What it Takes to Fix a Broken Relationship
1 Samuel 7:2-13
2 It was a long time, twenty years in all, that the ark remained at Kiriath Jearim, and all the people of Israel mourned and sought after the LORD.
3 And Samuel said to the whole house of Israel, "If you are returning to the LORD with all your hearts, then rid yourselves of the foreign gods and the Ashtoreths and commit yourselves to the LORD and serve him only, and he will deliver you out of the hand of the Philistines."
4 So the Israelites put away their Baals and Ashtoreths, and served the LORD only.
5 Then Samuel said, "Assemble all Israel at Mizpah and I will intercede with the LORD for you."
6 When they had assembled at Mizpah, they drew water and poured it out before the LORD. On that day they fasted and there they confessed, "We have sinned against the LORD." And Samuel was leader of Israel at Mizpah.
7 When the Philistines heard that Israel had assembled at Mizpah, the rulers of the Philistines came up to attack them. And when the Israelites heard of it, they were afraid because of the Philistines.
8 They said to Samuel, "Do not stop crying out to the LORD our God for us, that he may rescue us from the hand of the Philistines."
9 Then Samuel took a suckling lamb and offered it up as a whole burnt offering to the LORD. He cried out to the LORD on Israel’s behalf, and the LORD answered him.
10 While Samuel was sacrificing the burnt offering, the Philistines drew near to engage Israel in battle. But that day the LORD thundered with loud thunder against the Philistines and threw them into such a panic that they were routed before the Israelites.
11 The men of Israel rushed out of Mizpah and pursued the Philistines, slaughtering them along the way to a point below Beth Car.
12 Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."
13 So the Philistines were subdued and did not invade Israelite territory again. Throughout Samuel’s lifetime, the hand of the LORD was against the Philistines. (NIV)
Well, when we left off last week, the nation of Israel had just suffered an overwhelming defeat at the hands of the Philistines. Not only had they lost 34,000 soldiers, but they had also lost the Ark of the Covenant, which was home to the presence of God. It was the resting place of God. It was place where God would come down from heaven and meet with man. And so, the Ark of the Covenant not only represented the presence of God. It also represented the relationship between God and Israel. In fact, it was named for the relationship between God and Israel. It was called the Ark of the “Covenant.” Or, the Ark of the “Agreement” God made with Israel, and Israel made with God, on Mount Sinai. And so, the Ark was God’s reminder to Israel that He existed, and that He loved them, and that they had a special relationship with Him.
And so, when the Ark of the Covenant was captured by the Philistines, it sort of symbolized the condition of their relationship with God at the time.
You’ve gotta understand, when the Israelites lost the Ark of the Covenant, they did more than just lose a religious object. They didn’t just lose an important part of their history. They, in effect, lost their relationship with God.
Now, this did not come as a surprise to God. In fact, God had predicted this would happen. Read with me in Deuteronomy 31, verses 16 and 17.
Deuteronomy 31:16-17
16 And the LORD said to Moses: "You are going to rest with your fathers, and these people will soon prostitute themselves to the foreign gods of the land they are entering. They will forsake me and break the covenant I made with them. 17 On that day I will become angry with them and forsake them; I will hide my face from them, and they will be destroyed. Many disasters and difficulties will come upon them, and on that day they will ask, ’Have not these disasters come upon us because our God is not with us?’ (NIV)
Wow! Does that not destroy some of the things you learned growing up in Sunday School? That doesn’t sound like the God we know, does it? An angry God? I thought God wasn’t mad at me no matter what? That’s what my phone book says!
But, that’s what it says. “I will become angry with them.” And get this…“and forsake them.” I thought God said He’d never leave us or forsake us! And yet, He did them. Will He not us?
Friends, although God never “arbitrarily” leaves us or forsakes us, the Bible is pretty upfront about the fact that if you forsake Him, He will forsake you. Make no doubt about it, you can leave God if you want to. God never forces you into a relationship with Him. And He never forces you to stay in a relationship with Him. Now, He draws you. He woos you. But you can reject God. In fact, Isaiah 59:2 says,
Isaiah 59:2
2 But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden his face from you, so that he will not hear. (NIV)
And that’s exactly what had happened to the Israelites. They had forsaken God for so long, and by that I mean, they had lived for so long without having God as the number one priority in their lives, that God finally said, “Okay, if that’s the way you want it, that’s the way you’ll have it. I’m out of here.” And He left.
And so, the next time they needed God, God was gone. They had forsaken Him. And He, in turn, had forsaken them.
And that’s the way it was for a long time.
In fact, we read that it was that way for over twenty years. For twenty years, the Israelites lived as if there were no presence of God.
And it wasn’t because the Ark was gone that long. No, they got the Ark back within 7 months. You see, the Philistines stole the Ark of the Covenant, and put it into one of their own Temples – the Temple of Dagon. And it says, the next morning, they walk in and find that the statue of Dagon has fallen face down on the floor at the foot of the Ark of the Covenant. And so, they set it back up. And the they come in the next morning and find that the statue of Dagon had fallen again. And this time, it’s head and arms were broken off.
