THE BIBLICAL FAMILY: The Purpose & Design of Marriage
Gen 2:18-25
INTRODUCTION:
A. Psalm 127:1 Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
1. Like never before in the history of America, our families are under attack.
2. And so the institution of marriage, which establishes the family, has become a big target.
3. If you change the make-up and order of the family which is the basic unit of society and the church you change the direction of the nation.
4. Therefore the family is of critical importance.
B. We often fear terrorism, crime, or a major disease and yet are complacent when it comes to our families.
1. Why are our families splintering? Why is the divorce rate at 50%?
a. Consider this, families falling apart is not new.
b. We see Satan attacking the home and the family way back in the Garden of Eden.
c. There we see Adam & Eve disobeying God & then their son Cain getting angry and killing his brother Abel.
d. The Christian has three enemies the Bible speaks about - The World system, our old fleshly nature, and Satan himself.
e. Satan is out to destroy us, our children and our home.
1) God tells us in Eph 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
2) With this in mind, Andreas Kostenberger writes in God, Marriage and Family, Ultimately, we human beings, whether we realize it or not, are involved in a cosmic spiritual battle that pits God against Satan, with marriage and the family serving as a key area in which spiritual and cultural battles are fought.
2. How’s your family this morning?
a. Strong, vibrant, standing in good relationships with love?
b. Or is it filled with anger, yelling, crying and desperation?
3. Our families today are under attack like never before, it’s time to reclaim our homes for Christ.
4. And it is battle we cannot afford to loose – the stakes are high.
C. When it comes to the subject of the family many today are shallow, surface Christians, not knowing God’s Word and ignorant of our adversaries’ devices or deceived and walking in pride blind to the truth.
1. Living a facade, a double agent lifestyle, trying to look good on the outside while their homes disintegrate.
2. They become discouraged, defeated and confused, not knowing what to do.
3. My desire is that this series on the family will help to eradicate that!
4. So we will start at the beginning: Genesis 2:18-25 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. [19] And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. [20] And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. [21] And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; [22] And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. [23] And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. [24] Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. [25] And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
a. Beginning with this passage I want to look at two things
1) God’s Purpose for Marriage
2) God’s Design of Marriage
b. May God give us insight into this critical issue that is at the foundation of our churches & nations and grant us the wisdom and strength to stand for what is biblically right.
PRAY
Lets begin by taking a look at
I. GOD’S PURPOSE FOR MARRIAGE: Gen 2:18-23
A. Lets read Genesis 2:18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
1. You don’t like that translation! OK
a. Amplified Bible: Now the Lord God said, It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him.
b. NIV: The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
c. NASB: Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."
d. Holman Christian Standard Bible: Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is like him."
e. Contemporary English Version: The LORD God said, "It isn’t good for the man to live alone. I need to make a suitable partner for him."
f. English Standard Version: Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him."
g. Good News Bible: Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to live alone. I will make a suitable companion to help him."
2. .So what was the purpose that God put man to sleep, took a rib, and formed woman?
3. What do all these translations have in common” helper, help meet, companion
4. COMPANIONSHIP! To provide a completer for Adam.
B. As God looked upon Adam, he said it was not good that he was alone
1. Genesis 2:19-20 And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. [20] And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
2. Having looked at and named all the animals there was not found one that was like Adam.
a. I believe – personal idea – that the naming of the animals was not a test of Adams creative abilities, but rather an opportunity for Adam to see that there was indeed none like him – this in turn, would do two things
b. First, when God created Eve, there would be an instant bonding with the one God supplied for him - Genesis 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
c. And second, there would a grateful recognition to God for providing such a one unto him.
3. God’s purpose for bring man and woman together was to provide companionship – they were to become one entity – they should be one flesh.
C. Just one other quick note – when God constituted marriage in Genesis 2 it had nothing to do with love – the feeling of love – it was an act of God that necessitated a commitment of Adam to Eve, and vise versa
1. The idea of marring for “LOVE” is a relatively new thing brought about by western culture.
2. For the first 4, maybe even 5 thousand years marriages were arranged and the idea of “love” was cultivated afterwards.
3. The reason marriage worked in that environment was that both parties knew that the primary purpose of marriage was for companionship.
