Is It I? – A Good Friday Meditation
"When evening had come, He sat down with the twelve. Now as they were eating, He said, "Assuredly, I say to you, one of you will betray Me." And they were exceedingly sorrowful, and each of them began to say to Him, "Lord, is it I?" Matthew 26:20-22 (NKJV)
It was on Friday that He made the statement. You know the statement that I’m talking about – the statement that pierced us to the heart. The one that made each of us examine ourselves. The one that had us look deep into our soul. The one that made us ask the question – “Is it I Lord?”
He had made statements before – statements that had shocked us – statements that had made us laugh – statements that had pushed our faith – but this statement was different.
He said, “I assure you: One of you will betray Me!” John 13:21 (HCSB)
He had spoken in stories. Parables. Sometimes they were funny. They were different from anything I had heard before. They always made me think. They had some hidden meaning. But this statement was different – it was much more direct! He said it to the twelve of us – one of us eating with Him. “One of YOU will betray Me.” That’s when the question started – “Is it I Lord?”
He knew the hearts of men. He knew just the right words to say and when to say them. He didn’t beat around the bush when it came to spiritual issues but He always got to the meat of issue. He seemed to have a special gift when it came to knowing where people stood spiritually. All of us seemed to be transparent when we came into His presence. Perhaps that’s why it bothered us so. “One of YOU” – was one of us. And one of us will do this deed.
We all felt naked when He said it. Did we think that we could hide from Him? Did we think that somehow we were immune to His spiritual insight? Did we thing that just because we had been traveling with Him for these past three years that He would not expose us at some point? Now - at this moment we knew we were not immune to His exposure. Now we know we had been found out. With one statement He exposed us all. With one statement He got us asking the question – “Is it I?”
I remember reading in the book of Job long ago a verse that said – “Look, I know your thoughts, the schemes you would wrong me with.” Job 21:27 (HCSB) That verse rushed quickly to my mind. Could this be a prophecy for Jesus? Could this be a statement for this exact night? Could He somehow foresee this coming? One will betray Him – which one? “Is it I?”
I could say that it’s in my blood. It’s a family tradition. My family has always been this way – self-centered you know? Adam and Eve were dissatisfied with what God had given them – they wanted more – and so they ate of the tree. Cain wanted more attention from God so he killed Able. Lot wanted the better land so he moved toward Sodom. David wanted Bathsheba so he took her even though she was already married. And now – tonight He tells us that one of us will betray Him. “Is it I?”
I know that I am not above such a thing – even though I pretend I’m not. I have worn my fig leaf well – we all have. But I also know that when I get something – I want more and more and more. When I do not have – I fret and grow impatient. I am always looking out for myself – looking out for number one. And when someone wrongs me I always want even more - I want to get even. I always want to win. I always want to be on top. Is it any wonder that I now ask the question – “Is it I?” “Is it I?”
