians5:19-21
GAL 5:19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Proverbs 16:17
PR 16:17 The highway of the upright avoids evil; he who guards his way guards his life.
Just because “everybody’s doing it” doesn’t mean you have to
Exodus 23:2
EX 23:2 "Do not follow the crowd in doing wrong.”
Just because you are young doesn’t mean you cant set an example and refuse to follow the “in crowd”.
1 Timothy 4:12
12 Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
Where does peer pressure come from?
Friends
Society/Popular Culture
Since friends have the most influence lets look at that first.
Proverbs 17:17
PR 17:17 A friend loves at all times,
If a person really is your friend they wont try to talk you into doing something bad.
They will show love by not leading you down the wrong paths.
Some of you have the wrong kind of friends and have been walking down the wrong kind of paths.
2 Corinthians 6:14
2CO 6:14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
Amos 3:3
AM 3:3 Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?
Don’t hang around with ungodly people or have ungodly friends unless you are on a mission to witness to them and lead them to righteousness.
If you hang around with ungodly people long enough (even if you are saved) they can influence you to do something bad.
Proverbs 13:20
PR 13:20 He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Society/Pop Culture
Children bombarded by images of sex, drugs, rebellion, violence in TV, movies, video games, and internet.
Pop Culture- "It’s ok to drink, do drugs, have unprotected sex"
Now that we have looked at who influences, lets look at what they influence us to do.
1 Alcohol
These sobering statistics show how alcohol affects the world of a child. They are from http://www.niaaa.nih.gov/ResearchInformation/
Alcohol is the #1 drug of choice among our Nation’s youth.
1
Research indicates that adolescents who abuse alcohol may remember 10% less of what they have learned than those who don’t drink.
2
In a 2003 National Survey on Drug Use & Health, persons reporting first use of alcohol before age 15 were more than 5 times as likely to report past year alcohol dependence or abuse than persons who first used alcohol at age 21 or older (16% vs. 3%).
3
Almost 20% of 8th-graders, and 42% of 10th-graders have been drunk at least once.
More than 11% of 8th-graders, 22% of 10th-graders, and 29% of 12th-graders report binge drinking (five drinks in a row in the last two weeks)
Dangers of Alcohol
Nearly 75% of all Americans drink at least occasionally
13 million people in America have alcohol problems
7 million people in this country are in some form of alcoholism
50% of fatal car crashes involve drunkenness
64% or murders are associated with alcohol
1 out of every 10 “social drinkers” become alcoholic
Alcohol is the # 2 killer behind heart disease, even more than cancer
500,000 Americans die each year from alcoholism
What does the Bible say about Alcohol?
Proverbs 20:1
PR 20:1 Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler; whoever is led astray by them is not wise.
The things we’re talking about today (Alcohol, Drugs, Sex) are all things that Satan tries to tempt you into in order to defile your body.
Your body is not really your own, it belongs to God
1 Corinthians 6:19,20
19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
(Beer, Drugs, Sex, wouldn’t do them in or at church, don’t do them outside of it)
2 DRUGS
Campus Drugs: A recent Columbia National Center survey finds that 28% of middle-school-students reported drugs are used, kept or sold at their schools, up 47% since ’02. 62% of high schoolers say drugs are at their schools. (PWB 8/19/05)
Sad Scene A recent survey of teens in U.S. drug treatment centers found that 20% of teens have shared drugs with their parents and that in about 5% of cases, parents introduced their kids to drugs. (CT 10/13)
Loving Drugs more than God is a form of Idolatry.
Other than Alcohol, Marijuana is the most common and easily accessible drugs.
Marijuana is a “gateway drug”-opens up road to other hardcore drugs.
Drug addiction will lead you into breaking all of the 10 Commandments.
(Steal, Lie, Murder, Covet, Dishonor Parents)
Drugs are an incredible temptation.
James 1:14,15
14 but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.
Temptation for escape, power(steroids)
(ILLUS-Chris Benoit Story)
1 Corinthians 10:13
13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
ILLUS-Pastor In NC
I remember setting in the church office working on a sermon when I heard something in the sanctuary. As I got out there I saw a ragged young man stepping out the door. I caught up with him and asked if I could help him. He was crying and proceeded to tell me who he was and that he felt something call him to this place and he was afraid.
It turned out that he was one of the biggest drug dealers in the area and he wanted help to get cleaned up and change his life. A few years earlier he was a member of a church in Raleigh with a wife and a new baby, and then he got hooked on drugs.
Over the previous two years, as the drugs took over, he lost his home, his wife and child and everything he’d worked for. And then the drugs became his master. He was a slave to his habit. He now sold the drugs he craved to support his habit.
