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http://www.adrian.warnock.info/2005/10/good-news-when-feeling-rejected.htm
Good news when feeling rejected
Gal 1:11- 2:16
Intro
REFER BACK TO LAST GAL TALK AND QUOTE 1:3-4
Everyone has experiences in live of rejection and acceptance.
’Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me’ is a LIE
Areas of the brain which light up when physical pain occurs also light up when people are rejected....
We will all know what it is to feel hurt, let down and rejected- a key question is how do we respond to that.
Do we
1.Fight back and reject others
2.bitter and withdrawn not daring to relate on an emotional level with others �the introvert� Can we trust anyone? Some people decide we cant-
-BOY ON A WALL/BUILDING -JUMP ILL CATCH YOU- e3 and on LAST ONE- DIDNT -boy landed hard, really hurt himself Father ’Now, let that teach you something- never trust anybody in your whole life- they will only let you down!’
If you dont wake anyone up they wont reject you
If you shout loud enough they wont have time to reject you!
2.Do we become fearful of rejection and work as hard as we can to please others in any situation we find ’the extrovert’
People today understand so little about love (REF other talk) that many of us grow up longing for love and approval one way or the other
Some people live with "youre not good enough" as kids and then as adults.
For many of us, we just want to hear someone say "well done"
Many of us make the drive for approval our defining purpose in life- this can be true of the popular one who is ever afraid that their popularity will evaporate, and the unpopular one who lives a life of quiet desperation
Some of us do anything we can to just avoid conflict
The most important question we can ask ourselves is -who are we trying to please?
"You can please some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time but you cant please all of the people all of the time"
Who did Paul try and please?
"For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ" (Gal 1:10)
For most of us, our natural tendency is to want to please ourselves first and formost. We tend to want to please others because having others pleased with us is actually what we want.
Legalism is often about keeping others happy. It has a certain power to bring outside conformity to ’good behaviour’, but if such conformity is only skin deep it will not please God.
We need to live our lives for an audience of one. Cf ONE THING
For Paul, after his salvation, the approval of men was secondary. This is why he felt no need to go straight to Jerusalem to see the apostles.
Not a man pleaser, but a God-pleaser
He thought was committed to pleasing God even before he was saved- although he didn’t realise he wasn’t doing that - instead he wanted to please man.
RELIGION IS ACTUALLY OFTEN ABOUT PLEASING MAN, CHRISTIANITY IS ABOUT PLEASING GOD
Was a member of the sanhedran and voted in favour of putting Christians to death (And I did so in Jerusalem. I not only locked up many of the saints in prison after receiving authority from the chief priests, but when they were put to death I cast my vote against them. Acts 26:10)
If they hated Christ, they will hate you
But NOT an excuse to be offensive!
PAUL had to lay aside the approval of man, and live in obscurity for a while. God wanted to test him outside of the limelight to see if he would be the right sort of person in the limelight- God often does that with us.......
PAUL did not require man’s approval of his message as he had received it from God.
There is a sense in which this is true for all of us- we stand or fall before God alone.
Notice, however, he did see it as important that the church recognised his call- this second visit to Jerusalem is presumably the one recorded in Acts 11 so means that Paul had the approval of the Jerusalem Apostles before he set out on his missionary journeys. Thus, Paul’s gospel wasn’t moulded by the original Apostles, but it was consistent and subsequently approved by them. Paul knew that it was vital that the church taught the same thing. The same God who had taught him the gospel had taught the Jerusalem apostles. They joined hands recognising what God had done.
This has sometimes happened with newfrontiers when the family of churches has begun to work in another country we have sometimes found a small family of churches that God has raised up who match our values and we have been able to join hands with them. It is encouraging to realise that groups can independently come to the same values.
Often this can be the experience of people joining Jubilee. They come in saying "I never knew that churches exist that teach what yours does!" It is an amazing experience to come into a church and discover they teach what you have always believed. There can sometimes be things that people have come to believe themselves, perhaps even that contradict teaching they have heard elsewhere that resonate with what we teach here!
