LIFE IS AN ATTITUDE – PICK A GOOD ONE
Replace A Complaining Attitude
Sunday January 21, 2007
Scripture Text: Romans 12:1-2
Numbers 11:1-3
Intro.
A. We are launching today into a brand new sermon series that will take us all the way to Easter Sunday. As you can see this is a series on the topic of attitudes. Now you may be wondering “Why are we going to spend the next ten weeks talking about attitudes?” Well first and foremost we are doing this because the bible speaks a lot about the subject of our attitudes and if the bible has much to say on a topic then we obviously have much we need to learn about this issue. The second reason we are going to be talking about attitudes for ten weeks is totally selfish. That reason is that “I need help with my attitude! Now I know that will be reason for many of you to shout “Amen” “Hallelujah” and “Praise God” but let’s be honest shall we? Most of you sitting here today need help with your attitudes as well, DON’T YOU?
1. I believe that one of the greatest hindrances and obstacles to greater effectiveness in my life is this one thing “Attitude”. I keep falling back on what my pastor in Bible College told me when I first began pastoring and I told him I didn’t know what to preach about. He told me to preach to myself and I would be amazed at how many need the same help that I do. Now if you are sitting here today and you are saying to yourself, “I don’t need help with my attitude.” “This series is going to be meaningless to me.” I might suggest that you take a little closer look at yourself because my experience has shown me that often times the person who says, “I don’t need help.” Is the person who actually needs the most help.
B. Let’s begin with a definition of what an attitude is so that we are at least all on the same page when we talk about this subject. The dictionary tells us and I am paraphrasing here, that an “Attitude is an inner feeling expressed by an outward behavior.” Here is how Jesus said it in Luke 6:45 NIV The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.
1. Pastor and speaker John Maxwell in his book “The Winning Attitude” defined attitude this way:
It is the “advanced man” of our true selves.
Its roots are inward but its fruit is outward.
It is our best friend or worst enemy.
It is more honest and consistent than our words.
It is an outward look based on past experiences.
It is a thing that draws people to us or repels them.
It is never content until it is expressed.
It is the librarian of our past.
It is the speaker of our present.
It is the prophet of our future.
C. Now let’s talk for a few minutes about the importance of our attitudes.
1. It has been said that “Attitude is everything”. We I am not going to tell you that attitude is everything because I don’t think that will square with the scriptures. What I mean by this is that there are some people who believe we can just “Think” our way out of our troubles or problems. If we just think “Happy Thoughts” everything will be OK. Well I can’t say I believe that, but I will tell you what I do believe and what I do believe is that attitude effects everything. My attitude affects my relationship with my wife. Just ask her if you don’t believe me. My attitude affects my relationship with my kids. My attitude affects my job. My attitude affects my relationship with God.
2. [] How many times have we seen in sports where a professional baseball or football team that is loaded with talent and is paying millions of dollars for that talent and yet the team continues to lose games? Why does that happen? More often than not it is attitude. It is not that the team does not have the talent to win it is that they do not have the attitude to win. Maybe they have lost so many times that their attitude is one that says, “We are destined to lose no matter what we do.” Here is what Football coach Lou Holtz said about attitude; Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it. The Figure Skater Scott Hamilton said The only disability in life is a bad attitude.
3. [] On the instrument panel of an airplane there are a number of different gauges, but did you know that one of those gauges is called the “attitude gauge”? What the attitude gauge does is it tells the pilot the planes position in relation to the horizon. If the plane is pointed below the horizon it is in a “Nose-down” attitude. If the plane is pointed in a position above the horizon it is in what is called the “Nose-high”. I think you can guess what is happening to the plane in each of these positions. Either we are headed for the horizon or we are headed for the ground and it all depends on our attitude.
