“LOST TREASURES” OR “THE TERRIBLE SIN OF FORNICATION”
TEXT: Proverbs 4:23-27, 5:1-23, 6:20-26 W. Max Alderman
INTRODUCTION: These Scriptures Warn! They warn of the high cost of sexual impurity and sexual sin. It warns of the sin of fornication and the sin of adultery. Marriages and homes have been destroyed because of this sin. Spouses are devastated by this sin and children are scarred. This sin creates a state of distrust where it becomes most difficult, if not impossible to be open and honest with your marriage mate. Real lasting happiness comes when we discover and agree that God’s way, as it pertains to sexual purity and marriage fidelity - as given to us in His Word, is the best way.
DEFINITIONS AND DISCUSSION:
1. FORNICATION- Sexual impurity (KJV Dictionary)
2. ADULTERY- conjugal infidelity. An adulterer was a man who had illicit intercourse with a married or a betrothed woman, and such a woman was an adulteress. Intercourse between a married man and an unmarried woman was fornication. Adultery was regarded as a great social wrong, as well as a great sin. (Easton’s Bible Dictionary)
In this study, we will not be looking at the specific ways that fornication and adultery are the same and are different; we instead will look at the two as being a sexual sin against one’s purity and also how this sin affects the lives of others. We also will show how this sin will rob one of his life treasures. For the next few minutes, we will look at: “LOST TREASURES” or “THE TERRIBLE SIN OF FORNICATION”.
I. THE POSSIBILITY OF FORNICATION AS IT APPLIES TO ADULTERY. (Proverbs 6:23-24a)
“To keep thee from the evil woman” implies that one may fornicate by pursuing after the evil woman, and with that being so the Word of God gives instructions on how to be protected from the adulteress. Notice ways that fornication and adultery happens:
A. When You Degrade Your Spouse. (Malachi 2:14)
The Book of Malachi warns against such when it says,”Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.”
1. You degrade her when you criticize her… (1 Peter 3:7)
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with [them] according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
The wife is to be honored. You should exercise Godly chivalry and kindness towards your wife. Know her needs and minister to them. Be constantly trying to be a blessing to “your bride” rather than pretend that you have “another bride” somewhere…
2. You degrade her when you compare her… (Proverbs 5:19-20)
“Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. And why will thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?”
One of the wicked aspects of pornography is that it causes you to make comparisons. This is the reason that pornography is a multi-billion dollar business because so many are comparing what they have to some pornographic harlot. God help us!
B. When You Disregard the Scriptures (Proverbs 7:1-5)
“My son, keeps my words, and lay up my commandments with thee. Keep my commandments, and live; and my law as the apple of thine eye. Bind them upon thy fingers; write them upon the table of thine heart. Say unto wisdom. Thou are my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman: That they may keep thee from the strange woman, from the stranger which flattered with her words.
1. By not recognizing the Scriptures. (7:1-2a)
Please notice in the above verses that the emphasis’ is upon “My words”; “my commandments”; “my law”. The father was emphasizing that it was the father’s words that his son were to recognize and follow. Today, in our secular humanistic society, which is involved in a cultural war with its politically correct teachings, a believer would have no sense of direction or purpose if it were not for the Holy Scriptures. Just as we have been taught last week in our “prayer revival”, it is very important that the father teaches the Scriptures and that the children recognize what is being taught and do them.
2. By not responding to the Scriptures. (7:2b.-5)
“Bind them upon thy fingers”; “write them upon the table of thine heart”. To bind on the fingers means that the warnings of the Scriptures ought to be readily available just as a ring on ones finger. We have used the expression, “tie a string around your finger to remind you” as a means of not forgetting. Also, the truths of God’s Word regarding this subject should be memorized and not forgotten. Our attitude towards the Truth should also be as having a close relationship to someone. The father said that wisdom is to be called “a sister” and understanding is to be called “thy kinswoman”. Our relationship to Truth should carry that kind of great respect. When it is so, there will be greater protection in the marriage.