I asked if he knew Jesus and he told me that he lost sight of Him long ago. At this point I was at a loss as to how to handle the situation, so I began to pray. He talked, I listened and prayed and then the words came. With more eloquence than I had in me the words flowed.
Before long this young man had rededicated his life to Christ and allowed me to help him get into a rehab clinic. Once he was dropped off and checked in, we prayed once more and I left him in God’s hands.
Two weeks past when I got a collect call from Raleigh, it was the ex-wife letting me know that he had stayed with the rehab and was doing much better. She thanked me for all the help and asked if there was any way we could help him get a ticket home to her and his daughter. Through a program at the Salvation Army a bus ticket was made available and home he went. A few months latter I received a call that it was hard but he was holding down a job, back in a church family and remarried to his wife.
God can rescue the most unlikely of people and call on us at the most unlikely times to help him out.
3 SEX
Teen Sex
Roughly 20% of young teens (ages 13-16) are sexually active; not counting those who don’t think oral sex is really sex. 12% have had oral sex. Only 15% of parents say their young teen is sexually active beyond kissing while nearly 30% of teens admit going there. About 85% of parents think they talk to their kids about sex and relationships, but only 41% of kids agree. (Beverly LaHaye Institute 1/28/05)
STATS
1 in 4 teenagers have an STD
A teenage female who is sexualy active and doesnt pratice safe sex has a 90% chance of getting pregnant within 1 year.
Matthew 5:27,28
MT 5:27 "You have heard that it was said, `Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Sex outside of marriage is Adultery.
ILLUS-Attitudes of Sex
Teens are facing an intimacy crisis that could haunt them in future relationships. Casual teen attitudes toward sex — particularly oral sex — reflect their confusion about what is normal behavior. “When teens fool around before they’re ready or have a very casual attitude toward sex, they proceed toward adulthood with a lack of understanding about intimacy. What it means to be intimate is not clearly spelled out for young people by their parents and people they trust,” writes Sabrina Weill in her book The Real Truth About Teens & Sex. (USA Today 10/18/05)
I was guilty of this myself because I did not know any better. Now I do and so do you
1 Peter 1:14
14 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.
1 Thess. 4:4-5
4 that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God;
Teen boys-pressured by friends and sometimes Fathers.
Teen girls-Pressured by boyfriends.
SEXUALITY TEENS AND SEX / RESEARCH REVIEW
Pauley, J. (1995). Sex, teens, and public schools. NBC.
One million U.S. teenagers become pregnant each year.
U.S. has highest rates for teenage pregnancies, abortions, and child bearing in the industrialized world.
In 1970, 70% of U.S. teenage births were to married teenagers.
By 1990, 70% of U.S. teenage births were to unmarried teenagers.
The U.S. spends $34 billion a year in welfare payments to families headed by teenage mothers.
As mentioned in the documentary, "Nobody, not politicians, not pastors, nor parents know what to do about it."
The following statistics are staggering:
Eighty-three percent of all babies born to teens are born to poor, low-income girls.
One third of teen mothers gives birth to a second baby within two years.
Two thirds of all teenage girls who become pregnant have been sexually or physically abused.
Seven out of ten teens become sexually active while in high school.
Four out of ten girls will become pregnant while teenagers.
Two out of ten girls will become teenage mothers.
Eight out of ten teen mothers drop out of school and eight out of ten of their children will grow up in poverty.
How are we to combat this?
By living by the Spirit of God and not following desires or pressures for sex.
Galatians 5:16-17
GAL 5:16 So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want.
Boys/Girls-Your bodies are precious gifts that are meant to only be given to your Husband or Wife.
1 Corinthians 6:18
1CO 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
Best way to combat against things we’ve discussed so far-FAMILY
In a study of 14,700 teens, University of North Carolina sociologist Kathleen Harris discovered that girls with involved fathers are more likely to delay sex and less likely to use drugs or alcohol. (Children’s Ministry 11-12/98
Which leads us to our next pressure
4 DISOBEY PARTENTS
Perhaps the most common and easy pressure to sub cum to.
God recognizes the importance of children obeying their parents.
Exodus 20:12
EX 20:12 "Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
This was the first commandment that had a promise attached to it. “Live Long”
Ephesians 6:1-3
EPH 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise-- 3 "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."
Leviticus 19:3 and Colossians 3:20
God recognizes that the family is the first and foremost influence on a child.
As kids, your view of parents changes with age.
"Children and Their Changing Attitude Towards Their Parents."
Age 4: "My parents can do anything"
Age 8: "There might be one or two things they don’t know."
Age 12: "Naturally, my parents don’t understand."
Age 14: "I never realized how hopelessly old fashioned they are."