D. Now I know I am taking a little more time here than usual for an introduction to a sermon but there are some basic principles we need to get a handle on before we can move further into this topic. So let me share one more thing with you before we explore today’s attitude to avoid. “Does God really care about my attitude?” That’s a good question because if my attitude does not affect my relationship with God then I have announced to you a ten week waste of time. Obviously I believe that God cares a great deal about out attitude otherwise He would not have so much to say about attitudes to us. What we will be doing over these next ten weeks is looking at one bad attitude that we see portrayed in the Old Testament and then we will be looking at the good attitude that needs to be replaced by the bad from the New Testament. The basis for why we feel our attitudes are very important comes from a story some of you are probably familiar with it is the story of the Exodus. Not so much the actual exodus from Egypt but what happens after the children of Israel cross the Red Sea and then head for the Promise Land. They had spent some time at Mt Sinai where God had given them laws and regulations about how to live and then from there they set out for the Promise Land. It took them just three months to get to the boarder but as you may know the children of Israel refused to enter into the land and the result was that they spent another 40 years wandering in the desert waiting for a whole generation to pass away before they could come back to this point and enter into God’s promise for them.
1. Now think about this, what should have taken three months to do took 40 YEARS and during that forty years a whole generation of people had to pass away. Why did i6t take 40 years to complete a three month assignment? Why did a whole generation of people die before this could take place? One word, ATTITUDE!
2. Now you might ask, “Well what does this have to do with us in 2007? Because we believe that God is a God of mercy and grace and so we don’t think He would do something like this today.” Well let’s see what the bible tells us about how we ought to feel about attitudes today. Turn with me if you would to 1 Corinthians 10:1-13 (read). The bible is very clear isn’t it? God said that what was written down before is to serve as an example to us today that we would not do what those people did. Why would God say this if attitudes were not as important to Him today as they were then? Obviously attitude as still very important and so we need to learn what attitudes to avoid and what attitudes to embrace and that will be our focus of discussion for these next ten weeks.
Trans. Today we begin with the first bad attitude that God wants us to replace which the attitude of complaining. As the scripture shows us today, Complaining is the attitude of the multitude.
I. COMPLAINING IS THE ATTITUDE OF THE MULTITUDE.
I do not know of a single person that does not struggle with the attitude of complaining. In fact if you do not feel that complaining is a problem you ever have to combat then I have news for you, you have an even bigger problem you have a problem with honesty.
A. What Is Complaining?
1. As I said before complaining is an issue that all of us have to deal with. Now I will grant you that some of us are more proficient at this than others but nevertheless it is still something all of us have to deal with at some time or another.
2. What we also see here in these first three verses of Numbers 11 is what I said a moment ago as we asked the question “Does God really care about my attitude?” The answer as these verses vividly point out is “Yes” God cares deeply about our attitudes because our attitudes can be destructive. The Bible tells us that after these people began to complain God’s anger was aroused and he sent a fire among them. How many of you know that it is not a good thing to have God angry with us? And consider this, Why was God angry? Was it because someone was murdered? Was it because someone was stealing things? NO, God was angry because the people were complaining.
B. Complaining Is A Choice.
1. Here is something you need to remember about attitudes, “Attitudes don’t choose us, we chose them.” I may have a lot of reasons for or excuses for my bad attitude but the bottom line is that I am the one making the decision to have this attitude. Now I hate to destroy a perfectly good excuse but we also cannot blame our attitudes on our backgrounds.
2. Attitudes are not inherited. Won’t it be great if I could say, “Well I am a complainer because my parents were complainers?” Or how about his, “I don’t like the fact that I am always complaining but it is just in my genes. I come from long line of complainers.” There is no complaining gene in any of our gene pools.
3. The fact of the matter is that our attitudes are developed over a long period of time. How many of you know that bad attitudes are hard to change? If you know that to be true say “Amen”. Do you know why they are so hard to change? Because they were forged over a long period of time and they many times are seen by us as normal and acceptable but they are not. The bad news here as well is that because they took time to develop they will also take time to undevelop. This is a ten week series but if you have a problem with complaining I have to be honest and tell you that it will most likely take you much more than ten weeks to change that attitude.
Trans. Here is the truth about complaining.