C. When You Desecrate The Sacred. (Malachi 2:14)
“”Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.”
Sexual impurity of any kind can lead to the desecration of the marriage covenant. The covenant is a vow that the marriage partners make to each other. It should never be compromised or violated. Commitment and truthfulness should mark the marriage. When you cheat on your mate you are weakening the strength of the vows that you made.
II. THE PROBLEM’S FROM FORNICATING AS IT APPLIES TO ADULTERY. (PROVERBS 6:26-29)
“For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life. Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? So he that goeth in to neighbour’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent.”
A. There Will Be Serious Social Problems Resulting in Lost Treasures. (Proverbs 6:26; 33; 35; 7:27)
1. Problems involving who you are (V. 26) “hunt for the precious life”. (TREASURE OF A GOOD NAME)
I am very concerned when I meet a person that does not care about his name. The Bible tells us that: “A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold.” (Proverbs 22:1) Fornication and adultery can tear your name down in a hurry (if you have a good name). Which would you prefer, a good name or great riches?
2. Problems involving who you know. (V.33) “a wound and dishonor shall he get…” (TREASURE OF HAVING GOOD FRIENDS)
I have witnessed the tragedy of seeing this sin destroy the best of friends. I have witnessed men stealing their best friend’s wife and women stealing their best friend’s husband. Keep your marriage the way God intended it and you can keep your friends and your wife! The dishonor will be recognized acutely in the community that you live and will also reach way beyond the boundaries of your neighborhood.
3. Problems involving conflict. (V. 35) “He will not regard any ransom” (TREASURE OF HAVING A PEACE OF MIND)
I have seen the ongoing effects of fornication on a person’s life. The person that commits the sin against his marriage will carry certain feelings to his grave. He will try to escape the emotional feelings and the guilt only to find that it keeps popping back up. It may be an acquaintance that he sees on the street, and old class mate and even a person that he ministered with or to. God will forgive him, but he still has great difficulty in forgetting his own sin. Also, those who know the person that committed this sin will think about it long after the event. David was a man after God’s own heart, yet we still bring up his sin with Bathsheba that resulted in the death of Uriah.
4. Problems involving where you live. (7:27) “Her house is the way to hell” (TREASURE OF A HAPPY HOME)
Many homes have been destroyed and damaged by this terrible sin. I have wept with people who have been greatly hurt. It hurts me to even preach this sermon, but it is so necessary. Many years ago, I had a lady tell me as we were weeping that it would have been easier to be told that her husband had been killed in a wreck rather than to hear that her marriage had been killed. She said, “At least I would have gone on believing that he still loved me…” If you have a happy home, then consider it a valuable treasure.
Note: for each of the above “treasures” I use an object lesson. I will have a treasure chest sitting near my pulpit and at each mention of the above treasures, I will pull out of the treasure chest a string of pearls and hold the pearls up and say something like this: “This is the treasure of a good name”. After telling about this lost treasure, I will drop it into a trash can and go to the next treasure… It will have a most sobering effect, God willing.
B. There Will Be Serious Spiritual Problems Resulting In the Lost Treasures That Brings One to “a piece of bread”. (I call the “piece of bread”, bread crumbs and pull out of the treasure chest pieces of crusted bread and drop them into the trash)
1. The Crumbs of Suffering…
2. The Crumbs of Sorrow…
3. The Crumbs of Separation…
4. The Crumbs of Lost Service…
5. The Crumbs of the Sober Reality of what has really happened to one’s home and marriage.
Note: This next section, which tells how to protect your marriage against this sin, will be preached on Sunday night…
III. THE PROTECTION AGAINST FORNICATION AS IT APPLIES TO ADULTERY (Selected Scriptures)
A. Men Beware of Her Fleshly Beauty (Proverbs 6:25a; 7:8-10) “Lust not after her beauty in thine heart…”
The beauty of a woman can captivate you, piercing your heart as it does, with the bitterness of wormwood (Proverbs 5:4). “But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.”