Age 21: "You would expect them to feel that way; they are out of date."
Age 25: "They come up with a good idea now and then."
Age 30: "I wonder what Mom and Dad think I should do?"
Age 40: "Let’s be patient until we discuss it with our parents."
Age 50: "What would Mom and Dad have thought about it?"
Age 60: "I wish I could talk it over with them one more time”
The way I see it is this-5 Stages
Children-“Fixer of Toys, Destroyer of Monsters Under The Bed”
Teens- “Ruiner s of My Good Time and Crampers of My Style”
Young Adults- “Saving Graces In Jams”
Adults- “Sources of Wisdom and Guidance”
Older Adults- “What You Want To Be To Your Kids”
Do you want your parents to be proud of you?
Proverbs 23:22,24,25
PR 23:22 Listen to your father, who gave you life,
and do not despise your mother when she is old.
PR 23:24 The father of a righteous man has great joy;
he who has a wise son delights in him.
PR 23:25 May your father and mother be glad;
may she who gave you birth rejoice!
The parent who suffers the most with disobedient children is the Mom
Proverbs 10:1
A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son grief to his mother.
ILLUS-Pastor Lloyds Mom
It is a parents job to discipline you when you mess up. They are doing it out of love.
“If they love me why are they so hard on me?”
Proverbs 3:11,12
PR 3:11 My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke,
PR 3:12 because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.
Proverbs 1:7
PR 1:7 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.
When your parents tell you not to do something, they are usually speaking from experience. Be wise-take the advice.
5 DISOBEY GOD
“Don’t listen to your parents.” “Don’t Go to Church, there is no God.”
“Lets go get drunk/stoned.” “You’re not a man unless you’ve had sex.”
Some of the things you might hear from ungodly friends.
Friends will pressure you to disobey God because they are not believers themselves.
They don’t know God themselves, therefore they will never give you Godly advice.
Proverbs 14:7
PR 14:7 Stay away from a foolish man, for you will not find knowledge on his lips.
One of the keys to understanding our relationship to God is in understanding that God wants us to obey Him not for His sake, but for ours. God loves us so much that He wants us to avoid the pitfalls and disappointments of this life. He knows that when we take on the attitude of Christ, we will be happy and satisfied. Our obedience to Him is to our great benefit in our lives today and forever.
It takes effort to be obedient to God. It doesn’t “just happen”.
Respected Bible scholar D. A. Carson said this:
People do not drift toward holiness.
Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord.
Amos 5:14
AM 5:14 Seek good, not evil, that you may live. Then the LORD God Almighty will be with you, just as you say he is.
The actions of a person disobedient to God demonstrate a will that is not surrendered to God.
That great saint and missionary pioneer, Hudson Taylor said, "The real secret of an unsatisfied life lies too often in an unsurrendered will." Halfhearted obedience satisfies neither us, nor God.
It takes a person who is willing to let go of their arrogance to surrender their will and realize that God is the one in charge.
Roger Staubach who led the Dallas Cowboys to the World Championship in ’71 admitted that his position as a quarterback who didn’t call his own signals was a source of trial for him. Coach Landry sent in every play. He told Roger when to pass, when to run and only in emergency situations could he change the play (and he had better be right!). Even though Roger considered coach Landry to have a "genius mind" when it came to football strategy, pride said that he should be able to run his own team.
Roger later said, "I faced up to the issue of obedience. Once I learned to obey there was harmony, fulfillment, and victory."
All of the things we’ve talked about (Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, Disobedience) are Satans ways to draw you away from God and bring hardships upon your family. But you maybe asking “Why should I bother? What’s in it for me?”
God has made us a promise.
Isaiah 1:19,20
ISA 1:19 If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the best from the land;ISA 1:20 but if you resist and rebel, you will be devoured by the sword." For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.
I urge you today to choose the path of righteousness that leads to God and Heaven. Dont be a friend of the world. You cannot love the world and God at the same time.
James 4:4
JAS 4:4 You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
While in the world some unbelievers constantly play “Simon says”. Well the world is Simon and many are doing exactly what the world says. The world says have same sex relationships, so they do! The world says get drunk and do drugs and they do! The world says rebel against your parents, and yes you know they do! But once God sets you apart from the world there is a new game that should be learned called “Jesus says.” It’s sad, but many Christians are still playing “Simon says” instead of doing what Jesus says. At the end of time many will find themselves lifting their eyes from hell standing right next to Simon.
So how are we able to resist following the peer pressures of the world?
CLOSING
Romans 12:1-2
RO 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.
It is not in Gods will that you be bound by any temptation or pressures in this world.
ALTAR CALL for those struggling with temptations/pressures from world/friends.