II. THE TRUTH ABOUT COMPLAINING.
A. Complaining Is Not An Insolated Act.
1. Yes you heard me correctly, I said that complaining is not an insulted act. What I mean by that is that complaining is not something that affects just you although it certainly does affect you. Think about the effect that complaining has on you personally. What happens to you when you complain? Does complaining make you happy? Do you find that you complain because it brings you great joy? I sincerely doubt it. I think our experience shows us that complaining people are miserable people. Does complaining lead to constructive change in whatever the situation is that we are complaining about? I have to be hones and tell you that when people come to me complaining I am not likely to respond positively to their complaints. Complaining has never inspired me to make meaningful changes. I have had a policy on my Church Boards fro quite a few years and that policy is this. No one is allowed to bring a complaint (or as we prefer to call it “a concern) from someone unless they can tell us the name of the person who shared the complaint with them. My reasoning is quite simple. Often times my experience has shown me that the same people tend to complain. Now their complaint maybe legitimate but knowing that they are usually complaining gives better perspective on what is being shared with us. ** Now please hold on for a few minutes because in just a few minutes I will define what I see complaining to be.
2. Complaining not only affects me but it affects others as well. Look with me at Numbers 13:31-14:1-2 (read). Did you notice what happened when just ten of the twelve said this can’t be done? It says that ALL THE PEOPLE began to cry and then they grumbled which is basically the same thing as saying that they complained. Have you ever noticed how much easier it is for people to catch a bad attitude than it is for them to catch a good attitude?
3. Here is something that I think is reason enough for us to do whatever we can to change our attitude of complaining. Our complaining affects God also. [] As a parent have you ever wanted to do something for one of your children, maybe you had promised to take them some place like Disneyland but because they chose to do something you had told them not to do you had to take away that privilege? It made you sad didn’t it? God wanted nothing more than to bless the lives of His people but because they chose to act in disobedience they had to receive God’s punishment instead of God’s blessing. I think it broke the heart of God to have them wander in the desert for 40 years before they could inherit His promise.
Trans. Now let me do something that I think is critical to our discussion here and that is to define criticism as I see it. Are we complaining every time we say something negative? If that were the case I am afraid we would all be in deep trouble. So let’s se just what it means to complain in the way that angers God.
A. Complaining Defined.
1. Complaining is negative talk about things that are not wrong. That is a very critical point. To complain is to talk negatively about things that are not wrong. There are things that I don’t like things that are not my style or preference but they are not wrong they are just not for me. Now let me be very clear here. I am not telling you that you may never say a negative word about something you don’t like. I think that is setting an impossible goal. There are things I don’t like that are not wrong and yet I can express my dislike for whatever that is. There are things that go on in the political arena that I don’t like but are not necessarily wrong and I express my dissatisfaction with those things. What we are talking about here is an ongoing pattern of negative talk about things that not wrong. Remember the context of this scripture. These people were complaining about the way God was or was not doing things in their lives. It was something that was ongoing and constant and God made it clear that this was wrong. We have to be very honest here and admit that this sort of complaining goes on in churches an awfully lot. We hear people who are going on and on about things they don’t like and it is not really because that thing is wrong it is because it is not what we are use to our not the way it has always been done. If that dissatisfaction continues it is now complaining and God condemns it.
2. Secondly complaining is talking but doing nothing. I think this is one of the ways that true complaining really shows itself. We have all heard people who go on and on about things they don’t like but what are they doing to make things different? What are their solutions to the problem they see? Usually there isn’t one because let’s be honest, it is a whole lot easier to complain than it is to get my hands dirty and help make a change. I hear people all the time complaining about the political situation and yet when I ask these people if they vote they say “no”. Well that is talking but doing nothing and that my friend is complaining. If you are not going to do something to make the situation better then be quiet. Where’s your button?
3. Thirdly complaining involves circumstances not people. This is important because we are going to deal with negative talk about people later on. When our complaints focus on people it is criticism but when the focus is things it is complaining.
Trans. What is the bottom line of all of this? The bottom line is that God hates Complaining.
III. GOD HATES COMPLAINING.
I think that what we have read in just these first three verses makes this point very clear but we will see this even more as we continue on in this study. One thing that we need to remember as we think about our own complaining is that God is listening to us.
A. God Is Listening To Us.
1. Look with me at V.1 again (read). If you know about the travels of the children of Israel while they were in the desert then you know that God made His presence known to them by a cloud following them by day and fire by night. Yet despite the fact that God made Himself known to them they still had the nerve to complain about the way He was doing things. We do not have a cloud hovering over our heads during the day nor do we have the fire over us at night but God is with us nonetheless. In fact the Bible tells us that he resides in us through the Holy Spirit, yet how mindful are we of God’s presence and what He is listening to as we speak? Think about the conversations you had last week, how would any of those conversations changed if God were standing there beside you? Well the fact is that He was. Was He pleased with our conversations or did we disappoint Him by our negative complaints and criticisms?