And so, they said, we’ve got to do something about this. And so, they moved it into one of their cities. And everybody in the city began to get tumors. And so, they moved it to another city. And those people began to get tumors. You can read this for yourself in 1 Samuel chapters 5 and 6.
And so, within 7 months of stealing the Ark of the Covenant from the Israelites, the Philistines sent it back. Isn’t that awesome!
And when they did, Israel made a place for it in the city of Kiriath Jearim.
The interesting thing about it is, as we read in verse 2, even though the Ark was back, there was still no active relationship between God and Israel. Why not? It says they “mourned and cried after the Lord.” Isn’t that what makes God move? Isn’t that what God wants? Isn’t that what God asks of us? Isn’t that what repentance is?
No. Again, repentance is not feeling bad for what you’ve done. It’s changing the way you look at what you’ve done to the point where you don’t do that anymore.
Repentance is seeing my destructive behavior as destructive behavior. And then, because of that, stopping it.
Repentance is seeing sinful behavior for what it is – rebellion against God – and then, because of that, stopping it.
Repentance is seeing that life is not supposed to be lived with a focus on myself, and, then, because of that, I begin living for God and others.
And repentance, not sorrow was what God was after
You see, the Israelites were sorry that they had lost the ark. But they weren’t repentant for what they had done.
And how do we know that?
Because in verse 3, it says,
1 Samuel 7:3a
3 And Samuel said to the whole house of Israel, "If you are returning to the LORD with all your hearts, then rid yourselves of the foreign gods and the Ashtoreths ..." (NIV)
You see, the Israelites were still worshipping things God had forbidden them to worship. They were worshipping the false gods of the Canaanites, which God had commanded them to stay away from. And so, they were, in essence, committing high treason against God.
And friends, you can’t have it both ways. You can’t have the presence of God. And at the same time be devoting yourselves to things God has commanded you not to do, It simply won’t work that way. God is not going to be part of it!
And so, even though, the Israelites were seeking the Lord, they had not stopped doing the things that destroyed the relationship in the first place. In fact, nothing had changed. The people were still living like they did when the Ark of God was stolen.
You know, it sounds kind of like a husband whose wife throws him out of the house because of the way he’s been living. And, after a few days, the husband wants to come back home, because he misses his wife, and he misses is house, and he doesn’t like being out on the street. And so, he tells her how sorry he is, and how he’ll never do it again, and how things are going to be different this time. And they may be…for a while. Maybe for a couple of weeks. But then, things start to get bad again. And he starts doing those same old things that got him in trouble in the first place. And so, it’s not too long before she’s kicking him out again.
Why? Because he wasn’t ready to change. Oh, he wanted the benefits of the relationship. But he wasn’t willing to fulfill all the responsibilities that come with a relationship.
And that’s the way the Israelites were. They missed the presence of God. They liked having Him around. They liked knowing that they could conquer anybody in the world. And yet they weren’t willing to keep their part of the bargain.
And so, even though God was there, the relationship wasn’t.
And friends, some of you are there. You have known the presence of the Lord. You know what it’s like to have an active, living relationship with God. And yet, somewhere along the way, you let other things get in between you and Him. Until, now, you have no real interaction with Him at all. He’s way over there, and you’re over here. And you’re not happy about that. But that’s just the way it is. You know something’s not right. But you just don’t have the motivation to do anything about it.
Friend, if that’s you, I want to pray for you right now. And I want to ask God to begin to draw you near once more. Would you agree with me on that? Let’s just pray,
Father, I know you are there. And I know that our relationship has been good in the past. I remember the times when talking to you was as natural as talking with one of my best friends. And yet, it’s not like that at all now. It feels like there’s a barrier between you and me. And I know that I have allowed that barrier to come in. And I may have even created the barrier myself. But Father, I want to ask you right now to draw me to Yourself again. I’m not even sure I feel like praying this prayer right now, I feel like we have grown so far apart. But even still, I ask you, Bring me back. Take me back Draw me back to You. I humbly ask this in Jesus name. Amen.
Friends, I believe God wants to do just that, don’t you?
But, you know what? It’s going to take something on your part. You do have a responsibility in this relationship. And God has promised us, He will fulfill His if we fulfill ours.
And so, what does it take to restore a relationship with God?
1. IT TAKES WHOLEHEARTED SINCERITY.
Verse 3 says,
3 And Samuel said to the whole house of Israel, "If you are returning to the LORD with all your hearts… "
Basically, Samuel was saying, “If you guys are really serious about this, now, we’re gonna do it right. No more playing games. This is serious. In fact, this is life or death. If you’re not coming here with ulterior motives, and you are truly ready to get right with God, then it can happen. But if you’re not, then don’t waste your time, or God’s.
Because, you see, God does not respond to halfhearted promises. He is not fooled by someone who is trying to pull the wool over His eyes. And He is not interested in playing, “Let’s Make a Deal” with you. The deal has already been made. The question is, are you ready to hold up your end of the bargain.