So with the purpose established lets look at
II. GOD’S DESIGN OF MARRIAGE
A. Let us first look at the Manner in which God intended it to take place
1. It is a shame that I have to begin with this but when God established marriage he did so in the context of one man and one woman.
a. This is the biblical standard.
b. Since God established marriage as between a man and a woman, no one has the right to redefine it except Him and He is not going to do so.
c. God give us a complete account as to how He views homosexual and lesbian relationships in Romans 1:8-32.
d. So marriage was to be between a man and a woman
2. With this came the necessity for a leaving and cleaving: Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
a. The leaving and cleaving principle is very important
b. Even though Adam and Eve were the first two persons, and therefore had know one to leave on earth God gave a dynamic piece of information to us
c. The idea being that when two come together in marriage they are to leave their former homes. This is important for at least two reasons
1) First, they must be separated from former lines of authority, in order that
2) Secondly they may establish their own family authority.
d. The cleaving is important because they need to realize that it is not an option to go running home to mom and dad every time things don’t go well!
e. The couple has made a conscience decision to leave one home to establish another.
3. The leaving and cleaving is necessary if God’s order in the family is going to be established – that being the head of the home is the husband
a. Ephesians 5:23-30 makes this perfectly clear where it states that the husband is the head of the house (family)
b. And directly following this pronouncement by God we read, Eph 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
c. Mommy and Daddy are no longer the authority figures – Hubby is!
1) Husbands should not be relying on Mom and Dad to tell them what to do, nor should wives be running to their moms and dads to get assenting or dissenting opinions.
2) They might seek counsel from either or both sets of parents but the husband is the one who needs to make the decision.
4. Both the leaving and cleaving principle and biblical order are necessary if Life-long Permanency is to be established
a. In Adam and Eves case it was a union that was to be in place from the time God brought them together.
b. After the fall it was to be maintained unto “death do they part”
c. This is seen from our Lord’s words found in Matthew 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
5. So we have seen that God designed the family in a manner which is to begin with the union of a man and a woman who leave their respective families to join in a life long companionship with the husband as the head of the new family.
Now there is one last thing I want us to look at concerning the way God designed Marriage and that is
B. The Responsibilities Within Marriage, Genesis 1:27-28 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. [28] And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Here we see two basic responsibilities within the relationship
1. To procreate – that is to have children.
a. Though procreation can take place outside of marriage, God’s intent and desire is that it take place within the context of marriage, thus providing for a stable atmosphere to raise those children.
b. Note this passage found in Malachi 2:14-15 God was displeased with the Israelites for divorcing their wives and states, …the Lord hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. [15] And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.
c. It is not enough to populate the earth, God wants a godly seed, and that can only come from a godly entity – a godly family
d. A couple needs to think hard about not having children – what is the purpose for not having them? Remember we are to do all things for the glory of God.
2. Secondly God gave the first couple the responsibility to be good stewards of all that he had created – this would include children.
a. We are to use all the Lord has given to us to bring glory to his name and we are to raise children to bring glory to His name as well.
b. Note Adam was given a helper – God never intended him to it alone.
c. God told Adam and Eve to subdue and control the earth: this refers to every aspect: biologically, scientifically, technologically, and etc.
3. With few exceptions, covered by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7, we are to marry, have children and use the resources God has given Him for His glory.
CONCLUSION:
1. The biblical family is established by the uniting of two people, a man and a woman, in a life long covenant of companionship having left their former families, where in they can bring up godly off-spring and be good stewards of God’s creation.
2. This is the ideal, but unfortunately we do not live in an ideal setting – this world is corrupt and man’s evil heart has corrupted even the most basic of God’s creation.
a. This morning, if you are in a position to fulfill God’s design and manner for the family, please do not stray from it.
b. If you are having problems, work it out, if you are saved you have the power and resources to just that, but you will have to humble yourselves and do it God’s way.
3. If this ideal is not possible for you, realize God still loves you as much as anyone and He is a great God who can and does provide second chances.
- Read His word and see what His will is for you – and do it!
4. Let’s take the church back to the biblical understanding of the family and do all that is in our power, individually and corporately, to produce biblically strong families for the glory of God!
REMEMBER: Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it:… Psalm 127:1
Special thanks - Intro is from Pastor Dave Martin, Cross Creek Community Church: Message "The Family is Under Attack" SermonCentral.com