1. Her Path to avoid (Proverbs 7:8-10)
The victim had allowed himself to be attracted to her beauty and discovered where she lived. While doing so, either by arrangement or accident, he came upon her and was taken by her: “Passing through the street near her corner, and he went the way to her house, In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night: And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.”
2. Her Persuasion to abhor (Proverbs 7:11-22)
The harlot persuades him with 1. Her attire (Vv. 16, 17); 2. Her argument (v. 21); 3. Her appeal (V. 22). She even perfumed her bed to make it more appealing. Usually the event of adultery takes a period of time and yet in just a moment of time, one can lose everything that is of value. Beware of her fleshly beauty and the many ways that she will attempt to communicate her fleshly beauty unto you.
B. Men Beware of Her Fooling Eyes (Proverbs 7:25b) “neither let her take thee with her eyelids.”
1. The Luring Eyes…
There is something powerfully attractive when the eyes are used to communicate the language of the heart. The only thing about this kind of attraction is that unless it is legitimately conveyed by the wife to “her” husband, it can be lethally dangerous. Years ago, I pulled into a convenience store, while on a hospital visit to a neighboring town, when a young lady’s eyes and mine met. I then understood the meaning of “letting her take thee with her eyelids”. I immediately made my purchase and got back into my car, reminding myself how easy that it would be to fall into the trap.
2. The Lustful Eyes…
I John 2:16, “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.”
C. Men Beware of Her Flattering Tongue (Proverbs 7:24b) “from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman.”
“With her much fair speech she caused him to yield, with the flattering of her lips she forced him.” (Proverbs 7:21)
1. There is poison in that kind of tongue… (Proverbs 5:3,4) “For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.”
These are powerful words of warning to protect one from being captured by the “strange woman’s” speech. Words can bring both inspiration and devastation…
2. There is peril in that kind of tongue… (Proverbs 5:6) “Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.”
Men, there is someone out there that can say it “just right”. That person can tell you things that will capture your heart if you yield to it. Don’t say that it cannot happen. I know of a well known preacher from many years back who succumbed to what was described as “telephone sex”. He loved hearing the things that the “strange woman” would tell him on the other line. It led to the destruction of his ministry and his home. Out of miserable frustration and depression, he went and stood over his father’s grave and pointed a gun towards his body and then pulled the trigger. So ended his life, reminding us of the verse that says, “Her house is the way to hell, going down to the chambers of death.” (Proverbs 7:27)
D. Men Beware of the Fatal Touch (Proverbs 7:13) “So she caught him, and kissed him,”
In 1 Corinthians 7:1 we are reminded: “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.”
1. The touch can be delightful…
There is much “electricity” in the inappropriate touch. The passionate fires can be kindled in just a light touch. It only takes a “spark to get a fire going”. Again, I learned the truth of this nearly 35 years ago. I had just married and was working with the Burroughs Corporation on their computers. I faced something that could have challenged my marriage. I went to service a computer in a place that had a temporary setup and everything was cramped. The computer operator was a very attractive young lady and would walk by me getting to her desk. On several occasions she would brush against me and I felt the electricity that was there and at the same time heard the Holy Spirit speaking a warning to my heart. From then on, when she would come through, I would get up and move out of her way… Men BEWARE of the fatal touch!
2. The touch can be deadly… “What starts with a touch may end with a tomb”.
CONCLUSION: This parity between husband and wife was insisted on by early Christian writers such as Lactantius, who declared: "For he is equally an adulterer in the sight of God and impure, who, having thrown off the yoke, wantons in strange pleasure either with a free woman or a slave. But as a woman is bound by the bonds of chastity not to desire any other man, so let the husband be bound by the same law, since God has joined together the husband and the wife in the union of one body." Since God has joined our marriages, we should consider the ongoing sacredness of our union and never compromise it, God being our helper…
