A WIFE STRIVING FOR GODLINESS
INTRODUCTION:
A. The observation has often been made that our generation is starving for heroes that it can
admire and role models that it can look up to and emulate:
1. If looking in the music industry, Hollywood, & sports this is certainly true! (Examples)
2. Maybe there are less proportionally than there used to be, but there are still many great
role models if we will look in a spiritual direction! (Examples)
3. One area where role models seem to be especially lacking is in the home – Where are
the great fathers? The great husbands? The great mothers? And the great wives?
B. This morning let’s study about wives – The kind of wife striving to please God & be her
best in her relationship to her husband – A true hero & role model!
I. THE CHARACTERISTICS OF A WIFE WHO IS STRIVING FOR GODLINESS:
A. She is willingly submissive to her husband:
1. Peter begins by instructing wives to be submissive to their husbands (I Peter 3:1)
2. For the woman who is striving for godliness, submission is not something she dreads or
something she sees as a limitation – it’s something she embraces:
a. Submission is an obligation – She knows God has given her a role in the marriage
relationship & has commanded her to submit & she wants to please the Lord
b. Submission is an opportunity – An opportunity to set a good example, teach others
through her life, and here, an opportunity to influence an unbelieving husband
c. Submission is an ornament –As some find glory in gold, pearls, & costly clothes…
Her attitude & character of submissiveness clothes, beautifies, & glorifies her!
3. A great negative example is Samson’s wife – How she nagged & manipulated him
showed her wickedness & unwillingness to submit (Jud 14:15-17)
4. The woman who is submissive may have the power to prick the heart of her unfaithful
a. There’s a play on words here – The wives are to remain quiet (without a word) so
that the husbands who have been disobedient to the word may be changed
b. He may not listen to the gospel or respond to it but he lives daily with a powerful
example of the power of Christ & the gospel in his face… You can’t ignore that
c. This woman understands the role God has given her and wants to be submissive…
she doesn’t want to nag him with the gospel so she just lives it! (Prov 19:13)
d. Illust: Woman’s husband gave her a hard time… one day disconnected battery
cables… car wouldn’t crank so without a word to her husband she started walking… he later felt bad, showed up at services & then obeyed the gospel
B. She demonstrates conduct that is consistent with godliness:
1. The way this wife conducts her life is motivated by her passion for godliness (1 Pet 3:1-2)
2. A godly wife’s conduct is described here as being chaste: (Titus 2:3-5)
a. Chaste means – Clean, innocent, modest, and pure Her life is clean, her speech
wholesome, and her dress is modest
b. Some wives feed off attention from other men and are overtly flirtatious… But this
wife is chaste & there’s only one man she wants to chase her… her husband!
3. Chaste conduct in and of itself is not the goal, but it’s to be accompanied by fear:
a. This may refer to her attitude to her husband – Since fear simply means to respect
it certainly fits… She doesn’t just submit because she has to, but desires to!
b. She is a woman her fears God first and foremost… This motivates her attitude
toward her husband and her conduct throughout her life! (Proverbs 3:5-7)
C. Her focus is not on showing off her outward beauty but developing her inward beauty:
1. The wife who is really trying to please God doesn’t make externals her focus (I Tim 3:3)
a. When people think of this woman their first thoughts shouldn’t be, “Wow her hair is
fixed up perfectly! She’s got great costly jewelry! Her clothes are the finest!
b. In our society sexy sells… and it sells BIG! It’s used to market everything from
acne medicine to shoes – Many women want to appear beautiful & sexy & will
sacrifice anything to achieve it… Even their modesty, practicality, & spirituality!
c. We need to look at her need for modesty (I Tim 2:9-10) – She refuses to dress in
way to draw sexual attention to herself since she is her husband’s & she
doesn’t want to draw undue attention to herself by dressing too flamboyantly
d. Some never grew up… They live in a Barbie world wanting everything their Barbie
had! Think: “If Barbie is so great, why do you have to buy all her friends?”
2. It seems like many wives, and women in general, in our society put far more concern in
the external things than on their inward beauty of godliness: (1 Tim 2:9-10)
a. I’ve often wondered why this is the case… I believe there are three main reasons:
1) One reason is obvious… Many just don’t love God with all their hearts,
aren’t concerned with spiritual things, the physical defines them!
2) Some cause they receive more attention from guys when they put more
focus here – How often do guys gauck after girls for their great heart?
3) Finally, a woman can make herself look better externally with minimal effort
when compared to the effort it takes to develop a beautiful character
b. What vanity this is! First of all, to use Jesus’ words, it’s like whitewashing a tomb!
But beyond that fact, beauty is deceitful and it fades away! (Proverbs 31:30)
c. Some women are very beautiful on the outside, but it’s a vain beauty! (Prov 11:22)
3. Remember, her submission is an ornament – What Peter says next is that her character,
her godliness, is what truly makes her a beautiful woman! (I Peter 3:4-5)
4. Does this passage mean it’s wrong for a woman to put time, effort, and even some money
into making outward appearance beautiful?
a. The NASB captures the idea when it says, “Your adornment must not be merely
external” Not a blanket condemnation but that shouldn’t be her first priority!
b. Like: “Do not labor for the food which perishes but for the food which endures to
everlasting life” (John 6:27) – Later we’re told unless we work neither should we eat (2 Thess 3:10) Physical work is not to be our drive & first priority
D. Peter finally gives Sarah as a great example to look to in applying these principles:
1. Immediately someone might think, “I’d have no problem with submission or fulfilling my
duties as a godly wife if I had a husband like Abraham!”
a. Didn’t he lie twice by only saying Sarah was his sister so his life would be spared?
He would let Pharaoh & ________ lie with her to protect himself… SELFISH!
b. Abraham was not a perfect husband – He was a great man but still a man… He
surely made mistakes in the marriage & needed to make things right with her!
2. Sarah demonstrated her submission by calling Abraham lord (1 Peter 3:6)
a. Sarah submitted to Abraham by obeying him, respecting him, and supporting him
b. Some may be appalled at this concept… Does this mean a woman should obey
her husband? That’s certainly part of submission! For the same reason many
won’t fully obey God’s word… they have to put God’s will above their own!
c. This doesn’t give a husband the right to bark orders at his wife just to see her obey,
be harsh with her, or make decisions w/o considering her… His leadership in
the home is to be after the likeness of Christ’s leadership… in love! (Eph 5:25)
d. Certainly we see there’s a limit here – She’s only obeys him so far as his requests
don’t contradict God’s laws! She must obey God rather than man (Acts 5:49)
3. When a woman possesses these characteristics she is called a daughter of Sarah!
a. Illustration: Like “Daughters of the American Revolution” or “Son of ______”
b. When we walk by faith we are called “Sons of Abraham” – When a woman walks in
fear & chaste conduct & submission to her husband she’s a daughter of Sarah
c. If she refuses to follow these she’s closer to being a daughter of Jezebeel… known
for manipulating her husband & putting too great a focus on external beauty
Conclusion: A worldly woman hears these words and sees them as archaic, as forfeiting her rights, and as degrading. For the wife who is striving for godliness the power and fulfillment found in applying these instructions are clearly seen! The question is which life do you want to live? Want a good marriage? Apply the principles in this section and live it! Live First Corinthians 13! Live Ephesians 5!
