Building Relationships #3
A Guide to “Godly Friends” and How to Treat Others
Proverbs 17:17; Matthew 22:37-39
The past two weeks we have studied relationships. The most important relationship that you and I can have in our life is a “Relationship” with God. In other words, knowing Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior in a Personal, Intimate way. I came to know Christ in that manner as a young child when I trusted Him as my Lord and Savior. Last week, we studied the importance of having God at the center of our family relationships, from husband to wife to children. This morning, we take the next step in learning how to build Godly relationships. We endeavor into looking at our friends and friendships.
Today, let’s notice the characteristics of Godly Friends and how to treat one another as God would have us to. Finally, we will look at the ultimate friend and perform a self-examination of whether we know that ultimate friend.
TEXT
Notice the word “love”. Love was recognized in both passages as the main key cog to a successful relationship. Think about this:
Love God with our everything
Love Our Neighbors as ourselves
Agape Love: unconditional love. Love, regardless of what happens.
Love will endure the test of time – Look at the qualities of LOVE
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
I. What is a Godly Friend
a. Someone who is loyal
i. Proverbs 17:17
1. “A friend loves at all times”
ii. Proverbs 18:24
1. “There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother”
• David and Jonathan (read their story in 1 Samuel). Jonathan was loyal to David. David was loyal to Jonathan. It went both ways.
b. Someone who (knows how to keep a confidence TRUSTWORTHY)
i. Proverbs 25:9-10
1. “If you argue your case with a neighbor, do not betray another man’s confidence, or he who hears it may shame you and you will never lose your bad reputation”
ii. Person does not air dirty laundry
iii. Person does not Gossip.
1. Gossip will ruin a friendship
a. Proverbs 16:28
i. “A forward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends”
2. Gossip will ruin a reputation
3. Gossip will ruin and destroy a life if uncontrolled.
c. Someone who knows how to control their tongue
i. Proverbs 11:9
1. “With his mouth the godless destroys his neighbor, but through knowledge the righteous escape”
ii. Proverbs 11:12
1. “A man of understanding holds his tongue”
• If someone talks falsely of you, talk to him in private about the matter
• Don’t seek revenge upon that person.
o You’ll hurt that person and you’ll hurt yourself!
o “Vingeange is the Lord’s and He will repay”
• Beware of people who cause you trouble and then say “I was only kidding”
o Proverbs 26:28
“A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin.”
d. Someone who is honest with you
i. True friendship cannot be built upon deceit, but upon total honesty.
1. Relationship between a husband and wife
a. Without honesty, distrust develops then divorce happens.
2. Relationship between parent/child
3. Relationship with friends
ii. Proverbs 27:6
1. “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”
iii. Ephesians 4:15
1. “Speak the truth in love”
a. Spirit can use truth and love to build character
b. Devil can use lies to destroy
Dr. Warren Wiersbe adds to this thought process:
“We must never take our friends for granted and thing that they will immediately forgive our offenses, even though forgiveness is the right thing for Christians. It’s strange but true that some of God’s people will forgive offenses from unbelievers that they would never forgive if a Christian friend committed them. It takes a diamond to cut a diamond, and some Christians have a way of putting up defenses that even the church can’t break through”
iv. When forgiveness is an issue; refer to Matthew 18:15-25
e. Someone who counsels and encourages you
i. Proverbs 27:17
1. “As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpen’s the countenance of his friend.”
ii. We must build one another up. Even in the bad times of life when nothing is going well. A friend is there to either pat you on the back or give you a swift kick.
f. Someone who is sensitive to individual’s needs
i. Do you know if your friend is a believer or an unbeliever?
1. Have you ever trusted Jesus as your Lord and Savior?
ii. Do you know what they are going through at the present time?
1. Family Life
2. Job Situation
3. Church Situation
iii. Do you know what you can do to help them get through?
1. Biblical teaching
2. Personal Advice/Counseling
It all leads us back to our secondary text: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul” then “Love thy neighbor as you love yourself.”
Have you been a good friend to your acquaintances? Have you been a friend that is loving, loyal, trustworthy, knows when to keep their mouths shut, honest, an encourager, and sensitive?
I haven’t always been. There have been times that I have taken matters into my own hands and destroyed friendships due to my own ignorance. If you’re honest, you’ve done the same. However, I have given you a pattern this morning of what it takes to be a Godly friend. But, I close with an example of the ultimate friend for your life.
II. The Ultimate Friend
a. John 15:13
i. Jesus Christ came to this earth
1. Lived the sinless life
2. Taught the Word of God in simple parables so that men and women, boys and girls could understand the power of God and apply it to their lives
3. Died upon the Cross of Calvary to pay the sin debt of the entire world. My sin debt is bad enough, but think of the entire world!
4. Defeated hell and the grave by resurrecting
5. Ascended into heaven to prepare a place for those who believe!
b. No Greater love that Jesus for each one of us today.
c. No Greater example than Jesus for each one of us today.
Have you been a friend to Jesus?
Have you been a friend to Others?
Today is the day to turn things around – Don’t turn your back on God or others today!