However, as we see later in this passage, sometimes disagreements do occur, and it is important not to deny them. If you feel uncomfortable about something you hear us teach, check it out in the bible and come and talk to us about it! If Paul and Peter can disagree (and do so publicly) then surely we can do so in private!
It was important to Paul to record this disagreement- Luke’s Acts is unusual in Biblical history in that by enlarge it doesn’t record the human heroes mistakes. The letters reflect a fuller picture, but it is somewhat a one-sided conversation. Its like listening to one side of a phone conversation- it would seem that the bible writers don’t want to give too much attention or airtime to the false teachers.
Peter was afraid of the opinion of the men from James. Feared the lack of approval or rejection from them. He hypocritically changed his practice (although not his doctrine) - Paul uses words from this greek root.
Peter actually was undermining the position of the gentiles- hurting their feelings but also harming their faith. Not eating with someone harms them.
Peters actions opens the door to bad doctrine
Its not enough to know the truth, you have to live it.
Life must match your doctrine
Cant afford to be hidden.
Paul was betrayed by his closest friend- he understands.
We must be aware that our way of life can itself open the way for false doctrine to enter.
False doctrine will also affect the way we live.
We tend to come up with all kinds of ways of separating ourselves from people. We all want to be on the side of the excluder not the excluded.
"I am better than you.."
Do we "draw back" and separate ourselves?
WE MUST NOT REJECT OTHERS BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT LIKE US.....
Gospel was a personal matter to Paul- took the rejection of the gospel as a rejection of him. He was wedded to the gospel.
We struggle when people reject us. Lets make sure it is for the gospel not anything else. Some people will react to us not because of what we actually say but because of what they think we say.
How do we deal with rejection?
-Remember Jesus was rejected for us!
John 1:10-3 (NLT) But although the world was made through him, the world didn’t recognize him when he came. Even in his own land and among his own people, he was not accepted. But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. They are reborn! This is not a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan--this rebirth comes from God.
We the rejected are judged by whether we reject or accept Jesus. If we will accept him and his work for us, then he will accept us. God plus me is a majority- in a sense what else do I need.
READ Is 53,
This passage explains the gospel, we must never move away from this.
--Remember God has accepted us
"The gospel of grace is a message of breathtaking freedom. It must be embraced with faith and thanksgiving. You are thoroughly accepted just as you are. Jesus Christ is your righteousness and he is never going to change. He is the same yesterday today and forever. When you wake tomorrow, he will still be your righteousness, before you have done anything to enjoy Gods favour. You have to earn nothing. Your spirit needs to bask in the brilliant sunlight of this reality. You need to know it inwardly and celebrate it on a daily basis." Terry Virgo
-Get stuck into a church which will demonstrate the love of God to us
WE shouldnt depend on others, but we CAN trust God in others- he knows our needs for love and acceptance and we can rely on him to provide them, through others.
BUT dont sit waiting for others to reach out to us- or we will be perceived as part of the problem and not part of the solution. "No one rang me" but who did you ring?
Your act of ringing someone else can itself prompt other acts of love by that person to others.... Make sure we are not rejecting others, but instead are channels of his love.
At the end of the day, it is only God that can be depended on- a job a marriage, a friendship, even membership in a church can all end in 5minutes as either bad news comes, you are rejected or you decide it is time to move on. We do stand alone before God as Paul stated.
VISION AT LEADERS- Sometimes in our lives it can feel as if we are being tossed around in an ocean and are clinging desparately onto a piece of wood- the one thing that we can depend on -God. This can seem like a good picture of faith and indeed at times it is exactly how it feels
BUT, the man with the vision said it suddenly switched and he realised that the ocean was the ocean of God’s love and grace and understanding and power. Far from being swept around the person is floating in the amazing superabundant provision of God. The piece of wood is merely our understanding of God which is so very limited