Trans. You know its one thing to complain about the weather or about the traffic or about our jobs but let me show you what I think the worst kind of complaining is.
B. The Worst Kind Of Complaining.
1. What upset God was the fact that these people were complaining about the situation that God had them in. They were complaining about their hardships. Now consider the context of this scripture. To understand this you need to look at 10:11-13 (read). What this scripture tells us that after two years at the foot of Mt. Sinai getting directions for how they were to live as they entered into God’s promises it was now time to set out for the promise land. Then look at 10:33 (read). It was just three days after they set out to inherit God promise for them that they began to complain about their hardships. WAIT A MINUTE! What kind of hardships could they have had after just three days?!
2. Let me tell you what I think was going on here. I think what was happening here is why this was the kind of complaining that God hated. It was complaints over the fact that things had changed, that things were not comfortable for them like it had been. What they were doing now was not the way they had been doing things and they didn’t like the change. Listen, if you want to know what is really inside a person just make some changes for them. I guarantee you that you will discover just how mature they are. None of us likes change and yet change has to happen or we become stagnant and lifeless. Without change there can be no growth in our lives.
3. The bible tells us that they complained about their hardships. I think a key word here is “their”. The focus here is all about me, my needs, my concerns, my difficulties, my hardships. This is usually how complaining goes. People are talking about all their troubles and how hard life is for them. “Why do I have to go through this?” “Why is God doing this to me?” “Why is my life so hard?” Now I don’t want to throw you into some sort of guilt trip so let me remind you of something I said earlier. Complaining is something that I am constantly or habitually doing. I may say once in a while that things are hard for me. That life is really difficult. That is human and I think that to call that occasional talk complaining is set a standard that none of can reach. Once again as we will be seeing through out this study complaining is something that is done on a constant and continual basis.
4. We all have adversity in our lives and that is a good thing. What happens in the life of a child that gets every thing it wants? Does that child grow up strong and capable of dealing with the real world? Of course not. The Bible tells us in Hebrews12:6 that whom the Lord loves He disciplines. As you have heard me say on many occasions, “God will not take us where his grace will not keep us.” That just means that wherever God leads us He will go with us and provide whatever strength we need to handle the adversities that come our way. The main point here is that if I am truly a child of God then I should not be complaining about what God is doing in my life, even it seems that I am in a hardship at this time. If I am His then He knows exactly what is going on and how to help me through if I will only trust and obey.
LIFE APPLICATION
A. Let’s take a moment here to reflect about what we have learned so far.
1. The first thing I would ask you is this “Are you a complainer?” Based on what you know now about complaining do you fit this definition? Don’t be too quick to answer that because if complaining has become a habit to you then you may not even see it right away. Do you find yourself talking negatively about things that are not wrong? Are you consistently talking negatively about things and then not doing anything to help or make improvements? If so then you have a problem with the attitude of complaining.
2. What are the consequences you are experiencing right now as a result of your complaining attitude? The children of Israel spent forty years wandering in the desert because of their complaining. Are you in the desert spiritually right now? Do you find that your life is lacking in joy and fulfillment? Do the things of God like reading your bible or prayer or worship excite you or are these things just sort of “Ho Hum” to you? If the things of God are a bore to you it is a sure sign that you are in the wilderness.
3. So then the last question has to be, “Do you really want to change?” Do you want to get out of the wilderness and back into the land of God’s promise? You need to understand that God can and wants to forgive the attitude of complaining in you right now, but the road to full recovery will take some time. You can begin the process of returning home right now. Repentance means to make an about face, to go in a new direction. If we are going to exit the desert then we need to turn around and start heading in the right direction. That is what we do when we repent of our sins and ask God to forgive us. I believe that the attitude of complaining is a sin. It is not a fault or character flaw it is sin and because it is we must repent of that sin and start moving in a new direction away from complaining and into an attitude of gratitude which I will talk to you about next week.