He has made a way for you to have a relationship with Him. But, He says, you’ve gotta be serious about it.
2. IT TAKES UNDIVIDED DEPENDENCE.
Look at verse 3 again,
3…then rid yourselves of the foreign gods and the Ashtoreths…”
You see, the problem with foreign gods and Ashtoreths was, although they weren’t real gods, and although they were just statues of gold, silver, or wood, the people would talk to them, and pray to them, and offer sacrifices to them, and give them offerings to in order to get their blessings.
And they would then, give thanks to all those gods for giving them good crops, good health, and that sort of thing.
Well, as you can imagine, God was not happy with that. Why? Because He was THE GOD who brought the Israelites out of Egyptian bondage. He was THE GOD of Abraham Isaac and Jacob. And it was Him that deserves the glory for all the blessing life had to offer, And God is very jealous of His glory.
He doesn’t want any false god to get credit for what He’s done. And so, He says, “Quit praying to that lump of stone, or that stick of wood. Stop thanking a piece of metal for giving you life, and start praising the very Creator of life!
And so, He says, “Get rid of all those false gods. No more looking to a god who doesn’t exist for help. You are going to have to put your trust fully in the Me.”
Then He says…
3 “…commit yourselves to the LORD and serve him only”
3. IT TAKES ABSOLUTE ALLEGIANCE.
God is not willing to share you with anybody, or anything else. He’s doesn’t want you to be praising Him while you’re in church, and then, cheating on Him as soon as you leave.
No, in order for your relationship with God to be restored, you have to get rid of all the mistresses in your life.
Jesus said, in Luke 16:13
13 "No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other…" (NIV)
4. IT TAKES UNQUALIFIED HONESTY.
Verse 6
6 When they had assembled at Mizpah, they drew water and poured it out before the LORD. On that day they fasted and there they confessed, "We have sinned against the LORD."
So many times, we admit that we’ve failed, but we qualify it by saying, “I messed up BECAUSE…” And then we justify why we messed up. I messed up because I was tired that day, or I was cranky that day, or my kids were getting on my nerves, or That’s just the way I was raised, or It’s just a bad habit of mine, etc.” And we explain to God why it was we messed up.
And, basically, what we’re saying is, “Sure God, I messed up. But it was okay because I had this really great excuse.”
But friend, God is not interested in your take on why you sinned, or why it was justified. He simply wants you to just admit it. Just say it, “You sinned.” You didn’t slip up. You didn’t struggle. You sinned. Plain and simple. Just be honest with God. He knows the truth anyway.
And so, when you apologize, when you say you’re sorry, when you repent, don’t explain why you failed. Just admit it and ask for forgiveness,
5: IT TAKES A TEST TO KNOW FOR SURE.
Verses 7 and 8
7 When the Philistines heard that Israel had assembled at Mizpah, the rulers of the Philistines came up to attack them. And when the Israelites heard of it, they were afraid because of the Philistines. 8 They said to Samuel, "Do not stop crying out to the LORD our God for us, that he may rescue us from the hand of the Philistines."
Before the Israelites were even through with their sacrifices, the Philistines were already on the attack.
The enemy will always attack you when you’re making a commitment to the Lord. But tests are not a bad thing. Thank God for tests. Without tests, we’d never know where we stood. We wouldn’t know what to fix. And we’d never know the thrill of victory.
You see, the tests show our true colors. And they reveal where our true loyalty lies.
Before, the Israelites were cocky. They thought they could conquer the world on their own. But now, they knew that their victory was fully dependant upon what God did for them.
And look what He did.
Verses 10-11
10 While Samuel was sacrificing the burnt offering, the Philistines drew near to engage Israel in battle. But that day the LORD thundered with loud thunder against the Philistines and threw them into such a panic that they were routed before the Israelites.
11 The men of Israel rushed out of Mizpah and pursued the Philistines, slaughtering them along the way to a point below Beth Car.
When Israel came back into a relationship with God, God mightily defeated Israel’s enemies. All Israel had to do go through the motions. God won the battle.
And notice what Samuel did.
Verse 12
12 Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."
Samuel made a memorial that said, “Thus far, the Lord has helped us.”
You know what that says to me? It says to me, we’re not taking anything for granted. We’re taking this thing one day at a time. The Lord has brought me through thus far. And if I make it through tomorrow, I’ll have the same testimony. It will be only by the grace of God. It’s nothing I’ve done on my own. It’s all about Him.
Friends, are you ready for a relationship with God? God has made the way. He has opened the door for you through His Son, Jesus Christ.
There’s no question that God was willing to pay the cost for a relationship with you. The question is, are you willing to pay the cost for a relationship with Him?
Are you ready to stop plying games with God? Are you ready to stop using Him when you need Him and forgetting about Him when you don’t?
Are you ready to put your trust fully in Him?
Are you ready to give up all you mistresses and remain loyal to Him and only Him?
Are you ready to admit that the only reason you’ve made it this far is because of the grace of God?
And are you ready to pass the test when it comes?
If so, I want you to pray with me right now….
