Conlict of the mind
The challenge to keep your mind pure is a battle that many Christian men and women struggle with. This is particularly in the area of lust and pornography. This is an area that has caused many great men and women of God to fall. Only recently, Ted Haggard, the founder and pastor of a 14,000 strong church in America had to resign because he had lost this battle with lust. Even David, a man described in the Bible as ‘a man after Gods own heart’, fell to the sin of lust.
I want to start this evening by defining what offends God and what doesn’t. What is sin, and what is sexual immorality? The Bible makes it clear that there are three aspects to every sin. Firstly, there is a sinful temptation or desire. Secondly there is our thought pattern, that is allowing ourselves to think about and dwell upon that sinful desire. Finally there are our actions.
Temptations Thoughts Actions
When it comes to sin, some people think that you only offend God by your actions. This was a common perception at the time of Jesus. The Pharisees taught against performing a sinful act, but anything less than actually committing that act was acceptable. Jesus makes it clear that this view is overly liberal. He says that it is not only a sin to commit murder, but it is also a sin simply to have hateful thoughts against you brother. In relation to sexual immorality, in Matthew 5:28 Jesus says, “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” NIV. Jesus makes it clear that we can sin against God not only by our actions, but also, by what we allow ourselves to think about.
On the other hand there are some Christians who beat themselves up because of their temptations. We live in bodies that have many desires. Desire is something that God created us to have. Desire is necessary in order to live. God created us with a desire to eat so that our bodies would be healthy. He created us with a desire for sex so that we might have children. Since the fall of Adam and Eve some of those desires have become sinful desires. Temptation comes when we have the opportunity to sin in a way that our natural bodies desire. In Matthew chapter four, Jesus has been fasting for forty days. His body would have desired food and so the devil comes along and tries to persuade Jesus to misuse his power in order to meet his desire. Jesus has a natural desire, and an opportunity to sin, and therefore He is tempted. Jesus faced not only this temptation but every temptation known to man.
Hebrews 4:15
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. NIV
Therefore we know that temptation is not sin. The Bible therefore makes it clear that we sin the moment we allow ourselves to dwell on those temptations. Let me put that into a practical situation.
Peter is a married man. He works in an office with several women. One of those women, named Amanda, is very attractive and a few years younger than Peter. Peter works next to Amanda and chats to her most days. Peter finds the woman very attractive and naturally wants to look at her chest and backside every time she walks into the room. Peter wants to stay faithful to his wife and resists the urges to look at her in this manner. After two weeks Peter stops resisting the urge, thinking to himself, ‘there is no harm in window shopping.’ Every time she walks into the room Peter looks at her and thinks about her in a sexual manner, but never makes any attempt to chat her up. A couple of months later Peter starts to realise that Amanda also finds him attractive and they begin ‘harmless flirting.’ At a Christmas party Peter and Amanda have a Christmas kiss that lasts a little longer than they originally intended. Within a few weeks Peter and Amanda are meeting regularly and are having sexual intercourse.
Question: At what point does Peter sin commit the sin of adultery?
Answer: Peter sins when he starts to look at Amanda in a sexual manner. Up to that point Peter is tempted but is resisting that temptation. After this point Peter is continuing and deepening the sin.
I want to look therefore at Biblical and practical steps that we can take to resist temptation, and avoid lust, whether it is with somebody that we meet or with a pornographic image.
This is an important subject because it will be a battle that many people in this room either have faced, are facing, or may face in the future. I want to talk about a double locking principal when it comes to resisting lustful thoughts. To illustrate the point I want to tell you about an embarrassing situation that happened to me recently.
About a month ago I went to visit some a friend called Miro. Miro’s wife was there as well as a mutual friend of ours. Three of them were sitting around the kitchen table, and I went to use their lavatory. I locked the door as usual and sat down. Now if you ever go to Miro’s house you will soon discover that Miro has a passion for books. Wherever you sit down at Miro’s house you will find a book next to the chair. The toilet is no exception. As I sat there minding my own business, I saw a book on the side called, ‘Every man’s battle.’ It is a book all about how to resist falling into sexual immorality. I was just reading about how to avoid leaving yourself exposed in vulnerable positions, when Adam, Miro’s 4 year old son, suddenly opened the toilet door and came walking in. In that short time I couldn’t think how to say shut the door in Slovak. I could see Miro, Marta and Wayne all sitting around the kitchen table, fortunately with their backs to me. I stood up and was using this book to cover my dignity. As you can imagine it was rather embarrassing.
The reason the situation had come about was because I didn’t realise that their bathroom door requires two turns to fully lock. I had only turned it once and so I had left myself vulnerable. It is the same when it comes to sexual temptation. We need to turn the key twice. I have discovered that there are two keys to resisting lustful thoughts. The first key is spiritual discipline, and the second key is physical discipline. A lot of Christians are vulnerable in this area and struggle because they only ever turn one key.
**Spiritual Discipline**
The first key is spiritual discipline.
