Pressures In The Home

I believe the home is the foundation of all influence. I believe it is more influential than the church, then the school, than your job. If Satan can continue to destroy the home, He can wipe out all Christian influence.

I want to give just a few words of explanation about the message. Before we show God’s order for the home, a marriage, I want to expose some of the problems, then show the cure. Before a person can find out how to get to a place they must first find out where they are at.

I. Let's Define Some Terms

1. Pressures; 1 Corinthians 1:4, Tribulation; James 1:1-5, Temptation

a. The word means pressed down, body pain, emotional or metal pain. Any kind of pressure.

b. The problem is not the absence of pressure, but the attitude toward them, how to handle them.

2. we will define things said tonight to the inward parts of the home, husband, wife, children, relationship.

a. Not necessarily as a family, but as a whole in the community.

b. Because of some family’s name, there is different treatment toward them.

3. The home

a. Most people act differently in the home, then they do elsewhere, language, attitude, usually it is worse.

4. We will name some the things that may cause pressures in the home. I will not cover all of them. They may not be in your priorities. Nothing is intended to be personal only if the Holy Spirit applies them.

II. Pressures

1. Personalities

a. Where each of you get on each other’s nerves.

b. All of us feel that we have the perfect personality

c. My wife is such a lucky person to have a man like me, or a woman like me. Sometimes we tell them so!

d. Well I could be a lot worse.

e. Try to understand that somethings about a person will never change. Quit trying. Accept them as they are.

f. Then there are some things about us, my personalities can change. Ask your mate to help you here.

g. I do not intentionally want to hurt or offend my wife.

1) Things I say

2) Things I do

2. Friends

a. For the most of us when we got saved, we got a new friend.

b. Same is true about marriage

c. I feel all of us need friends but be wise in the friends you choose.

1) Friends have a great influence on us.

d. I know that there is no one that chooses your friends for you.

e. Most of the problems come not with the personalities of our friends, but with the priorities of our friends.

1) Your mate would not care who your friends were, as long as it did not affect your priorities.

2) What are your priorities, family time, time with your mate, be honest, we spend little time with them? They were better off dating us.

3) Your moral life. If your friends drag you down morally, stay away from them

4) Don’t use you, take advantage of you.

3. Finances, money

a. I wonder how many tears, have been shed, how many quarrels, arguments, have been said over bills that could not be paid.

b. Most of the time both parties are to blame.

c. Learn to live on what you make.

d. If both spouses work then both need to be involved in handling the money, paying the bills, handling the accounts.

e. No one should be solely responsible. Things happen. Bills get neglected when both are not involved.

f. If you are fortunate to have only one in the home working, it is not right to put the responsibility of paying the bills on the other.

1) It’s not right for me to bring the check home to Sandra, and then gripe at her when we have no money.

2) God has blessed us. I have the ability to be the provider for the home.

f. Put God first. Matthew 6;33, Luke 6:38, Malachi 3:10

g. Learn to budget.

1) Use a calendar

2) Mark down when a bill is due and pay it.

h. I want to cover leadership, providing in another message. If a man is too lazy to work…ought to shoot him and tell God, he died. Just kidding.

4. Family. Ephesians 5:26-31

a. In laws and parents

1) From a parent’s point of view. Let them be a family on their own. You turn loose, let them solve their own problems.

2) Give advice only when they ask for it. Same way with help.

3) From the kids’ point of view. Stand on your own two feet. Make it for yourself. Seek advice, but not a handout.

b. I see nothing wrong with parent and kids living in the same town, as long as neither interfere with the other.