2 Samuel 11
David and Bathsheba
1 In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.
2 One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful,
David fell to Bathsheba at a time when he should have been in battle. It was his duty as king to lead his army but instead he decided to have a break. He probably thought, ‘I have thought hard enough before, I will just have a little relax.’ It was at this time, after a long lie in, that David saw Bathsheba and it eventually led to his adultery.
I am not suggesting that we shouldn’t have relaxing times, but we should not relax spiritually. I know when I am busy preparing sermons, I am a lot more resistant to sinful thoughts. When I have had my morning’s devotion and prayer time, I find it a lot easier to push out from my mind and sinful thoughts, because my mind is full of thoughts about God instead. If I take time off from my devotional then I become vulnerable.
Secondly the more we spend time with God the more we fall in love with him. The more we love God the less likely we are to sin against him. The more that we realise what God did in order to free us from sin, the more of a hate it will give us for that sin.
Thirdly, we need to ask God for a further infilling of the Holy Spirit. Self control is actually a fruit of the Holy Spirit. The more we allow the Holy Spirit to operate in our lives the more God given self control we will possess.
Galations 5
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires.
Finally, use the word of God to battle the thoughts. When the devil tempted Jesus, Jesus fought the temptation by using the Word of God. Learn Bible scriptures that will assist you in this battle and say them to yourself every time. If you are somebody who struggles with internet porn, then have a screensaver that comes on regularly that contains a relevant scripture. Set an appropriate scripture as your background.
**Physical Discipline**
Just as important as our need for spiritual discipline is our need for physical discipline.
The first point on this is to learn to disciple your body on a daily basis.
1 Corinthians 9
24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.
25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 27No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.
Paul describes the Christian life as being like a runner who is running in a race. If you have ever trained for a race then you will know that it isn’t easy. It means getting up when you don’t feel like it. It means going out when it’s cold and wet. It means overcoming your body’s natural laziness.
When I worked in my last job I decided that I was going to get up for work early and cycle in. It was 30km each way. At first getting up early and going out in the cold was difficult. But after a while it became easier and easier. It is the same when you discipline yourself against lustful thoughts. You have to beat your body into submission.
I became a Christian at 15 and for some years struggled with lust. If I was driving my car and saw a good looking woman on the side of the road, who looked good from one direction, then I would have to turn and look to see what she looked like from the other side. I realised after a while that I was allowing myself to lust, and so decided that I wasn’t going to do that anymore. If I saw an attractive woman I would just look straight ahead and think about something else or pray. At first, I actually found that very difficult but now I hardly think about it. The more we discipline our bodies, and the longer that we do it for, the easier it eventually gets.
Secondly, if the temptation is too great then get out of the situation. This is exactly what Joseph did when Potiphar’s wife came on to him. Do what you need to do to reduce the temptation. If you have a problem with the internet, then don’t use it in your bedroom, at night, when you are on your own. If going to a certain gym means you are constantly faced with very attractive members of the opposite sex, and you know that it is a problem, then stop going and find somewhere else. One pastor, who pastors one of the world’s biggest church won’t go and preach anywhere unless he can either take his wife with him or a male friend. He does it so that he can avoid temptation. Jesus said ‘If your hand causes you to sin then cut it off.’ If you are putting yourself in a situation that makes you vulnerable to lustful thoughts, then get out of that situation.
Thirdly, make yourself accountable.
James 5
16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
After Ted Haggard fell he wrote a remorseful letter to his church. In that letter he stated that pride had prevented him from sharing his struggles with anybody else. It is important to find one or two people that you can pray with and be accountable to in this area. They must be spiritual, non judgemental, and should be of the same sex as yourself.
Conclusion
In order to completely destroy the power that lust can have over you it takes both of these keys. When I worked as a police officer I was once called to a domestic disturbance. I went with a colleague and got there to find a man standing over a woman who he had just beaten up. The guy was huge. When we tried to arrest him he immediately started to fight with us and after a hard struggle we eventually manage to get him in a cage in the back of the police riot van. The van was new. We had just had a new fleet of vehicles.
The police cell was a 30km drive from where we had arrested him, and so we made our way there. I sat in the front passenger seat of the van while my colleague drove. For almost the entire journey the man was kicking and punching the cage violently, and promising to torture and kill us when he gets out. All of a sudden it went very quiet. This isn’t unusual with prisoners who are drunk, a lot of the time they tire themselves out so much that they eventually fall asleep.
A couple of seconds later I suddenly hear a voice coming from right behind me saying ‘I’ve got you now!!!’ I turned around in horror to find that he had got out of the cage and was standing right behind us.
The reason that he was able to get out of the cage was because the cage had an inside door. It was shut but not locked, and his frantic kicking had managed to loosen it. The old riot vans didn’t have an inside door to the cage, and so it hadn’t occurred to me to lock it.
When we try to defend ourselves against lustful temptations this is sometimes what we do. We only lock the door from one side. Lust is a violent enemy, and unless we take every precaution, then we can put ourselves in danger. When I was in the van I thought I was nice and safe, but I didn’t realise the danger that I was in.
Many Christians search for a one off experience that is going to answer all of there challenges with lust. We have to remember that our battle against lust is both spiritual and physical. If we try to do it by one of these things alone then we leave ourselves vulnerable.
